30 Day AU
by Silence-Speaker
Summary: Written using the prompts from the 30 Day Au list. Various pairings, Slash, Gen. Fantasy, Time Travel, College, High School, Circus Etc. Warnings in each chapter. Rated M for the gore in one chapter and because I am paranoid. Collection of Oneshots.
1. Chapter 1 Fantasy

30 Day AU Challenge

Write or Draw anyone from any fandom in the following 'Alternate Universes':

1. Fantasy

2. Highschool

3. 1950s

4. Superhero

5. Western/Cowboys

6. 1920s/Mafia

7. Steampunk

8. Disney Movie/Fairytale

9. Police/Detectives

10. Time Travel

11. Hogwarts/Harry Potterverse

12. Runaways/Homeless

13. 1940s/WWII

14. Pirates

15. Asylum

16. Turn of the Century

17. Plot of your Favorite Book

18. Elizabethan Era

19. Futuristic

20. Prostitutes/Strip Club

21. College

22. Office

23. Vampires (and Werewolves xD)

24. Genderswapped

25. Circus

26. The Plot of your Favorite Movie

27. Hospital

28. Orphanage

29. In A Band

30. Any Other of Your Chosing!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, not the 30 Day AU prompt list or the Hobbit.**

**Warnings: Spoiler alert for The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. **

**The updates won't be every day but I will finish this fic, I'm nearly done already.**

**1. Fantasy - Sort of based on The last airbender.**

* * *

Bilbo sighed wearily.

Who knew his ring, the ring that had helped Thorin's Company massively in their quest to reclaim Erebor, was so dangerous.

And he had placed that horrific burden on his beloved nephew's shoulders.

Bilbo had used the ring in Erebor sometimes when Nori needed the help and couldn't trust his spy network to do the job. Bilbo had used it happy to help; he was the Consort Under the Mountain after all. (And it was a darn sight more thrilling than diplomatic meals which usually ended in fights).

Nori was still kicking himself, he had looked sickened when he realised that by asking Bilbo to use the ring he had been damming Bilbo further. Bilbo had reassured him, well attempted to anyway, it had been Bilbo's choice to use it, he could have declined and if he had the option he would probably do so all again if he woke up back in time.

(No, he wouldn't, he would find Gandalf and attempt to destroy it once and for all so Frodo didn't have to shoulder his burdens...)

Bilbo had given the ring to Frodo when he turned 30 (instead of the 33 Bilbo had been planning on) because Thorin had acted strangely around it. It had reminded Bilbo of Thorin's descent into Gold madness when they first reclaimed the mountain and Bilbo had no desire to witness that alarming change in his husband a second time; it overrode his reluctance to part with the useful ring.

Then three years after he had passed the ring on Gandalf had arrived with a worrisome scowl plastered over his face. He had cornered Bilbo that evening, in his private rooms for a private chat.

* * *

xxx

"You aren't using it are you?" Gandalf asked seriously. Bilbo frowned.

"Using what?" Bilbo asked bewildered. Gandalf frowned angrily.

"Do not act like you don't know, where is the ring?" Gandalf ordered harshly. Bilbo's face cleared.

"Oh! I gave it to Frodo, three years ago now, it was doing something funny to Thorin, gave him those awful headaches. I haven't used it for four years, since the time I helped Nori scout the cavern when there was a threat of explosives from that odd dwarf clan, I can't quite recall the name. That was quite a trying time, attempting to quell everyone's nerves when we didn't even know what was going to happen!" Bilbo shook his head and returned to the relevant conversation only to find Gandalf absolutely beaming at him.

"I say! You can learn all about them in a month, but even after a hundred years hobbits can still surprise you!" Gandalf chuckled seeming much relieved. Bilbo sucked in a breath.

"There's something off about the ring, isn't there." Bilbo asked Gandalf shrewdly. Gandalf patted his shoulder.

"I don't think there's anything to worry about for the present." Gandalf soothed.

"That Gollum creature, I have never seen the likes of him before and ever since. The ring was turning on my mind more and more often, just before I gave it to Frodo and giving it was a wrench, I don't think I could have if it wasn't affecting Thorin...I felt lighter, when I gave it up. Gandalf, I have lived far too long without aging. I felt my age but didn't look it." Bilbo said attempting to put his thoughts in order his clever brain fixing the missing pieces in the puzzle. Gandalf suddenly, looked very, very old.

"I gave it to my nephew..." Bilbo said aghast. Bilbo fixed Gandalf with a stern glance, one he learned worked wonders when he tried to get his dwarves back in order, it also worked well on foreign dignitaries itching for a fight, well it at least ensured that the fight didn't occur until they were inside the training rooms or even outside the mountain.

"I assume it is something like the seven rings the dwarf lords were gifted. Insidious rings that looked innocuous but crept up in their minds, slightly tweaking certain desires, thankfully dwarves are a stubborn race, much like the stone they delve in and so didn't succumb fully. It isn't one of them is it? Old friend?" Bilbo asked worriedly. He had read many of the books in the library (he had managed to learn how to read Khuzdul without outside help, he wasn't allowed to speak it however and only a few knew of his ability to understand it when others spoke and able to read it, it was prohibited from outsiders after all).

Thorin had pulled an odd face when he realised Bilbo could understand and read Khuzdul but he acknowledged it was a skill Bilbo couldn't be without. Nori had been delighted, it meant Bilbo could understand plots hatching right before his nose and visiting dwarves didn't realise Bilbo could understand every word so they spoke with slightly more abandon in front of Bilbo. Something he exploited with a mischievous glint to his warm brown eyes.

"No, I do not believe it is one of the seven." Gandalf answered. Bilbo sagged in relief before eyeing Gandalf's grim countenance with a groan.

"It's something worse. And I've cursed my nephew with it." Bilbo said pressing his hands against his eyes harshly.

"Come, come take heart! Nothing has happened so far so let us not assume something will." Gandalf's words heartened Bilbo slightly but both were worried for the future.

After Bilbo had given up the ring he started aging, normally not sped up or anything, he aged like he should have sixty-one years ago. Bilbo was one-hundred and eleven and he looked only fifty.

* * *

xxx

Seventeen years later:

Frodo was nearly fifty and he only looked thirty. Bilbo hated that simple gold ring more than ever, even while he thanked it for all the extra years Bilbo had had with his family. He had warned Frodo about his concerns but he had little idea of what could or would happen.

Bilbo was nearly one-hundred and thirty when the black rider came to the gates of Erebor.

Frodo, and the ring, were off visiting the Shire, for awhile on Gnadalf's advice Frodo was going to visit Rivendell before he returned to Erebor, Bilbo had sighed in relief at that thought before another thought overcame it sending him into another fretful worry, what if there was more than just this one black rider?! What if there were others just as dangerous hunting down his nephew?!

At Thorin's vehement refusal to tell the rider where 'Baggins of the Shire' was the wraith like figure had lost its temper viciously stabbing Thorin with its blade before it was run out the dwarves screaming battle cries and wielding flaming torches.

That evening when after one of Thranduil's healers had examined it and used an odd plant to help, something called Athelas two eagles had appeared willing to carry both Bilbo and Thorin to Rivendell. Bilbo had never thanked his stars so fervently before then.

Bilbo had always fielded the diplomatic relations between Thranduil and Thorin (Legolas, the kings son had stood in for his father) and so was friends of a sort with a few of the elves of Mirkwood, the elves liked him and he in turn was fascinated by them, and he liked them of course.

And after the Battle of the Five armies Bilbo had regularly sent freshly killed meat to the eagles along with a message, thanking them for their aid. He had also helped heal an eagle; he had been travelling to the Shire on one of his infrequent visits when he had found an eagle, a black arrow piercing the giant bird's feathery plumage.

Bilbo had pulled the arrow out and then treated it; bringing food for the bird while it recovered. The eagles had been rather eager to help Bilbo after that; apparently that particular eagle was the lord of the Eagles youngest son.

So Bilbo had left Fíli in charge of Erebor and he and Thorin had been taken to Rivendell.

When they got to Rivendell it was to find his nephew, Frodo, laid up in one of the beds having also been stabbed with a Morgul blade also, Elrond had told Bilbo what it was. Lord Elrond had worked tirelessly to save Frodo and Thorin and had managed to bring them back from the brink of death, much to Bilbo's exhausted relief, Frodo had been worse off than Thorin in that a shard had remained in Frodo's wound and the ring had sped up the effects and in the fact that Frodo had been stabbed days before Thorin.

But Hobbits, it seemed, were an incredibly hardy race, much to Gandalf's (and Bilbo's) evident relief.

Bilbo, Thorin and Frodo were invited to the council meeting that was to be held a few days hence.

Now safely assured Thorin and Frodo would make a recovery, not a full one Bilbo was horrified to learn, he could relax a little. He spent many of his waking hours with Thorin and Frodo's still sleeping forms but he did make the time to chat to the elves including Elrond and listen to the enchanting music and stories. The elves had pestered him for his stories so Bilbo had obliged, he did love story telling after all. He told them about the trolls first.

...Bilbo gulped as Fíli and Kíli pushed him forwards, how was he supposed to free the ponies?!

Now, all hobbits had a connection to the earth, just like the dwarves had a connection to gems and precious metals, but it was a small connection, enough to ensure their crops grew well and bountiful. Bilbo, however, had always been different.

While other children his age were encouraging seedlings to sprout Bilbo was trying to make the flower stop growing! His mother found him later sitting sulkily on the actual petals of a huge plant, petals each about the size of Bilbo himself. She had laughed while he pouted, not wanting to be different.

Other hobbits had assumed Bilbo was slow to come into his 'earth magic' like some occasionally were and so thought nothing of it. Bilbo however was attempting to control his 'earth magic' so he could do little things rather than huge unnecessary things. Bungo, being a well learned hobbit, had told Bilbo to listen to the earth instead, rather than forcing it. Bungo, like other hobbits couldn't do what Bilbo could and couldn't listen to the earth but he had read about a rare few, who excelled in their affinity who would listen to it as though it was a sentient life form.

It worked much to Bilbo's relief.

And if the fires ever roared and grew bigger whenever Bilbo was angry, Belladonna and Bungo never mentioned it nor made much note of it.

And then the wizard had come, talking about an adventure and perhaps learning to harness the other affinities Bilbo possessed too. Bilbo had shut his door in Gandalf's face, he was perfectly happy with just his ability to garden (and garden well), thank you very much.

And if, after his home was invaded by dwarves, a log in the fire exploded, well, no one seemed to notice apart from a particularly smug looking wizard.

Anyway, back to the trolls.

Bilbo had decided to test his fire affinity, certainly not the wisest time to do so if you recall his disastrous first attempt at harnessing the power of the earth.

Trolls may be remarkably oblivious but even trolls notice a larger than intended fire, burning away the rope (and the paddock) containing the ponies, thankfully the ponies were unharmed. Unfortunately Bilbo was captured. And then the dwarves had arrived.

Bilbo eyed the fire and the spit the dwarves were being turned on; he didn't want the fire to burn his friends so he decided not to attempt anything with it, still shuddering from the roaring flame filled inferno he had accidently created. Then his eyes lighted on the abandoned stew pot. Bilbo concentrated, fully consumed in his task, the pot tilted, the pot tilted even more and suddenly with a loud splash the pot upended over the fire putting it out.

Bilbo so thrilled with his work failed to notice he had been willing the liquid to move not the earth to push the solid iron pot over, it was an easy thing to overlook in such a dangerous situation.

The trolls started blaming each other for knocking over the pot before trying to re-light the fire. Every time the trolls tried to light the wood Bilbo would gently flick his fingers and the spark would fly wide missing the tinder completely.

Soon the trolls lost their patience and picked up Bombur ready to just eat them all raw. Bilbo hopped over awkwardly, still in his sack.

"Wait! You're making a terrible mistake! They're infested! With, with fleas...no parasites! It's highly infectious, I wouldn't risk it." Bilbo shouted watching in relief as the troll dropped Bombur in disgust. It was then that Gandalf cracked a large boulder letting the sun peer over the small clearing and turning the trolls to stone.

Bilbo grinned and with a quick twist of his fingers he carefully burnt the rope holding his wrists tied enough so Bilbo could snap it. Bilbo wriggled out of his sack and hurried to help the others out of theirs doing the same thing.

"We were rather lucky, with the pot falling and the trolls inability to light a fire." Gloin remarked cheerfully to no one in particular. Gandalf raised an eyebrow.

"I don't think luck had much to do with it." Gandalf remarked softly looking at Bilbo, Bilbo grimaced. So now he could light fires as well as influence the earth, great. Thorin followed Gandalf's gaze and his eyes narrowed on Bilbo thoughtfully.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo had enjoyed staying with the elves and was fascinated by their ability to harness the wind, it sang to them in a way Bilbo could only imagine.

Bilbo missed the easy peace of Imladris when they were stuck on the side of a mountain, rain pelting them and stone giants playing catch with perilous boulders. He barely noticed the roaring wind, howling its lament in his ears, talking to him, speaking of its assault of the mountain tops.

He could only cling to the rock face when a stone giant moved, half the company perched on its knee. Thankfully they weren't crushed but Bilbo lost his grip on the slippery stone and ended up hanging from the rocks a deadly drop below.

Bilbo panicked and he didn't notice as the wind picked up slightly, he did notice however when something, some force pushed him up and he scrambled back onto the platform with the others, the force providing the necessary push. He hadn't been out of sight long enough for the dwarves to notice his absence so they continued on finding a cave only Bilbo aware of his near tumble to death. Bilbo all the while dwelling on his new found...ability.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo didn't have time to think of a plan using his affinities when Azog was ordering Thorin's death, Thorin lying prone on the ground. The wind helped to boost him onto a stable branch and sword in hand Bilbo ran at the orc attempting to kill Thorin.

Bilbo would have enjoyed the flight with the eagles, relishing in the strong wind rushing through his hair, if Thorin wasn't injured and if he didn't look down, he really was not keen on heights.

But thankfully Thorin was fine (after Gandalf healed him); he even thanked Bilbo after apologising for his initial doubt of Bilbo's abilities as the Company's Burglar.

* * *

xxx

It wasn't until the spiders that Bilbo realised he could listen to the wind and utilise it. If earth was a solid dependable element, and fire was fickle then air was flirty, it constantly wanted to touch, ruffling Bilbo's curls for no other reason than it could but it was always eager to assist.

Bilbo had used it, along with plenty stones, an aggravating song and his little sword that he then dubbed 'Sting' to distract the spiders in Mirkwood and send them into a frenzy so he could release his friends from their webbed prison.

He didn't want to use fire in a forest, especially when his control over the element was flimsy at best, and as there was something dark affecting the forest, Bilbo didn't dare call the earth, afraid as to the interest that might gain or what might happen. There was something rotting at the core of the forest and Bilbo was loath to stir up trouble and at times the trees seemed almost alive, he emphatically did not want to burn down the forest by accident.

Bilbo used the nifty little ring he had found in the goblin caves, near to the creature Gollum, to hide in the Elvin Kings home while attempting to think up an escape plan for the dwarves and him.

The dwarves were not pleased in the least to be shoved into barrels and then pushed into the river but it was the only escape plan they had.

Bilbo was in a terror the entire trip; he clung to a barrel in absolute acute panic. He had never liked large quantities of water even at the best of times; he didn't know how to swim properly!

But Bilbo survived and hurriedly lifted all the lids off the barrels when they reached shore, not noticing he was completely dry despite his tumble in the water, or that the dwarves whose barrels had leaked dried off far quicker than was normal.

Deep blue eyes watched the odd 'coincidences' with a sharp look and thoughts turning as he watched Bilbo eye the water with trepidation.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo was exchanging riddles with a dragon!

It was exhilarating while being dreadfully fearsome. Bilbo eyed his shaking hands; his nerves were utterly shot after this 'adventure'.

It was when Bilbo realised his mistake that he did something both brave and terribly foolish. He had let slip enough that Smaug had guessed he had been to Lake town so he was set on raising the town to ash.

Bilbo guilty for sending the dragons wrath on an innocent settlement had stood tall, still using his ring so invisible and directed Smaug's attention to him, Smaug wouldn't want to risk his treasure and so would not use his dragon fire inside unless extremely provoked, his fire could melt all his precious gold after all.

Bilbo distracted the dragon while he unscrewed the cap of his water bag. With a nod and curling of his hands Bilbo directed the water swiftly right into Smaug's mouth as Bilbo enraged his enough that he didn't even think about the treasure readying his dragon fire.

The water was just enough to quench Smaug's fire breathing. It wouldn't last for long but Bilbo had successfully disarmed Smaug of his most valuable weapon for an hour or so.

It was then that Smaug flew off intent on destroying Lake Town and so was shot by Bard, the Bowman. The thrush that had overheard Bilbo, warned Bard of the small patch on Smaug's belly that was free of precious stones. And luckily for the town the only damage done was from Smaug hurling rocks, for some odd reason he hadn't tried to raze the town through fire...

* * *

xxx

Bilbo handed over the Arkenstone to Bard, deliberately trying not to think about Thorin gifting Bilbo with a chain mail made of mithril, not because it was expensive but because it would keep Bilbo safe.

Bilbo also ignored the pretty blue flower broach that had been Thorin's mothers, pinned to his coat. Giving the Arkenstone would save them from war against the elves and men even if it lost Bilbo his friends.

He would prefer his friends alive and hating him than dead and thinking fondly of him.

Bilbo ducked, stabbing here and there with his sword, dubbed 'Sting' after the spider incident. It was utter carnage.

Bilbo was fighting his way over to his friends, hidden by his ring. There was fire, water, air and metal twisting all pitted against one another mixed with the clashing of swords, bows and arrows, axes and in some cases farming implements being wielded.

Bilbo found his friends just as Thorin was struck down.

Later Bilbo was told that he flickered into view, the ring safely back in his pocket, that the wind picked up howling, attacking the orcs and goblins with near visible rage, fires flared and wherever Bilbo walked, the ground still not recovered from Smaug's takeover of Erebor, bloomed with life, green grass lush. Rocks tripped up the suddenly fleeing orcs and goblins and fire scorched them.

Bilbo stood there in front of Thorin's prone form, eyes blank, utterly still. His hair wasn't even moving in the wind.

And then the Lake exploded. Water rushed over swallowing the goblins and orcs little pockets free from the raging water protecting the men, elves and dwarves, the wind keeping the water at bay and after, when the water had gone back into the lake as quick as it came the fires warmed them. It was terrifying and utterly magnificent.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo woke, two days later, his last memory of Thorin being struck down. Once he found out that the entire Company was fine and would soon return to full health he only wished for a nice hot cup of tea and some food.

Thorin came in awkward stilted apologies spewing from his lips, for treating him the way he did with the Arkenstone fiasco. When Bilbo had calmed him down slightly accepting the apology, just thankful Thorin was still alive, Bilbo asked about the battle and how it ended.

Bilbo hadn't believed the Company claims until Gandalf came and agreed with their version of events.

Bilbo fainted. He was terrified! What if he lost himself again and accidently hurt the people he loved? Or hurt innocents?

He calmed down a tad when Gandalf explained that he had only destroyed the goblin and orc army, not any of their allies. Still, Bilbo wished it wasn't him who could tap such power. When Bilbo voiced this the Company and Gandalf just laughed.

The land around Erebor produced a plentiful harvest that year and the ground surrounding the battle grew into a beautiful meadow filled with grass and blood red poppies. The huge meadow was left untouched, a monument to the battle fought there and a reminder of the alliance between elves, men, dwarves, eagles, skin changers and a lone hobbit and wizard.

(Bilbo was very pleased to find that despite the power he had accidently displayed during the battle he was still unable to do little more than produce small sparks, little gusts of wind and move small trickles of water when he tried, it was only his earth ability that was greater than most. Apparently to unlock his full abilities he needed to be sufficiently overwhelmed with emotion.

Which explained why, in his marriage bed, the candles frequently blazed brighter than should have been possible and how all the paintings hung on the walls managed to fall down all at once with no one touching them.)

* * *

xxx

But from then on Bilbo was a highly respected member of Erebor, even before he was consort under the mountain.

But Bilbo couldn't care less about all that at the moment, his husband was finally waking!

Bilbo smiled as Thorin opened his eyes frowning at the ceiling. "We're in Rivendell." Bilbo said softly grinning as Thorin groaned in annoyance. "Hush you; Lord Elrond has just saved your life and Frodo's. You will be civil while we're here." Bilbo ordered frowning at Thorin warningly.

"What happened to Frodo?" Thorin asked anxiously. Bilbo sighed.

"He's fine now, stay in the bed! You're not to get up till at least tomorrow." Bilbo ordered sternly ignoring Thorin's petulant frown. "The same thing that happened to you happened to poor Frodo." Bilbo said absently while he stroked Thorin's thick hair, gently untangling it noticing it was far more grey than black now.

"You and Frodo both were stabbed by a Morgul blade. Elrond believes it will cause you both some trouble in the future. You're going to have a limp now, but that'll be the least of your worries." And so Bilbo explained about the ring, the one ring, about Frodo's mad dash from the Shire along with Samwise Gamgee, Merriadoc Brandybuck and Peregrin Took. He told about their meeting with Strider, Aragorn son of Arathorn and a descendent of the Númenor, and a descendent of Isildur.

Bilbo told with amusement of Bill Furney, a shady character in Bree who sold a starved and ill looking pony to the four Hobbits and one Ranger for an extortionate price and how Sam hit him with a half eaten apple, right in the face for his nasty commentary. He spoke sombrely of Weathertop and the fives flight from the black riders and then Frodo's shoulder being stabbed. Bilbo also explained how Thorin and he ended up in Rivendell and that Gloin, Gimli and a few others had arrived to see how Thorin fared and to get some advice from Elrond.

The next day Frodo awoke.

The smile on Bilbo's face didn't dim the whole day as he watched his husband and nephew talk or sit in silence.

Frodo took after his dwarf uncle far too much for a hobbit and it nearly made Bilbo laugh to see the same expression on their different faces. Apart from both having black hair and vivid blue eyes they looked nothing alike, however when you observed them you would call them father and son. Frodo emulated Thorin unconsciously; they both brooded and frowned in the same way and that was only some of the obvious similarities.

Bilbo had a cheeky grin on his face as he entered the place where Elrond was holding the council. He had seen Merry and Pippin hiding in the bushes and Sam sitting by Frodo. Thorin took one look at his mischievous grin and shook his head muttering 'Hobbits'. Bilbo was sure that Merry, Pippin and Sam didn't have an invitation to the council meeting.

Bilbo tugged at his heavy fur coat mournfully, it was delightfully warm in the winter and soft but Bilbo did miss his simple hobbit clothing at times.

Frodo however, was a true dwarf, even if he looked like a hobbit. He wore the heavy clothes as a second skin and didn't like the thinness of hobbit layers, he carried his long knives and small throwing axes with pride (it always scandalised the hobbits to see someone so armed, even Bilbo was happy with just his letter opener).

Frodo also had properly braided hair with beads that showed he was a prince of Erebor but not a direct heir, so not in line for the throne. Bilbo had a single braid with two beads one Thorin had made him and one bead Frodo had made. Frodo didn't however, wear shoes (it wasn't necessary with a hobbit's hard soles) and he couldn't grow a beard a fact Frodo had lamented quite sadly in his tween years.

Frodo much preferred living in Erebor, he didn't miss the Shire like Bilbo did but he did make occasional trips to see his friends and relations.

Bilbo examined the people attending the meeting sending a warm smile to Legolas and sitting next to Aragorn. Thorin followed him grumbling about elves, Bilbo ignored him sending an eye roll to Legolas before turning to Aragorn.

"Thank you for looking after my nephew and his friends. They wouldn't have made it without you." Bilbo said heartfelt to Aragorn.

"If you ever have need, send word to Erebor." Thorin offered unexpectedly, Bilbo's eyes widening. Aragorn looked shocked himself.

"I-it's not necessary; it was Elrond who healed..." Aragorn began but Thorin spoke over him.

"Of course it's necessary; you saved the life of a Prince of Erebor." Thorin said shortly sitting down in a seat that was a little too big for a dwarf or hobbit and thus slightly comical. Bilbo was sure he could see some elves lips twitching whenever they looked at the small folk.

"If only you could be so diplomatic when speaking to our other allies." Bilbo grumbled making Legolas chuckle and Aragorn twist his lips trying not to smile. Bilbo spotted a travel stained man who looked familiar, Bilbo hopped up and walked over leaving Thorin, Aragorn and Legolas to 'chat', he hoped Aragorn didn't mind Thorin's rudeness to Legolas. Legolas just found it rather amusing, especially since he knew Bilbo well and was used to the hobbits grumbling over his dwarves.

"Consort Under the Mountain." The man greeted formally.

"Pish, ignore titles, Bilbo Baggins at your service." Bilbo said bowing. "Now, are you a relation to Faramir son of Denethor? You do resemble him an awful lot." Bilbo asked he had seen and spoken with Faramir at a diplomatic meeting held a few years ago, they exchanged letters when they could. Faramir was slighter and shorter than the man in front of him but they both had a noble bearing and their facial structure was similar.

"He's my younger brother. Boromir son of Denethor." Boromir greeted. Bilbo's eyes widened in recognition.

"Of course! He mentioned you a few times in his letters, said you were too overprotective for your own good." Bilbo chuckled. Boromir grinned at the mention of his brother.

"I'm his older brother." Boromir said justifying his actions.

"Of course! I told him it was your prerogative, my nephew Fíli is rather overprotective of his younger brother Kíli and my friend Dori is a mother hen when it comes to his younger brothers." Bilbo said a wide smile splitting his face. Before their conversation could continue a bell rang out signalling the beginning of the council. Bilbo hurried back over to Thorin noting Frodo was now seated by his side with Gandalf next to Frodo.

Bilbo explained how he got the ring and about Gollum to the council adding about the effects it seemed to have on some people carefully not mentioning Thorin's name and he explained about the effects he had felt himself.

He flinched resisting the urge to snatch the ring and run when Gimli tried to destroy it with his axe. Bilbo offered to take the ring to Mount Doom himself ignoring Thorin's 'subtle' attempts at shutting him up. At least Thorin's actions had made Frodo smile and Bilbo could have sworn he heard the high pitched giggles that could only come from Merry or Pippin.

Putting a hand over his mouth and dragging him against his solid chest was not really a subtle way for Thorin to get Bilbo to shut up...most of the council members found it amusing though.

Eventually it was decided. Frodo would take the ring to Mordor along with eight others. Bilbo couldn't help the wretched feeling he felt when he saw off his beloved nephew, maybe for the last time.

"He'll make it." Thorin said, although whether he was trying to convince Bilbo or himself was debatable. Bilbo chuckled a small watery chuckle.

"I know he will, he's far too like his uncle for his own good." Bilbo said smiling at Thorin with a raised eyebrow. Frodo was sometimes far too like Thorin for his own wellbeing.

"Yes, he is." Thorin said looking at Bilbo pointedly.


	2. Chapter 2 High School

**Disclaimer.**

**Warning: Kidnapping, abuse, slight Stockholm syndrome, mentions of torture, disturbing themes, slash.**

**2. Highschool**

**Human AU, Bilbo/Thorin**

* * *

Bilbo Baggins was a small, slight boy, someone who was more interested in books than anything else and who was fairly shy, he also got very good marks in class and always had a ready answer when the teachers asked him a question, he never stuck his hand up to be called upon though. And occasionally he stuttered.

In short, he was the type of person most likely to be bullied.

Only, for some strange reason, Bilbo Baggins was under Thorin Durin's protection. Bilbo was friends with Thorin's group; nick named the Company and so was not to be trifled with.

It was odd and puzzled many, why was the group protecting weedy little Bilbo Baggins who flinched when you looked at him wrong? It was more than them silently protecting him though, they seemed to like him, they were all friends.

It did look rather comical at lunch times when the Company was sat down with Bilbo in their midst, all thirteen were tall and muscled and looked even bigger compared to tiny little Bilbo who looked like he could be crushed by Ori's little finger, Ori the smallest of the group apart from Bilbo!

But despite the confusion the entire school knew Bilbo was not to be messed with.

Too bad Tom, Bert and Bill didn't get the memo.

* * *

xxx

Before:

Bolg, an arms dealer, had it in for the Durin family. His father Azog had killed Thror, father of Thrain and grandfather of Thorin, and so Thrain had put Azog behind bars when he became chief inspector. Thrain disappeared a few years later and evidence pointed towards Bolg, but they didn't have enough proof to convict him.

Bolg was determined to end the family and so targeted Thorin Durin, his sister Dis and her two sons Fili and Kili. Thorin was eight when he realised that they were being targeted by a mass murderer, Fili and Kili just seven.

Thorin's friends, being the nosy bastards they were, eventually found out and so helped around making sure Thorin, Fili and Kili were never alone around the school. Dwalin appointed himself honorary body guard.

Most of their group of friends had met in their boxing classes years ago and had remained friends through the years, adding Bofur, Bifur and Bombur to their fold later on, it was fortunate they all went to the same school.

Thorin lived with his older sister and her sons who were only a year younger than him and much more like brothers.

Because Thorin's friends had taken such a protective stance with him it had meant when Bolg finally made a move after years of threats he kidnapped them as well.

* * *

xxx

Thorin and his friends and Fili and Kili were locked in a basement somewhere, rarely let out and fed sparingly. Thorin was just thankful there were toilets and showers in the basement. He was even more thankful that something had come up, distracting Bolg from the prisoners in the basement; it was a good thing because Thorin had heard rumours about Bolg's love of torture.

Dis wasn't with them, so Thorin hoped she was safe in police custody or something.

It was three days into their captivity when they met Bilbo Baggins.

The small boy had rushed into the basement shutting the door quickly behind him and putting something small in his pocket. Then the boy had turned around utterly bemused to see them there.

The boy just stood there wide eyed staring at them.

"How did you get in here?" Thorin demanded, maybe they could escape the way the boy had got in. The boy swallowed nervously.

"I-I-I p-picked the l-locks and k-know the keycode." The boy stuttered out near whispering.

"Why did you want to come in?" Balin asked curiously. The boy shrugged.

"I come here to hide when-when t-they start drinking." The boy explained still looking like he wanted to bolt. Balin breathed in sharply.

"You mean you live here?!" Balin questioned, shocked. The boy nodded swiftly fingers clutching around the book he held in his hands tightly.

"Who else lives here?" Nori asked clever eyes scanning the boys frame.

"W-well a lot of-of Bolg's people visit but the only people who live here on a day to day business is me, S-Sauron, S-Shelob, S-Smaug a-and B-Bolg." The boys stutter became visibly worse as he named the people who he lived with; the boy looked around carefully as if saying their names could draw them here.

"You live with Bolg." Thorin stated flatly. The boy hunched in on himself slightly, his knuckles turning white around the book.

"Why do you live here? What about your parents?" Kili asked tactlessly. The boy flinched.

"My parents died when I was eight." The boy responded face pale not elaborating. Thorin shot Kili a quelling look.

"Can you help us escape?" Kili asked, obviously he missed the look Thorin had sent him. The boy bit his lip obviously wanting to help them but not wanting to get into trouble.

"When we escape you can come with us, tell the police, go somewhere better." Bofur suggested kindly. The boy looked visibly heartened by that and nodded determinedly. It made Balin and Nori wonder just how nasty living here was for Bilbo for him to be so visibly pleased at the idea of leaving.

"I'll help. The house should be empty in two weeks time, they're all going on a trip for a few days, I'm left by myself when they leave so that would be an opportune time, also it gives us enough time to plan an escape." The boy suggested sounding more and more confident as he spoke. "It'll be just like in the last Harry Potter book and they escape from the Malfoy's dungeon. Apart from no one will die like Dobby did, hopefully." The boy said bouncing on his heels.

He looked startled at the incredulous looks sent his way.

"It will be nothing like Harry Potter." Fili said confused. Bilbo frowned.

"Maybe more like Fantastic Mr. Fox and his escape from the farmers." The boy suggested voice wavering at the odd looks sent his way. "Or when White Fang escapes the small room through a window to join Weeden Scott." The boy trailed off.

"We're not really in a story book." Balin said. The boy rolled his eyes.

"I know that, I was just comparing situations. Don't people do that? Compare books to real life?" The boy asked. Balin shrugged. "Oh." The boy muttered.

"Oh! I've forgotten my manners, sorry. My name is Bilbo Baggins, happy to be of service." Bilbo greeted them looking at them expectantly.

"Thorin."

"Dwalin."

"Balin."

"Oin."

"Gloin."

"Bifur."

"Bofur."

"Bombur."

"Ori."

"Nori."

"Dori."

"Fili."

"Kili."

They greeted in turn. Bilbo frowned.

"Thorin, Dwalin, Balin, Bofur, Bifur, Bombur, Ori, Nori, Dori, Oin, Gloin, Fili and Kili." Bilbo said pointing to them all in turn getting everyone's name right. Dwalin raised an eyebrow.

"Clever." Dwalin comented. Bilbo blushed.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo visited them often, only leaving when he needed to, so Smaug, Shelob and Sauron didn't get suspicious, he wasn't supposed to talk to prisoners after all, Bilbo had learnt that lesson years ago. But he just couldn't stay away from the group of thirteen friends, they were interesting and he hoped he made a good impression. It would be nice to have friends.

Bilbo baked them cookies, much to their confusion but they demolished the treats quickly and with obvious delight. He brought them books to read and a chess board, all from his own private collection. Bilbo didn't have many things, Bolg was not predisposed to get Bilbo 'toys' or other entertainment but Bolg did give him lots of books.

Bilbo presumed Bolg took a few books off of people's bookshelves whenever he went to kill people or to threaten them. A couple of times Bolg had come back with a crate of books and a gleeful expression, Bolg had then described in great gory detail about that particular torture and murder session before handing over the books. Bilbo had thrown up the first time Bolg had described the way the blood pooled out and the sound of bones snapping in indecent delight. Bolg had punished him for that and taken away the books, Bilbo hadn't thrown up over gory comments ever since.

Although Shelob did delight in making him turn green over her comments.

Bilbo didn't watch TV, he wasn't allowed and his only points of human contact were Sauron, Shelob, Smaug and Bolg, not exactly ideal companions for a child. Smaug was a pyromaniac and more than once Bilbo had been cornered by him and drawn far closer than was comfortable to a flame (sometimes the fireplace), Smaug had then proceeded to tease Bilbo, pushing his hand blisteringly close to the fire but not pushing Bilbo's hand right into the actual flames and back and forth...it was more than a little disconcerting and Bilbo never looked at fire or candles without a shudder.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo was odd, pop culture references went over his head but when drawn to the surface his dry sarcasm and witty ironic remarks were amusing and sharp. He didn't go to school but he was allowed lots of books so studied from text books. Social interactions seemed to throw him for the loop. It took a week for them to get more information about himself.

"My parents died when I was eight, a car crash, I was...lucky to survive. My cousin took me in for a while but she didn't want to so she made great uncle Denethor take me in. He had some debts with Bolg and so Bolg kidnapped me to make Denethor pay them quicker but Denethor didn't bother, I think he set himself on fire before jumping off the roof of a tall building, Bolg made me watch it on camera. So Bolg kept me, I think he meant to groom me into taking over the business when he's gone but he forgets about me, a good thing really, only remembering occasionally I exist. And giving me...presents or making me watch him kill people or telling me to make him and his...friends dinner." Bilbo explained in a horrifyingly matter of fact tone, the group would have been less horrified if Bilbo had been crying during his little speech, the calm tones over something so nasty were...unsettling.

It was like Bilbo accepted his life here because he didn't know different.

"So how, how long have you been here?" Thorin asked when he managed to finally break the horrified silence.

"Umm, I think I'm fourteen now, maybe fifteen so about seven years? Six?" Bilbo said. Thorin scrubbed his face, Christ, Bilbo was only three years younger than him (two years younger than Fili, Kili and Ori) and he had spent years in captivity, isolated from other people, Thorin didn't count anyone working for Bolg as people.

Bilbo had spent years living with individuals who were classed violent and dangerous, sadistic people who were more than slightly unhinged.

Bilbo was only a Freshman, he would be going in as a Sophomore when Thorin went in as a Senior.

"Is-is there something wrong?" Bilbo asked seeing their dismayed faces.

"We're just sad you didn't get to grow up normally, with parents and go to school." Balin said gently.

"Oh." Biblo said then he brightened. "But if I wasn't here then I would never have met you all and then where would you be? No way to escape and no insider information." Bilbo said thrilled to be useful to them.

Thorin swallowed painfully.

He was not the only one.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo brought a rucksack filled with food and several water bottles when he visited next. He was also sporting a rather vivid bruise on his cheekbone.

"Who did that?" Thorin asked tightly, lightly touching the bruise.

"Shelob." Bilbo said simply not looking at all perturbed by the painful bruise.

"Why?" Thorin growled. Bilbo looked at him curiously head tilting to one side not understanding why Thorin seemed so cross.

"Everyone gets cross sometimes, Thorin, and I did spill some water." Bilbo said.

"Bilbo, you do know it's not right for them to hit you, it's not right for anyone to hit you, don't you?" Bofur asked softly.

"It isn't? But everyone gets angry..." Bilbo said bewildered.

"Doesn't mean they should hit you. What do you do when you get cross?" Bofur continued seeing that Bilbo didn't get his point.

"I go to my room and read or if I'm really cross I'll throw my pillow across the room." Bilbo said frowning. Bofur nodded.

"Why don't you punch anyone then?"

"Because just because I'm angry doesn't mean I should hurt someone else." Bilbo said adamantly. "Oh." Bilbo said when he got Bofur's point.

The next day Bilbo turned up wringing his hands in agitation and for once not clutching a book. They gasped when they saw the bruises on Bilbo's throat.

"What happened?" Kili asked aghast. Bilbo frowned hands still trembling.

"I told Sauron that he shouldn't hit me when he's angry because it's not right to hit people and he laughed at me crossly before hitting me again then trying to strangle me. Then, then he burnt my book!" Bilbo exclaimed sounding far more concerned with his burnt book than his bruised throat, hoarse from the strangling.

Balin frowned looking at the small burn marks littered across Bilbo's hands.

Ori drew Bilbo in for a hug while Bofur looked absolutely horrified his well meant advice had gotten his friend hurt.

"What book was it?" Gloin asked.

"Birdsong by Sebastian Faulks." Bilbo answered voice muffled by Ori's knitted jumper.

"Well, we'll get you a new copy when we get home." Gloin said pragmatically. Bilbo beamed, hands no longer trembling.

* * *

xxx

It was time! Today was the day they were escaping. And Bolg had been tied up with some problems the entire time so they hadn't been tortured or tormented apart from once when Smaug had entered the basement and spoken at great length about what he was going to do to them and how much pain they would be in. He had even brought Bilbo in and made him listen as well.

Thorin was more shocked by Bilbo's blank face, this obviously wasn't the first time this had happened and not the first time Bilbo, someone so inherently good and nice, had had to listen to such atrocities.

They were waiting impatiently in the basement for Bilbo.

"Where is he?" Dwalin asked rhetorically, Bilbo was twenty minutes late.

"What if something's happened to him?" Ori said fearfully wringing his hands worried about Bilbo.

A slight noise came from the door and Thorin turned to find Bilbo standing there looking flushed and pleased with himself holding his self made lock picks (a hairpin broken in half) carefully. Bilbo also had a collection of new bruises and seemed to be favouring his left side.

"Sorry I'm late; Bolg left some house sitters this time so I had a little trouble tying them up." Bilbo said wearing a small rucksack that looked chock a block full of books.

Thorin stood stock still in the longue area staring in undisguised shock. There were nine bodies all tied up in various knots and all unconscious.

"What happened?" Thorin asked in a strangled tone. Bilbo poked one of the black clad figures with his toe sniffing when the person didn't move.

"Well, Bolg for once left people here; I think it was because you were in the basement. Anyway we wouldn't be able to leave without them stopping us so I put a sedative in their food, only two didn't eat so I knocked them out and tied them up. That's why I was so late, I had to read a book on how to tie different knots so I would sure they couldn't escape, Bolg's spiders are rather tricky people." Bilbo explained carefully shutting a large book on different knots and putting it gently on the table.

"You knocked them out?! How?" Dwalin asked incredulously eyeing Bilbo's slight form.

"Well I sang a song that infuriated them, teasing them when they couldn't catch me and one by one knocked them unconscious, I didn't know cooking essentials could be so useful outside of cooking, I knocked them out using a frying pan!" Bilbo said cheerfully all the while searching the tied up people's pockets confiscating any mobile phones and any money before distributing it around to various members of the group, just in case.

Dwalin choked.

"A frying pan?!" Kili whimpered.

Bilbo nodded sagely. "I know, I thought a rolling pin would be more effective but the frying pan worked."

Bofur grinned. "You're certainly someone I'd like around in a pinch."

Bilbo frowned. "You're being pinched?" He asked concerned not having really listened, he as too focused looking around what had been his home for nearly half his life. All Bofur could do was guffaw. Even Ori chuckled.

Bilbo coughed. "Anyway, I looked through some maps; this house is pretty isolated so it will take us a few hours to get to the nearest police station. I have a map and a compass so we should be there before breakfast time. Has someone got the bag with water and food in?" Bilbo asked and when Dwalin nodded hefting the pack Bilbo nodded strolling out of the front door as though he had no care in the world, like had hadn't just taken down nine agents of Bolg's network.

Bilbo was pretty good at navigating and even never having used a map before managed to steer them in the correct direction and they found the police station after only seven hours of walking. Bilbo seemed pleased with himself.

Thorin hugged him tightly. "You are amazing." Thorin breathed relieved they had made it; he hadn't expected them to survive the kidnapping with Bolg let alone actually escaping. They entered the police station.

* * *

xxx

Chief of Police Elrond Imladris had sorted everything out quickly and the Companies parents had been ecstatic they were safe and sound. Apparently Bolg had been shot in a shoot out three hours ago and was not expected to survive. He had been fighting with the Fellowship for the past few weeks which was why he had been so distracted from Thorin and his friends.

Elrond however had distressing news for them, as Bilbo had no suitable guardians he would have to go into a care home. The Company weren't best pleased to put it mildly, they weren't going to leave Bilbo to fend for himself, the boy was hardly able to interact with people properly and he was part of their Company.

And all of them had at least an inkling of what Bilbo had suffered in Bolg's house over the years.

Half an hour later when Thorin was still arguing with Elrond an odd man dressed entirely in grey appeared saying he could look after Bilbo. Apparently he had been searching for him for years; Gandalf was a friend of Bilbo's mother, Belladonna. And 'coincidently' Gandalf had a house near enough that Bilbo could attend the same High School as the Company. Thorin eyed the man suspiciously, he didn't believe in coincidences. And he did not want Bilbo to go somewhere that wouldn't be good for him.

Thorin later found out that Gandalf had brought the house when he was on his way to the Police Station, sometime after he had re-discovered Bilbo.

Thorin didn't want to know what sort of job Gandalf did that meant he knew the Company and Bilbo were in the Police Station only twenty minutes after their arrival. But he found he trusted Gandalf with Bilbo's safety.

* * *

xxx

After:

The Company searched the school worriedly, Bilbo hadn't met them at the gates like he was supposed to, it was quarter of an hour later than he usually met them.

They eventually found him leaving a janitors closet, curls mussed, tie undone and a couple of buttons missing from his shirt. Dwalin barked a laugh when he looked into the closet to see Bill, Tom and Bert the High School bullies sitting on the ground tied up and gagged looking much more ruffled than Bilbo. Dwalin gently cuffed Bilbo on the head.

"We shouldn't have worried." Was all he said walking out and letting the others witness Bilbo's work.

They had all made Bilbo attend self defence lessons and had all pitched in to help him learn various fighting manoeuvres, they weren't going to leave Bilbo defenceless.

Bilbo didn't even want to argue, it was nice having friends, people concerned with your welfare and Gandalf was a nice guardian, he let Bilbo do what he wanted and he sometimes cooked so Bilbo didn't have to! Also, and much more importantly in Bilbo's list of priorities, Gandalf brought him books and even let him choose some from the shop!

* * *

xxx

So yes, Bilbo wasn't to be messed with but it wasn't because he hung out with thirteen strong looking (almost) men like most believed, it was because Bilbo was perfectly able to subdue those twice his size.

Thorin (and the others) did have to protect him from himself sometimes, and it wasn't rare for them to have to explain a social norm or two (or ten) to Bilbo. That no, Bilbo couldn't live in the library, that in rugby you're supposed to tackle them not tickle them even if it works and is less violent, that yes, people would tease him for bringing half finished crochet into school to do during break time, that he wasn't allowed to touch the fire, that WWI and WWII were actual wars not just a story, that no, you can't remove the cast because you've run out of space to draw on it- it's there to set your bone back in place etc.

* * *

xxx

It was an odd experience telling Bilbo that no, he didn't have to accept Thorin's date unless he wanted to. The Company had confused Bilbo terribly before Thorin stepped in.

"Bilbo, you can say no to the date, only say yes if you want to come out with me for a meal and to watch a film." Thorin stated seriously.

"Why wouldn't I want to spend time with you, you're my friend?" Bilbo replied tilting his head to the side like he did when people didn't make sense to him.

"I'm asking you romantically, so if you don't want to date me say and we'll just be friends." Thorin explained patiently, three years of knowing Bilbo having taught him patience was for the best and that Bilbo would get it sooner rather than later. Bilbo frowned looking lost.

"I-I don't know. You're my friend." Bilbo stated unsurely, even years after leaving Bolg's grasp Bilbo was still emotionally challenged, he didn't understand or recognise certain emotions and at other times his responses were not appropriate. Thorin nodded, Bilbo was sometimes incredibly childlike but normally he acted older than his age.

"Well, if you want we could try dating and if at any time you feel like it isn't what you want we call it off, we'll still be friends whatever happens." Thorin stated Bilbo nodded agreeably. The date went well and Bilbo agreed to another one, nothing seemed changed apart from the fact Thorin would ask him out for dinner, to see a movie, to the zoo etc.

It wasn't till after their fifth 'date' (which were more like the friendly outings the Company usually went on only just Bilbo and Thorin) that Thorin asked if he could kiss Bilbo, Bilbo nodded, still not quite sure what this dating thing meant. Oh he knew what dating was, he understood the mechanics behind it he just didn't get the motivation.

Thorin slowly and gently pressed a lingering chaste kiss against Bilbo's lips. Bilbo gently felt his lips smiling slightly. "Did you like it?" Thorin asked.

"It felt nice; it made my lips tingle and my belly warm. Is that good?" Bilbo asked Thorin smiled.

"Only if you think it is good." Thorin stated seriously before ducking his head and kissing Bilbo again lightly licking at Bilbo's lips and when Bilbo gasped at the feeling Thorin slowly licked his way into Bilbo's mouth, tongue mapping out the honey sweet cavern before pulling away slowly.

Bilbo had a flush high across his cheekbones, eyes bright and lips slightly parted. Thorin groaned but didn't initiate any more kisses.

"Did you like that?" Thorin asked, he would stop if Bilbo was uncomfortable with anything or if he just didn't want to.

Bilbo again touched his lips with a curious finger. "It made my heart beat quickly, like when I'm afraid but I wasn't scared, it made me tingly, I liked it." Bilbo decided.

"Good." Thorin said kissing Bilbo one last time, just a gentle press of the lips.

* * *

X

High School:

9th Grade – Freshman Year, starting at 14 to 15 years of age

10th Grade – Sophomore Year, starting at 15 to 16 years of age

11th Grade – Junior Year, starting at 16 to 17 years of age

12th Grade – Senior Year, starting at 17 to 18 years of age.


	3. Chapter 3 Time Travel

Disclaimer.

Warnings: Um... Slash. Human Hobbit characters. Bilbo/Thorin

10. Time Travel -Time travellers wife theme.

* * *

(Bilbo Baggins is seven years old and Thorin Durin is 35.)

The first time it happened Bilbo was seven.

Bilbo often played by the Brandywine river, taking books and paper and pens with him. No one else ever came to Bilbo's special spot as it was hidden by the reeds and there weren't many houses around the area anyway. And as long as he was back by seven and not dirty Lobelia and Otho didn't care.

Like any other day Bilbo sat down putting his small bag down and taking off his shoes so he could dip his feet in the water while reading. Suddenly a curse rang out and Bilbo blushed, well aware that repeating _those_ words would end up with his mouth being washed with soap and no dinner for him.

Bilbo peered through the reeds to where the sound was coming from unable to see the man.

"Bilbo?" The voice called out. "Bilbo?" The voice called again. It was a deep voice, deeper than Otho's and deeper than Bungo, Bilbo's father, had been before he had his accident.

"Who is there?" Bilbo called out suspiciously when the man seemed to be moving closer to Bilbo's spot. Bilbo heard the man inhale sharply with a surprised exclamation and he stiffened again.

"A friend." The man called out. Bilbo frowned, he only had two friends and that was Bofur and Gloin who were both Bilbo's age. Bilbo picked up his shoes, one in each hand.

"I'm not supposed to talk to strangers...mother said so." Bilbo replied. His mother, who roamed the world even more so now her husband was dead, had told him that when Bilbo last saw her. She visited less frequently now, leaving him in the care of Lobelia and her husband.

Lobelia had always looked after Bilbo, as had Bilbo's father but Belladonna was a distant mother, giving warm cuddles and telling exciting stories when around but not often enough around for her and Bilbo to bond, she smelt exotic. Lobelia was crotchety but fair and sometimes nice to Bilbo, Bilbo liked the way she gave out back handed compliments, it made him laugh. Lobelia didn't like Belladonna but that was okay as Bilbo didn't know Belladonna.

"Wise advice." The man called out. "But I'm not a stranger, I'm a friend."

Bilbo frowned, the man was lying, he sounded like no one Bilbo had ever met before. Bilbo quickly chucked his shoe in the direction of the voice. A muffled yelp told him his aim had been true and he hefted his other shoe.

"Bilbo Baggins, Birthday on the 22nd September, born to Belladonna Took and Bungo Baggins. Lives in Bag End with Lobelia, you come down here a lot just to read and draw. And your favourite colour is green, it was yellow for a while but you prefer green now." The man said quickly. Bilbo frowned.

"How did you know that?" Bilbo asked.

"Like I said I'm a friend."

"Why don't you come out from behind the reeds?" Bilbo asked still not putting down his shoe.

"Because I'm naked."

Bilbo blushed and picked up the towel he sat on so as not to get grass stains on his clothes, Lobelia didn't like grass stains on his clothes. He carefully chucked it in the man's voice direction.

"There, now will you come out?" Bilbo said ready to run if the man did anything odd. His sports teacher, Dwalin Fundinson, said that if they ever got cornered by someone odd or frightening then they should scream real loud, poke their eyes or twist their ears or punch them between the legs and then run away.

Bilbo stepped back as a tall (everyone was taller than Bilbo apart from the babies) and broad man walked forward. The man stopped two meters away from Bilbo and sat down, the towel covering his modesty but it still revealed powerful shoulders and a muscled torso. The man had longish black hair and blue eyes.

"Your eyes are a nice colour." Bilbo said. "They look like the sky before night." Bilbo continued still eyeing the man cautiously. The man stared at him incredulously for a few seconds before bursting into loud laughter. Bilbo jumped shoe still clutched in his hand.

"You have blood on your mouth." Bilbo commented unsmilingly still looking wary.

"That's because you threw and shoe at me. Here." The man handed out Bilbo's shoe passing it to him. "My name is Thorin." The man, Thorin, said.

"How did you know that about me?" Bilbo asked referring to the sentence Thorin had spoken saying Bilbo's birthday, parents and favourite colour.

"Can you keep a secret?" Thorin asked. Bilbo nodded, he had kept the secret when Dwalin told him that he was secretly slightly afraid of his brother, Balin, despite the fact Balin was much smaller and less strong than Dwalin, Dwalin had told him that when Bilbo complained of being too small.

"Well I'm a time traveller and I know you in the future. We're married and you still adore chocolate ice cream with raspberries and nuts." Thorin said.

Bilbo frowned. "I don't think that can be true." Bilbo said unsurely. "Why did you have no clothes?" Bilbo asked curiously.

"Well, when I time travel I can't take anything with me, clothes, money or food. Do you have any food?" Thorin asked.

Bilbo chucked over a slightly squashed cake bar Lobelia had put in his pocket for a snack.

* * *

xxx

Thorin cursed. One moment he was in bed, sleeping next to his husband and the next he was outside, stark naked in the late afternoon in what appeared to be Bilbo's reading spot on the bank of the Brandywine. The time travel, as always, was involuntary. Thorin was pulled to different times in his past (or not his past) for seemingly no reason. There were two places he was pulled to with any frequency, here and the accident.

"Bilbo?" Thorin called out pausing when no reply came. "Bilbo?" Thorin called again. Thorin frowned; maybe it was a time before Bilbo knew him and met him at the spot with clothes and some food.

"Who is there?" A small piping voice called. Thorin stiffened and breathed in sharply, was this the day Bilbo had first met him?

"A friend." Thorin called out not wanting to alarm Bilbo.

"I'm not supposed to talk to strangers...mother said so." Bilbo replied. Thorin frowned, he knew for a fact Bilbo's mother stopped visiting when Bilbo turned eight so that meant Bilbo was under the age of eight, he wracked his brains, what did Bilbo tell him when Thorin first met Bilbo? Seven! Bilbo was seven.

"Wise advice. But I'm not a stranger, I'm a friend." Thorin assured, Thorin had never met Belladonna and Bilbo didn't have much to say about her. She sent a present when Bilbo told her they were getting married but she hadn't bothered coming for the wedding small as it was.

Thorin yelped in pain as a shoe hit him in the mouth. Thorin grinned then grimaced. Bilbo was able to hold his own pretty well but he just hit him with a shoe!

"Bilbo Baggins, Birthday on the 22nd September, born to Belladonna Took and Bungo Baggins. Lives in Bag End with Lobelia, you come down here a lot just to read and draw. And your favourite colour is green, it was yellow for a while but you prefer green now." Thorin said not eager to be hit again although he couldn't blame Bilbo.

"How did you know that?" Bilbo asked hidden from Thorin's view.

"Like I said I'm a friend."

"Why don't you come out from behind the reeds?"

"Because I'm naked." Thorin answered unashamed, he had gotten used to time travelling and so used to the nudity that followed. A towel suddenly appeared where the shoe had been thrown from.

"There, now will you come out?" Bilbo asked. Thorin quickly tied the towel, an orange and yellow monstrosity. He sat down carefully, not close enough to scare Bilbo and studied the younger version of his husband. Bilbo was a small child (and a small man) and now all Thorin could see was curly blond hair, big honey eyes and a scrawny body, all elbows and knees.

"Your eyes are a nice colour. They look like the sky before night." Bilbo said after his own study of Thorin. Thorin stared before bursting into laughter; that was near exactly the same thing Bilbo had said to him when Thorin first met boy who had grown up knowing Thorin's older self.

"You have blood on your mouth." Bilbo commented unsmilingly still looking wary. Bilbo was a serious child.

"That's because you threw and shoe at me. Here." Thorin gave back Bilbo's shoe. "My name is Thorin."

"How did you know that about me?" Bilbo asked referring to the sentence Thorin had spoken saying Bilbo's birthday, parents and favourite colour. Thorin eyed the wary boy in front of him not knowing this version, was this what it was like for Bilbo when Bilbo had found Thorin's younger self, the Thorin that had never met Bilbo?

"Can you keep a secret?" Thorin asked watching Bilbo frown in thought then nod seriously.

"Well I'm a time traveller and I know you in the future. We're married and you still adore chocolate ice cream with raspberries and nuts." Thorin said smiling.

Bilbo frowned. "I don't think that can be true. Why did you have no clothes?"

"Well, when I time travel I can't take anything with me, clothes, money or food. Do you have any food?" How Thorin wished that wasn't the case. One moment Thorin would be brushing his teeth in his pyjamas, in bed with his husband, at work the next he would be skidding along a carpet butt naked and hurling, in a crowded market place, naked, surrounded by people or visiting himself, his younger self, still naked. He was just glad that he hadn't ever popped into a lift or an enclosed space. What would people do if a man suddenly appeared in front of them completely starker's and there was no place for Thorin to run?

Thorin devoured the cake bar swiftly; time travelling took it out of you. A giggle made him raise a curious eyebrow.

"You eat like a dog." Bilbo commented sitting down as well finally looking a little less wary.

"No I don't." Thorin argued slightly discomforted. "What are you reading?" Thorin asked nodding towards the discarded book. Bilbo noticing the look grabbed his book smoothing down the rumpled pages.

"The Wind in the Willows." Bilbo answered grinning. "Toad reminds me of Bofur." Bilbo said with a conspiratorial grin. Thorin smiled back, Bofur was still one of Bilbo's closest friends. Bofur didn't like Thorin very much; he thought Thorin was no good for Bilbo. It had taken a while for Bofur to finally trust him with Bilbo.

"Listen, Bilbo, I will travel here again soon. In two days time around six in the evening. Can you bring me some clothes and maybe some food and meet me then?" Thorin asked not knowing when he might get sucked back to his timeline. Bilbo looked hesitant and disbelieving, he didn't believe in time travel. Thorin stayed where he was, Bilbo had said the thing that made him believe Thorin was the fact Thorin disappeared right in front of his eyes.

Thorin felt the beginnings of the time travel grip him. "Remember two days time, food and clothes." Thorin said before blinking out of existence. Thorin gasped as he landed on top of Bilbo in their bed. Bilbo's eyes snapped open in shock at the sudden heavy weight before they crinkled in a warm smile.

"Hello." Bilbo mumbled covering a yawn with his hand. Thorin smiled, happy to see his husband, not the boy his husband used to be. "So where were you this time?" Bilbo asked curiously all the while sliding his hands over Thorin's still bare chest. Thorin groaned at the sensual caress eye lids closing as Bilbo gently rolled his nipples with his fingers.

"The first time you met me." Thorin answered his own hands sneaking under the quilt and divesting Bilbo of his own pyjama shirt.

"Hmmm." Bilbo said more focussed on toying with the hair on Thorin's chest.

"You threw a shoe at me." Thorin complained teasingly as a hand snuck down the back of Bilbo's pyjama bottoms. Bilbo frowned, obviously not remembering the whole encounter. And why should he? He was only seven at the time. Bilbo arched his back as a finger toyed with the muscle of his opening.

"Oh." Bilbo breathed in a far higher pitch than he intended before he sent a devious smirk in Thorin's direction and flipped them over. "Well I'd better apologise for that then." Bilbo said softly, sliding down Thorin's body.

* * *

xxx

(Bilbo is seven and Thorin is forty.)

Bilbo had a hard time concentrating the day Thorin was supposed to appear again. He couldn't keep his eyes off the clock.

He had managed to pilfer some of his dad's old clothes, his dressing up clothes or clothes used when Bilbo was in a school play. A light pink shirt, yellow corduroy trousers, a nice green knitted jumper, some trainers and a tie with ducks on.

Bilbo was distracted when he got home from school, unable to focus on his books or his spelling homework.

Finally when it was ten to six Bilbo hurriedly put on his coat and grabbed the bag of clothes he had packed. Bilbo wandered into the kitchen snagging an apple and with a second glance half a can of tuna that had been opened that day.

Bilbo waited by the River shivering slightly in the cool breeze the bag at his feet. Just as he was about to leave and go back to the house he heard a body hit the ground and a loud curse.

"Um...Thorin? I have the clothes here." Bilbo called out unsure.

"Pass them over here then." Thorin ordered. Bilbo frowned.

"You could say 'please'." Bilbo said passing over the bag filled with clothes. Thorin chuckled and murmured something like 'you never change' but Bilbo couldn't hear very clearly from where he was standing.

Thorin put the clothes on again thanking the fact that although Bungo was much shorter than Thorin he was wider so the clothes fit loosely but weren't too tight or too small. The shoes however, fit well. Thorin always found it funny how such a small man like Bungo had such large feet; Thorin's own feet were smaller for his height than most. Bilbo's feet were a little larger than you'd expect from his small stature but nothing close to Bungo's.

Thorin eyed the colours and withheld a snort. His husband really had an eye for colours. Pink, brown, green and was that ducks on the tie? Thorin didn't bother putting on the tie.

When he was dressed Bilbo handed him the apple and the tuna studying him as he ate. Thorin just thanked his stars that Bilbo could cook and cook well when he was older; Bilbo always gave him odd concoctions when he time travelled to the river.

"Do you have some paper, and a pen?" Thorin asked holding out a hand, Bilbo never went anywhere without paper and pens and Thorin didn't doubt it was a habit started when he was a child.

"Ask nicely." Bilbo said holding the pen and paper in one small hand. Thorin smothered a grin.

"Of course. Please may I use your paper and pen, my lord." Thorin said in a condescending tone.

"You may." Bilbo sniffed mockingly, handing over the writing tools. Thorin swiftly wrote down the list of times he would (or already had to him) time travelled to Bilbo's river spot. His older self had given Thorin the list to read and Thorin had promptly memorised it. He gave it back to Bilbo answering his unasked question.

"These are the times I will appear by the Brandywine." Thorin explained. Bilbo nodded then looked to his house.

"I told Bofur about you but he didn't believe me." Bilbo admitted biting his lip hoping he hadn't done something wrong by telling Bofur. Thorin smiled, Bofur knew and believed it before he and Bilbo had got married, Thorin had time travelled to Bilbo and Bofur was there as well a couple of times. Never when they were children though.

"Go on, you should get back before you're missed." Thorin urged gently." Bilbo nodded taking the now empty bag and rubbish away with him.

Thorin walked around for a while, chucking the duck tie into one of the bins in the street, before returning to the River and thinking, or brooding as Bilbo would say.

* * *

xxx

(Bilbo is 20 and Thorin 28)

Bilbo wandered about looking round at the books with interest.

He was in the library in the middle of town searching for some historical texts he needed for his research. Bilbo hummed softly walking along one row of shelves and onto another. Suddenly a tall strong figure with longish black hair caught Bilbo's attention.

"Thorin!" Bilbo called voice filled with relief and happiness momentarily forgetting he was in a library and supposed to be quiet. He hadn't seen Thorin for several months, since Bilbo left his home and the Brandywine River. Thorin had said he would meet him soon enough.

Thorin turned round at the sound of his name being called and looked at the small man who was smiling like Thorin was one person he lived and breathed for. Thorin withheld a frown, great, he didn't recognise this man but obviously the man knew him. Thorin looked over the small man.

He was well...small, with honey coloured curls and honey coloured eyes, a warm face, slight and he looked about twenty-ish. He looked so comely and warm, so nice that Thorin just wanted to bask in his bright aura.

Thorin blinked as the man grabbed onto his arm and dragged him to a corner out of the view of most people in the library.

"Your eyes remind me of the sky, I had forgotten how blue they are. I haven't seen you in a while but you said I'd meet you again soon but I didn't expect you to be so young." The man said quickly not taking his eyes off Thorin's face. Thorin blinked again completely blindsided.

This man knew his older self and was expecting to meet him. This had not happened before.

The man looked at his watch and frowned indignantly as if the watch had done something to personally offend him. "I've got to go; will you meet me for dinner? At Bombur's restaurant a few blocks away, at seven?" The man asked.

Thorin nodded, he wanted some answers and he would not have refused a dinner date with the man in front of him even if the man didn't know him. "As long as you tell me your name." Thorin said smiling a little as he caught the man's wrist before he left. The man flushed endearingly.

"Bilbo, my names Bilbo Baggins and I do believe that is the first time I have ever introduced myself to you." Bilbo said with a grin before near running out of the library glancing at his watch again.

Thorin looked at the state of his apartment, it was small with barely enough room to turn around, he kept bumping into the furniture, and it was absurdly expensive but Thorin had wanted to live here. Thorin looked at the mess, right, if it came to it don't bring Bilbo back to the apartment, Bilbo's would be best.

Thorin adjusted his tie and the lapels of his suit before deeming himself ready. He brought a small bouquet of flowers as well for Bilbo.

Thorin got to the restaurant and saw Bilbo inside waiting patiently reading a book. A sudden thought made Thorin step back before he entered the restaurant. What if he was something like a _father_ figure to Bilbo? Bilbo had mentioned that Thorin looked young. Good God, Thorin just hoped his morals hadn't slipped so much that he was a paedophile. Thorin swallowed back bile.

Thorin breathed calming down slightly, no that just didn't sound like him. Okay. Thorin breathed in and out before stepping into the restaurant.

Bilbo only noticed he was there when Thorin coughed politely. Bilbo smiled at him a tiny hint of relief in his face as he slowly closed the book a small book mark keeping his page. Thorin held out the flowers and sat down once Bilbo had taken them a slightly befuddled look on his face.

"You're not allergic are you?" Thorin asked seeing the confused expression. Bilbo shook his head with a smile.

"No, no. You've just never given me flowers before; I don't quite know what to do with them." Bilbo said. Thorin shrugged.

"It seemed like the thing to do." He explained, Bilbo grinned.

"Don't worry about it in the future; I much prefer your presence to a bunch of flowers. I don't even think I have a vase..." Bilbo frowned thinking.

In the lull of their conversation they ordered their drinks and dinner.

Bilbo coughed. "Right this is confusing. I can see why you never tell me much now...Um..." Bilbo blushed. "Well the last time I saw you I was trying to convince you to have sex with me and you were saying no, so this is a little awkward." Bilbo said with a grin the blush still evident. Thorin wondered how far the blush went down Bilbo's chest...

"When did you first meet me and when did you know what was going on?" Thorin asked after their starters had arrived.

"I met you for the first time when I was seven, I didn't believe you time travelled until I saw you disappear right in front of my eyes. You were older than you are now, grey streaks in your hair." Bilbo said wistfully. He knew about this Thorin's future but he didn't know about this Thorin. Just like Thorin's future self knew Bilbo but this Thorin had never met him before.

"You gave me a piece of paper listing all the times you time travelled to the Brandywine River, near my home." Bilbo said handing over said bit of paper. It was crumpled in places and looked a few years old (it was) but the writing was still readable and so clearly in Thorin's own bold hand.

"You told me we were married in my future and then asked for some food." Bilbo said. Thorin leaned back in his seat eyes wide staring at the man before him.

"C-could you slow down a little." Thorin eventually said still thrown by the revelation that he would eventually marry this man. Bilbo surveyed him with a teasing glint in his eyes.

"Now you know how I feel. Okay so is your favourite colour deep blue yet?" Bilbo asked with a grin that only widened as Thorin groaned and propped his head on the table.

"Cruel." Thorin said pointing at Bilbo.

"Ah, no that was when I was pestering your older self for sex; I may have been a bit cruel then. You can look forward to it." Bilbo said grinning with glee as Thorin emitted a strangled sound that may have been a whine. Bilbo chuckled before taking pity on the man.

"I didn't know your surname until today when it was listed on your badge." Bilbo commented granting Thorin a reprieve. Thorin Durin.

They walked out of the restaurant together. Thorin definitely appreciated the sight of Bilbo in his well fitted suit and from the glances he received Bilbo admired Thorin too. Once they got out of sight of the restaurant Bilbo wound Thorin's hair in his hand pulling Thorin down for a kiss that Thorin eagerly participated in.

"Where do you live?" Bilbo asked breathing slightly laboured as he nuzzled Thorin's face affectionately before placing teasing nibbling kisses down Thorin's jaw. Thorin shuddered at the sensation hands griping Bilbo's hips tightly.

"W-what about yours?" Thorin asked only just remembering the state of his own apartment.

"I share mine and he's there now." Bilbo answered.

"You sure we can't go to yours?" Thorin asked again already leading Bilbo in the direction to his apartment.

"Completely sure. Bofur said I wasn't allowed to bring anyone over unless they are just friends." Bilbo said with a grin of amusement.

"Alright. But you have to close your eyes and count to a thousand when we get there." Thorin conceded reluctantly.

Thorin undid his tie and wrapped it over Bilbo's eyes. "No peeking." Thorin warned before rushing round attempting to sort out his apartment.

"...nine-hundred and eighty-eight, nine-hundred and eighty-nine, nine-hundred and ninety, nine-hundred and ninety-one..." Bilbo stopped as the blindfold was undone and moved closer to Thorin.

"So, the bedroom?" Bilbo asked carding Thorin's hair through his hands and toying with the buttons on Thorin's shirt. Thorin groaned meshing their lips together and walking them to his bedroom.

Bilbo woke up the next morning a slight burning sensation in his backside and his muscles aching in a good way. Bilbo smiled when he saw Thorin crashed out beside him, they had had a rather energetic night after all.

Bilbo winced as he stood up and stretched. He walked round looking through the apartment curiously, laughing when he saw the kitchen. The kitchen had piles of everything and anything everywhere, clothes, books etc. So instead of tidying when Bilbo was blindfolded and counting last night Thorin had simply shoved everything in the kitchen.

Bilbo wandered on, he hoped Thorin didn't mind him using his toothbrush. Bilbo opened the bathroom cabinet and paused. There amongst the usual shampoos, shaving kit and scissors was some perfume, tampons and some lipstick. Bilbo plucked up the lipstick and eyes the vivid red colour a slight frown marring his features.

He had forgotten that it was Thorin's first time meeting him. Bilbo had spent his life knowing who he was going to marry; he had stupidly assumed Thorin did too. But Thorin only time travelled to visit Bilbo was after Thorin met Bilbo, so any age greater than twenty-eight.

Bilbo put the lipstick back, shaking his head. It didn't matter now; Bilbo was here and here to stay, he just didn't want Thorin to be cheating on anyone particularly.

Bilbo wandered into the kitchen eventually finding the coffee in the fridge and making a pot.

Bilbo brought two cups of strong black coffee into the bedroom just as Thorin was beginning to stir. Bilbo smiled and placed the coffee down straddling Thorin and kissing him languidly ignoring Thorin's morning breath.

Thorin frowned when he realised Bilbo had brushed his teeth (the taste of toothpaste a telling sign), so Bilbo had seen the bathroom.

"Do you mind?" Thorin asked seriously and curiously, he would have minded greatly in Bilbo's place. Bilbo sighed.

"I don't like the fact I've apparently made you cheat on your girlfriend." Bilbo offered.

"It was over anyway, nearly." Thorin said. "We were sort of off again on again but I wanted to end it. She's a bit..." Thorin stopped talking when a finger pressed against his lips.

"I don't want to hear about her. It doesn't matter." Bilbo smiled. "I'm sure there are better things we can do with our mouths." Bilbo said with a cheeky grin, laughing when Thorin groaned and rolled them over.


	4. Chapter 4 Hogwarts

Disclaimer.

Warning: Potterverse: Hobbit characters. Magical accident, slight (very slight) insanity. Slash Bilbo/Bifur

11. Hogwarts/Harry Potterverse

* * *

xxx

Bilbo Baggins had been a perfectly normal halfblood wizard child before the accident. His mother (a witch) and his father (muggle) loved him, he had friends he was always getting in trouble with and he was happy.

But Bilbo was a curious child and as the saying goes, curiosity killed the cat.

Sméagol, an occasional playmate of Bilbo's, had invited Bilbo round his house, along with their other friends. It was there that Bilbo found the ring. It was an innocuous type of thing, just a simple band of gold, but his father always said not to judge a book by its cover. Sméagol had seen it too and tried to snatch it from Bilbo, Bilbo said he would only give it to Sméagol if he said please.

They had then proceeded to argue, vehemently. And their accidental magic had...clashed. The ring, which had a rather nasty curse on it, had been destroyed in the magical backlash and with all the dangerous magic around as well as the ring and the nasty curse the room had been torn to shreds with two unconscious little boys lying in the middle of the wrecked room.

Both had survived, luckily, but it was a near miss.

Sméagol came away missing a finger, which despite all attempts could not be re-grown back and Bilbo was a little...odd from then on.

Bilbo no longer played with his friends, who wanted to play with the weirdo? But he didn't appear to mind that much.

"Bilbo dear, don't you want to play with your friends?" Belladonna asked worriedly one day as Bilbo contentedly sat reading a book...upside down. Bilbo smiled his dreamy smile, his curly hair hiding the scars he received from the accident.

"Would a fish want to play with an owl?" Bilbo replied in his soft dreamy way. Belladonna didn't quite know what to say to this but it seemed Bungo understood.

"Not unless the fish wished to be eaten." Bungo said to Bilbo with a sad smile. Bilbo's grin brightened and the dreaminess seemed to clear from his eyes for a few moments.

"Exactly. The trees look lonely." Bilbo said clearer with only an edge of the dreaminess usually infused in anything he said. Neither Belladonna nor Bungo knew quite what to say to that statement so they just sat quietly and Bilbo went back to his book the small smile never leaving his lips.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo looked around the train station, his small (even for an eleven year old) form swallowed up by everyone taller.

"Good luck dear." Belladonna said kissing Bilbo on the cheek. Bilbo, unlike most others his age didn't complain about his mother embarrassing him but smiled gently turning and embracing his mother.

"I'll be back soon enough." Bilbo said dreamily like always getting to the heart of the matter in his blunt but incredibly astute way. Belladonna swallowed holding onto Bungo's hand like a lifeline.

"Remember to write and tell us which house you get into." Bungo said clasping his suddenly all too fragile son close. Bilbo smiled softly.

"I can hold my own." Bilbo said piercing Bungo with his contrastingly innocent but knowing eyes. Bungo squeezed him tighter for a moment before he ruffled Bilbo's hair gently.

"I know." Bungo murmured but was drowned out by the train getting ready to depart. Belladonna quickly shooed Bilbo forward so he wouldn't miss the train but Bilbo walked just as calmly and serenely as he did when going to bed at night jumping on just as the train started moving.

Belladonna breathed out in both relief and sadness. Relief: because Bilbo had not missed the train and sadness: _because he hadn't missed the train_. Bungo gently steered Belladonna away once the train went out of view, the house would be even more silent without their sons quiet presence.

Bilbo drifted along the carriages only settling when he found an empty compartment where he stored his trunk and set free his owl. His owl was an odd tawny owl with one eye a darker shade than the other and a slightly crooked wing that didn't affect his flying, named Myrtle.

* * *

xxx

A few minutes later a boy, wearing robes with his house crest on, so obviously not a first year, entered the compartment with a grunt.

"I don't mind the company." Bilbo responded in his absent manner. The boy smiled, a rather scary baring of teeth to which Bilbo responded with a warm grin putting away the book he had been reading, upside down.

The boy grunted making another gesture as he sat down. Bilbo's eyes roved over the newcomer not even pausing to blink.

"Bifur, that trips nicely off the tongue. My name is Bilbo." Bilbo said mouthing the name Bifur again. Bifur seemed a little thrown by Bilbo but happily continued a conversation. What did it matter if this Bilbo kid seemed odd, Bifur himself was odd because he couldn't speak English anymore, he could understand it fine though. Bilbo seemed equally happy to speak to Bifur although it was a little hard to tell as Bilbo seemed to space out at times and other times he spoke of the oddest of things confusing Bifur terribly.

"See you around." Bilbo said drifting off with the other first years when the train stopped. Bifur nodded with a grunt.

"Why would I need luck? Hats are perfectly pleasant when they choose to be." Bilbo breathed already moving towards the boats ignoring the accidental jostling from other students. Bifur huffed in bemusement before walking towards the carriages.

* * *

xxx

Three years later:

Bilbo was quite happy in Ravenclaw and he was pleased to be starting his third year. Bifur was his friend and they did hang out at times, several hours every week. Somehow Bilbo always knew when Bifur was feeling frustrated over not being able to communicate easily with others and Bilbo always soothed him (unintentionally or not Bifur was never sure...). The only downside was the fact Bilbo's shoes had disappeared, again.

Bilbo hummed softly as he drifted through the halls. From his unconcerned manner you wouldn't guess him to be out after curfew but things like curfew never tended to faze Bilbo anyway.

He had found his spare cloak lurking inside a suit of armour; the armour seemed quite chuffed after Bilbo had politely thanked it for guarding his cloak.

Thorin looked around wary for any teachers patrolling the halls...or worse, caretaker Azog who seemed to have a dislike for Thorin, even greater than his dislike for the students in general. Thorin silently cursed his nephews (more like brothers) again. Why did they have to decide to visit the kitchens now?

Thorin heard sniggers and he crept carefully towards the sound. Suddenly he grabbed hold to the two boys gripping the top of their arms tightly. The shorter made a noise of protest as a cake dropped out of his hand when he startled and dropped it on the floor.

"Fili, Kili, why on earth are you out at this time of night?!" Thorin hissed louder than was really advisable. And sure enough the tell tale sounds of claws clicking on the stone floors and heavy footsteps met their ears. Thorin looked around hurriedly; he did not want to get caught by Azog and his small white mutt.

But to no avail, they were at a dead end and the only way out was past the person gaining on their hiding spot behind a suit of armour.

"Hello!" A soft voice said making Fili, Kili and Thorin whirl round in shock suppressing any exclamations of noise. There, where there had previously been a blank wall was a small opening and sitting right inside staring at them with dreamy eyes was Bilbo Baggins looking as though they had all previously agreed to meet here for a chat and a pot of tea. Thorin breathed out suppressing his instinct to glare at the small menace.

"You might want to join me in this delightful passage way." Bilbo said reminding them that Azog was not far away in his undemanding, always serene way.

Thorin was not allowed to be anything but polite to the small slip of a boy, Bifur had made that quite clear after Thorin had been rude to Bilbo, not that Bilbo had the decency to realise he was being insulted. Bilbo had responded to the rude insults with an infuriating smile and an absent comment about the clouds.

Tightening his lips Thorin followed Fili and Kili into the dark passage. Bilbo leaned out a little looking at the suit of armour. "If you don't mind..." Bilbo spoke mildly to the suit of armour. Much to Thorin's, Fili's and Kili's shock the suit of armour bowed gallantly before going off and distracting Azog, making a horrendously loud clanging noise. Bilbo closed the passage way with a whispered thanks and a gentle pat to the now wall.

Thorin did his best not to squirm under Bilbo's intense gaze; he could feel Fili and Kili fidgeting beside him under the oddly penetrating look too.

"Lovely night for a stroll." Bilbo said dreamily moving his gaze to the ceiling. Thorin stared at the boy, it was winter-so in the castle (and out) it was absolutely freezing, and on top of that there was a massive thunderstorm raging the battlements.

"What were you doing?" Thorin asked suspiciously. Bilbo hummed and just before Thorin got too impatient and again demanded answers Bilbo spoke.

"My cloak ran off again. I was searching for it; it always turns up in the end. I found the lovely suit of armour out there guarding it for me." Bilbo said smiling softly.

Thorin felt a small tingle of shame, Bilbo obviously meant someone had stolen and hidden his things again and he had got them out of trouble and all Thorin could do was disparage the boy, even if it was just in his own head. Thorin cuffed Kili on the head when he sniggered.

"Where are your shoes?" Fili asked looking down at Bilbo's feet which were bare. Bilbo wriggled his toes.

"Around." Bilbo answered vaguely.

"You should have at least put socks on, it's freezing!" Thorin said frowning at Bilbo's bare feet until Bilbo's warm chuckle drew his attention up.

"Magic swims around us, I'm warm enough. Don't worry about me, Oakenshield." Bilbo breathed. Thorin pushed down his slight embarrassment, he was not worrying!

"How did you know that name?" Thorin asked sharply, only his very close friends and family knew of that name and the story behind it. Bilbo looked confused at his question.

"It is your title is it not?" Bilbo asked a frown marring his smooth forehead.

"Did Bifur tell you?" Thorin growled. Bilbo's frown deepened.

"Bifur never mentioned it, he didn't need to. It sings around you." Bilbo said drifting down the hallway, the conversation no longer holding his attention. Thorin turned to see his nephews looking just as baffled as he.

* * *

xxx

This happened again over the course of the year, Bilbo tended to be in the right place at the right time for no apparent reason. And Thorin began tolerating the little third year's odd ways.

He had thought Bilbo a coward for not standing up for himself when people stole his things and stashed them round the castle but it wasn't cowardliness that stilled Bilbo's tongue or fists. It was acceptance, a serene understanding that yes, his things were stolen as a nasty practical joke but the castle always made sure they were found in time. When Bilbo was asked if he minded it his reply was infuriatingly confusing but telling.

"Why would I mind? It always returns and it means I get to explore the castle, she does so love to talk."

Even so it didn't seem that Bilbo minded when less of his things were stolen and hidden after it became known he was part of Thorin's Company. He was friendly with all of them.

Dori mothered him, Nori stole his things back, Ori discussed books with him, Bofur joked around with him even though Bilbo didn't get many of the crude jokes, Bombur quietly chatted or sat in silence with him, Fili and Kili dragged him into trouble and Bilbo always got them out of it, Gloin rambled on about his favourite class eager to have a polite audience and attempting to answer Bilbo's obscure but difficult questions and Dwalin and Bilbo discussed different duelling tactics, Bilbo was surprisingly good using odd spells that were normally used for making clothes (or something just as obscure) to win the duel.

Oin was the healer in the school and so Bilbo saw him regularly for his check ups along with Bifur who had to collect some potions. And Balin, the history professor, was kind, always willing to lend an ear or answer questions from the polite and quiet lad.

Thorin and Bilbo often sat in silence when they 'hung out' together, Thorin brooding and Bilbo staring at the ceiling or the floor or a tapestry or a wall or...you get the picture, like it was unravelling the world's secrets.

"It's nice having friends." Bilbo commented out of the blue one day. Thorin swallowed, well that wasn't a heart rending statement. Thorin tended to use sarcasm a lot in his own mind.

"You're painfully blunt." Thorin said in return. Bilbo stared at his hands uncomprehendingly.

"No, I'm not. Are you sure your eyes are working properly? I'm human shaped and my skin is normal skin and I am not in pain. Are you in pain?" Bilbo replied a slight frown scrunching his forehead. Thorin barked a laugh wrapping an arm around Bilbo's shoulder and ruffling his hair much like he did with his nephews although slightly gentler.

Bilbo poked Thorin in the side. "See not blunt." Bilbo said attempting to prove his point. Thorin just laughed harder.

* * *

xxx

Thorin looked around at the group of friends with content. It was relaxing (most of the time) being around people he trusted and people he genuinely liked, they helped with the stress of being a sixth year at Hogwarts. Although Bofur, Bilbo, Ori, Fili and Kili were all fifth years. Thorin had attempted to help their studying for their OWLs, it hadn't gone so well.

Thorin frowned there was one missing.

"Bifur." Thorin called. Bifur looked up and came over shutting his book as he did so. "Do you know where Bilbo is?" Thorin asked. Bifur always knew where Bilbo was just as Bilbo always knew where Bifur was. (Bilbo was rather uncannily good at finding anyone and anything at anytime.)

Bifur grunted and a flurry of hand signals was Thorin's answer. Thorin watched the hand signals trying to translate not for the first time envying Bilbo's ability to know what Bifur said with just a glance of his expression and the grunts Bifur talked with. The whole group had learned sign language, an ingenious muggle idea that Bilbo had suggested. When Bilbo had explained what it was Bifur had hugged him tightly and not let go for hours.

"The forest? What forest...You don't mean the forbidden forest?!" Thorin yelled looking incensed and incredibly worried.

Bifur frowned punctuating his grunts with sharp hand gestures but Thorin (and the rest of the group) was already moving not noticing what Bifur was saying. Bifur sighed and followed, Bilbo wouldn't like it if they startled them being as noisy as they were.

Bifur came to the edge of the clearing where they sometimes had care of magical creatures, it was only just inside the forest but his friends were already looking discomfited. Bifur rolled his eyes and stood in front of them gesturing with emphasis as he halted their path.

"Be quiet? What do you mean we'll startle them? Bifur..." But Bifur had already gone on footsteps light as he came onto the clearing.

There, in the middle, was Bilbo sitting calmly and talking softly to the baby Thestral that had claimed his lap while the mother looked on appeased by the large chunk of raw meat Bilbo gave her.

Unfortunately, everyone in the group could see Thestrals. They had all seen someone die.

They stayed still just watching gobsmacked, some of them had only learnt about Thestrals this year after someone asked what charms and spells pulled the carriages along. Bifur however, moved forward sitting near to Bilbo but not close enough for the mother to worry too much for her foal.

More Thestrals came out from the trees as Bilbo and Bifur sat there and Bilbo handed Bifur a large chunk of raw meat with a dazzling smile. Bifur blinked, Bilbo was sitting with bits of twig and dirt on his face and hair, his jumper a soft knitted green (made for him by Ori and was the one of the few things that, strangely, never disappeared) with muddy elbows and jeans with a small tear at the knee, also muddy, bare feet with wiggling toes searching the ground. Bifur smiled, Bilbo seemed so at home here, in the Forbidden forest, all wild and untameable, untouchable, a free being just calmly sitting with creatures from the forest.

Bilbo was so unashamedly himself, it could be startling but it was also freeing in a weird way and sometimes Bifur just couldn't tear his eyes away.

An impatient nibble to the meat Bifur held in his hand brought him back to reality only to find he was surrounded by three adult Thestrals all vying for the meat he held in his hand. Bifur barked a dry, rough laugh, he was joined a few seconds later by soft tinkling laughter and Bifur listened entranced throwing the meat a few meters away and ducking as one of the Thestrals leapt over him in order to get to the meat.

Bifur watched as the foal stood on trembling spindly legs and walked sloppily over to its mother. Bifur scooted closer to Bilbo their sides touching as they watched the Thestrals. It was incredibly soothing, Bifur thought snatching glances at Bilbo every now and then.

It was almost like when he and the others chucked food across the table in the Great Hall and tossed the knives, forks and dishes around. Bifur grinned; the resulting detentions were so worth it.

Bifur was surprised, when he finally remembered that he hadn't come alone, to see that the rest of the group had disappeared not even bothering to enter the clearing.

* * *

xxx

Bifur often followed Bilbo when he went to the Forbidden forest and he didn't notice the smiles sent his and Bilbo's way nor the money being passed back and forth.

It was their last day of Hogwarts for the year, and next year would be Bifur's last. Bifur was sitting in the clearing with Bilbo, no Thestrals around this time just basking in the silence and the company.

Eventually they had to get up, they were supposed to attend the leaving feast after all and Bifur helped Bilbo to stand brushing off his clothes for him when it seemed Bilbo was off in his head again. It happened less when Bilbo was around Bifur or even the others but Bilbo sometimes lost himself in his own mind only to come to hours later and wonder where all the time had gone. Bifur always patiently waited them out, it worried him, Bilbo going where he couldn't follow but Bifur always waited and Bilbo always came back to him with a slow but warm smile.

Bifur shook out his coat that they had been sitting on and placed it on Bilbo's shoulders, the evening was cool and Bilbo had only come out in a t-shirt and jeans (no shoes). A sudden touch on his face got his attention and Bifur realised Bilbo had come back to himself. He raised an eyebrow in question as Bilbo's hand cupped his face. His eyes widened in shock as he was tugged down by his hair and soft (so soft) warm lips were pressed against his own.

The kiss was little more than lips pressed against lips, chaste even, but Bifur felt sparks fly through his body and he chased the feeling back when the lips moved away.

This kiss was different, their lips were moving, the strange tingles deepening and Bifur gently traced the seam of Bilbo's lips with a curious questing tongue. Bilbo gasped with a slight moan and Bifur used this to gently (always gently) stroke his way into Bilbo's mouth mapping it out. Bifur clasped Bilbo to him with care, arms barely constraining against Bilbo's slight torso.

Bifur stepped away as Bilbo moaned a small broken sound. Bilbo stumbled after him not wanting to lose the nice warmth, and the thrilling heat. Bilbo looked up at Bifur one hand curiously touching his lips. Bilbo smiled and wrapped his arm around Bifur's gently placing one last chaste kiss on Bifur's lips before leading them away and back to the castle.

"Come on, we might be in time for pudding." Bilbo breathed, arm still linked with Bifur's. And Bifur smiled, he couldn't wait till the beginning of school next year.

This time he did notice the exchange of coins as Bilbo and Bifur entered the hall, late and arms linked, he glowered but couldn't keep a smile off his face.


	5. Chapter 5 Homeless

Disclaimer.

12. Runaways/Homeless - Boudicca.

Warnings: Very Dark! Blood, Gore, torture, non descriptive Non-Con. Slash Bilbo/Dwalin. Human au.

Based on real events and books by Manda Scott chronicling Boudicca's life in a wonderful (but painful) story.

Bilbo tightened his lips, the lips themselves raw and cracked from him biting them willing himself not to scream. He would not give these...Romans the satisfaction of hearing him scream.

He was part of the furious resistance waged against the Roman occupation of Britain. They had no right to tear apart Bilbo's homeland, their homeland. They had no right to make them homeless.

xxx

It was only down to Bilbo's wandering nature that Bilbo was still alive, otherwise he would have burned with the rest of his tribe.

Bilbo had come home one day only to find the dwelling he shared with the other men his age ashes on the ground and glimpses of charred flesh. He had rushed to his parent's small hut only to find it too burnt to a crisp, his mother's torc, a sign of her right to rule over their tribe, on the ground hidden by ashes. Hearing voices and armour chinking Bilbo had swept up the torc and ran.

He had nursed a violent hatred towards those who had stolen everything from him.

He hid at the edges of Roman camps flitting about, slitting the throats of the unwary then disappearing before he was noticed. He earned a moniker 'Sting', for his brutal acts of murder, after slitting their throats he cut their bollocks off and stuffed them into the victims mouth, it gave him a vicious sort of satisfaction.

He was especially brutal whenever he managed to rescue the children, some of them irreparably damaged; Roman soldiers raped the children and adults indiscriminately. It was sickening.

Bilbo only ripped the bollocks off men when they were still alive if they had taken part in rape of their prisoners, the others he killed first.

It was during one of his stake out of the camps that he caught on an essential conversation. Bilbo had nearly shouted in exaltation when he heard but luckily he managed to stifle the urge. There was a resistance, a major one led by a woman named Boudicca. Bilbo nearly snorted, didn't the foolish Romans realise that Boudicca was a moniker, it meant 'bringer of victory', it was a title not a name.

He listened to some more stepping forward so he could catch everything. Bilbo froze as a twig snapped under his foot and as the Romans sitting by the fire went to look in the bushes there was no sign Bilbo had ever been there.

Bilbo ran, he was fleet of foot an excellent scout and messenger. He had been such once, with his quick brain and nearly as swift feet he was the perfect person to carry diplomatic messages from one tribe to another.

It took him eight days of running before he came to the encampment. His jaw dropped, it was massive, larger than he had ever imagined. And, for the first time since he had seen his home turn to dust, Bilbo felt hope stirring in his heart. It was this, this distraction that cost him.

Bilbo struggled instinctively as he was caught, bound in strong arms covered in thick muscle. Bilbo struggled like an eel, kicking, hissing and biting ferociously. He soon landed a lucky kick to the man's groin and he jumped away his knives drawn and ready in his hands. Bilbo spat at the ground enraged he had let his guard down so badly. His father and mother had both taught him better.

"I'd rip your bollocks off and feed them to you if you were Roman." Bilbo spat towards the tall muscled man, bald with tattoos across his forehead. The man stood his hands on the axes strapped to his back. Bilbo assumed the man had been a smith before the Romans occupation.

The man eyed him with dawning suspicion. "Are you the one they call 'Sting'?" The man growled hands not moving from their ready stance over the axe handles. Bilbo eyed the man's tattoos.

"You're one of the warriors from Mona." Bilbo stated. Mona was where the druids lived and learned, each tribe sent any potential 'dreamers' there along with a personal warrior for the druid. Bilbo was supposed to have gone this Summer but his home was destroyed. It was a shame Bilbo mused, Holman would have been a spectacular warrior to his dreamer.

The man was eyeing Bilbo's small tattoo in return. "You were a dreamer in training, you fight like a warrior." The man replied in turn. Bilbo had trained under his tribes dreamer but he had always wanted be a warrior instead, his mother had always wanted to be a dreamer but instead was one of the greatest warriors in their tribe.

"I was hoping to join the attacks against the Romans." Bilbo spat when he said the word 'Roman', it was a curse, he used it like one and when he wanted to insult someone (even if it was just in his own brain) he called them a Roman.

"And how do I know you're not a spy sent from the Romans?" The man spoke with a disgusted curl of his lips as he said the word Roman.

"They called me 'Sting', I learnt a lot watching their camps, I can give information." Bilbo offered. The man considered him.

"I'll take you to our leader, but any funny business and you'll be killed where you stand. Or tortured, I don't mind which." The man said in a pleasant tone. Bilbo swallowed but returned the grin.

Bilbo looked around still dazzled by the amount of people, maybe they could actually win against the Romans! He was ushered to a tent just as plain as every other one, most people slept on the ground outside. Bilbo looked at the people occupying the tent and all the maps, the person who owned the tent probably slept outside as well. He was brought up to a stern faced woman with long, bright copper hair and was significantly taller than Bilbo's small height.

Bilbo's frame was far better suited to quick vicious attacks, lithe dances. This woman looked more like a woman suited to close battle, hefting something as large as the bald tattooed man's axes.

"Dwalin? What have you brought me?" The woman asked her voice just as stern as her visage.

"Found him lurking. Says he wants to join the army." The bald tattooed man (Dwalin) responded. She sniffed eyed Bilbo curiously eyes pausing on Bilbo's tattoo and dreamer mark and then at the stitching on his clothes.

"I thought your entire tribe was wiped out." She stated watching Bilbo shrewdly. Bilbo stiffened.

"They were, too my knowledge. I came back from running a message to the Eceni tribe and found our homes burnt and everyone inside them dead." Bilbo explained hoarsely eyes staring at a patch in the tents roof.

"I think he's sting." Dwalin said in the small lull in the conversation.

"So you tend to cut off men's balls and stuff them in their mouth then?" The woman said with a feral grin.

"Only when they burn my home to dust, kill my family and rape children." Bilbo responded returning the grin, the punishment for rape in his tribe had been that. The woman nodded, decision made.

"Well 'Sting', I'm sure you'll be an asset to the scouts." She stated before turning back to the maps and listening to the black haired man standing by her elbow.

"Boudicca, Bán." Dwalin said nodding his head to the man and woman in turn and leading Bilbo out of the tent.

Bilbo was put in a man called Thorin's group, Thorin's group was a team of scouts, one that Dwalin was part of.

Xxx

Boudicca's main dreamer looked rather familiar to Bilbo, but where had he seen the tall grey clad man before?

It wasn't until the man spoke to him that Bilbo finally recognised him.

The dreamer came over to impart some important news to Thorin but stopped when he saw Bilbo.

"Bilbo Baggins. It pleases me to know you're alive." The dreamer said, Bilbo frowned and the man grinned. "Come, don't you remember me? Gandalf is my name and Gandalf means me."

Bilbo's eyes shot up. "Gandalf! You're the one who started to teach me! I had no idea you were here." Bilbo said rushing forward with a grin.

"Where else would I be? I do hope you kept up with your training; you have more potential than even you know. You would be a magnificent dreamer." Gandalf stated gently tapping Bilbo's dreamer mark.

"How's your healing going?" Gandalf asked, learning healing was not necessarily part of the training of a dreamer but Gandalf had insisted with a knowing gleam in his eyes. Bilbo shrugged.

"My training is continuing, the healer of the group, Oin, is teaching me more." Bilbo replied. Thorin coughed, getting their attention and ending their chat. Just as Gandalf turned to leave Bilbo caught his sleeve.

"Beware the creature of black fire, the one wreathed in flame on the burning dawn." Bilbo said in an odd raspy voice. Gandalf nodded listening to Bilbo's advice. Bilbo watched him leave, a forlorn sorrowful look in his honey eyes.

"Come, we'll work on your sword work. The wizard will be fine." Dwalin said knocking Bilbo out of his ancient thoughts. Bilbo nodded with a grin following Dwalin forgetting his previous words and worries, Dwalin was a very good teacher and taught to Bilbo's strengths rather than just brute strength, something Bilbo lacked.

xxx

Bilbo turned to Dwalin urgently. "They're coming! A small group, too much for us alone!" Bilbo said frantically. Dwalin nodded and grabbed his arm. Then they were running.

It wasn't the first time a scouting mission had been botched but it was the first time they were so drastically outnumbered and it was only the two of them.

Dwalin suddenly dropped to the ground and Bilbo saw the stone that felled him roll across the ground. Bilbo fought when the Romans came close but his eyes never left the prone body on the ground.

The Romans finally subdued Bilbo, not without Bilbo felling a few first. It was obvious they wanted him alive. Bilbo didn't stop struggling even as they carried him off and he lost sight of Dwalin.

xxx

The Romans wanted him to tell them things, the size of the resistance, the layout of the camps etc. Bilbo hadn't uttered a word giving his torturers filthy glares.

After three days of this the Roman leader gave up. "Get him ready." Was the succinct order.

Bilbo learned what that meant later when he was receiving a flogging, thirty lashes; Bilbo screamed by the fifth and fainted before they reached twenty.

The Romans were preparing him for the cross; it was something they did to prisoners. Bilbo, despite the agonising pain was thankful for the flogging; it would make his death quicker.

He was less thankful for the rape. The Romans weren't allowed to kill virgins and as Bilbo had remained tight lipped they had assumed. Bilbo screamed.

Bilbo was forced to drink some water; they didn't want him to die too soon. Bilbo hadn't eaten since he was captured and had only drunk a little but the hollowness of his stomach and the burning dryness of his throat and mouth was of little concern when he was being hung from the cross.

They didn't have any nails so bound his wrist and feet to the wood.

Bilbo's breathing had shortened four hours in and he lapsed between waking and blissful unconsciousness.

Screams roused him and Bilbo came too to see, through his blurry vision, a picture drenched in red, bright red blood fed the thirsty earth battle cries and dying screams rending through Bilbo's eardrums. Bilbo gasped in pain, unable to force a scream or a yelp past his sore throat as his cross moved.

Bilbo didn't notice as he was cut loose and Oin was called to examine his injuries. He also didn't notice as he grabbed someone's wrist tightly and spoke.

xxx

Dwalin roared as he attacked the Romans who had held Bilbo prisoner and tortured him. His battle rage reached fever pitch when he caught sight of Bilbo's lax, broken form attached to the cross.

Once the small group of Romans were dealt with Dwalin hurried over to Oin who was examining Bilbo's prone form. Dwalin stepped close spitting on the ground when he saw the extent of Bilbo's suffering in the cuts, bruises and marks on Bilbo's pale skin.

Dwalin blinked as Bilbo's hand shot out gripping his wrist tightly. When Bilbo spoke it was the same odd tone that he had addressed Gandalf with. "The smoke with fill the sky, the last full stand. Forced back, scattered like the ashes we fall. The pyre burns high." Bilbo dropped Dwalin's hand completely unconscious.

"Listen well, to the lad. That was the telling." Oin advised to the crowd gathered watching the odd interaction.

"I see why Gandalf had him trained." Thorin remarked before setting them all to tasks to clean up and gather up anything useful.

xxx

Bilbo slowly woke up, eye lashes fluttering open and closed as he struggled to return to wakefulness.

Bilbo slowly and painfully sat up and started the exercises Oin had set him to make sure his back muscles didn't stiffen up forever from the flogging, if you didn't your muscles they turned to wood, you wouldn't be able to bend. Bilbo's motions were a lot smoother than they had been two weeks ago.

Dwalin came over to his sleeping fur carrying two bowls filled with their breakfast. Bilbo nodded in greeting, not smiling, and took the bowl.

"Thank you." Bilbo stated simply, his voice still hoarse. Oin didn't think it would ever lose the hoarseness it had gained during Bilbo's torture. One of the Romans had squeezed his neck tightly, too tightly. It took every ounce of Bilbo's not inconsiderable will power to remain still when Oin had examined it.

Bilbo picked at the gloopy oat mixture. Dwalin said nothing eating his own breakfast. When he was done he put his bowl down and removed something from his pocket, placing it carefully in Bilbo's palm. Bilbo stared at the apple then looked at Dwalin.

"I thought there wasn't any more apples." Bilbo said Dwalin just shrugged. Bilbo smiled, not the same care free grins from before, or the tight feral ones he sometimes gave but the small, miniscule, upturn of Bilbo's lips was the most Dwalin (any of them in fact) had seen since the incident. Bilbo took a large bite crunching the apple with relish before sticking the fruit in front on Dwalin's mouth still holding it. Dwalin took the offered bite and they continued trading bites of the apple Dwalin had brought over.

xxx

"Will he be alright?" Thorin asked Gandalf nodding towards Bilbo. Gandalf surveyed Bilbo noting the haunted look and hollow eyes. Gandalf sighed.

"He thinks his dreamer has gone. That he no longer sees. But he is stronger than any of us suspect; I just wish he didn't have to be." Gandalf said. Thorin nodded at Gandalf's vague non answer.

"You don't think his dreamer ability has disappeared, do you?" Thorin asked Gandalf, Gandalf just smiled.

xxx

Bilbo was never quite the same but the hollowness of his eyes, the deadness caused from his belief that his dreams had gone, lightened and his back healed.

He fought with new fervour, a barely constrained bundle of fury. He reminded many who saw him fighting of Berserkers.

It wasn't long before there was a battle their army wouldn't win and so Boudicca called a retreat. Three dreamers stayed to call up a fog and to distract the Romans. Gandalf, Saruman and Radagast burned that day in a black fire but the army got away safely.

It was years later (the company still fought together) when the army engaged in one of the battles still recalled two thousand years later.

The army readied itself the night before. It would be the first battle Boudicca would fight in since she and her daughters had suffered the same as Bilbo. The scars on Boudicca from the flogging and being tied on the cross were just as easily noticeable as the change in her demeanour. Bilbo looked at her; it would be her final battle.

The night before the battle Bilbo sought out Dwalin bringing him to his furs.

Dwalin was careful, all that pure strength, muscle, restrained and blunt fingers soft, only digging slightly into Bilbo's hips as he let Bilbo dictate the pace. Bilbo used none of the same restraint, he was feral, eyes fixed on Dwalin as he lowered himself onto Dwalin's lap, stretching and taking in Dwalin fully.

The pace was punishing but so satisfying. When they had spent themselves the first time they lay there silently basking in each others warmth.

Bilbo let Dwalin push him gently, always gently, into the furs, let him take him, let him erase the memories of his last coupling in this position. It was not the first time Bilbo had actively enjoyed a coupling, but this time it was more.

Bilbo felt so alive, blood roaring through his veins, heated kisses peppering his lips, chin and chest. The fact they might die in the morning only making them more frenzied.

They slept only a few hours but woke feeling more refreshed than if they had slept the night away.

Dwalin returned Bilbo's feral grin as they charged into battle and Dwalin grabbed his wrist when the army was told to retreat, Boudicca was cut down, fatally wounded. It was Bilbo who tugged Dwalin away when they found the several hours dead corpses of Thorin, Fili and Kili.

They both found the rest of the group they had scouted with for four years.

The entire group continued causing unrest, attacking any Romans living in Britain and leading uprisings.

They all cheered, Oin missing an eye, Bombur two fingers, Dwalin with a stump for an arm, Bifur with a bit of axe lodged in his head and Nori with a permanent limp, when the Romans left British shores.

They may not have been whole, they may not have been healthy, they may be grieving but in that moment they were triumphant.


	6. Chapter 6 Asylum

15. Asylum

Disclaimer.

Also semi based on the prompt:

-AU in which Bilbo's father is killed by another hobbit before Bilbo is born (maybe because Bungo has money or maybe they're Sackville-Bagginses and want Bag-End). That hobbit is well respected and everyone love them.  
There is no proof that hobbit killed Bungo but Belladonna know they did it nonetheless and in a fit of rage she attack them verbally in front of witnesses just after Bungo's death and while everyone is shocked they think it's just the grief overtaking her. She start doubting herself believing that maybe she's just grieving until that hobbit start taunting her when they are alone. One day she snaps and slap them just as another hobbit enter the room, the killer!hobbit act shocked and confused while Belladonna is too upset to explain herself and just run.  
People starts to talk behind her back, saying she lost her mind and that it's not a surprise things turned for the worse after the Baggins she was married to couldn't be here to keep the Took in leash anymore.  
Then when the hobbit who murdered her husband has the balls to come to his funeral, Belladonna loses it and attack them physically nearly killing them.  
The killer!hobbit immediately play the victim and act as if they were traumatized and really scared that she would try something else.  
Belladonna is chased away from the Shire and her home. The Took doesn't believe her when she tell them who the killer is, instead they are concerned and treat like she's going to fly into a rage whenever. One day, they try to forcefully hospitalize her in the equivalent of an Asylum so she decide to leave in the night.  
She remember when one day Gandalf told her about Rivendell and his friend Lord Elrond and decide to go there. On the road, she realize that she is pregnant, but at that point she's in the middle of nowhere and she can do nothing but go on. When she arrive in Rivendell, she's hurt and ill. Lord Elrond invite her to live there, and even send some elves to go seek Gandalf fearing Belladonna would not survive long. She does survives her pregnancy and has Bilbo but she say sick and dies when he is 10. Bilbo is then raised by elves (Lord Elrond ? Galdriel ? Some random elves ?)  
Years later, Gandalf comes to Rivendell to take Bilbo on a adventure ...  
How does everything changes with Bilbo not being raised in the Shire ?  
Maybe Bilbo still try to be respectable because of the way his mother talked about Bungo Baggins. Maybe he still isn't a warrior or a thief but he is really good at sneaking because to sneak past his adopted brother/sister elf to have some calm you need to be a master. Maybe he still refuse Gandalf's offer because he has always been cherished by everyone since the elves still remember poor Belladonna and how fragile she was (not having met her before she fell ill).  
Thorin is probably even more of an ass because Bilbo has been raised by elves and the rest of the dwarves are rather distrustful...

Warnings: Verbal abuse, talk of institutionalisation...Um...

Xxx

Disclaimer. Timeline change, Bilbo born about twenty years later but nothing else changed. Eg, Belladonna+Bungo same age as in book Bilbo just born later.

Xxx

Bilbo sighed. He knew it was to be expected but he did not appreciate being coddled all the time, he was nearly an adult for Yavanna's sake!

He knew his adoptive brothers, sister and uncles, aunts and other adoptive relatives meant well but it was just the tiniest bit constricting (read: it was stifling and chafing to constantly be watched over).

And then, to top it all off whenever he tried to complain they pulled the guilt card on him! That they were worried about him, how they had seen his mother hurt and didn't wish for him to suffer, that they were just protecting him and faced with the large soulful pleading eyes Bilbo couldn't keep a grip on his anger or frustration.

He knew he was different to the elves and that they being blessed (or cursed) with such a long lifespan (usually) that they were...upset by his short life span and mortality but it didn't stop the elves actions from irritating Bilbo.

On bad days Bilbo blamed his mother but soon a wave of sorrow tinged guilt would overcome it and he would go and beg Elrond for stories of his beloved and departed mother. Not all the stories were happy ones.

xxx

Bilbo's mother and father had married at a perfectly respectable age, both 38, so a few years out of their tweens but unfortunately they hadn't been blessed with children. The years went past with no sign of a babe being conceived and so they lost hope of a child and then, much to everyone's surprise, Belladonna fell pregnant.

It didn't halt the years of whispers and unintentionally cutting remarks that hit Belladonna and Bungo. The pity was nearly worse.

And then the hobbit from Bree arrived. He was a swarthy looking hobbit with dark eyes and long fingered hands and apparently a relation to one of the Tooks.

With his arrival several things started going missing from various homes. The missing items were blamed on the troop of travellers, men, that had recently set up camp in the Shire's borders. The hobbits were on a slight alert for the thief so when Bungo heard a noise in his luxurious hobbit hole built for his darling wife he didn't hesitate to investigate.

Unfortunately for Bungo he surprised the thief and was swiftly knocked out with a harsh blow to the head from a silver candlestick wielded by the thief.

Belladonna found Bungo the next morning, blood congealed around his head and a nasty bruise blooming. Bungo never awoke. He spent two months barely alive, barely breathing before he passed away body unable to cope any longer; they were unable to get enough sustenance into Bungo.

The only thing that kept Belladonna moving around was the new life she carried and the need to look after the growing babe. It took three weeks for Belladonna to snap.

At the funeral banquet, a time to talk of the good times with the deceased and to reminisce with joy Belladonna saw the hobbit, the swarthy featured one from Bree and she saw red. How dare the very murderer of her beloved husband stand there free from retribution while her husband lay six feet under? When her child would grow up fatherless?

Other hobbits described Belladonna's flurry of attack with bemusement and shock, Belladonna with her hair flying loose and lank, eyes glittering and mouth in a snarl looked absolutely mad, completely insane. She had to be pried off the hobbit who just whimpered under her assault.

Belladonna was shunned after; no one would look her in the eyes or enquire as to her health.

It didn't stop there. She saw the hobbit in the market and again attacked him in a fit of rage one hand protecting the slight swell of her stomach.

That night she was visited by her brother, Isengrim the 3rd the heir to the Thain. He was visibly discomforted and edgy constantly looking around almost paranoid.

"Sister." He greeted little warmth in his voice and sounding strained. Belladonna invited him in but he just stood in the entryway playing with his cap.

"What is it?" Belladonna eventually asked forgoing pleasantries.

He took a deep breath. "Not enough believe_ he_ killed Bungo, they don't believe you." He said softly a disgusted stress on the word 'he', there was no doubt as to who Isengrim was talking about. Isengrim swallowed not looking at Belladonna. "There was talk of...subduing you, keeping you in a secure room..." Isengrim came to a halt not able to voice any more, they wanted to drug and keep his little sister prisoner in a room. Belladonna paled.

"You have to leave." Isengrim urged softly looking round making sure no one could hear.

Belladonna bit her lip quelling her tears, tears wouldn't help her now. This didn't stop them trailing down her face as she packed taking some of Bungo's things ignoring the impracticality, they were precious to Bungo and so doubly so to her. Isengrim tightened his lips as he passed Belladonna a pre-packed bag of food and a warm oiled travelling cloak, it was winter and the nights were harsh, thankfully the worst of the winter had already ended.

"Farewell and good luck." Isengrim murmured sad to see his sister brought so low. He vowed nothing like this would ever happen when he became Thain.

So Belladonna stole away from the Shire, her home, the land she was raised in and had been born in to travel to Rivendell, home of the elves. Gandalf had mentioned once that travellers were welcomed and that Lord Elrond was a skilled healer. Belladonna placed her hopes in the Elf lord she had never met but read about in few books. She would seek asylum in Rivendell.

She kept off the road but didn't stray too far from it. It was hard going.

She almost didn't make it, many a time only the thought of her unborn child keeping her going, she ate despite the fact she could only taste ash on her tongue, she trudged forward barely feeling the warmth the travelling cloak provided.

It took Belladonna nearly a month of travelling before she made it to Rivendell and when she arrived all she could do was collapse to the ground exhausted barely noticing the breath taking surroundings. Blackness soon obscured her vision and she didn't notice as strong arms cradled her carefully or when curious melodious voices swarmed nor the examination Lord Elrond as a healer gave her and the unborn babe.

It was four days before Belladonna awoke.

Belladonna's first thought when waking was that she and Bungo must have drunk far too much alcohol last night before the events of the last few months caught up with her. Belladonna moaned in pain, the heartache a literal wound in her breast before a barrage of coughs consumed her attention. Belladonna hacked away with a raspy bone rattling cough a last gift from the freezing weather and her trek. May wasn't usually so cold was Belladonna's absent thought as she collapsed into darkness again her coughing fit having sapped her strength.

And so Belladonna lived her life in the Last Homely House west of the sea under the expert care of Lord Elrond. She was well cared for, in fact the elves seemed curious about her, they didn't usually see Halflings and she was pregnant, most elves, she learnt, adored children and were eagerly awaiting the birth of her little one.

But despite the care the toll taken on Belladonna's body was massive. She was no longer in the prime of youth, crippled by grief, pregnant at an age where most hobbit women couldn't conceive anymore and travelling through the winter/ early spring had destroyed her strength sapped at her resilience.

Just walking up the stairs winded her to the point Belladonna had to sit down for at least ten minutes at a time. The duration of Belladonna's pregnancy was spent bedbound and a lot of her time after the birth was also spent in bed.

She named her son Bilbo, close to her husband's name but far enough away that she didn't flinch when speaking it.

Belladonna was frail, the life slowly being leeched out of her, she didn't reach her sons eleventh birthday.

Bilbo was a small babe (even for a hobbit), born early, the strain Belladonna had been under during her pregnancy affected Bilbo in the womb, stunting his growth slightly. Bilbo was prone to chills, coughs and fevers as a child and his slight frame often seemed all the more frail compared to the elves tall but lithely muscled frames.

Despite all this and his mothers untimely death Bilbo was a sweet natured and happy child content to sit quietly in the library and read or to run around in the gardens talking to the flowers.

The elves adored him.

Elrond was his beloved Ada (daddy), Elrohir and Elladan his muindyr (brothers) and Arwen his muinthel (sister), while the other elves who lived partially or fully in Rivendell, Imladris, were just extensions of Bilbo's immediate adopted family.

The elves had seen Belladonna's frailty and her slow fade, only clinging on to see her son grow, and so they were rather protective of Bilbo not wanting him to have the same fate as his mother and possibly not knowing quite how hardy hobbits could be.

It didn't help that Bilbo often fell ill with chills and colds especially in the winter. By the time Bilbo was nearly an adult he wasn't as prone to falling ill so easily or often but the elves didn't forget the times he used to and still coddled him, worrying incessantly.

And Bilbo honestly didn't mind his families behaviour...most of the time. Sometimes it was stifling and Bilbo had learnt the art of sneaking around unobserved. It was hard at first because elves had both excellent eyesight and hearing not to mention an instinct for finding the errant hobbit, but Bilbo had learnt.

There were no other children in Imladris while Bilbo was growing up so his primary playmates were the adult elves that lived there. It was only when Bilbo reached his twenties that a baby named Aragorn (swiftly renamed Estel for his safety) came to live in Rivendell along with his mother.

Bilbo was fascinated by the newcomer and spent hours just watching the babe cooing and chewing his feet.

That had sparked the inevitable 'where do babies come from?' question from Bilbo's innocent lips. He didn't understand why Elladan and Elrohir were laughing at Elrond.

Bilbo would cart Estel around with him (under the careful eye of Gilraen, Estel's mother) showing him the library and the gardens and anything they came across. Then, one day, much like Bilbo's own mother, Gilraen disappeared.

Estel, a toddler at the time, didn't understand but Bilbo was subdued for several weeks after fully understanding why Gilraen wasn't around anymore. He hadn't understood why Belladonna wasn't there anymore when she had died.

Elrond didn't neglect Bilbo's studies. Bilbo was fluent in Weston and Sindarin: writing, reading and speaking, his arithmetic was good and he was taught the history of Middle Earth as well as customs of different races, archery, healing, gardening and a few other subjects Elrond thought Bilbo should learn.

Elrohir and Elladan taught Bilbo how to pick locks, play pranks and generally how to make a nuisance of himself.

There was one thing however that Bilbo did not like learning. He didn't like hearing about hobbits. Hobbits had been mean to his mother, had partially caused her poor health and a hobbit had killed his father. So in Bilbo's eyes hobbits were not a nice race.

The elves were all very careful when taking Bilbo riding, Bilbo much preferred having both feet on the ground- thank-you-very-much!- and any bump or scrape was treated with mild panic, if panic can be mild. It was for this reason Bilbo no longer had sword practice. Elrond did want Bilbo able to defend himself so had arranged Bilbo lessons in weaponry but none of the elves wanted to teach Bilbo after he received a nasty bruise one training, the frailty of Belladonna very much on their minds.

Bilbo had managed to cajole one of the elves –Glorfindel- into teaching him how to use a staff which was more the use of the body, agility and disarming than brute strength. Bilbo had lethal puppy eyes, Glorfindel swore when talking to Erestor. Erestor just patted him consolingly well used to Bilbo's pleading expression when he wanted another book to read or for Erestor to tell him a story.

Bilbo was kept quite sheltered and although happy was quite a serious child; he did grow up surrounded by adults after all.

As Estel grew, following Bilbo round like a duckling, Bilbo swiftly approached adulthood but despite the difference in ages Bilbo and Estel adored one another, Bilbo always willing to play whatever silly game Estel wanted and Estel always willing to sit quiet reading in the library with Bilbo.

It was when Bilbo was 31 that the news of more Orc activity reached Rivendell as well as a message that Gandalf was coming along with a group of dwarves. He and Estel were in a state of constant excitement having never met a dwarf before and both always looked forward to Mithrandir's infrequent visits.

Bilbo was never allowed on the scouting missions and this time was no exception. But being a reckless youth Bilbo decided tagging along for an early glimpse of the dwarves would be harmless. He didn't factor being caught by trolls in his calculations.

Bilbo stole away undetected in the early morning while Estel was asleep, they shared a room. He rode atop the horse he practised riding on making liberal use of the steps specially built so Bilbo could actually mount a horse, the smallest one in the stable, brought for its small size especially for Bilbo. It was still a swift and gentle horse (near pony sized), perfect for getting away on as it shared its masters penchant for walking around near silently.

It was after a while riding that Bilbo noticed a fire in the distance, rather resembling a camp fire. Bilbo didn't have the same level of eyesight as an elf but his eyesight was still keen, keener than most.

Bilbo crept forward leaving his horse, Bell, to champ on the grass knowing she wouldn't roam far. Bilbo tried to quell his excitement as he approached the fire, he couldn't wait to see an actual dwarf!

Bilbo's brow furrowed in confusion as he caught sight of a wriggling sack...

He withheld a gasp as he peered into the campsite. Trolls! Three of them all debating how to cook dwarf!

Bilbo eyed the sacks in new light. Bilbo gulped as he caught sight of dwarves being turned on a spit. All Bilbo could make out was a lot of hair, large noses and lots of bruises. The dwarves looked like they had taken on an Ent and lost spectacularly, or maybe three grotesque trolls.

Bilbo huffed silently wide eyes still watching the three hulking forms, he knew trolls turned to stone in daylight but he wasn't stupid or naive enough to think the trolls didn't know this too. They would eat the dwarves before daybreak.

He had to do something!

What did his ada always say? _'Your mind is your greatest weapon...you won't be as strong, as tall or even as skilled as most people you come across but while they can be disarmed your mind stays with you forever, never underestimate the power of words'_. Still, Bilbo would have preferred back up...a whole army maybe? At least some archers...

Bilbo's thoughts trailed off as the largest dwarf was picked up ready to be eaten, Bilbo was moving before he realised it.

"Stop!" Bilbo yelled as loud as he could climbing up a tree as fast as he could, hidden by the thick trunk.

"Eh, wot?" The troll holding the dwarf said confused forgetting the dwarf in his hand.

"You are making a terrible mistake!" Bilbo shouted in his high piping voice.

"Wot is it, Bert?"

"Wot are you?" The trolls questioned scanning the area for the owner of the voice, Bilbo thanked the stars he had the foresight to climb a tree, he could always go from one tree to another easily as the trees grew close together and bountiful. Bilbo scurried to a tree in a different place from where he started.

"I am he who walks unseen." Bilbo retorted moving again as three heads swivelled in his direction, small troll eyes not picking up Bilbo's small form.

"Can we eat it?" The smallest troll asked scratching his head.

"I am far too stringy and chewy to be tasty, besides I'd probably give you indigestion." Bilbo said already scurrying to a different tree.

"Still better than nothin'." The troll holding the largest dwarf said remembering the dwarf in his hand and moving to toast the dwarves toes in the fire.

"Wait! They'll give you worse indigestion than I ever could! Have you smelt them? Urgh. They're infested! Riddled with parasites!" Bilbo squeaked out desperately. Luckily his words seemed to do the trick as the troll holding the large dwarf quickly dropped him in disgust.

Unfortunately for Bilbo, while that was going on the middle sized troll had crept up on him and as he hadn't moved plucked him from the tree with alarming ease. Bilbo squeaked loudly in surprise hurriedly wriggling out of the grasp and running along the trolls arm and clinging onto its neck.

"May the dawn take you all!" A familiar voice boomed and a staff cracked the rock sheltering the trolls from the sun. Bilbo breathed out in relief as the troll he was clinging to, hoping not to get crushed, turned to stone.

Now he just had a lesser problem...how to get down.

"Mithrandir!" Bilbo called out in greeting, of course the wizard had come to the rescue, none too soon Bilbo thought with relief.

Bilbo settled down on the stone trolls shoulder watching as the dwarves freed themselves with help from Gandalf. When they were free most started checking each other for injuries clucking over the multitude of bruises and small cuts, luckily no bones seemed to have been broken but a couple of cuts and burns looked nasty.

Two dwarves walked over to the troll Bilbo was perching atop. "Why don't you come down?" One asked curiously but there was a demand in the question. Bilbo huffed a laugh.

"If I could I would, but it seems a little high from up here." Bilbo called down. Thankfully Gandalf again came to the rescue.

"Bless my beard, Bilbo Baggins! Well this is a surprise! Jump down, don't worry I'll catch you." Gandalf called up. Bilbo took a deep breath and closed his eyes dropping down. He vehemently denied squeaking loudly...again.

Strong arms caught him and set him down.

Bilbo opened his eyes to look curiously at the dwarves only to find he was being examined with equal curiosity back. Mixed with a bit of disdain.

"Ni veren an gi ngovaned, Mithrandir." (I am happy to meet you, Gandalf.) Bilbo said hugging the wizard enthusiastically.

"Elves." One of the dwarves spat. Bilbo stiffened leaning away from Mithrandir's comforting embrace.

"Is it an elf child?" Another dwarf questioned excitedly. Bilbo turned to face the dwarves.

"I am not a child!" Bilbo huffed.

"Are you dwarves?" Bilbo asked sardonically before his earlier enthusiasm came roaring back. "I've never seen a dwarf before; ada doesn't like me wandering far. Where are you going? Are you and Gandalf on a mission? Are you hunting the orcs? How did you get captured by the trolls? How do you braid your hair like that? Wow, can you show me how you make your hair look like a star? What sort of crafts do you specialise in?..." Bilbo rambled on and on and the dwarves looked steadily more astonished Bilbo could ask so many random questions until Gandalf interjected with a cough.

"Oh, how rude of me. Bilbo Baggins at your service." Bilbo said bowing and continued before they could greet him. "Some of you look injured, my ada is a really good healer and he doesn't mind guests and there's food, ale and baths. It's not far." Bilbo looked at them expectantly. Several dwarves looked amused while a couple had their jaws wide open gaping at him.

A heavily tattooed one turned to the one with flowing black hair and no beard. "I think the lad just invited us for dinner." The tattooed bald one said with a chuckle.

"We'd be delighted." Gandalf said patting Bilbo on the shoulder. "I do need to speak with your ada. Will you stay with us until we get there? Or are you going to go ahead?" Gandalf asked.

"Stay." Bilbo said after a brief pause. "Ada won't shout at me in front of guests." Bilbo muttered just audible.

"Oh, dear." Gandalf said smiling. "Did you sneak out perchance?"

Bilbo shrugged looking at the ground sheepishly.

He watched curiously as the dwarves and Gandalf entered the troll cave not bothering to go in. He already smelt far too troll like for his liking, he didn't need to add to it. Gandalf gifted him with a small sword despite his protests that he didn't know how to use it with some odd advice, Bilbo didn't want to kill anything thank-you-very-much. He said as much but Gandalf just graced him with a queer knowing smile and walked off.

The bald one walked up to Bilbo alongside a shorter dwarf with a long white beard, they had the same nose shape but otherwise didn't resemble each other much.

"Thank yer laddie, yer distracted the trolls from Bombur well." The bald one said bowing slightly while the white haired dwarf nodded solemnly a warm twinkle in his eyes.

Bilbo shrugged. "I'm sure anyone else would have done the same, no thanks needed. Anyway, I was looking for your group." Bilbo added sheepishly watching as both dwarves eyebrows rose in tandem.

Bilbo blushed. "Well the scouts said you were coming with Mithrandir and I've never seen a dwarf before."

"Well I've never seen whatever yer are before either." The bald one said bluntly. Bilbo grimaced.

"I'm a hobbit, a Halfling." Bilbo said with distaste. The white haired one looked curious at Bilbo's distaste but the group was interrupted by an odd fellow dressed in brown and riding on a rabbit sled before he could question him further.

All Bilbo could remember of the next events was fear filled adrenalin pushing him on to keep up with the dwarves, without it he would have surely fallen behind. They were being chased by orcs!

Bilbo was absolutely terrified, he had never ever been in a real life threatening situation before and so this was new and unpleasant in the extreme. Thankfully he didn't have much time to dwell on it as he followed the dwarves and Gandalf to where he knew there was a secret entrance to Imladris.

The dwarves, Bilbo and Gandalf huddled in the stone cave like crevice and flinched as an orc fell down the gap an arrow sticking out of its throat. Bilbo winced and turned ashen, he knew exactly who that arrow belonged to.

"Ada's going to kill me." Bilbo moaned picking up the arrow and taking it with him ignoring the questioning looks, it was one of his ada's best set of arrows and as it was undamaged Bilbo would offer it as a peace offering...if he wasn't smothered to death first.

Bilbo followed the last dwarf, one wearing a funny hat and curled up moustache braids, morosely wondering what Elrond, Glorfindel, Erestor, Elrohir, Elladan and the others were going to do to him. Lock him in his bedroom for the rest of his life didn't sound too absurd. Despite his melancholy thoughts the view that greeted them as they walked down the valley to the last homely house never failed to life Bilbo's spirits and today wasn't an exception.

There was something wholesome about the air in Rivendell, soothing, and Bilbo relaxed minutely.

They wandered down to the main entrance and Bilbo heard the clatter of hooves as the scouting party returned. Elrond ignored the group of dwarves that had drawn their weapons at the first sign of Elrond's approach. The one with the odd hat had dragged Bilbo into the middle of the group and Bilbo gratefully hid behind the tall bald one.

"We cannot find him. His tracks were well hidden and vanished soon. We did find his horse, Bella, wandering around but there was no sign of Bilbo." Elrond said hurriedly to Erestor, his anxiety was obvious as he was speaking in Weston in front of guests with little care, Elrond tended to slip into Weston when agitated for some odd reason, Erestor who was standing on the steps looked worried. Elrond scrubbed his face with his hand before turning to face the dwarves and speaking swiftly to Gandalf still distracted. Bilbo saw his chance.

He ducked out of the group of dwarves and crept carefully away unseen for a few heart stopping moments before a clear voice rang out and Bilbo stiffened.

"Bilbo!" A voice called and suddenly Bilbo was tackled by a being just a bit smaller than him in height but bulkier in muscle and bone structure. Bilbo fell to the ground with an 'oof' hugging the dark haired boy back.

"Estel." Bilbo wheezed coughing slightly. Instantly Bilbo was surrounded by concerned elves checking him for bruises and nervously listening to him cough. Bilbo batted the hands away gently. "I'm fine!" Bilbo exclaimed. "I have nary a scratch. But the dwarves are hurt! Can you heal them ada?" Bilbo pleaded turning wide eyes to Elrond. Elrond caved visibly at the look ignoring the dwarves protests that they were 'fine and didn't need a tree-shaggers help'. Bilbo blushed along with Estel, rarely were vulgar words uttered around them as they were 'children'.

"We will be talking about this, henig, you ran out into danger for no reason!" Elrond exclaimed anger defeated by the pure relief at having Bilbo safe and home again.

"Yes ada." Bilbo said subdued.

"I will see to your injuries and then for some refreshment. Erestor inform the cooks that food should be sent to the main dining room." Elrond said addressing first the dwarves then Erestor who looked pained at leaving Bilbo so soon. The dwarves complaints shut up at the mention of food.

xxx

Bilbo did feel guilty about leaving with the dwarves, only a small note stating his intentions left on his bedside table.

He was relieved when Elrond, leading many elves Bilbo had grown up with, appeared to fight in the battle against the orcs and goblins. Worry swamped him though when he realised how dangerous a battle actually was, even for experienced elves.


	7. Chapter 7 Turn of the Century

16. Turn of the Century

Sherlock's/Baker Streets irregulars.

Disclaimer.

Warnings: um... living on the streets? Gen.

Thorin was the first. His father had disappeared one day and with his mother already dead and no other relations Thorin had only had the streets.

He was young, not even eleven but he was strong and hardy. He learnt quickly.

He met Bilbo six months into living on the streets. Bilbo was a pickpocket and a dam good one. Bilbo taught Thorin how to choose who to pickpocket and the best alleys to avoid the cops. Bilbo was small and lithe easily flitting through a crowd unnoticed, he was nine.

After a month or so of randomly meeting up and helping each other, giving tips about the police Bilbo introduced him to Nori, the same boy who taught Bilbo to pickpocket in the first place. Nori was ten with an odd hair style and a quick grin and even quicker fingers. Where Bilbo could talk his way out of trouble and Thorin could fight his way out of trouble, Nori was too quick to get into trouble.

Nori looked after his younger brother while his older brother shined shoes, mother dead and all different fathers that had buggered off years ago.

Bofur (twelve) met Bilbo and they became fast friends, Bofur always wore a funny hat but he was kind and helped anyone if they asked.

Thorin found two boys, age seven, twins, and took them under his wing. They called him uncle.

Bilbo found a boy as well, aged five, Frodo after meeting Fili and Kili decided to call Bilbo uncle.

Thorin and Bilbo collected kids, street kids, and looked after them. If you were caught by the police Thorin would cause a distraction and Bilbo would get you free.

They called themselves the Company. Two brothers barely eighteen, Balin and Dwalin, left them food when they could and helped if things ever got sticky, because once they too had been on the streets.

Bilbo helped an elderly man on the streets once and the man, Gandalf, payed him back by getting him in touch with a Mr. Holmes. Sherlock Holmes paid them to tell him information on the streets, simple information to the boys but one Sherlock Holmes couldn't gather himself seeing as he didn't live on the streets.

Sherlock called them the irregulars, they didn't tell him they were the Company and Sherlock didn't tell them he knew.

Mr. Holmes lived in Baker Street with an ex-soldier, a Dr. Watson.

When Thorin was shot in the shoulder Bilbo, not having any other clue what to do dragged Thorin to Baker Street and asked if Dr. Watson could possible help Thorin.

Bilbo offered the Dr. Watson a stolen purse for helping Thorin but the Doctor said he would do it for free.

Next time Bilbo went to John Watson for medical supplies, Fili and Kili had a fever, instead of offering money Bilbo left a packet of the Doctors favourite tea.

Every time the Doctor helped them, cured them, Bilbo would leave him something simple that he knew the Doctor liked, tea, cigars etc. When the news came that Sherlock Holmes was dead, had fallen, Thorin and Bilbo managed to drag John from the gravestone and to his home and wife who was waiting for him anxiously.

When John's wife died and the little baby with her Bilbo and the others made sure the doctor was eating properly and taking care of himself. If that meant occasionally cook for John, washing his clothes and making him get out of bed, then so be it. John had given them food when it ran scarce for the Company, he had given them blankets when he couldn't afford to and most importantly, he used expensive medicines on them refusing money.

When a message came to the Company from Sherlock, the same Sherlock who was supposed to be dead, Bilbo didn't hesitate, despite the warning and Thorin's orders.

Bilbo rushed to John's house and told him Sherlock was alive; after all the good the Doctor had done for them Bilbo couldn't keep this from him. John didn't believe him until Bilbo showed him the note, it smelled of the same tobacco Sherlock smoked and the ink wasn't long dried but most importantly the message was dated and was in Sherlock's sharp concise script.

The poor Doctor fainted, it had been a trying year, his wife died in childbirth and now Sherlock, John's friend, had let him believe he was dead.

Bilbo pressed the importance of acting like he didn't know onto John. Bilbo also watched over John more, making sure he wasn't targeted by the odd crime circle that Sherlock had 'died' destroying. The others helped when they realised what he was doing.

Thorin was furious when he learnt that Bilbo had told John but Bilbo stuck by his convictions, John deserved to know.

The Company watched with baited breath on edge for two whole months when Bilbo and Thorin were at odds.

It was after Sherlock had returned to John (and John had punched him) that Thorin and Bilbo patched things up.

Bilbo looked at his friends mournfully, they couldn't stay invisible on the streets forever, it was far easier to hide as a street urchin (and less dangerous) than be an adult on the streets and Thorin, Bofur, Bifur, Bombur, Dori, Nori, Gloin and Oin looked like adults when they were fifteen let alone the seventeen (more or less) they were now. Ori, Fili, Kili and Frodo were still children and Bilbo was small still so passed for a child on first glance.

John and Sherlock helped them set up a small business, a small second hand bookshop up front and an information broker in the back. Gloin and Oin may have brewed a potent form of moonshine in the cellar, and Bifur and Bofur carved toys for children. The book shop was filled fairly quickly seeing as they had stolen a good many books over the years (Bilbo, Frodo, Ori and Dori did like to read). And Bilbo wrote children's books that sold well.

All the money was split fairly and they paid Sherlock and John back for the premises as fast as they could. Bilbo had enough money to send Frodo to school, for a proper education and later to university.

Bilbo usually manned the store front, he wrote at the same time, while Thorin, Fili, Kili, Nori and Bombur shaped metal into pretty trinkets that sold well. John popped over for tea and a chat (and to see how they all were) frequently much to Bilbo's pleasure. Bilbo liked the Doctor, John was understated but behind the calm veneer and Doctor's precision was a keen brain and a kind heart.

When John died they all attended his funeral then returned to the book shop to remember a kind man and their friend (along with a healthy amount of moonshine).

Bilbo sipped a cup of tea, the doctors favourite brand, and smoked a cigar, he didn't smoke. Sherlock joined them and he too, like Bilbo, sipped tea and smoked a cigar.


	8. Chapter 8 Elizabethan Era

18. Elizabethan Era

Disclaimer.

Warnings: homophobia, execution, death of characters. Sad Bilbo/Dori.

_Dori smiled into the light kiss pressed to his lips. "Hello, love." Dori greeted pushing Bilbo gently against the tree and drawing Bilbo into a deeper kiss._

_Dori drew back eventually relishing in the heavy, smitten look Bilbo was giving Dori, complete with lightly flushed cheeks and kiss reddened lips. The younger man grinned at Dori linking their arms and dragging him over to the small brook._

_Bilbo eyed the scenery, all of it familiar, all well known but he found new delight in the way the sun glittered on the water the patterns on the tree trunks, the lush green grass. Bilbo laughed flopping onto the ground staring at the sky, eyes tracing patterns in the clouds, laughing with abandon. _

_Instead of watching the wildlife and greenery like Bilbo Dori couldn't take his eyes of Bilbo. Bilbo lying on the ground uncaring of the grass stains now littering his clothes, his honey brown curls gleaming when the sun hit it, honey brown eyes warm with affection and ceaseless joy at his surroundings, and sweet, sweet honey coloured skin. White teeth visible in the wide grin Bilbo couldn't drop._

_Dori couldn't resist stroking the invitingly soft honey curls, Bilbo closed his eyes nearly purring at the petting._

_Soon though, almost too soon Bilbo sat up and dragged Dori to the softly trickling water toeing off his shoes and socks, rolling up his trousers and paddling in the refreshing stream. Dori's breath caught at the scandalous display, it was one thing to bare your feet in your bedroom but to do so outside, where anyone could see..._

_Even as propriety bid him to get Bilbo to put back on his shoes, socks and to roll down his trousers Dori couldn't quite find the words to put a halt to Bilbo's simple joy at feeling the water rush over his feet. Instead of ruining the moment Dori slowly stretched out a hand and stroked foot, gently massaging the ankle. Bilbo's breath caught in his throat before he giggled, the sound melding with the sunny summer day._

_They spent many lazy summer days by the Brook._

_When it got too cold to sit by the Brook they moved inside to the library, trading lazy lingering kisses before the fire and sharing their tea. Bilbo giggled whenever his little brother, Frodo, pulled a face whenever he caught Bilbo and Dori kissing. It would inevitably make Bilbo get up and chase his little brother until he caught him and tickle him mercilessly. It was a nice way to spend the winter._

_Every Spring both Frodo and Bilbo fell ill, too excited to wait when they say the first thawing to wait until it actually warmed up not pretended to. Dori would nurse them better all the while scolding them for their foolishness even as they looked at him with matching wide eyed pitiful expressions. And Dori would always cave, feeding them broths and reading them stories from the books they both adored. _

_Every Autumn Bilbo watched the last leaf fall from the biggest tree in the garden with a mournful look; he liked the snow but not the cold or the wet._

_And the years went by._

_Soon Dori was watching his grey haired lover lying by the brook enjoying the sun, new wrinkles peppering his face. And Bilbo would always giggle whenever Dori decided to register each new addition by careful study of Bilbo's entire body, they retired to the bedroom for that._

_Dori watched with fading, aging eyes as his loves declining health, his coughs deeper, a hacking instead of his natural melodious giggles._

_Dori only lasted a month after Bilbo departed._

xxx

Nori sighed wearily reading the papers Dori had kept secret, reading about the idealistic fantasy Dori had cooked up. There had been no Brook; all kisses were shared in absolute privacy and Dori had not spent lazy hours kissing Bilbo in the library where anyone could walk in at any time.

You stupid fool. Nori thought as Dori's longing practically seeped from every page. Dori had had his love, he had had Bilbo and he had pushed him away, pushed him into certain death.

xxx

It was forbidden. The thought nagged at the back of their minds despite their gasping breath, frantic kisses and desperate love making.

If even the servants caught a glimpse of them...

Bilbo stifled a moan clutching skin tightly. Dori hushed him, drawing him in for another deep toe curling kiss, thrusting with abandon. Dori tugged on honey brown curls eyeing the lost expression of bliss crowd Bilbo's face hungrily.

They were both nobles, both wealthy but they couldn't have what they most desired, most wanted. It was a dangerous game they played, the Queen Elizabeth's own uncle had been accused of desiring the male sex and he was executed on the green by the tower for it.

Dori and Bilbo had spent years skirting round the issue before they had finally gotten together for as many stolen moments as they could. It was their life on the line every lingering glance, every soft touch.

If one of them was a woman it would have been easier, at least you could go up to one of the opposite sex and express your desire to court them. If Bilbo or Dori had tried that and the other had not been interested they would be dead, their secret aired for all to see.

Bilbo and Dori went travelling a lot, escaping gazes that could see too much. In some places they could live together for a few months without a single suspicious glance, in others they barely lingered a day.

And when their families demanded they marry a suitable lass they shrugged and said they weren't ready for marriage, didn't want to get married etc.

Dori suspected Nori knew, but Nori wouldn't say a word. Bilbo knew his little brother Frodo knew but Frodo was a clever, quiet lad, he would hold his tongue.

Every time a man accused of homosexuality was killed Bilbo thanked his stars it wasn't Dori or him while pitying the man accused.

Bilbo wished they could have been born in Greece in the time of Alexander the Great. It didn't matter if you preferred men to women then.

Bilbo relished every stolen look, every stolen touch, every stolen kiss and he felt delightfully filthy, a thief of the highest calibre.

Bilbo was a naturally cheerful man, kind hearted and always ready with a smile, occasionally loosing himself in his books.

Until the smiles stopped and the happiness always present in his eyes disappeared.

Dori didn't come around as often, his time taken up by his new wife, his new pregnant wife.

When Bilbo learnt this he signed up under Sir Francis Drake, the Queen's 'legal' pirate.

Bilbo returned home a year later in a box.

Frodo glared at Dori whenever he saw him, blaming him for his beloved older brother's death.

Dori only smiled for his brothers Nori and Ori and his daughter. He never had a smile for anyone else and when he did smile it was rare. His laughter nonexistent.

Dori wrote a book, a book that was never published and a book he kept secret even from his brothers. Nori only found it after his beloved brothers death.

Bilbo had always wanted to write a book, he had always been scribbling or reading.

He dreamed of a life where Bilbo was a woman, so their love wasn't seen as unnatural, where they could kiss without worrying of the servants seeing, without sinning.

He dreamed a life where they staged their own deaths and ran away, Bilbo was small enough to pass as a woman if they dressed him as one. Or where they managed to find somewhere that accepted their love.

He dreamed of a place where they could get married and live happily together.

He dreamed of a time when he didn't halt their relationship despite his marriage, where he named Bilbo as his daughters godfather, where although he had to marry a woman and beget a child, he wouldn't try for another, where he still shared Bilbo's bed, where his daughter grew up calling Bilbo 'uncle' and Bilbo laughingly told her wondrously fanciful stories making her laugh at trolls, calling her father a dwarf.

He dreamed of bright endless happiness, soft honey brown curls, warm honey brown eyes and sweet honey tasting skin.

Dori laid up with fever didn't mind the thought of his passing now; he died with Bilbo's name on his lips and memories of their kisses and heated touches in his fevered brain. Just like Bilbo drowned Dori's words of love in his ears and the warmth of his kisses on his lips.

Dori died in his fevered dreams, dreams of a life where he didn't marry the woman his family ordered him to. A life where he lived with Bilbo's happy laughter and warm smiles for many years instead of the swift secret five they had shared all under the threat of execution.

Notes:

First bit, in italics, Dori's writings, what he wanted to have happened not reality.

Second bit, after Nori's small part, reality.


	9. Chapter 9 Pole Dancing

**20. Prostitutes/Strip Club **

**Semi based on a story I read, can't remember the name.**

**Disclaimer.**

**Warnings: attempted rape, mentions of prostitution, drugs, violence. Um...**

They had come to kill him. Years of working in the seedier areas of London had honed his senses and taught him to keep himself sharp. He watched and he had noticed them. He had seen as the small group of men asked for more and more drinks, eyes fogging over due to the copious amounts of alcohol they had drunk.

At least Barliman, the bar owner, would be happy. He sneakily rose the prices when people were much too drunk to notice. From his place on the stage he saw the empty bottles, the money being exchanged. But he kept dancing, kept up the sensual moves for those not yet too drunk to watch.

He ignored the bile creeping up his throat. Was this it? Was this how his pitiful (and short) story would end? He kept up the beat closing his eyes just focusing on the dancing.

It wasn't the life he had envisioned. It wasn't ideal. But he had stopped dreaming when he was five years old.

"Hey, cutie!" A voice called. He opened his eyes and saw a man seated near the stage leering at him. "I want a private dance, come here and dance on my lap." The man jeered waving a note clutched in his grimy, sweaty hand. Bilbo grimaced and stepped further away from the edge of the stage and away from the man. His dance was over in a couple of minutes; then he would be able to escape.

Bilbo closed his eyes again. When he closed his eyes he could imagine he was far far from the seedy bar he worked in, far from the grungy gutter of London. He could imagine writing a book, just like he used to dream of doing.

In his fantasy Bilbo didn't have gnawing hunger pains in his stomach, didn't have broken men leering at him and wore clothing that wasn't on its last leg or obscenely tight. He had always been more comfortable wearing baggier clothing, it enabled him to hide easier and it was concealing.

But the best part of the day dream was the fact he had someone waiting for him, he wasn't alone. It made him feel warm on freezing nights the dream that someone was waiting for him.

Bilbo opened his eyes as his dance ended. He spotted the men, they were waiting for him but unlike his dreams this sent a shard of ice cold terror down his spine rather than a warm feeling in his chest.

He knew they had come for him. In a way it was a relief, an end from this tiring endless, dreary existence and an end from the endless paranoia and anxiety. But another part of him was screaming that he didn't want to die, that maybe things would get better soon. Bilbo didn't want to die tonight. He had received a warning, the bruises hadn't faded for a long time he had had to cover them in makeup and stay at home for a while till they faded a little.

This time they weren't here to warn him.

Bilbo went over his plan feeling his pulse race and his hands sweat. He discretely checked the knife tucked away and thought of his jacket and trainers in the back.

xxx

He sat in the back of the room, the shadows distorting his features and allowing him to remain hidden something that was rare since he lived his life in the spotlight. Even the night before he had been escorting a famous actress (he forgot the name, Poppy Took something or other) up the red carpet. He was a self made billionaire before the age of thirty and he enjoyed the perks that came with it, especially since he hadn't had much of anything before.

He had nearly been this, he mused to himself staring absently at the mass of drunkards, he had nearly been the filth of society until he clawed his way up and above to get at the sweet fresh air.

Most were ashamed if they came from poor and shady backgrounds and they tried to cover it up. He didn't, he refused to deny part of himself especially something so essential to his core. It was funny; he smirked without amusement, that his shady past and the visible scars on his face all drew people-especially women-in. He would have thought that they would have a little more self preservation than that; they should be running away, he was the bigger predator, a threat. Yet instead of being cowed they flocked him wanting a little of the danger, drawn in by the darkness but not understanding or wanting the reality.

Most people didn't understand the darkness, Thorin mused. He knew most of the people he 'socialised' with now would run as fast as possible if they encountered the darkness he held within. He also knew that the boy on the stage lived with danger licking his every step, tracing his path and tainting every breath.

He felt an unfamiliar emotion surge as he mentally traced the boys features. After a few minutes he placed it: guilt. Thorin couldn't believe how far Bilbo had sunk. It was because of him, Thorin, that Bilbo was living this life.

Thorin watched the subtle sensuous movements as Bilbo moved in time to the beat of the music dancing to his own bodies natural music that somehow made the dance so much more erotic. The fact that Bilbo looked so innocent while performing such a provocative dance held many spell bound.

He had seen one man drop his glass when Bilbo had swayed. No one reacted to the tinkling sound of smashing glass, far too used to it and far too deep in the alcoholic buzz to notice.

Thorin sat in perfect stillness like the predator before it strikes on its defenceless prey. Thorin nearly snorted at that thought, Bilbo was far from defenceless and from what Thorin knew he went everywhere at least armed with one knife.

His whiskey on the table in front of him sat untouched, just a facade to hide behind, Thorin rarely drank and when he did it would be far higher class than the swill served here. He also couldn't afford to dull his senses. Getting drunk just delayed whatever you were escaping from and Thorin hated delays.

He faced his mistakes just like he was facing one right now. He never should have left him. No matter how much Bilbo hated him he should never have left.

Bilbo swayed gracefully on the stage making a few men twitch their hands as they controlled their desire to grab his slender waist.

Bilbo had always been thin and small, it was how he was built, but he was much thinner than he should be Thorin mused noticing the skin stretched over the bird like bones.

Pulses raised as Bilbo looked up demurely, eyes shadowed by dusky eye lashes promising you the world.

Thorin had watched Bilbo grow up, had seen him evolve from awkward teen to enchanting adult. Bilbo exploited the looks he had been gifted and his natural grace as he danced. The longing in the dance sent tingles down Thorin's spine enrapturing many.

Thorin cursed his bodies reaction to Bilbo's sway. He hadn't acted on his desires before he dam well wasn't going to concede to them now.

Thorin downed his whiskey in one ignoring the little voice that told him it wasn't a smart idea. He was furious. His gaze never left the enticing form on the stage.

Bilbo's messy-bed head- curly hair still a golden honey colour, promising sweetness ended between his chin and shoulders in uneven curls, soulful vibrant honey eyes that looked deceptively innocent, pale skin lightly flushed from exertion. Extremely tight green top and small black shorts revealing much more than it hid, although that was probably the point. Show what's on offer Thorin thought sourly.

It took every ounce of his not inconsiderable willpower not to leap on stage and drag Bilbo away from the lecherous stares and greedy fingers. Was this what Bilbo had become in his absence? Anger burned his throat. When had Bilbo sunk so low? Well it would be the last night that Bilbo worked here Thorin promised himself.

Thorin waved away the bar man he didn't want another drink. He kept one eye on the group of men who were watching Bilbo's movements avidly.

He had made a mistake leaving Bilbo, thinking he would be better off without Thorin. Bilbo had ordered Thorin out of his life and Thorin hadn't been able to counter any of the accusations because they were all true.

Thorin grimaced as he realised this was probably the worst time to come back into Bilbo's life. It was the third anniversary of their explosive argument, an argument Thorin was responsible for.

xxx

Bilbo didn't waste any time. The moment he left the stage he grabbed his jacket and slung it on, hiding the two knives underneath the edge of it and slipped on some trainers over his bare feet, he had always felt more free dancing bare foot. I helped that some people apparently found it arousing so paid him more tips.

His feet were aching miserably from his long hours dancing with few breaks and from his pinching shoes when he worked at the cafe as a waiter. He ignored the pain with practised ease, everything ached, tonight was no different.

Bilbo slipped out of the back of the bar, Barliman let him use the back so he wouldn't have to deal with any amorous or drunk (or both) people groping him.

He breathed in deeply finding a calm state of mind, he couldn't afford to panic or freeze, he owed it to himself to at least try to escape. Was it a nasty coincidence that they picked the anniversary of the estrangement? Bilbo didn't believe in coincidence and he wondered what he had done in a past life to deserve this.

Bilbo nursed his anger, anger would be good. Bilbo snorted at the dark alley; it was such a clichéd way to die. He eyed the mud and other less savoury things with disgust. Was he going to die with sewage down his face?

"Well look at the cutie now." A slow drawl came from the darkness and they emerged faces concealed behind hoods.

"Do you have the money or are you going to give us a private performance?" One of the men called. The others laughed dirtily.

Bilbo smiled full lips catching their interest as he stepped back into the gutter slightly face shadowed. "Well I don't have the money but I am sure I have something that will catch your interest." Bilbo purred while on the inside disgust and fear made bile rise in his throat.

He stepped back slightly and let his jacket fall open hoping the darkness would hide his knives. "But you can't claim it from over there; you'll have to come closer, one by one." Bilbo beckoned. Noticing the eyes glued to his revealing clothes. He almost felt dirty from their gazes alone.

"I knew you would see sense." The leader rasped voice hoarse with lust as he stepped closer. He sauntered over and Bilbo bit down the strong urge to flee.

"I'm cold." Bilbo gave a theatrical shudder swaying lightly in the rain watching in satisfaction as the leaders hands twitched wanting to draw him in closer.

"There are six of us here, cutie. That enough to warm you?" The leader asked rhetorically smirking.

Bilbo shifted looking as if he was leaning closer to the man when in actual fact he was tilting his body so they wouldn't spot the knives. The man moved forcefully dragging Bilbo's jacket off and dropping it onto the ground. "Why you wearing shoes, we can't see your bare feet." The man complained. Bilbo smiled sweetly, the innocent act always seemed to draw people in and send them wild with lust. Sure enough the man leaned closer.

Swiftly Bilbo struck.

He stabbed the man in the leg with his knife and kicked the man hard in the crotch; the man crumpled a high whine bubbling up from his throat. He was steaming mad that the leader had dropped his warmest (and only) jacket in the filth on the ground. Not stopping to pick it up Bilbo ran.

Bilbo was a very good runner. While his frame wasn't built for big muscles and brute strength it was built for speed.

He heard the sound of the others in the group running after him. It was rather like the short amount of time he spent bullied by his cousin Otho and his gang when he had spent a few months with his Aunt Lobelia. Only this time he wasn't tossing taunts over his shoulder, sure he could out run them and outwit them, this time it was almost feral. Bilbo felt the adrenalin give him an extra boost and he grinned manically. If he was going to die he wasn't going to make it easy for them.

Bilbo made sure his other knife was still there.

Suddenly Bilbo slammed into something solid. He heard a muffled exhale of breath pausing in shock and horror that he had been caught before his brain kicked in. He raised his knee intending to kick the man between the legs but the man had anticipated that reaction and caught Bilbo's knee. Bilbo struggled squirming and wriggling trying to break the iron hold. Without uttering a single word the man still using brute strength moved Bilbo so he was pressed right up against the hard body still trapped within his arms, he made it nearly impossible for Bilbo to move.

There was something frighteningly familiar about the hard body and Bilbo burned at the close proximity. Blaming it on adrenalin and the fact he was going to die tonight Bilbo began wriggling again in earnest trying to escape.

Bilbo felt the body respond to his closeness and movements and smirked, he had found a weakness after all.

Bilbo trailed a hand down the man's chest and grasped the stiffening cock as well as he could through the trousers. In shock the man's arms loosened and Bilbo gave a hard squeeze to the turgid length making the arms loosen further before he punched the clear jaw and made a run for it.

Bilbo made it three steps before he was dragged back into the hard chest arms closed around him. Not for the first time Bilbo cursed his diminutive stature, he was short and rather slight.

"Don't you dare pull a stunt like that again!" The furiously gruff voice washed over Bilbo almost hissing in anger. Bilbo froze as he recognised who he had just punched. His face warmed when he realised what else he had done.

"Thorin-?"

"Shut up!" Thorin commanded arms tightening as the group finally caught up with them.

Thorin Durin or 'Oakenshield'. Bilbo tried to focus on the present rather than the thoughts of the last time he had seen Thorin swamping him.

"Hey, thanks for catching him." The man in front of the group said. Bilbo idly wondered if the man he had stabbed was still lying in the alley whimpering. He didn't care. He was in far more peril now than before, Thorin Durin was there.

Bilbo tried to get out of Thorin's harsh hold but all he got was a hiss of rage from Thorin.

"Let me go! I don't want help from you!" Bilbo mutinously demanded in a whisper.

"Of course you don't. You're doing perfectly well without me aren't you?" Thorin's scathing reply made Bilbo's cheeks flame with shame that Thorin was seeing him at his low point.

"I can handle it." Bilbo stubbornly replied straightening his spine and squaring his shoulders. Thorin barely spared him a disbelieving glance.

"Back off, he owes us." One said voice menacing. "Get back in your fancy car and we won't harm you." He continued. Bilbo looked around and spotted a sleek top of the range sports car, definitely something that stuck out in this neighbourhood. Bilbo snorted slightly hysterically.

It was a reminder that Thorin didn't belong in this world anymore, that he was so far above them it was laughable. It was a reminder that Thorin had left. So why was he here? Why return?

The man Bilbo had stabbed limped over glaring viciously at Bilbo and placing a hand over the wound.

Bilbo looked at the group and their eyes glazed with anger, alcohol, drugs and lust. He shuddered. He and Thorin were doomed, literally.

Before Bilbo could do anything Thorin turned him around and pressed a burning, devouring kiss to his lips. Bilbo eagerly returned it; if he was going to die then he would at least die happy; in blissful unawareness. Bilbo parted his lips enveloping Thorin's tongue when it reached out to trace the inside of Bilbo's mouth.

There had always been something in the way that Thorin looked at Bilbo that thrilled him, some unknown desire, when they were teenagers and then later on. They had always been drawn to one another.

Bilbo moaned.

He heard and snigger and Thorin released Bilbo. "Now that's just greedy and not fair." One complained.

Thorin pushed Bilbo back and stepped out of the shadows and into the light. The men's smirks faded slowly as they took in Thorin's cold features, icy in their disdain. One man even shuddered when he caught sight of the scar tracing its way down Thorin's cheek.

Bilbo numbly realised that what he had expected to happen wasn't happening. One by one the men were falling back in the face of a bigger predator. Bilbo saw their dawning comprehension as the men recognised Thorin. The scar, a single flaw in a work of art. But an identifying flaw.

Thorin was talking to the men in a low voice that from where Bilbo was standing he couldn't hear. At one point Bilbo thought he heard someone say 'Oakenshield' but he didn't manage to catch anything else. Just as Bilbo was about to slip away unnoticed they turned to look at him. It was vaguely creepy. Bilbo wondered irrationally if Thorin was going to join them. Thorin had, after all, once been the leader of the most feared gang called the Company. Bilbo shook away his silly thoughts.

Thorin, no matter his faults, wouldn't let others physically hurt Bilbo too much. And he himself he had only ever once raised a hand towards Bilbo, Bilbo had the scar to prove it.

Thorin slowly strode over to Bilbo, his back to the men. Bilbo nearly rolled his eyes at Thorin's familiar arrogance.

Thorin reached over and brushed Bilbo's wet hair out of his face tenderly. The action was so out of the scene they were currently playing that Bilbo knew it was an act to prove something to the group, to prove their relationship. They didn't have a relationship but for the moment they had to act like they did.

Bilbo smiled brightly at Thorin. He briefly caught the hint of pain in Thorin's eyes at the blatantly fake smile that held no real emotion before Thorin turned back to the gang. Their relationship had died, been trampled by Thorin's attempt at murdering Bilbo three years ago.

"Get in the car." Thorin ordered calmly if a bit tightly. Bilbo got in the car because Thorin was still radiating that aura of power and he had no doubt that if he ran Thorin would force him into the car.

Thorin drove off at high speeds probably breaking the speeding limit of each road. Bilbo had been wrong, Thorin wasn't calm. Not in the slightest. He was ragingly angry. Bilbo had only rarely seen Thorin loose his legendary calm and it hadn't been pretty; the last time was etched onto his brain. Thorin grasped the steering wheel with tight white knuckled hands and Bilbo opted to stay silent and just enjoy the fast speed. There wasn't much point in Thorin saving Bilbo then killing them in a car crash but Bilbo said nothing. He and Thorin both had a thing for speed. And if they crashed it wouldn't be Thorin's fault as he was an excellent driver.

Bilbo flushed with shame as he recalled how wantonly he had responded to the kiss. He had spent three years hating Thorin's very name and that very same Thorin had made him turn into a pile of goo from one kiss. Remembering their last meeting snapped Bilbo out of his current thoughts. He straightened in his seat arms wrapped around his torso trying in vain to keep warm.

He was briefly surprised that he wasn't thinking about the six men that had been going to kill him before he recalled that Thorin had always made him feel safe and it seemed even the near death experience and three years apart didn't change this.

"They called you 'Oakenshield'." Bilbo stated unable to keep silent any longer. "It's been so long since you left that life but your reputation still precedes you." Bilbo stated wondering why he felt so at ease next to such a dangerous man. He had seen the darkness, saw it even and it didn't repel him.

"Why did you come tonight?" Bilbo asked curiously.

"I heard rumours about some trouble and a boy sweet as honey who moved so sensuously." Thorin succinctly explained.

"I wasn't looking for trouble." Bilbo muttered. Thorin grinned but there was no warm emotion behind it.

"You never do." Thorin said. "How much did she owe them?" Thorin asked. Bilbo wasn't surprised he knew Thorin generally knew everything that went on. He had contacts everywhere. Bilbo's aunt Lobelia had owed the gang money and as Bilbo was next of kin he had to pay it.

"Forty thousand." Bilbo stated flatly giving a bitter smile resisting the urge to shudder at the horrendous amount of money. "It was twice that but I managed to pay back half. I'm late with a payment that's why they went after me tonight." Bilbo stated as flatly as he could.

Thorin understood everything that Bilbo left out. The hunger, violence and deprivation that they both had experienced went unmentioned.

Thorin's eyes flashed with fury and he swerved angrily in the road.

"You paid them?" Thorin hissed through tightly clenched teeth.

"I didn't have a choice." Bilbo said annoyance dripping from his voice.

"You could have gone to the police." Thorin suggested speeding through a red light.

Bilbo snorted. "That would have just made everything worse." Bilbo said his contempt for the police force visible.

"Law abiding citizens shouldn't be afraid of going to the police, Bilbo. Were you afraid you would be arrested." Thorin said testily his gaze flicking to Bilbo's exposed thighs pointedly then looking back out of the window contempt and fury raging.

Bilbo frowned trying to understand what Thorin was saying. Suddenly it clicked. That was why he was so angry; he thought that Bilbo- Bilbo bit back a giggle. He thought Bilbo was a prostitute like most of the others working at the bar. Bilbo had to wear provocative clothing as part of the job but all he did there was dance, apparently he brought crowds in.

Bilbo burst out laughing hysterically.

"You think it's funny?" Thorin spat out enraged. Bilbo just laughed harder a tear slipping down his cheek he was laughing so hard.

"You should have come to me if you were that desperate for money. It didn't matter what happened. If you were in trouble you should have come to me." Thorin bit out thickly still looking absolutely furious eyes boring into Bilbo's face.

"You are the last person on earth I would ask help from." Bilbo stated quietly but with a bitter determination.

"Pride like that kills Bilbo." Thorin said defeated. Bilbo bristled.

"It's not about pride! I wouldn't know how to contact you if I wanted to. You're surrounded by posh clever people now and security. Why do you need security? Is it because you don't want to get your suit mucky or chip a nail?" Bilbo mocked. He couldn't claim to be terrified of Thorin, wary yes but not terrified, even after the attempted murder.

"Don't change the subject!" Thorin demanded before continuing in a quieter tone. "You would rather die than contact me?" Thorin half stated half questioned looking slightly lost.

Bilbo stared out of the window surprised to see they were close to where he lived.

"You know why I didn't contact you." Bilbo said.

"I know you blame me for everything yes, you hate me." Thorin acknowledged grip tightening around the steering wheel.

"Not everything just that one thing, just holding a knife to my throat and trying to kill me. Do you know what tonight is?" Bilbo asked. Thorin's eyes flashed.

"Does it please you to know I blame myself as much as you do?" Thorin asked wryly.

"No." Bilbo whispered.

Bilbo unclipped his seat belt and excited the car into the pouring rain. "Thanks for the lift." Bilbo muttered. He didn't say home, this place wasn't home. It was just a place to store his stuff at and sleep until he moved again. Bilbo moved constantly.

Bilbo felt slightly disjointed as he noticed the differences. Thorin was standing in his expensively cut suit next to his top of the range car while he was standing there in cheap revealing clothes next to the graffiti ridden wall.

Did he really look like a prostitute? He was as far from his daydreams as possible Bilbo thought despondently.

Bilbo jumped as Thorin placed his coat over Bilbo's shoulders and closed it covering him up as if he couldn't bear to look. The coat was almost comically large for Bilbo, sleeves falling past his hands and the body of the coat ridiculously loose, Thorin had a much broader frame.

"You do realise this is the last place any sane person would want to come to at night?" Thorin asked rhetorically.

"They tracked me down; they don't know I live here." Bilbo said carefully folding the sleeves up before freezing. "How do you know I live here?" Bilbo asked panicking slightly.

"I make it my business to know things. We probably have about ten minutes before that gang knows too. Gather your things up quickly." Thorin ordered. "Move!" Thorin shouted when Bilbo remained still.

xxx

The ground floor.

He was living on the ground floor. Thorin stood silent and motionless as Bilbo struggled with the thick bolts and locks that held the door shut. Bilbo was struggling more than usual with fury making his arms tremble and fingers lock, longing to clench and punch the bastard behind him.

Thorin clenched his teeth tightly and breathed in and out. In and out, in and out. Slowly he calmed, well more like locked his anger in a small room inside his head. His control separated him from those meaningless thugs they had left behind but it was a tenuous control, his temper always so close to the edge was rearing its ugly head and was harder to put down than normal.

He recalled Bilbo's near breakdown at the mention of his _employment_. Bilbo had laughed! Laughed! Thorin turned away, he couldn't reconcile the picture of a young Bilbo trembling in the cold but giving up his jacket to one of the young children and comforting her even though he had no idea where their safe comfortable home and loving parents had gone either.

Bilbo now wore tight provocative clothing and danced for seedy old men as well as... Thorin clenched his fists tightly. Where had the innocence gone?

Bilbo was one of those rare individuals that no matter what happened, no matter how low his life got he had a type of purity, an innocence about him that was entirely incongruous.

Bilbo had 'slummed' it with the gang, done what he needed to keep himself (and others) safe but still his eyes showed an innocence and kindness many craved.

Bad people, nasty people and broken people all sought to claim that innocence, all sought to take a piece for themselves or at the very least tarnish Bilbo's out of spite.

It was why some of the nastiest characters known all had someone sweet, someone nice and pure waiting for them at home, hidden from the world, a sweetly painted ornament. Innocence was craved but impossible for them so they soaked in someone else's. Bilbo's innocence was tarnished.

Thorin had known from the wild and overall passionately desperate kiss they had shared.

Thorin cursed his bodies intense almost violent reaction in remembrance of a simple kiss. But then nothing about Bilbo was ever simple.

Thorin breathed deeply. Now was not the time, he had to get Bilbo to safety and fast.

Bilbo was shivering in Thorin's overlarge coat. Thorin wasn't going to risk getting closer to warm him through body heat- even though Bilbo sold his favours to men he knew his touch wouldn't be appreciated. He already had one bruise blossoming on his face he had no need for another.

Thorin ruefully reflected that at least Bilbo hadn't forgotten how to punch, Thorin had taught him after all.

Bilbo angrily pushed open his door at last.

"Here, home sweet home. You've seen me here you can go. Thanks for the ride." Bilbo bid him good bye already stepping into the dark room he inhabited.

"I'm not going anywhere." Thorin stated absently mentally cataloguing all their escape routes and the fact that in the entrance way like they were they were sitting ducks.

He took one last longing glance to his black Ferrari assuming it wouldn't be there when they left Bilbo's temporary home.

"If you're worried about your toy just go back and play with it." Bilbo sniped twisting in Thorin's grip as he grabbed him back and stepped in front of him. Thorin almost smiled; it was similar to what Bilbo had used to say when Thorin occasionally had his obsessions.

"What are you doing, I didn't invite you in! If you want coffee I'm sure you can get one of your employees to bring you something even at this late hour. You've had one kiss for free that's all you're getting." Bilbo snappily said already barging past Thorin and into his room. Thorin wondered at the fear Bilbo was covering up with bravado, it was a sort of in built defence mechanism for Bilbo. When afraid cover it up by being even brasher. The more bravado the more fear.

"That kiss saved your life." Thorin stated even if it had dislodged him from his more comfortable frame of mind.

Thorin looked around despite knowing what the place would look like, he had spent most of his childhood in places like this; bars at the window, locks on the door and a boarded up post box seeing as whenever something was posted it sure as hell wasn't a friendly library note saying you need to return some books.

It was small, dank, dark and musty. He closed the blinds.

"You shouldn't be living on the ground floor." Thorin bit out glaring at Bilbo before his sentence sank into his mind. The scathing look Bilbo sent him sent the message further. He of all people should know the reason Bilbo chose the ground floor.

"Pack everything important then we'll leave." Thorin ordered turning away when he caught sight of a flash of slim creamy thighs catching his breath.

Thorin dearly wished he had found out another way to protect Bilbo than kissing him, the directed blood flow seemed to have drained his head of brain cells as well as blood.

How many people had had Bilbo? Thorin's hands tightened. How many had ran their hands over that soft enticing flesh and wiry lines? Why had he waited three years before finding Bilbo? Why had he thought Bilbo would be better off without Thorin in his life?

Bilbo reached for a mug unaware of Thorin's internal torment. Thorin watched as the coat slipped slightly and he caught the sight of something hidden in Bilbo's waistband barely concealed by the tight fitting clothes and loose coat.

Thorin hissed and leaned forward sticking his hand down Bilbo's shorts ignoring Bilbo's muffled outrage and batting hands.

Thorin stepped away knife in his hands. Thorin carefully pointed the knife away from Bilbo but Bilbo still flinched at the sight of a knife in Thorin's hands, he was so angry, no furious, he couldn't trust himself to stand next to Bilbo.

"What the hell is this!" Thorin hissed dangerously. Bilbo considered him, warned of Thorin's unstable mood by his use of a curse, Thorin hardly swore only when he was feeling particularly emotional.

"It's a knife. Don't you recognise one when you see it?" Bilbo asked mocking eye brow raised. Thorin had indeed seen many knives before.

"You shouldn't carry this." Thorin stated trying in vain to control his temper. Where had his legendary smooth mask gone? Oh yes, he was with Bilbo, no mask of his managed to last in Bilbo's presence.

"If I hadn't turned up when I did..." Thorin trailed off meaningfully. Judging by Bilbo's stubborn expression Bilbo wasn't as cowed as Thorin had hoped.

"I would have used it if I had to." Bilbo stated looking resolute. Thorin almost mournfully surveyed him. Bilbo really would have used it if he hadn't turned up. If Thorin had been just half an hour later Bilbo would have died, the men would have managed to take away the knife and things would have gone extremely south. He had almost lost Bilbo before he got him back again.

Loud barking hit their ears reminding Thorin he had better things to do now than berate Bilbo, he could scold him later. Thorin debated whether he should have brought Bilbo here at all then realised Bilbo would need his passport.

"I don't know why you're in such a rush Thorin, it will take me more than five minutes to find another place to live, this is premium property don't you know." Bilbo said voice loaded in sarcasm.

Thorin nearly grinned, before he remembered the deadline.

Bilbo grabbed the mug he had pulled down and filled it with water from the tap. "Water? I can't give you coffee they turned off the electricity and gas last week." Bilbo said grudgingly drinking thirstily from his mug.

"Four minutes thirty seconds Bilbo." Thorin bit out shuddering as he saw the litter and deserted street. How many times had Bilbo walked back here only to narrowly miss some unsavoury characters? How many times had Bilbo nearly died walking home late at night?

"I take that as a no." Bilbo shrugged ignoring Thorin's statement and placed the empty mug down. Thorin frowned and reached out for Bilbo's hand pulling away when he saw Bilbo's flinch. He eyed the red bruising of Bilbo's knuckles.

"I forgot about your hand, is it all right?" Thorin asked concerned.

"My hands fine. Your face?" Bilbo asked. Thorin lightly traced the bruise that was forming on his jaw.

"It's fine." He had forgotten it until Bilbo mentioned it but it was hardly worth noticing. Thorin strode over and opened the fridge looking at the empty shelves in disbelief.

"What do you eat?" He asked Bilbo incredulously.

"I usually eat out." Bilbo stated rolling his eyes, his thin frame telling an entirely different story. "I can't go a week without eating in at least one Michelin-starred restaurant." Bilbo said dryly. Thorin put his concerns about Bilbo's diet to the back of his mind; he needed to get Bilbo to safety he could feed him up later.

Thorin noticed the lack of freezer compartment and turned a questioning eye to Bilbo who was watching him warily.

"I don't have a freezer compartment. You'll have to take your gin and tonic without ice." Bilbo snapped looking steadily more and more defensive as Thorin stayed in his 'home'.

Thorin frowned didn't Bilbo know his life was in serious danger? But when the light caught Bilbo's face Thorin saw the shadows under Bilbo's eyes, deep and purple, and the haunted and slightly paranoid expression in Bilbo's expressive wide eyes. Bilbo knew, he knew exactly what was going on.

Thorin frowned at the odd feeling in his stomach. Was that...guilt? Thorin never ever felt guilty but Bilbo's fear pulled at him. He shouldn't have left. Pushing aside the distracting emotions Thorin focused on the now.

"One minute left. I'd get packing now." Thorin advised.

"Get out of my home Thorin." Bilbo ordered in return.

"No." Thorin said flatly.

"Get out of my life!" Bilbo ordered even more firmly than before and with a rising sense of panic.

"I did that before, it didn't turn out well. You're stuck with me." Thorin replied with a shark like grin.

"Worked fine for me." Bilbo grumbled knowing it was utter bollocks.

"I'm back in your life whether you like it or not."

"You may be rich but you can't afford me, Thorin, I'm out of your league." Bilbo stated hoping throwing the fact Thorin thought him a prostitute back in his face would disgust Thorin enough that he would leave.

Thorin wanted nothing more than to pin Bilbo to the wall and demand answers as to why he was doing this, why he had allowed it to happen but Thorin already knew the answers.

Him. It was his fault Bilbo had given up caring.

Thorin pulled back the curtains squashing the rising feeling of guilt. He spotted the dark van. "You've run out of time, Hansel*; grab your passport we're leaving." Thorin ordered.

"I'm not going anywhere with you." Bilbo stated his jaw set in determination.

"Move!" Thorin roared ignoring the twitch Bilbo gave at the raised voice.

"I-"

"Say one more word and I'll save them the trouble and stab you myself! Grab your passport!" Thorin barely held his thoughts in check as the coat slipped again and Thorin caught another glance of Bilbo's alluring flesh.

"I don't have a passport! It wasn't me who joined the higher edges of society. I have no need to fly out to the Mediterranean for the weekend!" Bilbo snapped. Thorin almost groaned in frustration.

"I'll get you one." Thorin assured Bilbo. Bilbo rolled his eyes.

"When will this penetrate your obnoxiously thick skull? I am not going with you." Bilbo said planting his feet securely on the ground arms crossed over his chest.

"You are coming with me whether you want to or not! Even if I have to haul you out in a fireman's lift!" Thorin growled deliberately not envisioning the scenario he had just stated.

They heard a car door slam and Bilbo jumped. "Times up." Thorin stated latching onto Bilbo's thin wrist but Bilbo tugged back successfully getting his wrist free.

"Wait! I need to get something." Bilbo said already clambering on top of the table and reaching for something. Thorin averted his eyes from the stretching figure next to him ignoring the tantalizing bit of flesh that was revealed when Bilbo's tight shirt rode up. Bilbo clung onto the large cardboard envelope and tucked it carefully inside the coat.

Thorin swiftly used his mobile to call someone when he caught sight of the same six men just outside. Thorin grabbed hold of Bilbo when he nearly toppled off the table Bilbo wriggled out of his grasp.

"Whatever you have there isn't worth risking your life over." Thorin stated pulling Bilbo with him.

"Follow me." Bilbo murmured leading them to the small toilet that could barely fit one of them let alone both. Bilbo shimmied out of the window Thorin following a little more slowly and with more curses.

Bilbo had probably practised this escape many times along with all the other exits; Bilbo always was prepared in the right ways and seemingly by accident. Thorin swore to himself that Bilbo was never coming back here even as he had to look away from the tempting sight Bilbo made as he wriggled out the window and exposed more flesh.

Bilbo immediately made to run away from Thorin but Thorin was too fast managing to catch hold of Bilbo round the waist.

Before Bilbo could run away from him again or stubbornly stay put Thorin just lifted Bilbo over his shoulder disregarding Bilbo's kicking and punching. Bilbo remained silent in his assault encase the men who had gone round the front heard, otherwise he would be hurling insults as well as struggling like a wildcat.

Thorin dropped Bilbo into the passenger seat of his car which seemed the limit Bilbo's tight cheap shirt could take and most of the buttons popped off leaving Bilbo's chest bare.

Thorin wondered if it would have been easier to face a gun as he tore his gaze away from the sight and entered the driver's seat eyes fixed forward and speeding away hearing police sirens arrive as he left.

xxx

Bilbo came to feeling something soft encasing him. He felt boneless in the soft warmth.

"Bilbo, Bilbo can you hear me?" A rough angry voice questioned. Bilbo ignored the irritating voice and pressed his face deeper into the soft thing under his head. He didn't want to leave such warm safety nor answer the voice that sounded cross.

"I should have removed the wet clothes. He's been asleep too long." The angry voice said.

"Probably shock, boss and he is warm enough now." Another voice answered. "Do you want me to call a doctor?" The second voice asked.

There was a pause then. "Not yet."

Bilbo inwardly frowned. Was there _worry_ in the angry voice? But who was there to be worried about him?

Another thing occurred to Bilbo as he resolutely kept his sleep pretence. Bilbo never slept. He only ever had 'cat naps', one eye open and other such rot. He was always to tense too alert to sleep for long and if ever he was so exhausted for his worries not to matter then he had nightmares. Bilbo never felt safe enough, content enough to sleep, so why did he feel so content right now?

Bilbo's eye lashes fluttered open and he turned his head catching sight of stern blue eyes. Bilbo smiled at the Thorin in sleepy haze and was answered with a brief softening of Thorin's facial features. Bilbo's smile drooped and fell off his face when his brain caught up with reality and reasons why he really shouldn't feel safe. Thorin caught the return of his thoughts and turned away jaw clenched tightly.

"Have a bath or shower and grab some clothes; the bathrooms there and the dressing room there. Wear anything that looks like it might fit when you are dressed we need to talk." Thorin waved to the two doors leading to the rooms and spoke in a clipped tones.

Bilbo sat up hands anxiously fiddling with the soft blanket. Bilbo saw his cardboard envelope next to him and snatched it up cradling it carefully. Thorin watched with a blank expression and shuttered eyes.

Thorin broke away from their brief unsettling impromptu staring competition as a man entered the door of the bedroom.

"Chief inspector Elrond Farseer on the phone says it's urgent." The man stated succinctly.

"I'll ring him back later." Thorin said dismissing the man abruptly, turning back to Bilbo.

The man walked out unnoticed by either Bilbo or Thorin. "You called the police." Bilbo stated more than asked but there was a definite question to it.

"That is what the police are for, dealing with crime. Now I need to call Elrond if you need anything shout." Thorin said already walking out of the room.

"Wait! We can't stay here, they probably followed us. They're dangerous." Bilbo finished. He might not like Thorin at the moment but he hardly wanted him harmed.

"I'm dangerous too, or did you forget?" Thorin ended rhetorically, frowning at himself for lack of tact as Bilbo flinched.

Bilbo frowned he had forgotten nothing about Thorin. Despite how much Bilbo had wanted to hate him he just couldn't hate the man he had grown up with, couldn't hate Thorin. Thorin was burnt onto his brain like a brand that would-could- never be removed. He had barely managed to hate Thorin for three days after he tried to kill him. He still loved the bastard.

"You used the police as a delaying tactic." Bilbo accused lightly well used to Thorin's various manipulations and sly schemes. "They'll be back though, they want money and-." Bilbo faltered.

The group had been going to either have him willingly or not and Bilbo knew it wasn't really because he was sexy or any of those things that would pick him out of a crowd. The gang had only been going to do it because it was an excellent scare tactic and pleasurable for them. It made the 'victim' more eager to pay the money on time, more desperate to avoid it happening again. And unfortunately for Bilbo he knew it yet still would much rather pay the money early if he could.

"If you can't even say it then you'd be better off in another profession." Thorin said bitingly eyes narrowed.

Bilbo didn't bother ridding Thorin of his wrong assumption, he was both too tired and listless to counter it and the disgust Thorin showed at it meant Thorin might let him leave sooner.

Bilbo surveyed the room he was in curiously. It was huge and extremely posh looking. Bilbo's jaw nearly dropped. How much had this room cost?

"Nice hotel room, clever too they wouldn't search for me in such high class accommodations." Bilbo rambled on trying futilely to escape the piercing look directed to his face.

"It's my apartment and you're in my bed." Thorin stated not removing his gaze from Bilbo's form. Bilbo tried not to show his surprise by anything obvious, judging by the small flash of amusement in Thorin's eyes he hadn't succeeded.

Bilbo ignored the fact he was in Thorin's bed and looked around with curious disbelieving eyes. Did it make him sound so incredibly stupid and poor to say he hadn't known apartments could be this big?

"So, your business is going well then?" Bilbo asked still in slight shock though managing not to gape. He bet Thorin had never had someone so out of their depth in this room before, he bet Thorin had never had anyone like Bilbo in this room ever. It was tastefully done if a little bare of homey touches. Bilbo wondered at the very masculine feel of the room, surely Thorin's girlfriend would have added some personal or womanly touches.

"Business is great." Thorin answered flatly.

Bilbo eyed the fireplace carefully. He hid his unease well, it wasn't lit after all. Bilbo looked around the room and found the lack of things littering it both comforting in its familiarity to Thorin, Thorin had always been rather minimalistic, and unnerving because Bilbo was sure that if Thorin had money like he must to own an apartment like this then Thorin would have brought the latest gadgets and gismos he liked.

"So this is where you live then." Bilbo stated.

"It's one of my homes yes." Thorin replied. Bilbo's lips twitched with slightly bitter amusement. He couldn't imagine actually owning a nice house let alone several of this type of calibre.

Bilbo's hand twitched. He hated being in unknown situations, which this was, and suddenly he got up unable to stay in the large bed any longer despite its lovely warmth and softness. Thorin watched his every move as he paced restlessly. Bilbo had never been unnerved by Thorin's piercing stares before, in fact he was one of the only few who didn't flinch at them and bore them without unease but now felt different.

Bilbo used to being stared at by Thorin hadn't realised that other stares, looks, bothered him. So it came as an unwelcome shock to his system when he started working at Barliman's and people followed his form with their eyes. But over the last couple of years he had gotten used to being watched however now the tables were turned.

Bilbo wandered over to the large window and stared at the sight. London was breathtaking in its evening glory despite all the seedy areas that cloaked the city but Bilbo didn't notice that all he saw was the height, the fact they were far above the bottom floor. Bilbo recoiled viciously turning wounded, haunted wide green eyes to Thorin in desperation.

Thorin flinched at the look directed towards him but caught Bilbo keeping him still. "You are fine, it's safe up here." He said calmly trying to infuse some of that calmness into Bilbo's rapidly panicking figure. Bilbo shook his head beyond speech as he stared accusingly, beseechingly at Thorin fingers clutched tightly into Thorin's arm.

Thorin dragged him to a wall that when he pressed a button slid away revealing an escape chute a slide, then dragged Bilbo back inside when Bilbo started shaking in a mixture of terror and cold from the icy rain.

"There are two other escape routes just from the bedroom and many more dotted about." Thorin assured him. Bilbo nodded faintly face drained of blood and eyes still impossibly wide. Bilbo eventually steadied his breathing and when colour returned to his face in an embarrassed flush he turned his head away from Thorin. Thorin seeing his resultant embarrassment from panicking sighed.

"Bilbo you have no reason to be embarrassed about your reaction. When you were five you had to escape a burning building and in the process saved your little cousin, not to mention that a few years later your godfather, Gandalf, died in a fire in front of you, I would be more worried if you didn't have a negative reaction to high buildings and fire. But this apartment is safe." Thorin reassured him. Much to Bilbo's further embarrassment, he shouldn't have broken down especially not in front of Thorin. Even if Thorin was the only person who would fully understand his reasons.

Thorin sighed and hauled Bilbo over to the door he had shown him earlier gently shoving him inside. "Take a relaxing bath and get dressed. I'll see you in a minute." Thorin said before abruptly leaving the room keeping his gaze determinedly away from the revealed flesh.

xxx

Bilbo revelled in the hot water for a whole two minutes before reality caught up with him and he hurried to finish washing his hair swiftly. The hot water had done wonders for his tense muscles tightly coiled and slightly more relaxed Bilbo entered the bedroom swamped in a towel, he didn't have any other clothes with him after all and his shirt was ruined.

Bilbo stood unsurely in the huge bedroom determinedly staying away from the window. Maybe he could borrow something of Thorin's?

Bilbo curiously opened up the different doors looking for a wardrobe or something like that but also taking the opportunity to snoop.

Bilbo only found more rooms expensively furnished but devoid of personal touches before he came to what was obviously the wardrobe he quickly pulled on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt ignoring the fact they were designer brands, it was still cheaper looking than the expensive suits.

Bilbo belted up the slightly baggy jeans and rolled up the ends so his feet could peek out luxuriating in the plush creamy carpet that covered the ground. Bilbo was tempted to just curl up and sleep on the ground, it felt far more comfortable than his ramshackle bed that was really just some boards put together.

Bilbo delightedly relished in the comfortable (and nice) baggy clothing at such a contrast to the tight clothes he had to wear dancing and even the form fitting uniform he had to wear when working at the cafe.

Bilbo jumped when he caught sight of Thorin who had just entered the room face unreadable with an intense expression.

Bilbo fiddled with the sleeve of the over large jumper nervously one shoulder of the jumper almost falling off his own slight one.

"Come and eat something, you look more than half starved." Thorin ordered roughly drawing Bilbo out of the room and into another with a large table at the centre filled with tantalising scents and mouth watering foods. Bilbo needed little encouragement to dig in to the delicious food of which he couldn't afford. Bilbo nearly moaned out loud when he chewed some bacon, such simple fare but he had rarely had enough spare money to buy enough cheap foods to eat let alone pay for gas or electricity to cook meat with.

xxx

Thorin could barely keep his eyes on the food in front of him.

Bilbo was _wearing_ his clothes!

Bilbo was wearing _his_ clothes!

_Bilbo_ was _wearing his_ _clothes_!

Thorin had thought the sight of Bilbo wearing the obscenely tight clothes would be his undoing but Bilbo looked absolutely adorably edible in the clothes swamping his frame and the fact they were his clothes on Bilbo sent a spark of possessive satisfaction through him not to mention a rather large jolt of lust.

Thorin briefly drew out of his thoughts to reflect sadly on the fact that Bilbo was taking such enjoyment out the simple food fare and he tried not to linger too long on Bilbo's pleased expression.

He had more control. Thorin sternly told himself ignoring the near overwhelming urge to sweep up Bilbo and keep him trapped in his arms before moving onto more...pleasurable things.

Bilbo shoved his plate away when he was absolutely stuffed and leaned back in his chair trying in vain to smother a yawn. "Go to bed." Thorin ordered Bilbo and Bilbo nodded far too tired to protest.

Bilbo excited the room and nearly bumped into a heavy set man. Bilbo widened his eyes and his face split into a beaming grin outside of his control. Bilbo didn't flinch as he was pulled into a firm embrace. "Bombur." Bilbo greeted clutching Bombur's shirt.

"It's good to see you again, Bilbo. You're far too skinny! Next time you run off make sure to keep in contact, I like cooking my friends meals." Bombur ordered softly. Bilbo swallowed but nodded. That had been one of the hardest things when he left after Thorin nearly killed him, leaving his friends (more family than anything else).

"I missed you all." Bilbo said gripping onto Bombur tighter. Bombur frowned sadly.

"Well, you're here now, we're all here too. I'll call Bofur, he left when you did." Bombur said patting Bilbo gently on one bony shoulder.

Bilbo nodded (he and Bofur had kept in touch) yawning and made his way back to the bedroom.

xxx

Thorin made his way to the bedroom a few hours later. Bombur had chewed him out and told him off again over his near killing of Bilbo three years ago, not that he didn't deserve it of course, but Bombur had then gone on to threaten leaving with Bilbo if he ever did something like that again.

Bofur had left when Bilbo did; Bofur and Bilbo had always been good friends. And the others had lost a little bit of their care free natures, there was less laughter.

Thorin entered the bedroom and immediately started panicking. The bed was empty! Thorin calmed down a little when he saw the quilt from the bed missing. Thorin looked at the slightly ajar door...he wouldn't...would he?

Thorin opened the door fully to find Bilbo fast asleep curled in the quilt at the very top of the chute, clutching the cardboard envelope tightly. It was raining heavily and a cold breeze was blowing. Bilbo was shivering even inside the quilt and Thorin withheld a sigh instead smiling fondly. At least Bilbo was dry.

Thorin carefully lifted Bilbo and carried him to the bed.

Xxx

Bilbo woke slowly surrounded by warmth. He opened his eyes and nearly jumped a mile heart pounding as he saw several asleep figures crowding the bed with him. Slightly jostled by his movement one of the figures groaned kicking another and soon everyone in the bed was sleepily blinking, clearing their sleep fogged bleariness swiftly.

"Bilbo's awake!" Came a cry and Bilbo was soon smothered in hugs, at the bottom of a human puppy pile. And Bilbo was laughing (it was that or crying) and hugging them back, he had missed his friends dearly.

Fili, Kili, Gloin, Oin, Dwalin, Ori, Nori, Dori, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur and Balin. He had missed them all, even Thorin.

"Good to see you, laddie."

"Your back!"

"We missed you."

"You should have spoken to us, kept in contact."

"You're way too thin."

"Were you keeping well?"

Bilbo laughed at them all speaking over each other. Bofur eyed Bilbo carefully.

"You're thinner and more tired than you were six months ago." Bofur interjected quietly quelling all conversation.

Bilbo smiled weakly. "Things were a little problematic." Bilbo explained. A snort caught their attention.

"Problematic! A gang trying to kill you was problematic! Five months ago you were in hospital for two days covered in bruises, you were lucky nothing was broken! They were going to rape and kill you!" Thorin said angrily ignoring Bilbo's flinches.

"I had it under control; I was just behind on one of the payments." Bilbo muttered defiantly. Thorin growled and scrubbed his face.

"You were selling yourself to pay off your aunts debts!" Thorin exploded. Bilbo's face hardened, lips tightening eyes narrowing. Bilbo ignored the shocked stares coming from the others and focused only on Thorin.

"I go to that bar and dance then I come home again. I do not sell myself." Bilbo said tightly much to everyone's relief and confusion from Thorin.

"Why did you let me believe..." Thorin trailed off as Bilbo laughed bitterly, the harsh sound unnatural on such a sweet person inside and out.

"You were the one who assumed Thorin Durin, you were the one who automatically thought I was a prostitute. I dance at the bar, I clean an office block and I work at a cafe. I don't sleep, that's how I clear the debts." Bilbo spoke with forced calm.

Fili and Kili groaned. "Way to go uncle." Fili muttered.

Bofur dragged Bilbo up and out taking him to the kitchens, Bilbo following limply. He felt wrung out and pleased to see his friends again.

Bofur made him a cup of tea and a thick sandwich loaded with chicken.

"Do you think I should stay?" Bilbo asked Bofur unsure, picking at his sandwich.

Bofur sighed wearily. "It's not up to me. But I think it would do you good to stay with us, I'll stay too of course. I've missed them all terribly." Bofur advised eyeing the bags under Bilbo's eyes and his almost gaunt frame.

Bilbo nodded slowly. "I don't think, however, that you should get together with Thorin." Bofur stated surely.

Bilbo looked ready to deny all and anything so Bofur held up a hand to prevent him from interrupting. "We've all seen the chemistry between you and Thorin, in fact if all that gang warfare stuff hadn't happened I reckon you and him would have been dating mere weeks later.

But it's not really a good relationship when he has tried to kill you when you single handed diffused the war that was about to start between gangs." Bofur sighed. "But I'm not telling you what to do, do what makes you happy, I wish you all the luck in the world." Bofur grinned and Bilbo returned it feeling happier than he had in three years.

Bofur and Bilbo had occasionally met up for a quick chat over the last three years but Bilbo hadn't seen Bofur in at least six months.

"It's good to see you again." Bilbo murmured sipping at his tea.

Slowly the others traipsed in all looking pleased with themselves. Bilbo choked when he realised why, apparently they had all in turn verbally told Thorin off...again.

Bilbo sighed looking round at his friends with amused exasperation. Yes, it was good to be back.

*Hansel and Gretel children's story, I'm relating it because the witch eventually gets impatient and decided to cook the trapped Hansel even though he supposedly isn't as fat as she wanted before she cooked him. Sort of like out of the frying pan and into the fire- out of the cage and into the oven.


	10. Chapter 10 College

21. College

Disclaimer.

Based on prompt: -Thorin and Bilbo are in different social circles and can't stand each other. Thorin thinks rich boy Bilbo has an easy life and will never work for anything he gets. Bilbo thinks bad boy Thorin has no respect and will end up in jail. Then they get paired up as partners for a school project and start to really get to know each other.  
Thorin's raising his little brothers on his own after their parents left them and he's terrified that someone will find out and take his brothers away. Landlord Balin gives him a break on rent because he helps out with repairs but he doesn't know about Fili and Kili living with him.  
Bilbo's parents barely notice he's there and when they do, it's only to demean him and if it's been a hard day, which seems to be happening a lot more lately, he knows he'll have bruises the next day.

7, p33

Warnings: Abuse, Neglect, violence, slight eating problem, mention of drugs...um... Gen.

Bilbo glared as a tall forbidding figure crashed into him on purposely knocking right into his shoulder. Bilbo glared to the back of Thorin Oakenshield, bane of his college life. Rubbing his sore shoulder Bilbo grumpily adjusted his bag strap and carried on walking to go to home. He ignored the satisfied smirk on Thorin's lips as he swaggered off comforting himself with the knowledge that Thorin would only grow up to be a thug or end up in jail.

Bilbo was rather quiet, not shy and he didn't have any really close friends. He spoke to Bofur occasionally, the boy was nice and optimistic a match for Bilbo's soft sarcasm and pessimism but it was only really a passing acquaintance; Bofur had his own friends in the same group with Thorin Oakenshield.

Bilbo trudged home reluctantly but picked up his pace, it wouldn't do to be late home, again.

Bilbo stealthily snuck into his house, if there was one thing Bilbo prided himself on it was his ability to walk soundlessly and unnoticed. His clothing choice helped in his endeavour to remain unnoticed, all dull browns and greys no bright colours, perfect for blending into the back ground.

Raised voices met his ears and Bilbo hurried along desperately attempting to get to his room without his return noted and without adding fuel to the fire, the argument already sounded horrid without him being there to fan the flames.

Heaving a sigh of relief Bilbo dropped his back pack on his bedroom floor and silently still completed the homework he hadn't finished during break and lunch time before losing himself in a large book, stories were so much better than reality.

Dinner, four hours later, was a silent affair, Bilbo earnestly trying to keep to proper decorum while attempting to stay out of mind. It was with shaking hands but a relieved smile that Bilbo left the dining room that evening, today had been lucky, for him. He pointedly ignored the bruise that marred his step-mothers face and the matching mark on his step-fathers fist; he certainly wasn't turning the negative attention onto himself!

xxx

Thorin wearily scrubbed his face lugging this weeks food shopping into the apartment he lived in along with his two nephews, more like brothers.

After his father had buggered off six months ago Thorin was doing all he could to look after his rambunctious nephews and remain undiscovered by social services, he wasn't yet eighteen and Fíli was ten while Kíli was a mere seven.

Luckily Balin, the man who owned the set of apartments let Thorin lodge there for free as long as he helped with the repairs and such; Balin knew nothing of Thorin's nephews. It was exhausting doing all the washing, cooking, cleaning, looking after Fíli and Kíli and not to mention going to college. Thorin didn't have the time to do his homework so he never bothered; it was much better if he got seven hours sleep than if he did his poxy homework.

Thorin twitched as he recalled Bilbo Baggins superior look whenever he had his homework and Thorin didn't. His revenge may have been petty but it was satisfying to knock into the rich, spoilt twerp every day as he left school. Bilbo was always so particular about his neatness; it sent satisfaction through Thorin every time he ruffled that pristine composure.

Luckily, extremely so, Thorin had a trust account from his departed grandfather that he was able to access in order to pay the gas and electricity bills as well as for food. To make the money last he and his nephews may have worn clothing on its last legs and made do with second hand stuff not bothering if there was a small rip or tear, it was still wearable.

Pulling the sheets out of the dryer Thorin reminisced about all his little revenges on Bilbo Baggins a sharp toothed grin on his face that made the unnoticed Fíli back away without even voicing his question. Today was an alright day.

xxx

Today was absolutely awful. First of all it was raining so Bilbo had trekked into school looking completely bedraggled, he hadn't dared go back into the house to retrieve a coat, he'd rather get wet than...anyway, so he started off soaking and shivering. Then he realised the rain had gotten into his bag - partially unzipped from where it (and he attached) had been dragged backwards forcibly as he tried to escape to school, so his homework was illegible. His neighbours pen exploded and he managed to get ink all over Bilbo's pristine (although sopping) white shirt.

Bilbo usually enjoyed his lunch times, he could eat as slowly as he wished, there was no tension, no fear, no danger it was incredibly relaxing. But of course in his mad dash to leave he had left his lunch in the kitchen. Then Thorin, the jerk, had slammed into him and his books had all fallen into a puddle, utterly wrecked, dirty. Bilbo could have cried, instead he glared at Thorin fists clenched to hide the trembling, he was in such trouble.

He had entered History, his absolute favourite; happily, until the teacher announced they were all doing group projects and then assigning partners. Of course Bilbo was partnered with Thorin. Bilbo forcibly restrained himself from slamming his head down onto the table like Thorin had; he imagined their twin expressions of horror were pretty similar.

Then he had been walking back home, finally having dried off and a huge truck had driven past into a puddle splashing poor Bilbo from head to foot. Bilbo wiped a tear of frustration away along with a little bit of mud and morosely continued home. Today sucked and it was about to get worse.

xxx

Today sucked toads.

First Kíli had knocked over the milk getting it everywhere and past experience said if it wasn't cleared up immediately and it festered the smell was disgusting. So Thorin had mopped up rushing his nephews ready for school fondly chucking Kíli's chin when he apologised.

Thorin, consequently ran out late and immediately was soaked having given his coat and the umbrella to the younger boys.

It had been amusing seeing the peeved expression on prissy Bilbo's face when he entered school also dripping. Doubly amusing when someone spilt ink on Bilbo, honestly his expression was hilarious.

He had felt a minor twist of shame when he accidently knocked all of Bilbo's books into a puddle rendering them useless before he reasoned to himself that Bilbo was able to easily replace them, it's not like Bilbo was hard up for money.

Not so good was the History assignment and pairing.

Thorin's head thunked onto the table, loudly. It hurt.

This meant he would have to go over to snobby Bilbo's house to complete it, no way was Bilbo going near his nephews then blabbing to social services.

Thankfully Thorin had the weekend free of any Bilbo Baggins related headaches.

xxx

Bilbo and Thorin seethed in silence for ten whole minutes before they cracked.

"Look how..."

"What are we..." They both spoke at the same time before pausing, awkwardly.

"Do go on." Bilbo politely said with a small gesture reminiscent of a shrug. But of course Bilbo was far too uptight to actually shrug Thorin sniped to himself.

"When shall we meet up at yours?" Thorin asked bluntly. Bilbo blinked dazedly.

"M-meet up? A-at mine?!" Bilbo squeaked stuttering confusedly. Thorin nodded.

"Yes, yours, for the project, history." Thorin said slowly as if talking to a halfwit. Bilbo visibly bristled hands forming fists under the table.

"I know what you meant!" Bilbo snapped spine straightening. Thorin mused whether the spine might actually snap, Bilbo was so tense. "I just wondered why you presumed we would be meeting at my house not yours." Bilbo retorted primly lips in a thin line eyes tight.

"What too snobby to have a commoner grace your stupid mansion?!" Thorin sniped crossly. Bilbo flushed, a pink hue spreading over his cheekbones.

"O-of course not! Your assumption was a little presumptuous, that's all." Bilbo bristled tightly nails biting into his palm.

"Well? What time, day, address?" Thorin asked eyebrow raised disdainfully. All at once the colour on Bilbo's face drained and he turned a little ashen.

"Surely it would be easier for you to meet up at yours? Or even the library?" Bilbo asked near desperately as though realising he had dug himself into a hole and there was no escaping. Thorin coolly assessed the nervy looking boy, intrigued. What on earth was Bilbo trying to hide? Maybe Bilbo's doting mother place baby pictures up everywhere or his drawings as a child. Thorin inwardly snorted, right, they were definitely meeting up at Bilbo's.

"Address, time, day." Thorin enunciated slowly and firmly like he had to when he had to coerce Kíli into eating his greens. Bilbo sagged for a millisecond before his posture snapped straight once more.

Silently Bilbo wrote out the address only just stilling his quaking hands. "Any day is alright. Preferably about straight after school on a school day anytime after eleven on the weekend." Bilbo muttered barely audibly face drawn tight. Thorin glanced at Bilbo confused as to where the bristling spitfire had gone, where was the indignation? Fiery retort? Bilbo was incredibly witty after all; this meekness didn't suit him nearly as well.

"Tuesday." Thorin said and they spent the rest of the lesson in utter silence.

xxx

Bilbo nervously toyed with the edge of his jumper before dropping it anxiously and looking round to make sure no one had noticed his fidgeting. Bilbo soothed his frantic heart, no one was there, he was the only one in the entrance hall. The expected knock came, twenty minutes later than expected and Bilbo had worked himself into a tizzy, he almost ran to the door before smoothing down his jumper fastidiously and calming his pace to a sedate walk.

Thorin stood scowling on the porch. "I thought you said it would be easy to find. I lost my way, twice." Thorin bit out taking out his frustration from something his nephews had done out on Bilbo. Bilbo swallowed but said nothing just silently ushered Thorin inside and hastily shutting the door.

Thorin looked around at the pristine mansion, not a speck of dust or anything out of place. He suppressed the urge to grab some mud and smear it on the walls, or knock over some furniture.

He followed Bilbo's slight figure up two flights of stairs, all covered in a thick creamy carpet that made Thorin want to scrunch his socked toes into, down a long corridor and into what must be Bilbo's room.

It was only as they entered it that Thorin realised how utterly still the house was, it wasn't the calm silence of respite but an odd anticipatory silence that left you inching nervously round the corners in fear of what lay beyond. It also dawned on him how silently Bilbo was moving, not a whisper of clothes brushing against one another or the quiet tap of feet muffled by the carpet was audible.

Thorin ignored the odd quirks and they quickly settled down to do their project, which included a heck of a lot of verbal banter, sniping and fast retorts. Thorin almost found himself smiling instead of scowling something he caught Bilbo doing as well. When you listened to the actual words ignoring the bite their conversations were funny.

As eight o-clock approached Bilbo noticeably became stiffer and stiffer. He was almost quaking as he led Thorin to the dining room hands once again in fists to control his tremors. Thorin seemed to disregard the oddness but eyed him speculatively when his retorts trailed off into pathetic imitations.

Thorin sat down awkwardly at the posh dining table, unnecessarily large. Soon after Bilbo and Thorin were seated a tall woman, impeccably dressed arrived a slight dash of make up accentuating her stunning features, not a hair out of place out of her simple but stylish hair do. She looked nothing like Bilbo. She gave a wan, cordial smile in Thorin's direction and Thorin responded to the frosty smile with the barest turn up of his lips.

A man entered breaking the awkward silence that had remained. Oddly enough this didn't seem to relieve Bilbo. The man eyed Thorin disdainfully turning his nose up at the ratty jeans and t-shirt Thorin wore. Bilbo near flinched when the man turned an accusatory look in his direction.

This man didn't look a thing like Bilbo either. Where Bilbo was round cheeked, curly haired, small in stature and comely handsome, charming in the boy next door kind of way, the man was tall, with an aristocratic bearing.

Both the man and the woman had dark hair and eyes while Bilbo was dark honey blond with blue eyes, both had pointed faces while Bilbo had a round warm face and both seemed to disdain Thorin's presence.

Both struck Thorin as icy, with their forbidding cold closed off features whereas Bilbo was warm, a campfire that would snap and crackle but be mainly warming and welcome.

Dinner passed in silence and Thorin didn't even notice what he was eating. He wasn't going to break the silence and every time he tried (he tried twice) Bilbo shot him a quelling look turning wide eyes to the man before focussing on his food again.

It was when the man stood and dismissed them that Thorin noticed Bilbo had barely eaten and once again his fists were clenched tightly. Thorin had thought Bilbo's fists clenched was him attempting not to punch someone but looking at the tension in his shoulders and the faint tremors Thorin thought it was more to stop him from visibly shaking. But why?

Bilbo was showing him out and Thorin decided just to ask a question, quietly though, it felt like someone was observing them. "Your parents don't look like you." Thorin stated bluntly waiting for Bilbo to expand. Bilbo's lips twisted and he looked around carefully.

"No, they're my step-parents. My parents died when I was six." Bilbo near whispered eyes still flitting about anxiously. Thorin nodded that would explain the differences, although some kids looked nothing like one of their parents there was usually a feature or two that was the same.

Thorin still lost in thoughts absently said goodbye and started walking down the long curved driveway. The door closed behind him with a quiet snap and Thorin paused for a moment as he could have sworn he heard the loud sound of flesh slapping against flesh, brutally and a short sharp cry of pain. When silence met his ears he dismissed it and carried on home, trying in vain for the nagging feeling in his gut to disappear.

xxx

Bilbo was silent the next day at school and paler than usual moving stiffly for some reason and Thorin felt the sinking feeling in his gut solidify. There was something odd going on.

A couple of days later (and another carton of spilt milk) Thorin and Bilbo once again were in their history classroom supposed to be trying to complete their project.

"What time is good for you meeting at yours?" Bilbo asked for once forgoing pleasantries and stating unvoiced that Thorin wasn't going to Bilbo's house this time. Thorin would have argued but Bilbo's house (and the man and woman) were creepy and he couldn't miss the tinge of desperation in Bilbo's voice and face. So he agreed silently, he would just have to lie and say his nephews were visiting, not living there or that his dad was working late. Something.

Thorin shrugged. "Tomorrow?" He asked not too fussed. Bilbo nodded squaring his shoulders as they went back to their project cough-banter-cough.

xxx

Thorin managed to get Fíli and Kíli to promise to be on their best behaviour and had tidied the apartment ready for Bilbo to come round.

Dead on four o-clock a quiet tap came from the door and before Thorin could answer it Kíli was already tearing over in a rush to open the door that never saw visitors. Thorin groaned, how many times had he told Kíli to never, ever answer the door?

He made his way over startled to see Bilbo dressed in tan coloured turtle neck and nondescript jeans, all impeccable and obviously more expensive than his own clothes but not the stuffy ties and shirts or outrageously expensive garb he assumed Bilbo wore outside of school.

He came over to see Kíli chatting happily to Bilbo while Bilbo stood with a smile on his face contentedly listening and nodding at all the right times. Amused eyes looked up to meet with Thorin's and Bilbo flashed a grin before turning his attention back to Kíli. Kíli seemed absolutely thrilled to have someone listening to him sincerely that wasn't Fíli or Thorin, for some odd reason Bilbo seemed nearly equally thrilled to be talked to.

Half an hour later Fíli rescued them by dragging Kíli away saying Thorin and Bilbo needed to do their work and shouldn't Kíli have already completed his homework by now? With a sheepish grin towards Thorin and a warm smile to Bilbo Kíli scampered off to do said homework.

Thorin rolled his eyes and offered Bilbo a seat in the lounge area. Bilbo who had relaxed slightly at Kíli's enthusiastic babble was slightly less at ease now but less tense than when he had first arrived.

"Your brother is adorable." Bilbo commented smiling in the direction Kíli had disappeared.

"You wouldn't say that if you lived with him." Thorin grinned. "But he's not my brother, he and Fíli are my nephews." Thorin explained. Bilbo nodded curiosity evident in his blue eyes. "Dad won't be home until later so you'll miss him." Thorin remarked faux casually eyeing Bilbo's reaction carefully; he did not want his nephews to be taken away from him by social workers! He and they were healthy and happy, it would kill Fíli and Kíli to be separated from each other and Thorin would not let that happen.

Bilbo, oddly enough, relaxed a little more at Thorin's comment, Thorin chalked it up to the awkwardness of meeting peoples parents.

"It's good they got to live with you." Bilbo remarked earnestly. "I haven't seen my cousins in years." Bilbo absently continued in a wistful tone, he barely remembered his beloved cousins whom he had last seen when he was six, but he remembered the fun they had, the warm contentment when they were all playing together.

Thorin relaxed slightly, he wasn't about to trust Bilbo with his secrets but it seemed should some things slip that Bilbo wouldn't go to social services about it.

They continued with the project until Kíli came in complaining about being hungry. Thorin startled glanced at the clock and realised they had been sitting and working (chatting) for over two hours!

Thorin left Bilbo in the lounge area while he went to fix an easy meal of pasta and cheese, not fancy but good enough.

He glanced back every few minutes to see Kíli talking to Bilbo again and smiled unconsciously.

He came into the area to announce that dinner was ready to see Fíli and Kíli sitting on the sofa eyes round in awe as Bilbo told them a story, weaving in enough gore and heroism to appease his rambunctious nephews. He hated to interrupt but dinner was ready. He cleared his throat and Bilbo startled nearly falling out of chair as his head whipped round relaxing minutely as he saw Thorin and only Thorin.

"Dinner." Thorin announced brusquely. Kíli grinned and ran into the kitchen area while Fíli stared at Bilbo mournfully.

"Don't worry; I'm sure I can finish the story at a later date. Our project isn't completed yet." Bilbo said with a fond smile as Fíli too rushed off to eat. Thorin could have been annoyed at Bilbo's assumption that they would be working at his apartment but it was far less hassle for him, he didn't like leaving Fíli and Kíli alone-what if something happened?- and Bilbo and he had been far more relaxed here than Bilbo's. Thorin absently wondered why as he and Bilbo made their way to the kitchen area.

Thorin groaned and Bilbo grinned as they saw a plate of grated cheese upside down on the floor and an argument brewing.

"Uncle! It wasn't me I swear! It was Fíli!" Kíli exclaimed pointing a finger at Fíi. Fíli bristled.

"No it wasn't you knocked it off!"

"Only 'cause you were hogging it!"

"I was taking some! You could've waited your turn!"

Thorin pinched the bridge of his nose; honestly, their 'good behaviour' had barely lasted two hours! Just as he was about to halt the argument that looked increasingly likely to end up in blows a calm voice stopped them.

"Now, now there is nothing to be upset by! Look." Bilbo said loud enough to be heard and with enough force to his words that Fíli and Kíli shut up instantly. Bilbo quickly put the fallen cheese in the bin, plate in the sink, fished out some more cheese from the fridge and neatly and efficiently grated some more onto two separate plates before handing the equal sized plates of grated cheese each to Fíli and Kíli. Fíli and Kíli instantly appeased at being given _their own_ _cheese_ each quietened and dug in enthusiastically.

Thorin shut his open mouth and sent a thankful smile Bilbo's way, usually he ended up shouting at the boys and the rest of the meal ended in a sulky silence, but Bilbo had diffused the argument leaving Fíli and Kíli happy and crisis averted.

Thorin noticed that despite the fact it was just plain pasta and cheese and not the fancy fair served at Bilbo's Bilbo ate his entire portion quite happily, not just picking at it like he had at Bilbo's house.

Bilbo was officially Thorin's life saver. Not only had he aborted the crisis from earlier but he managed to get Kíli to eat all of his greens. _He managed to get Kíli to eat all of his greens_. Kíli, the same boy who went round school widening his big innocent eyes and proclaiming he was allergic to vegetables (Thorin did not fall for it at first...honest). Bilbo promised to tell the rest of the story so long as Kíli ate the nasty, poisonous broccoli.

It was later as Bilbo was telling the rest of the story while Thorin washed up and Bilbo dried and put away the dishes that Thorin noticed something odd. Bilbo while seeming enraptured in telling the story was sending increasingly fearful glances at the clock. It was barely seven, why was he so nervy? Maybe he had a curfew? Still seven seemed a tad too early of one and surely Bilbo's step-parents wouldn't mind Bilbo being a little late back?

He shook off his thoughts as Bilbo finished the story, without rushing the ending and left hastily but saying a warm goodbye to Fíli and Kíli.

"I like him, can we keep him?" Fíli asked as the door snapped closed behind Bilbo. Thorin laughed, ruffling his nephew's hair fondly.

xxx

Bilbo walked out of school and tensed ready for the slamming into his shoulder that never came. Instead Thorin walked next to him companionably, not slamming into his shoulder and not smirking at him. Bilbo gave a warm answering smile to Thorin's.

"So are you coming round tomorrow so we can complete the project?" Thorin asked hopefully grinning at Bilbo's affirmative. Neither mentioned that they didn't strictly need to meet up to finish it.

And so it continued.

"Fíli and Kíli are whining to hear more of your stories. You have to come round they're destroying my eardrums..."

"You coming?..."

"Today?..."

Etc. And Bilbo although knowing the excuses were complete bullshit just smiled and came round to the apartment quite happily.

xxx

Bilbo grinned picking up one of his books and absently stroking the spine. Thorin wasn't as thuggish as Bilbo had first assumed, he was gruff and took offense easily but it was fun bantering with him and the way he looked after his nephews was well...cute.

In all the time Bilbo had visited there had been no mention of the absentee dad 'late from work' humpf Bilbo snorted, the dad was long gone. Bilbo was quite astute and sharp, he saw Thorin bringing sheets out of the washer/dryer, painting over the cracks in the ceiling, shopping for food stuffs and paying bills. There was no adult, Thorin was alone looking after his two younger nephews and Bilbo was dammed if he let the social services know.

He thought it was brilliant that Thorin was looking after his nephews making sure the three of them were together, yes it was difficult but they were happier than they would be in foster care.

It was nice having a friend.

xxx

Thorin tucked Fíli and Kíli into bed ignoring their protests that they were too old for this with a fond ruffle of their hair. Not many people had children when they were sixteen but Thorin tried his dammdest.

xxx

Bilbo startled as Thorin sat next to him in the library during their lunch break. Bilbo sent a hesitant but warm smile in Thorin's direction. The unusualness of Thorin's actions vaguely unsettled Bilbo but he squashed the apprehension down, Thorin was his friend.

But Smaug and Shelob were his 'parents'. A nagging pessimistic voice in the back of his head whispered poisoning Bilbo's hard won peace.

Thorin frowned as gloomy thoughts crossed Bilbo's mind, the boy was an open book his every emotion obvious. Thorin shook his head fondly; it was an oddly endearing trait of Bilbo's. Thorin gently nudged Bilbo's elbow to get him out of his melancholy thoughts. Bilbo jumped at the unexpected contact shying away rather visibly.

Thorin frowned at the violent reaction to such a small tap but returned the nervy smile sent his way.

"Join me for lunch." Thorin commanded with a smile. It would be nice for Bilbo to meet and talk to his other friends, Thorin was sure they would get along. Bilbo rolled his eyes.

"Of course, my liege." Bilbo said sarcastically reopening his book and pretending to carry on reading a small smile flickering on his lips.

Suddenly, his bag was placed unceremoniously on his lap, on top of the book obscuring his view of the page. Bilbo glowered at Thorin who was sitting there smugly.

"Hurry up."

"Fine." Bilbo muttered choosing to pick his battles; Thorin could be infuriatingly stubborn at times.

So Bilbo found himself joining Thorin's group for lunch, they were rowdy but kind hearted. It was nice, Bilbo thought as he sent a warm smile in response to Bofur's cheeky grin.

xxx

Bilbo cursed. It was such an unusual reaction from the normally calm and collected boy that Fili dropped his book, Kili his pen and Thorin stared.

Fili, Kili and Thorin laughed when they saw that Bilbo had just spilt his cup of tea down himself, they knew his fastidiousness with his clothing and stuff. Bilbo scowled, he didn't want to return to the house with a ruined shirt...again.

Thorin rolled his eyes. "I'll lend you one of my shirts, just take that off and leave it to dry by the oven." Thorin said. Bilbo nodded and made his way to the bathroom Thorin again rolling his eyes at Bilbo's reluctance to remove clothing in front of others.

Thorin barged into the bathroom without knocking a shirt of his that was too small slung over his arm. He stopped abruptly when he caught sight of Bilbo's unclad torso. Bilbo's severely bruised unclad torso. Bilbo stared back at Thorin eyes wide with panic.

Thorin held out the shirt and Bilbo swiftly donned it eyes avoidin Thorin's gaze.

"That wasn't done at college, was it." Thorin said rhetorically. Bilbo shook his head in negative. Thorin speared him with an intense look.

"You ever need to escape you're welcome here. Bring your stuff, I don't mind. The boys will love it." Thorin offered. Bilbo's eyes widened a small flicker of hope dancing in their depths, a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth.

"I couldn't ask that of you." Bilbo said declining.

Thorin shrugged. "The offers open ended." Thorin said before leaving the bathroom, only just catching the fervent 'thanks' Bilbo uttered.

Thorin rejoined the boys not mentioning anything when Bilbo appeared five minutes later an utterly happy smile on his face. Thorin wouldn't press Bilbo to live with them, it was Bilbo's choice even if he would like to personally murdered Bilbo's step-mother and step-father, some of the hand shaped bruises were too small to be from Smaug. Thorin trusted that if it got any worse, or that if Bilbo had had enough he would come and live with Thorin, Fili and Kili. He couldn't force Bilbo to do anything, not when Bilbo was keeping Fili and Kili a secret for him.

xxx

Everything was fine for a while, college continued normally and Bilbo went to Thorin's after college nearly every day.

It was fine until it wasn't.

Thorin's lunch group of friends, including Bilbo, was hauled in front of the principle and accused of something they didn't do! It took one look at the smirking Azog sitting in the corner to know who planted the drugs in a couple of their jackets and then the parents were called.

Thorin claimed his father was working abroad for a few days, and as Thorin was sixteen it wasn't technically illegal for Thorin to be left by himself. Once Thorin's excuse had been partially accepted (not without many glowers) Thorin turned worried eyes to Bilbo who was sitting there face white and frozen.

The teachers had called Smaug and Shelob.

Thorin placed a hand on Bilbo's shoulder comfortingly; Bilbo jumped turning startled eyes to Thorin before leaning into the hand Bilbo's whole body trembling minutely.

Then the parents started trickling in one by one each looking furious in their own way the college counsellor, Saruman, sat quietly in the corner watching everyone's reactions eyes lingering curiously on Thorin and Bilbo.

Gloin scowled looking just like his father and elder brother, Groin and Oin. Bofur, Bifur and Bombur looked worried, their mother looked worried as well, their father was tied up at work so couldn't come. Ori stood with his guardians and brothers, Dori and Nori, Dori was glaring furiously at the teachers while Nori looked nonchalant but his quick, clever eyes were scanning everyone and everything.

Balin was eventually called much to Thorin's pique. He arrived with his much younger brother Dwalin, an intimidating figure covered in tattoos. An odd man in grey also followed them in looking more like he had randomly decided to enter the room than actually being part of the meeting.

Last but certainly not least Smaug and Shelob swept into the room looking no less elegant and well put together as when Thorin joined them and Bilbo for tea that one time. Thorin felt Bilbo's shudder. Everyone in the office seemed slightly cowed by Smaug and Shelob's dramatic entrance.

"I have been called from a serious and rather important phone call. Do proceed to tell me what on earth is going on." Smaug drawled, arrogance and disdain dripping from every syllable. Bilbo shrank into Thorin's side slightly. The teacher looked discomforted by Smaug but explained why they had been called in.

"So you mean to say" Smaug began once the teacher trailed off. "That my step-son, a boy who gets near perfect marks in everything has been accused of drug dealing?" Smaug finished silkily. Bilbo stared at his shoes.

"W-well they all have some evidence against them." The teacher stammered.

"I-it w-w-was m-me." Bilbo piped up sounding so utterly innocent it was untrue. Thorin stared at Bilbo incredulously. "It's totally and completely my fault. T-they didn't kn-know what it was." Bilbo tried to convince them all that the others were innocent.

Nori snorted. "Sure kid and I'm the president. None of the kids have the appropriate stains on their fingers or the inclination for drug dealing. The stuff's been planted, it's not even drugs just the stuff sold to nitwits. It's oregano." Nori said. "I give you points for trying though, kid." Nori said with a nod to Bilbo.

Bilbo frowned. "Isn't oregano a cooking herb?" He asked. Nori grinned all sharp teeth and knife edge smile and nodded.

"Sure is. I like this one. Ori, you have a good choice in friends, not so sure of the rest though." Nori winked at the now scowling faces. Ori and Bilbo looked at ground their faces crimson. Dori elbowed Nori.

Bilbo chanced a look at Smaug and flinched. Smaug was fuming, absolutely furious.

"I think I need to have a private chat with Bilbo." Smaug said dragging Bilbo out of the room. Bilbo looked with panic stricken eyes to Thorin but Thorin was too busy talking to Balin, whom it seemed had just found out about Fili and Kili living in the apartment with Thorin.

Thorin looked around wiping a hand across his face wearily. As if the drugs accusation wasn't enough! Balin had found out about Fili and Kili and Smaug looked absolutely furious at Bilbo.

Hang on! Where was Bilbo and Smaug? Thorin looked around panicked ignoring Balin for the moment.

"Where's Bilbo?" Thorin demanded urgently blanching when he got an answer. Thorin ran to the door to try to get to Bilbo but was stopped by a harsh grip to his arm.

"They're just chatting, no need to get so worked up." Shelob said silkily her strong grip on Thorin's arm belying her slight frame.

"There is need to get worked up when your husband uses him as a punching bag!" Thorin near yelled silencing everyone in the room.

The councillor Saruman leapt to his feet heading towards the door just as Thorin escaped from Shelob's grip. Everyone in the room seemed to be of the same mind, making sure an innocent child wasn't harmed. They through open the door and stopped stunned.

There just in front of them, in the hallway was Bilbo standing still a fresh bruise across his face, a broken arm and clothing crooked with an utterly smug grin plastered over his face. Lying on the floor was a knocked out Smaug, tell tale bruised knuckles and Bilbo's school tie held tightly in his hand. The odd grey clad man was standing to the side surveying Bilbo with a mixture of sadness and pride, a length of rope in his hands attached to Smaug's wrist.

Thorin rushed forward and carefully but tightly hugged Bilbo, Bilbo returning the embrace.

"Is the offer still open, can I live with you?" Bilbo asked Thorin the grin on his face not abating.

They all trailed back into the room to hear the story, the teacher looking quite faint. Oin, who was a doctor and had been on his charity rounds before being called in by his father Groin encase Gloin had actually taken drugs had his medical kit and was patching up Bilbo. Thankfully it was a clean break so he could wrap it up there and then. Bilbo swung his legs (that didn't quite reach the floor from his chair) idly watching Oin, and wondering why he wasn't screaming in pain.

"It's because you're in slight shock, laddie, adrenalin also numbs the pain something fierce, sometimes this sort of thing happens, be thankful. Don't worry you'll be able to feel it soon enough." Oin said putting a blanket around Bilbo's shoulders.

Did I say that out loud? Bilbo mused, he hadn't meant to. Laughs caught his attention and Bilbo flushed, he hadn't meant to speak his thoughts out loud!

"What happened? I looked around and you were gone and so was Smaug..." Thorin paused for breath.

"Well Smaug dragged me out the room, he punched me I fought back, I got hold of a staff that was just lying on the floor and smacked Smaug over the head with it. He crumpled to the floor the this man said well done and tied him up." Bilbo explained succinctly. Thorin made a face like he had sucked on a lemon.

"The more detailed version." Thorin ordered voice low. Bilbo nibbled his lip but relented.

"Smaug dragged me out of the room, he held me up by the throat against the hallway wall, my tie caught in his grip, hissing at me that I shouldn't be in this sort of mess and on how it would reflect on Smaug. He punched me in the face and I sort of kicked him between the legs then he flung me on the ground; I think that's when my arm broke...I felt an odd bit of woodunder my hand and picked it up finding it to be an odd grey staff" Here Bilbo paused and looked suspiciously at the grey clad man.

Smaug wasn't watching me he was sort of rolling around on the ground and then I stood up and hit him round the head with the staff...three or four times..." Bilbo muttered the last but Thorin and Nori barked out a laugh at it.

"Well done." Thorin said simply, Bilbo beamed at him.

"Excuse me, sir, are you Gandalf?" Bilbo hesitantly asked the grey clad man. The man nodded.

"And you're Bilbo Baggins, Belladonna Took's son." Gandalf said holding the rope with Smaug's wrists tied in one hand and a handcuffed to his write while the other cuff was attached to Shelob.

"I haven't seen you in years!" Bilbo exclaimed.

"And that if far more my fault than anything else's. I assumed you were happy, my dear boy. Anyway what do you say about living with me? Along with three other boys, one Fili, Kili and a Thorin Durin." Gandalf said looked with amused eyes at both Bilbo and Thorin.

Thorin stiffened before looking at Gandalf warily. "You're not going to split Fili and Kili up?" Thorin asked sceptically.

"No, I'm not going to take you four away from each other. I dare say you've done a better job than I ever could at raising young Fili and Kili by yourself for all this time." Gandalf answered a kindly twinkle in his grey eyes.

Thorin looked a little relieved but still sceptical. Bilbo squeezed his arm keeping a hold of Thorin. Thorin looked down and nodded, he would do his best to keep his nephews and Bilbo safe and if that meant trusting in an odd man dressed in grey, well so be it.

Bilbo grinned. "Gandalf always has the best fireworks...don't you Gandalf." Bilbo said slyly grinning at Gandalf's discomfited look. Gandalf's famous fireworks were fireworks that Gandalf had illegally tweaked.

Nori laughed.


	11. Chapter 11 Office

22. Office

PastSmaug+Bilbo PastNori+Bilbo.

Um...

Disclaimer.

Warnings: Dubious/Non Consensual sex, Slash, abusive relationships.

Thorin, or 'Oakenshield', scowled, Smaug was running rings around them just because he could...the wanker.

And they had no new leads.

Thorin sighed getting up from his desk and heading towards the break room for a large, caffeine filled cup of bitter brew. Dwalin, his second hand man, 'battleaxe', came with him.

They had once been the cream of Mi5, the main agents. They were titled the Company, all fourteen of them worked together like a well oiled machine. There was Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Oin, Gloin, Ori, Nori, Dori, Dwalin, Balin, Fili, Kili, Frerin and Thorin. They were legends untila mission went wrong.

Something happened but none of them knew what. All they knew was the once group of fourteen was now thirteen and that they had been compromised. After the thirteen had had time to grieve for Frerin (and heal) they were stuck in desk jobs for Mi5, chasing paper trails and cold cases. The only reason they were doing it instead of the police was because of the politics involved, the high level damage/lives involved and they needed to have access to certain files to even begin to solve the cases.

It couldn't be called dull but it was not what they had trained for. Fili and Kili at least were always pulling pranks to ease their boredom.

Thorin held his coffee as if it was a lifeline, well, it was essential for their line of work.

A grey clad figure entering Thorin's line of vision made Thorin groan and long to throw his mug at the wall. Gandalf, or 'storm crow', was an amazing asset, to those who didn't have to deal with the man. His hints were good, his leads excellent, his work flawless but he loved speaking in riddles, Thorin hated riddles.

Thorin groaned again when he saw that Gandalf was beaming.

"I've got you an impeccable lead on Smaug. Someone who, quite possibly, knows more of the ins and outs of Smaug's operations than Smaug does." Gandalf said nearly bouncing on the balls of his feet.

"And how do we know that this 'insider' isn't actually working for Smaug?" Thorin asked eyebrow raised. That was the trouble with spies, or informants, you could never really trust in their loyalty since they had already turned turncoat once before and could easily do so again.

"I can vouch for his character, he's a good man and he thoroughly disapproves of Smaug's dealings. He also has a grudge on Smaug." Gandalf said still looking like a child on a sugar rush. Thorin sighed. He would listen to the informant but that didn't mean he would do anything with the information if he couldn't trust the informant.

"Fine. Tomorrow nine am sharp." Thorin said clipped before turning on his heal and leaving the room.

"My, he's in a bad temper." Gandalf muttered to himself, Dwalin grunted.

"Nice scarf Mr. Gandalf, sir." Ori said with a nod towards Dwalin as he rushed along a heavy stack of paper in his arms.

Gandalf fingered his pink scarf with a fond smile. "Thank you Ori." Gandalf replied before turning to Dwalin. "Do inform Thorin I'll bring my informant around noon." Gandalf said before leaving swiftly. Dwalin groaned, now he had to tell Thorin that Gandalf had rearranged the meeting time. Great. Dalin downed his coffee, just great. He groused to himself.

xxx

Bilbo Baggins swallowed, then swallowed again, he couldn't believe he was going to do this. I must be mad, he thought to himself, indulging in the whims of a wizard. Bilbo sighed and straightened his perfectly neat tie and picked up the documents slipping the really important ones into a hidden sleeve under his shirt, you could never be too careful.

xxx

Gandalf strode into the waiting area of The Company's offices a reluctant but not showing it Bilbo Baggins trailing at his heals. Bilbo straightened his cuffs running an anxious hand over his lapels before stilling any telling fidgeting and placing on a mask of cool efficiency.

Thorin scowled, blasted wizard, it was well past two and edging closer to three by the time Gandalf made an appearance. Thorin eyed the man trailing behind Gandalf with barely stifled disdain before he stepped into the waiting room.

"He looks more like a baker than an informant." Thorin said to Gandalf before turning to the short man at his side. Bilbo just raised an unimpressed eyebrow before looking round.

"I'm here to speak to the boss of The Company." Bilbo said in clipped clear tones, brisk, professional and somewhat cold, all things Smaug had taught him to be. Thorin scowled at the slight.

"I'm the boss. So, speak." Thorin ordered. Bilbo ran a sceptical glance over Thorin eyes managing to pick out the small coffee stain on his shirt, a near unnoticable burn in the cuff of his sleeve and a hole he didn't know he had in his jacket in one quick glance. Bilbo was certainly observant, Thorin would have given him that if the observance hadn't been an obvious and intended slight.

"As you command." Bilbo drawled gliding into Thorin's office without further ado, or permission. Thorin clenched his teeth, he could hear Fili, Kili and a few others sniggering, even Dwalin looked amused. Gandalf clapped his hands together and followed the diminutive man.

Thorin entered his office closing the door with an audible snap and halting the whispered conversation between Gandalf and the informant.

"Here is all the relevant information to your current investigations." Bilbo said handing over a thick folder to Thorin. Thorin eyed it warily and Bilbo with suspicion before he opened the folder and began a quick scan of the documents. As he read Thorin could feel his eyebrows rise incredulously and his eyes widen in surprise. Thorin leapt to his feet and opened the office door.

"Ori, Nori, Dwalin, Balin and Gloin. Get in here five seconds ago!" Thorin bellowed. The five mentioned rushed in nearly colliding at the door in order to get there as quickly as possible. A slight skew of Bilbo's lips betrayed his amusement before his face lapsed back into its calculating efficiency.

Bilbo stared at Nori for a second before moving his gaze away nothing in his face betraying his thoughts except for the small glimmer of recognition in the depths of his eyes.

Thorin excitedly showed the others the file, Gloin working out the stats in a split second while Balin and Dwalin discussed potential ways to destroy Smaug's influence/networks, Ori was scribbling a few things down that looked like names and places while Nori added scraps of information to each name, like whether they had a criminal record etc.

Bilbo went back to his hushed discussion with Gandalf.

Eventually Thorin sat back in his chair and the five he had called in turned around to stare at Bilbo. Nori waved.

"Nice to see you again." He greeted Bilbo with a smirk.

"The pleasures mine." Bilbo drawled a slight slash of the lips hinting at a returning smirk before it once again disappeared. Thorin eyed Nori, he would get how Nori knew the man later, now there was more important things to focus on.

"How did you get all this information?" Thorin asked eyes once again narrowed in suspicion, you know the saying: if it looks too good to be true then it is...

Bilbo tightened his lips. "I am very high up in the organisation and close to others even higher. I have access to some very confidential codes and some very confidential places." Bilbo said not answering the question to Thorin's satisfaction. Nori spoke before Thorin could.

"How high are the others?" Nori asked eyes narrowed in thought as he scanned Bilbo.

Bilbo shrugged lightly, the very picture of ease. "The top of the top." Bilbo stated with a deprecating smile eyes curiously blank. Nori sucked in a breath.

"You poor sod." Nori half whispered. "You stupid, stupid man." Nori went over to Bilbo and lightly tapped his head grabbing him in a quick hug that Bilbo just as quickly escaped from.

"I thought you learned your lesson last time." Nori said. Bilbo smiled blankly.

"You can't teach an old dog new tricks." Bilbo quoted. Nori snorted.

"You're hardly old; you're what, barely twenty-two?" Nori shook his head.

"Twenty-three." Bilbo responded moving towards the door. "If they need anything else or more clarification then you know how to contact me." Bilbo said to Gandalf before leaving.

"Wait! Where do you think you're going!" Thorin shouted rushing out the office but Bilbo had already disappeared. "Son of a Bitch." Thorin cursed.

"Do not insult Bilbo's mother, Thorin, she was a great woman and her son is a great man." Gandalf cautioned none of his usual cheer in his voice. Thorin turned to Nori.

"Explain." Thorin ordered briskly. Nori paused clearly undecided. "Explain." Thorin hissed out. Nori nodded clipped and his face blanked. Great, Nori wasn't going to tell them all.

"I knew Bilbo since he was sixteen. He was well known even then as a...particuarly good thief." Nori began carefully, Thorin narrowed his eyes there was more Nori wasn't saying but he knew the man well enough that he wouldn't be able to pry anymore today.

"He got involved with the wrong sort...Azog took a fancy to the little thief. Bilbo was coerced, I believe, to stay. He didn't have an active part in the organisation, in fact beyond a few thefts he had nothing to do with it.

Bilbo was looking for an escape barely two years into it and he found one, obviously.

He got involved with Smaug's organisation. I didn't know how involved until today. I knew he was pretty high up though." Nori took in a deep breath before releasing it explosively. "He's Smaug's right hand." Nori scowled at the wall.

Thorin turned suspicious eyes towards the information Bilbo had gifted them. "So the information's false." Thorin stated an irritated scowl on his face. Both Nori and Gandalf glared at him.

"You don't know Bilbo, he wouldn't, he wouldn't go to all this trouble to just..." Nori stopped his usual slick tongue faltering. Thorin eyed him that was usually a sign of Nori speaking of those he counted as family.

Gandalf cleared his throat. "I can guaranty that information is pure gold, utterly priceless. I can also guaranty that Bilbo didn't give you everything." Gandalf said in a sure tone.

xxx

In a hidden room, not three blocks away. Bilbo Baggins thumped the table in frustration. He knew bugging Thorin's office was a good idea; he just didn't expect Nori or Gandalf to spill so many of his secrets. At least he still had the main ones unknown.

xxx

Smaug laced his fingers together under his chin.

It was fifteen minutes later that he moved. He straightened himself standing from his chair in one swift move before striding through his office relishing in the half awed half fearful looks he gained from his subordinates. He abruptly entered the office that was second to none but his own.

The man who had been seated before Smaug entered got to his feat quickly but not hastily a bland expression on his handsome face.

Smaug moved forward crowding the man and making the man have to crane up his head to maintain eye contact. Smaug relished in the feeling, he was so much taller, so much more in control.

Slowly Smaug gripped the man's face between his hands and leaned his face down breathing on the man's lips. Carefully and almost gently although definitely controlling Smaug tilted the man's head to one side easily slotting his own lips onto the smaller man's. Smaug pushed his tongue into the other man's mouth, it was Smaug who nipped at the lips and it was Smaug who ended the kiss.

"I've locked the door already, Bilbo." Smaug said even though Bilbo knew he hadn't and never did.

xxx

Thorin frowned at the papers. "Ori, do me a file on Bilbo Baggins. As thorough as possible, I want to know what he ate for breakfast twelve years ago. All clearances." Thorin stated handing Ori a special and completely confidential card long with a chip.

It was two hours later that Thorin realised his room had been bugged. Thorin eyed the bug ready to crush the tiny thing between his thumb and forefinger before an idea got his attention.

"Bilbo Baggins, I expect you to meet here tomorrow at three in the afternoon." Thorin spoke clearly his anger visible in the harsh tense lines of his body and the tight control of his voice. Thorin breathed out once and smashed the bug in his hand.

xxx

Thorin eyed the woefully thin files Ori had given him. "Is this it?" Thorin asked incredulously.

Ori fidgeted but nodded handing back the card. "It's all I could get with this clearance. And the information seemed to be hiding itself and a sort of virus was installed in the information that means once you crack past a little of it it learns and makes the next bit harder or different. It's fascinating and I'd love to meet whoever designed it but it means I have a limited time with each bit of information and can only decode a small amount before it disappears again." Ori stopped rambling when Thorin nodded.

"Terribly sorry, Ori, but the person who invented it is dead." A voice commented from the entrance to Thorin's office. Thorin snapped his head up, Bilbo Baggins should not have been able to access this far into the building with Thorin not aware, but he had.

Bilbo smiled kindly at Ori. "My mother invented it; she did so want to keep her family safe. It's only too bad it couldn't keep everyone at bay. Mi5 ruined my mother." Bilbo smiled blankly. "I would however be happy to speak about it to my limited ability, I understand it's workings and would be happy to show you her notes so long as you keep it a secret from certain government organisations." Bilbo offered much to Ori's delight.

"You bugged my office." Thorin growled pointing a finger at Bilbo. Bilbo shrugged.

"And..." Bilbo drawled.

"You do know that bugging my office can have you in jail for at the very least a couple of years." Thorin said one eyebrow raised. Bilbo sighed looking and sounding suddenly tired, far too tired for a twenty-three year old.

"If all my crimes were tallied up my skeleton wouldn't leave prison until it turned to dust. I have one agenda on my list, Thorin, and only one." Bilbo said seriously eyes boring into Thorin. "I want to see and watch Smaug's empire crumble beneath his feet, I want to see him dead and then and only then will I be content to die, I have no desire to go to prison. I wouldn't mind just disappearing but I am far to realistic to believe I will survive the encounters or that your government doesn't want me subdued."

Thorin sat in silence after Bilbo's small but passionate speech. There was a burning drive in Bilbo's eyes to see Smaug die and Thorin didn't know what would happen when that drive was quenched, it seemed it was all that was keeping Bilbo going.

A sudden scuffle had Thorin turning to the door. Bilbo didn't even have the decency to look surprised that Nori had been eavesdropping.

"Nori, I would like to thank you." Bilbo said voice flat. Nori sighed entering the room standing beside Bilbo. "You told them less than I expected but more than I wanted. So I thank you for balancing your friendship with me and your companionship here and your duty." Bilbo smiled weakly at Nori but it was the first true smile Thorin had seen grace that face.

Nori hugged Bilbo tightly but with care. It surprised Thorin, Nori wasn't usually so touchy feely, even with Ori. This time Bilbo didn't squirm out of the embrace but leaned into it seeming to relish the positive human contact.

When Nori eventually pulled away Bilbo reached behind himself and pulled a folder from the back of his shirt and handed it to Thorin. It was only then that Thorin noticed Bilbo wore at least two t-shirts under his shirt as well as a very thin bullet proof vest. Thorin took the smaller file and flicked through it inhaling in a sharp gasp.

Nori didn't let go of Bilbo fully, instead he seemed to support some of Bilbo's weight as he came round to look at the file too. Bilbo leaned on Nori eyes slipping closed involuntarily.

Thorin quickly called everyone into the room and Nori, eyes wide with the information Bilbo had just given them, dragged Bilbo to a corner propping him against his shoulder and the wall.

The Company read through the information in silence.

Bilbo's phone buzzed and Bilbo groaned tiredly scrubbing his face before eyeing the caller id. It came up with nothing, which was just as revealing as a name would be.

"Could I ask everyone in the room to be silent for the duration of my call." Bilbo stated more than asked. He answered the call and listened.

"729462492746BB647294264927" Bilbo replied to whatever was said in a flurry of numbers almost too fast for the Company to catch.

"My apartment...Ten minutes...Of course...Fairly sure...Blue file between...Yes, that one...Delayed...Junction seven...sixty eight passengers...Snipers ready, in place at command. Yes...Yes...Behind...Yes." Bilbo shut the phone with a sharp click.

"Here is your first act of heroism against Smaug." Bilbo remarked bitterly hiding a yawn behind his hand. "Planned assassination of foreign dignitary, a successful assassination or even the foreign dignitary getting a whiff of the possibility would create enough of a diversion for Smaug's master plan to be put in effect. There are at least seven snipers and more back ups. I'm sure you can deduce the rest." Bilbo informed them yawning again.

"When did you last sleep?" Nori asked. Bilbo looked confused.

"I slept...four days ago? I think, four hours of sleep maybe. I'm not sure before that. I run on coffee. I can't sleep with him in the same room. I spend hours listening to his breaths and fantasising about stopping them. I don't like sharing a bed Nori, but you were nice, you let me sleep. I like your hair. You tried to save me, it was too late but you tried..." Bilbo grinned at Nori swaying on the spot.

"He's slaphappy." Dwalin grunted.

"I'm not surprised." Nori muttered. "He's spent years living in terror, close enough to hit one crime boss or another, always having to watch behind him and what he says and recently he's been given more work from Smaug." Here Nori's lips tightened. "And he's been getting us the files."

"Why does he want Smaug dead so badly?" Ori asked hesitantly.

"'cause he killed my mother, I think she was attempting to get you guys out of trouble at the time, a guy called Frerin or something. She managed to save most of you I think before she and Frerin were shot down, caught in the explosion. Smaug then killed my father and my cousins all before I reached the age of sixteen. I swore revenge, he burnt my home town into a crisp, the smoke was visible for days, the ashes like butterflies..." Bilbo giggled falling asleep where he stood.

Thorin eyed Nori. "Get him somewhere safe and keep an eye on him. The rest of you, we attack Smaug's base." Thorin ordered.

"But we don't know where Smaug's base is." Balin interjected. Thorin smiled wolfishly.

"Bilbo isn't the only one who can slip trackers or bugs onto people without their notice."

xxx

Three days later Smaug was killed, his network destroyed and his greatest assets, Azog and a special sniper team named the 'treasure' were locked up for life in a high security prison.

Curiously any mentions of a Bilbo Baggins was wiped off any and all computer systems in the world and Ori wore a smug grin all week.

The only loose thread was the Company had absolutely no idea who 'Sting' a secret operational force, 100% deadly efficient, was or where the group could be found...apart from one smugly smirking red haired theif.

Thorin groaned when he saw Nori's smug look. "Bilbo's the 'Sting', isn't he?" Thorin asked rhetorically. Nori tapped his nose with a wink.

Six weeks after Smaug's death one Bilbo Baggins was asked to join the 'Company', fully operational once more.

Tragically twenty years after Smaug's defeat the entire of the Company disappeared. Off all data bases, all Mi5 information banks and off every radar.

Two days after the Company disappeared a group of fourteen men brought a ship and spent the rest of their days sailing around the world.

And maybe clearing up the world's pirate problems...maybe.

Gandalf laughed.


	12. Chapter 12 Circus

25. Circus

Disclaimer.

Warnings: Age difference Slash...um... Bilbo/Oin

Bilbo Baggins of Bag End Circus grinned. It was show time!

He struggled not to smile at the gasps of surprise when he ate the flaming sword, they wouldn't be half as awed if they knew all the secrets and tricks and if the lights weren't dimmed just so.

Bilbo joined Nori on the high wires, taking the easier jobs; Nori was the best at the ropes. They played their own bodies like the trapeze they were hanging from, with expert care and confidence.

Bofur was the circus master, having the right charm and confidence to charm the crowds (along with a cheeky eyebrow waggle he always sent towards the ladies when there was a particularly blatant innuendo).

Packing up was part of the show as well, because all the things small enough to juggle (like plates, knives, forks etc) they chucked around using different bits of their bodies, laughing as they were tossed into their correct places and singing a cheery tune.

"Nori!" Someone shouted after the rest of the audience had disappeared. Nori's head shot up and he grinned in delight.

"Ori! Dori! Good to see you!" Nori greeted pulling them into a back breaking hug. Bilbo grinned, happy to see Nori happy even as he sped up the ladder to the high rope.

Bilbo breathed in and out slowly. He had to continually practice or else he wouldn't be able to do the high ropes, he wasn't a natural like Nori, not that he wasn't good, he was, just not as at ease in the air as Nori.

Bilbo's long toes gripped the rope and he walked across the rope a few times speeding up each time until he was nearly running.

Bilbo swung onto the hoop; he was far more at ease in the hoop or on a trapeze than he was on the high wire. Bilbo finished his gently exercise on the hoop slithering over and under before hanging from one leg on the hoop. To his surprise there were more figures on the ground with Nori than just Dori and Ori. Bilbo eyed them before making his decision. Bilbo dropped onto the net carefully angling his body so that he landed correctly without pulling anything. Bilbo bounced before stilling and he jumped of the net with well practised ease.

He silently walked up to Nori poking him in the side to announce his presence.

Nori jumped twirling round with impressive speed. Years of knowing Nori meant that Bilbo instinctively ducked out of Nori's automatic punch. Nori clutched his heart and sighed.

"You're creepy silent you know." Nori said Bilbo shrugged unrepentantly, he did tend to scare people by accidently popping up next to them, his mother and father also walked naturally quietly.

"Are you going to introduce me to your brothers? You hardly ever shut up about them, I feel like I know them already." Bilbo said in his calm, soft voice grinning at Nori's slight flush of embarrassment.

"I do not!" Nori said, an empty protest.

Bofur and Bifur both barked a laugh as they walked up. "Yes you do." Bofur said with a disarming, cheeky grin putting an arm around Bilbo's shoulder. Bilbo scowled. He was rather vertically challenged; something Bofur liked pointing out, the bastard.

"Anyway, this is Thorin, Dwalin, Gloin, Fili, Kili and Bombur, police. And this is my brothers, Ori and Dori. Ori's a nurse and Dori's police." Nori introduced them.

"Bilbo Baggins, at your service." Bilbo said with a bow.

"This isn't completely a social. We're here to ask questions." Thorin said gruffly eyeing Nori, Bilbo, Bifur and Bofur suspiciously.

"Ask away." Bofur said arms flung out theatrically.

Thorin separated them talking to Bilbo last.

"Mr. Baggins, where were you on the 21st August at roughly seven in the evening?" Thorin asked getting straight to business. Bilbo frowned.

"21st, that was three days ago...I was in my trailer, reading." Bilbo answered.

"Funny, because Bofur said he went to your trailer to ask if you wanted to join them for drinks only to find it unoccupied." Thorin remarked eyebrow raised.

"Funny." Bilbo repeated resisting the urge to clench his jaw.

"The item in question was stolen from the local GP. Someone going in for a check up reported it stolen while she was there being examined, so it can't have been the doctor as she placed her jewellery in the opposite direction to where the doctor was standing. And funnily enough some of your hairs and finger prints were found near the scene of the crime. Add that to the list of times you've been convicted of stealing before, although it has never been proven, well it's not looking very good for you is it? I repeat, where were you at seven in the evening on the 21st?" Thorin turned a stern unyielding look Bilbo's way. Bilbo sighed tiredly.

"You've already decided I did the crime. I have never stolen anything in my life, unless you count pilfering cookies from the cupboard at home when a child as stealing." Bilbo said gearing himself up for a nasty night spent in gaol.

He hated his mother sometimes, being one of the best thieves to ever exist was a point of pride for her and a sore point for Bilbo because he was automatically suspected even if he was in New York at the time, it had happened.

Bilbo sighed as he was escorted to the police car waiting outside, at least the police hadn't insisted on handcuffs this time. Bilbo froze suddenly as a thought hit him.

"Please can I make one phone call, before you drag me in?" Bilbo asked urgently, Thorin hesitated. "Look you can listen in, I'll even put it on speaker phone, please." Bilbo pleaded, finally Thorin nodded. Bilbo grinned in relief pulling out his mobile and ringing.

"Hi dad." Bilbo said when the phone picked up.

"Bilbo." A man's voice said warmly.

"You know I promised to come down for your birthday?" Bilbo said tiredly carrying on at the affirmative sound. "Well it seems I'm going to have to break that promise. I'm being dragged in by the police again."

"What are they accusing you of this time?" The man said sighing.

"Stealing." Bilbo replied shortly.

"Of course." The man replied dryly. Bilbo huffed a laugh.

"Anyway, I have your present. Will you tell Frodo to come and pick it up for you? It's in a box on my table in my trailer." Bilbo instructed, the man agreed to let Frodo know.

"Hopefully see you soon." Bilbo said before shutting off the call at the man's goodbye, he continued walking to the car no prompts needed.

Bofur, Bifur and Nori frowned as Bilbo was escorted towards their group and to the car. Nori scowled at the police along with Bofur.

Bifur began shouting at the police, incomprehensible to those who didn't speak fluent Russian. Bofur put a hand on his elbow succeeding in calming him down but he didn't stop glaring darkly at the police nor did he stop muttering in his native tongue, probably colourful insults going by Bofur's slightly amused expression.

Thorin spoke to Dwalin aside. "Check his trailer, there's a box on his table that sounds likely, he rang his 'father' and told him to send someone to pick it up." Thorin whispered unheard by everyone apart from Dwalin. Dwalin nodded.

"Well you'll be back with us in a few days and they'll find the real culprit." Bofur said consolingly sending dark looks towards the police. Bilbo sighed.

"There's some actual evidence this time, they're not like the police who thought I committed the crime in Kent when I was in New York at the time of the crime. I might actually take the rap for this crime, even if I didn't do it." Bilbo said gently tugging Bofur's elbow.

"We'll send you lots of booze." Bofur joked laughing when Bilbo just glared. Bilbo, being twenty-three, was never believed when he tried to buy alcohol, Bilbo was a tad absent minded in that he always without fail forgot his ID. Bofur tugged him into a brief but strong hug, Bifur's was just as brief but Bifur didn't use all his strength, Nori ruffled his hair affectionately.

Xxx

Thorin sighed. Bilbo was just calmly sitting in his cell reading a book.

Thorin picked up the phone quickly when it rang. "Dwalin." He greeted.

"Thorin, we checked the trailer, nothing. We unwrapped the box and well, it was just a photo album full of pics of what looks to be him as a kid and a man that looks like him. I don't think the lad was lying about missing his dad's birthday." Dwalin said gruffly. "Funny thing was, there were only ever pics of him and his dad, none of his mother or anyone else."

Thorin scrubbed his face with the hand not holding his phone. "Fine." Thorin said halting the call.

Xxx

"Where did you put the stolen items?" Thorin asked Bilbo calmly, he had just asked a series of quick fire questions so hopefully Bilbo would have lowered his guard and let something slip.

"I didn't steal anything." Bilbo insisted.

"Fine. Why were your hairs and finger prints at the scene of the crime, you didn't have a doctors appointment."

"I'm friends with one of the doctors; I brought him lunch so we could chat. If you ask the workers at the clinic then I'm sure you'll find that I was seen visiting every lunch that week." Bilbo explained tiredly.

"Who is this doctor?" Thorin asked.

"Dr. Oin Groinsson."

"Where were you at about seven on the night of the 21st?" Thorin had repeated this question a lot."

"I wasn't at the clinic." Bilbo said after a short pause.

xxx

"Where were you on the night of the 21st?"

"Not at the clinic." Bilbo repeated.

"I didn't ask where you weren't I asked where you were."

"I didn't steal anything."

"What about your mother, did you respect her? Were you trying to fill her shoes? Were you attempting to live up to her title?"

At this Bilbo snapped. He slapped a hand on the table and his mouth curled in slight bitterness. "Of course I don't respect her, she might have been a good thief but she was a poor mother and a worse wife. She stole my father's heart and life. I like to believe that by living a lawful life I have already filled her shoes and more." Bilbo said voice dripping icily.

"Where were you on the 21st?"

"It's a dirty little secret." Bilbo snapped before slamming his mouth shut.

xxx

It looked like an open and shut case, Bilbo Baggins was guilty. But something nagged at Thorin, despite the odds stacked against Bilbo there was something honest about him.

Thorin discretely listened in to the phone call.

"It looks like I might be spending a bit of time in gaol." Bilbo said despondently into the phone.

"I know I didn't do it...My mother's record works against me and they found my hair at the clinic...You know, sometimes I think I could hate my mother, she left my father waiting for her, always waiting, and her coveted title of best thief just makes trouble for me...I know...No you don't have to...But...Of course I'm not ashamed! I thought you wanted...Look, it doesn't matter if...I know it would get me out of the station, it's an iron clad alibi and the truth to boot...Okay...Look...I l-lo, I, I'll see you soon." Bilbo finished staring at his hands as he put the phone down.

Odd. What a curious conversation.

xxx

A man looking like he was in his late thirties early forties stood by Thorin's desk. Dr. Groinsson, Thorin had spoken to him when confirming Bilbo had actually shared lunches with the man.

He perked up slightly when he caught sight of Thorin.

"I know where Bilbo Baggins was at seven on the night of the 21st." Was not something Thorin had expected the man to say.

"Where was he?" Thorin asked, finally they were getting somewhere.

"He was with me." Oin said.

"It's rather fishy you're only coming in and saying that now, why didn't you speak earlier? And did anyone else see you two together to confirm your alibi?" Thorin asked suspiciously. Oin sighed.

"Look, I didn't come in earlier because..." He paused. "Anyway, we started a relationship two years ago and we went to a restaurant, I think it was called Rivendell, to celebrate our anniversary of sorts." Oin said in a rush. Thorin could feel his eyebrows climb higher and higher.

"You and Bilbo Baggins are dating?" Thorin asked flatly. Oin laughed shakily.

"Yes. A committed one. And I know there's an age difference, twenty years."

"Why didn't you come forward earlier?" Thorin asked.

"Isn't it obvious?"

"Why didn't Bilbo say anything?"

"I-He didn't...I didn't want people knowing initially because, well, anyway I thought he would get tired of me, he was only twenty-one. I didn't expect him to like me as much as I like him. I think he thinks I think of him as a dirty secret." Oin said looking slightly pained.

Thorin's mind flashed back to Bilbo's slightly bitter comment about it being a 'dirty little secret'.

"What was the restaurant? Do you have a phone number?" Thorin asked, if the restaurant confirmed Bilbo and Oin's alibi then Bilbo would go free.

Xxx

"I feel like a dick." Thorin muttered to Dwalin as they watched Bilbo and Oin leave the station, Bilbo looking much happier.

Dwalin grunted. "You are one." He said patting Thorin on the shoulder ignoring Thorin's dark scowl.

"No, I mean, we made the lad miss his dad's birthday, locked him up and outted his secret relationship." Thorin said.

Dwalin shrugged. "Does he look unhappy to you?" He asked and Thorin eyed Bilbo's happy face, eyes sparkling mouth curled up in a smile. Involuntarily Thorin's mouth also curled up at the corners. Maybe it wasn't so bad.


	13. Chapter 13 1950s

**3- 1950s**

**Disclaimer.**

**Warnings: incorrect judicial measures to make plot of story...um...**

**...it's set in the 1950's...**

**Based on this prompt:**

**Company graduation, Bilbo**

**Modern!AU**  
**-When Bilbo first started his years at a university he tried not to think too much of the day he'd finally graduate only to have no one in the stands cheering for him.**  
**Now he's finally graduating and couldn't be happier, because 13 of his closest friends are nearly breaking eardrums with their cheers for him.**

* * *

Bilbo looked around the university eyes gleaming in curiosity and triumph. He had made it! Despite all the people who had doubted him, told him to be more realistic Bilbo had made it.

He had managed to come from a small farming town and got a scholarship for one of the top universities in Middle Earth. Bilbo had worked hard to get the best results he could devouring any and every book that crossed his path. But his victory had been a hollow one.

He had always imagined graduating university with his parents in the crowd waiting for him, pride in their eyes, clapping as he received his diploma. They had both stood behind him when he dreamed of something more than the small farming town he had grown up in; they had both supported him and fuelled his targets. But it was not to be.

Mere months before Bilbo had applied for university his parents had been involved in an automobile accident; Bilbo had been called in to identify the mangled bodies of his mother and father. The sight of their gruesome remains haunted him still.

So Bilbo's victory had been hollow, he had barely remembered to send an application for Erebor university let alone feel triumph when he got accepted.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo sighed head sinking down as he read through his heavy law tome. He was enjoying the lectures, law was fascinating sometimes which made up for the occasional deathly dull bits but despite his pleasure in the academic side of things he was not happy. Bilbo had never felt so alone before.

He knew no one. The majority of people that attended Erebor university were rich kids with massive trust funds (able to buy the entire of the Shire and still have enough for a villa in Spain) and most had grown up together leaving Bilbo on the fringes a little too shy to just strike up a conversation. Also a few (a lot of them actually) of the students disdained him for his 'humble' origins. Something Bilbo found ridiculous, his grades were a darn sight better than most of the rich twerps. It was only Bilbo's utter determination and iron will that meant he hadn't dropped out already.

That and professor Gandalf.

Professor Gandalf was very encouraging, his advice was always a little odd and on the gloomy side but it was nearly always right and worth far more than empty platitudes. Professor Gandalf always had some wise sounding, horribly confusing but ultimately simple advice on hand. Bilbo suspected he had a list of them somewhere and added to it when he was bored. As a professor of law Gandalf was very tricky with words, very cleverly placing them and choosing them with the utmost care.

It was through Gandalf that Bilbo met Thorin Durin and his friends, The Company.

Thorin Durin was the son of the mayor of Erebor and from what Bilbo had seen acted like an entitled brat.

Professor Gandalf was a lawyer in his free time and that was what Thorin had come in for, he was asking about a case.

A couple of months ago Thorin's grandfather, Thror, had been arrested for causing a public disturbance along with Azog. Thror and Azog had had a devastating rivalry having caused several riots from their fights before and on one memorable occasion both had had each other at gunpoint.

The police man on duty at that time, Drakos Smaug, had been warned about their rivalry and informed to keep them separated. In the morning Thror had been found dead, strangled and beaten bloody in his cell. Now Smaug swore he had kept Azog and Thror in separate cells, a claim supported by the two other on duty police men, Saruman and Sauron.

Thorin knew they were lying, knew that from laziness and negligence (and no small dose of spite, he didn't like Thror after all) Smaug had caused the death of his grandfather and had managed to convince Sauron and Saruman to provide proof that Smaug hadn't done anything wrong, that he hadn't placed two well known murderous enemies in the same cell.

Thorin knew all of this, Smaug had practically admitted it to him smugly, he just didn't have one jot of evidence to support his claim.

So Thorin sought out Gandalf in hopes a good lawyer could do something in the up and coming court case.

Gandalf had agreed on one condition: Bilbo be his assistant. Gandalf claimed it would be good to get some practical experience under his belt, Bilbo thought Gandalf was barmy that he wanted a trainee student on a real and influential court case a sentiment shared it seemed by Thorin whose upper lip curled when he caught sight of Bilbo.

Gandalf just chuckled.

And so they had poured through the police reports, the bits of information that said who was in what cell etc. Nothing. There was absolutely nothing they could see that would support Thorin's claim.

Bilbo spent hours with Thorin and his friends trying to find anything but to no avail, there was nothing obvious that could be used to prove Smaug's guilt at conspiring to murder Thror.

Bilbo did manage to befriend a few of the people in Thorin's group though. Bofur was always ready for a chat and good at raising people's spirits with his inappropriate jokes that at first had made Bilbo flush bright red until he had gotten used to it. Balin was calmly kind, ready with a sound piece of advice. Fili and Kili were trouble makers and included Bilbo as much as they did the rest of the group. And Ori was just as fascinated by law as Bilbo was; their discussions in the few breaks they took were refreshing to them both.

Only Thorin seemed to scorn Bilbo's presence. Bilbo was both irritated by his rudeness towards him and reluctantly agreeing. Bilbo was hardly useful so far nor had he any real reason to be there apart from Gandalf's meddling. But he was _trying_ to help.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo nervously fiddled with his tie and the lapels of his suit just outside of the court room. Thorin glared at his nervous fiddling and Bilbo stopped, sitting on his hands so he would he less tempted to fidget. Bilbo breathed in and out slowly, it was fine, he wasn't going to be speaking, he was just going to sit there and listen, Gandalf and Thorin would do all the work.

Well that had been the plan before Gandalf decided to skip out citing family emergency and handing all the relevant case work to Bilbo who just sat there stunned at the turn of the events.

Thorin glared as Gandalf strode out before turning his fearsome scowl towards Bilbo who just sat their eyes wide mouth slightly agape. WHAT? How was he supposed to...what?

Bilbo avoided Thorin gaze breathing in and out slowly closing his eyes to calm himself down. When he felt a slight measure of calm Bilbo opened his eyes and focused on the wall opposite, the board pinned with various advertisements and odd facts.

One large poster caught his eyes and he read it absently one word leaping out at him as him brain kicked into gear...Discolouration...

* * *

xxx

Thorin scowled angrily as Gandalf walked away. He had hired a good lawyer not a university student! He glared at Bilbo's fidgeting form in annoyance. Bilbo probably would just get flustered in front of a jury and judge like he did when speaking to people.

Thorin felt the disappointment hit him. With Gandalf they had had a chance to win the case, a small chance but still a chance. Thorin eyed Bilbo's small form; they now had absolutely no chance.

Suddenly for no apparent reason Bilbo jumped up. Thorin jerked in surprise only just managing not to fall off his chair. He glanced askance at Bilbo who was beaming at a poster. Thorin eyed Bilbo warily, had the pressure gotten to him?

Bilbo turned to face Thorin triumph lighting his eyes. Just as Bilbo opened his mouth to explain his odd actions they were called into the court room. Thorin quelled his frustration with another searing glare sent Bilbo's way. Bilbo didn't notice.

* * *

xxx

Thorin stared at Bilbo as they left the court room the victory not yet quite sinking in.

Bilbo had found a way of proving the reports were collaborated by a joint effort of Smaug, Sauron and Saruman just mere seconds before they had entered the court room from a poster of all things! Apparently in the reports supposedly written by three different people all had the same spelling error for the word used on each of the reports.

Bilbo proved that the three separate reports were written by one person, the only person who had lived in America for some time and so adopted some of their spellings. The word **discoloration **was repeated in each report. Sauron and Smaug who were both British and who had never left the country would have spelt it **discolo****u****ration **something Bilbo proved when he asked them all to write out the word in front of the court. Saruman had spent years in America as he grew up and so spelt it discoloration, as it was written in _all_ of the reports.

Saruman had written the three reports so they would all look the same instead of them each writing their own as should have happened.

Thorin had watched just as gobsmacked as Smaug as Bilbo proceeded to competently and confidently prove Thorin's point. There was no trace of the young man who blushed when spoken to or who quailed under dark glares as Bilbo faced down Smaug. Bilbo had managed to show the grave Smaug had dug himself and point out the shovel used, he also hinted at some other misdeeds that had occurred in the offices Smaug had worked in before, he didn't have proof they were Smaug's doing but...

Bilbo blushed when he realised Thorin was staring at him.

"I'm sorry I doubted you." Thorin finally managed to say eyes still wide with the shock that Bilbo had managed to win the case based on such a tiny easily missed clue as a spelling difference. Bilbo shrugged.

"It was only by chance I looked at the poster which mentioned bruise discolouration outside the courtroom." Bilbo said dismissively. Thorin shook his head in disagreement; no one else had seen it but he kept quiet. The Company would love this!

* * *

xxx

Bilbo smiled as he slipped into the robe worn for graduation.

He would never have expected to have come so far when he first attended university. When he had first arrived he had expected to graduate with a polite applause no one who actually knew him in the crowd but his expectations were thoroughly shot down as he entered the stage to see all thirteen of his best friends cheering and clapping far too loudly to be appropriate, ignoring the admonishing looks sent their way for their language and vulgarity. Bilbo's grin split his face he was smiling so wide.

He was deafened by the racket his friends were causing, ecstatic with his high grades and he wouldn't be caught anywhere else.

It wasn't his good grades or his victory in the court room against Smaug that sent triumph and happiness shooting through him, it was his friends the rowdy raucous bunch they were that put the wide smile on his face.

He was far from the lonely grieving boy he had been when he first entered university haunted by his parents mangled bodies.

He had come into his own, gotten more confident in himself all the while surrounded by his dearest friends. Life was good.


	14. Chapter 14 Superhero

**4. Superhero**

** Slight hints of Bilbo/Thorin.**

**Based on the batman movie where Robin and his family work in a circus until they die, killed by...Doctor Oc? I can't quite remember...**

**Disclaimer.**

**Warnings: murder-not gory...um...**

* * *

Bilbo felt free. He was doing what he loved surrounded by his family dancing in the air. No ropes, safety nets or mats to soften a fall, there never were. As a family they plied their trade and as a family they worked seamlessly. There were multiple aerial acts at one time, a couple of them in the hanging hoops, a couple more on the trapeze and a couple on the silks.

The crowd gasped all the more because there was no safety line; if you fell, you fell hard. Sometimes you didn't get back up.

They travelled never staying in one place for long and Bilbo was happy, he loved being surrounded by his family doing the things he wanted to do.

When they came to Erebor Bilbo came down with a nasty cold and so was out of the act, if you felt even a little off you did not perform on the dangerous acts such as the aerial ones, it had been one of the first rules Bilbo had learnt.

So Bilbo watched lost in the crowd in one of the best seats (his mothers fault, he wouldn't have minded sitting in the cheaper seats). Bilbo barely noticed the man next to him dressed in an expensive suit with rather prominent muscles, eyes intent on his mother a smile curling his lips as he watched his father and mother pull a double act on the trapeze. They worked beautifully when together, nothing compared.

So Bilbo was watching in the crowd as all the ropes snapped, the poles holding up the trapeze, the silks and the hoops came crashing down along with the aerial artists mid act.

They lay still on the ground unmoving for a long second before Bilbo moved.

"Mum! Dad!" Bilbo shouted desperately vaulting onto the rail that was there to keep the audience away from the circus acts and running along it to avoid the crowd and get to his family as quickly as possible.

Bilbo sank to his knees when he reached the impossibly still forms, chests no longer rising and falling. Finding no pulse on his mother and father he quickly reached for the others, his aunts and uncles and cousins. He couldn't find a single flicker on life.

Bilbo sat there, in amongst the newly dead (they were still warm for God's sake!) uncaring as tears traced down his face and not a word was uttered from him. He sat there silent, staring into his mother's lifeless gaze and looking blankly at the exhilarated smile that would be forever etched on her dead face.

He didn't recall the paramedics rushing in nor did he remember the screams from the audience that started when they first fell, he didn't notice the police scanning the area for whoever had caused the 'accident'. He didn't feel the strong man from earlier who had been sitting next to him pick him up as easily as if Bilbo had been a child's doll nor did he remember sinking into the crushing darkness after the man had placed him in a bed.

* * *

xxx

Earlier that evening:

Thorin scowled, he didn't want to go to a circus but alas his sister had forced him to go citing his lack of social life as 'unhealthy'.

Thorin had to admit the aerial acts were something; the artists were flying through the air with smiles on their faces, enjoying it!

Thorin dismissed the young boy seated next to him, feeling slight irritation when the boy muttered under his breath listing the different manoeuvres and the mistakes made. Honestly, it didn't look like mistakes. Thorin nearly scowled at the slight lad, annoyed at someone critiquing the superb acts.

And then the supports fell, obviously sabotaged a distant voice in Thorin's brain told him. And he felt like an utter cad for being irritated by the lads commentary when he rose with a cry of anguish shouting for his mother and father, two of the artists.

Ah, so he wasn't critiquing the work but analysing for future reference and so they could improve it. Thorin's brain supplied. Thorin remained motionless for a split second too long as the lad next to him vaulted (rather spectacularly) onto the railing running along the narrow bar as though it was a wide pavement without even a wobble vaulting from one railing to another to avoid the panicked crowd and so he could swiftly reach his parents.

"'It'll be fun' she said. 'It'll be entertaining' she said." Thorin groused to himself as he made his way over pushing through the crowd going at a far slower rate than the boy had. Thorin got to him as the boy was checking the pulse on all of them. Thorin felt sympathy welling in his gut when he heard the boy calling them auntie... or uncle... or cousin... And then the boy sat down blankly next to the two marvellous trapeze artists.

His mother and father Thorin surmised.

The paramedics rushed in and Thorin was glad someone had had the foresight to call them. He should have called them, normally he was very good in dangerous situations but something about the nature of this, of seeing the grief in the lads face stumped him. It reminded him of his own parent's deaths and he felt helpless. Thorin despised feeling helpless.

So he did what he could.

He picked the silent lost in his own grief lad up and offered to house him until he was better. It would be a strain trying to keep his secret identity safe with a person not in the know living with him but the manor was large, he was sure it would work and Balin his butler and old friend would help.

The lad didn't stir as he was put into a car nor when Thorin picked him up again as he wasn't responding to his orders to stand up and get out the car. Thankfully though when the boy was placed into a bed, hurriedly made up by Balin, his eyelids fluttered and he fell asleep hiding his blank gaze.

The boy, Bilbo, he was informed, didn't speak for days, he barely acknowledged them, he just drifted around like a ghost. Even his footsteps were silent!

Nothing Balin or Thorin did seemed to get through the shell Bilbo had put up, a shell that shuttered his eyes and sliced his vocal cords.

Then Bilbo found the massive library. And something seemed to change; a light reappeared in his eyes and he seemed more aware. Bilbo now thanked them for things and (on a good day) could be drawn into a small conversation.

It was Thorin who found the one subject that lit up Bilbo's eyes and had him talking for days. His family. He told them snippets of a life growing up in a circus, on the road, always surrounded by family, of the camaraderie they shared and the care and devotion his parents had for one another.

They learnt Bilbo was 16 nearly 17, that his education was spotty in some places and way beyond the level a normal 16 year olds was in others. Bilbo, it seemed, adored History and Geography, pulling out maps to eye the lay of the land before describing the various boundaries and battles that led to the borders today. He also loved reading, he had to be torn away from the library a few times to be reminded to eat and drink.

And Thorin decided to let Bilbo stay, it was nice having company other than Balin around and Balin liked having someone else to fuss over. And Bilbo didn't have anywhere else to go.

Thorin enrolled Bilbo into college so Bilbo had something to do with his time and so he could get some real qualifications.

Some days Bilbo was a 17 year old, full of life and chatter, other days he was absolutely silent, a ghost haunting the library. Thorin had suggested a psychologist but Balin had just said 'these things take time', urging him not to force Bilbo into anything.

Then one day, after college, Bilbo came home, determination licking his heels as he made his way to his room. New light was in his eyes; as if he had he had found a purpose, a crusade to fight for.

Bilbo didn't retreat silently into the library anymore, didn't retreat into his shell. He occasionally stayed out late not coming back until the early hours of the morning, he kept to his room more often but whenever Thorin or Balin saw him he was cheerful and bright and as ready to chat as ever despite the shadows under his eyes that Thorin shared from lack of proper sleep.

At his actions Balin just shook his head muttering 'teenagers'. Thorin would have liked to scold Bilbo for his irregular comings and goings but he had no leg to stand on. Thorin had to pretend to be the rich arsehole, going to parties, getting 'drunk' just to keep his cover as Thorin Durin and to be as opposite from the known vigilante 'Oakenshield' as possible.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo had gone to college one day and caught his friend, Nori, nicking some cash from one of the teachers. Bilbo had waited until they were somewhere unobtrusive before asking Nori why he had done so.

Nori had stolen so his little brother Ori could eat and get the books he wanted and so his elder brother Dori needn't work himself to death. Bilbo had been appalled, he had never been rich or wealthy but the circus had been successful and he lacked for nothing with Thorin who was wealthy in the extreme. Bilbo had done some research and found that Erebor had a huge number of people struggling for money, scraping enough to eat etc.

And Bilbo had noticed the extreme crime in Erebor, the rich crime lords ruled the city and that's why people were so poor, the crime lords charged them for protection, like an extra tax. It was sickening.

Half the officials seemed to be taking bribes or corrupt.

Oakenshield, the known vigilante, was putting a stop to a few of the most influential crime leaders but there was nothing being done for the people suffering under the crime lords.

And then...then Bilbo had an idea.

So he joined the local gymnastics and got lessons with a private teacher so some of his circus skills wouldn't get rusty. He spoke to a toy maker, Bofur, who had been under a crime lord until recently and when he could he helped those in need. And Bilbo, he got out the costume that had been made for him for aerial acrobatics that he had never worn before, it had been a new design and none of the public had ever seen it. It had been at the bottom of his suitcase since he came to Thorin's manor.

No one except Bilbo knew the design or of it, the other people who had known were dead. It was partly a way of honouring the dead and partly because Bilbo's mother would have had a hoot at Bilbo's self proclaimed mission.

And soon, there were two recognisable vigilantes instead of one.

* * *

xxx

Three years later:

Bilbo snorted at the newspaper nearly choking on his cereal. Thorin raised an eyebrow.

"What, pray tell, is so amusing?" Thorin asked a little stiffly, there was a large piece in the newspaper about Oakenshield and he hoped Bilbo wasn't another to just disparage him and his work.

"It's the name they've given that other vigilante, the one who wears green. They've taken to calling him Robin." Bilbo said with another snort. Thorin relaxed slightly. He and Robin had met a few times, both trying to help people, Robin was infuriating with his teasing comments but Thorin acknowledged he was liked by the poor and did help people. What he didn't like was Robin was stealing, even if it was to help the poor, he was trying to stop crime not let a vigilante get away with it.

Bilbo snorted again, yes he supposed he did act a little like Robin Hood, stealing from the rich to give to the poor but did they have to name him 'Robin'? It was just so...so...Bilbo sighed, he supposed despite their slightly ungainly look Robins were very graceful and swift in flight, so the name wasn't too far off.

The article went on to disparage Robin. Robin often managed to steal an expensive trinket, like a necklace or something like that but he'd replace it with an exquisite plastic version, so the people wouldn't know it was missing until they realised it was plastic and not the expensive precious gems. Bilbo had left monopoly money in place of real money a few times, it made him laugh.

Bofur, the toy maker, was amazing at his job. Bilbo would take pictures of the item in question, estimate the weight and size and tell Bofur who would make a plastic or glass or even just a much cheaper metal version; Bilbo always paid him well for it. Bofur's creations were spectacularly similar to the original and nearly fooled even him.

Bilbo would then sell the real jewels to a sympathetic jeweller, Gandalf, who paid a fair price before dismantling the item. Gandalf had been discretely helping those in need before and he liked what Bilbo was doing.

"Doesn't seem a very good Samaritan move, stealing. Even if the proceeds go to the poor." Bilbo commented disparagingly. He tended to lightly disdain 'Robin' when talking to others so they didn't ever think it was him behind the mask.

Thorin felt a brief urge to defend 'Robin', he was doing good after all, but he squashed it down, there was no point and Bilbo was allowed his own opinions. Thorin admitted the name the public chose did fit 'Robin', he stole from the rich to give to the poor and he moved much like the bird, in swift flight, dancing through the air and always in a happy, curious manner.

"Aren't you supposed to be leaving for work now?" Thorin asked eyeing his watch. Bilbo glanced at the time before blanching and jumping up shoving a slice of toast in his mouth and swiftly, near flying out the room.

It wouldn't do to be late and Bilbo did so hate being rude.

* * *

xxx

Three nights later:

Bilbo grinned as he jumped from building to building, sometimes using ropes and grappling hooks and others just his natural body movements. He knew Erebor like the back of his hand and could get anywhere from just running across roofs in a far faster time than he would on the ground. It was freeing. If Bilbo had to put a name to what he did it would be street running, the sport where you use anything and everything in your surroundings to move speedily, jumping off buildings scaling drain pipes etc.

He had the jewellery in his pocket and no one was chasing him, it had been a lucrative night.

Bilbo frowned, pulling the fitted green mask more securely over his features, as he noticed what appeared to be a scuffle not far away.

Silently Bilbo crept nearer. His eyebrows shot up to his hair line as he took in the grappling forms of Oakenshield and another man. From Oakenshield's stiff movements and favouring of his left side he had been hit with something and probably drugged or concussed.

Bilbo crept up behind the person grappling with Oakenshield and unnoticed swiftly incapacitated them before heading over to Oakenshield.

"Fancy seeing you here Oak. And me being the daring rescuer and all. Do I get a kiss for saving this damsel in distress?" Bilbo mocked examining Oakenshield's pupils and feeling for his pulse.

"N-not a dam-damsel. D-don't need y-your help." Oakenshield rasped breathing heavily eyes falling shut for a few seconds before he forced them open again. Bilbo rolled his eyes pushing down the niggling worry and the faint feeling that he recognised who Oakenshield was.

"I'm sure if I let you stand up by yourself you'd majestically topple over. Save your posturing for when you can actually stand up unaided. Until then you have my assistance." Bilbo said dryly. Oakenshield snorted.

"C-can st-stand up myself." Oakenshield insisted even as most of his body weight was supported by Bilbo.

"Sure you can." Bilbo muttered sarcastically. They weren't far from Gandalf's and he was pretty good at stitching people back together.

Somehow Bilbo managed to drag Oakenshield's hulking form to Gandalf's despite the fact Bilbo was slight of frame, lithely muscled. Oakenshield was built like a rock, not an easy thing to move at all.

* * *

xxx

Thorin came to a few hours later on a soft bed his head throbbing along with his side. Thorin poked the bandage carefully trying to ascertain the damage done.

A sudden thought struck and Thorin immediately felt his face for his mask breathing out in relief as he found it still on and unmoved. His identity was still secret.

Just then Robin entered the room bearing a tray with some tea and sandwiches on. Thorin watched Robin curiously, he didn't have to help him yet Robin had and taken him somewhere to be healed and it wasn't a hospital so his cover wasn't blown.

"Are you feeling alright? We're not quite sure what drug was in your system but Gandalf thinks it wasn't anything really bad or anything that will cause problems later. He stitched up your side for you." Robin said in a melodious voice Thorin could have sworn was strangely familiar, and not just because he and Robin had bantered with one another whenever they met.

Thorin eyed the mask on Robin's face speculatively. If Robin just moved a little closer...

Just as Robin was handing Thorin some tea Thorin struck swiftly yanking the mask off Robin's face. Honey coloured curls and eyes met Thorin's thunderstruck eyes as he recognised Robin.

Bilbo, Bilbo the boy he had taken in, was Robin.

Thorin was so shocked by this revelation he missed Bilbo grabbing his mask.

"There now we're both defrocked..." Bilbo trailed off as he recognised Thorin. As one they spoke.

"Bugger."

* * *

(I also don't own the quote from BBC Sherlock's ASiB, Irene Adler...)


	15. Chapter 15 FairytaleDisney Movie

**8. Disney Movie/Fairytale **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hobbit or the Little Mermaid or 1001 nights. First chapter, may be continued as an actual story later one day.**

* * *

Bilbo Baggins stared at his first and second cousin once removed either way in horror. It couldn't be happening, it _couldn't_. Even the king couldn't do _this_.

Frodo, who since his parents had died had lived with Bilbo (whose parents had also died), they were similar in age, Bilbo being about three years older and as thick as thieves.

They had similar interests, reading about the world outside their comfortable Shire, looking longingly at maps of far distant lands, both being rather clever academically and with a sharp wit.

"No!" Bilbo found himself yelling pushing himself in front of his wide eyed, horror struck cousin (more like brother) without a second thought. Bilbo stared up at the intimidating form of the dwarf on front of him; the king could not have his Frodo.

The bald headed dwarf covered in tattoos and with two axes both bigger than Bilbo himself strapped to his back raised a dismissive eyebrow. Bilbo stood firm quelling his fear, Frodo was more important. The dwarf made to push Bilbo to the side and Bilbo lashed out with the only thing he had to hand.

His aim struck true and the dwarf reeled back with a yell. The bald headed dwarf started speaking in a gruff guttural language, probably swearing and cursing Bilbo's parentage. Bilbo crossed his arms defiantly glaring at the imposing dwarf.

After a few seconds the dwarf quietened still occasionally rubbing his head aggrieved. He eyed the frying pan in Bilbo's hands with caution.

Bilbo felt movement to his side and stared as Lobelia Bracegirdle, the girl with an impressive sharp tongue and an insult always at the ready, stood next to Bilbo, side by side as though facing a battle hefting her customary umbrella menacingly. Bilbo sent a sharp toothed grin to the dwarf thanking Lobelia for her support with a quick smile.

"Mahal, a frying pan. Why?" The dwarf muttered to himself eyeing the two hobbits with new wariness.

"Look it's not my choice; I'm just following my Kings orders." The dwarf sighed in irritation.

"Well you can tell that king of yours that he can go suck..." Bilbo interjected before Lobelia properly offended the dwarf.

"The king just needs a virgin, someone unmarried; he didn't specify Frodo, did he?" Bilbo clarified softly ignoring Lobelia's sharp look. At the dwarf's nod Bilbo continued holding his frying pan lower as a sign of truce. "Then I'll go instead." Bilbo said adamantly ignoring Lobelia's snort and Frodo's objection.

The dwarf eyed Bilbo with new appreciation mixed with a touch of pity and no small amount of shame. "Aye. As you wish." The dwarf said. "We leave on the morrow." The dwarf said walking back to the ale house he was staying at.

Lobelia huffed. "You're doomed. I'm not travelling all that way to witness your funeral so I'll say my goodbyes here. I don't like you; you don't like me. Oh, and you nobleness sickens me...Yep, that's it." Lobelia said turning on her heal and walking away. Bilbo snorted resisting the urge to stick out his tongue to Lobelia's retreating back.

Bilbo turned to a wretched looking Frodo and gently guided him back into their hobbit hole; a cup of tea would do wonders.

Lobelia was canny; her plan to escape the King was to marry quickly. It was a good idea to be honest and far less likely to end in her death.

* * *

xxx

Everyone knew the Kings story and it was not a particularly nice one. King Thorin had once been a just and fair king, ruling with his wife by his side and his brother and sister beside him. Unfortunately Thror, Thorin's grandfather, had been cursed for his greedy ways by Smaug, one of the last firedrakes. Thror had been lost in his own greed, never leaving the treasury until he died, leaving the throne to his son, Thrain.

Thrain was a good king until he was assassinated by orders of a neighbouring rival. Thorin, barely an adult, had squashed the rebellion and prevented war. He was a good king, a great one even and he had his two sister sons as his heirs.

Then not three decades into his reign his brother was murdered by his wife in their marriage bed. Frerin had loved his wife dearly, but she did not love him. Soon after Thorin's own wife, a marriage made to solidify ties between Erebor and the Iron Hills, had been caught having an affair.

Thorin had seen both women executed for their crimes.

The dragons curse, long dormant, had awakened at the new chink in Thorin's armour. Thorin, grieving for his brother and smarting from the embarrassment his wife had caused him was blindingly enraged towards his dead wife and sister in law. The dragons curse had preyed on this weakness, whispering dark enchanting, twisting words, fanning the flames of Thorin's anger.

And Thorin had succumbed.

He was still an ultimately fair ruler but no longer was he the beloved prince of Erebor, nor their noble king. And Thorin had taken to marrying a person one night and beheading them at dawn so they had no choice or time to betray him.

Soon enough people had smuggled their unwed daughters and sons out of Erebor and so the King had tasked his friend and bodyguard, Dwalin son of Fundin with finding and bringing to Erebor virgins for him to wed.

Unwillingly Dwalin had agreed.

* * *

xxx

"You cannot go!" Frodo beseeched.

"I would rather go than see you be taken." Bilbo replied sipping at his rapidly cooling tea.

"So would I! I would rather be taken than you unnecessarily taking my place!" Frodo said glaring at his infuriating cousin.

"I am sorry, Frodo. Please, let me be selfish just this last time." Bilbo asked pleadingly. Frodo eyed his brother in all but blood noting the stubborn expression that Bilbo wore all too well. It was an expression that Frodo knew meant Bilbo would not change his mind, that he would bend even the water to his indomitable will.

It was the same expression he wore when facing down the elders in the Shire after Frodo's parents had died, telling them that yes, Frodo was going to live with him in Bag End despite the fact neither was of age yet and there was no parental influence. It had taken days but Bilbo had not budged an inch and he had gotten his way through sheer stubbornness and a few wily tricks.

Frodo had been utterly relieved; he had wanted to live with Bilbo despite him being only 23 and Bilbo being 26. Bilbo hadn't been surprised at all; in fact his expression had only exclaimed disbelief that it took the elders so long to agree on it.

Bilbo and Frodo had been fine in their large hobbit hole by themselves and it didn't take long for people to notice it.

Bilbo and Frodo did go waking around the Shire often like many tween hobbits did.

They behaved and looked like brothers, best friends.

While Bilbo had honey coloured hair and honey coloured eyes Frodo had vivid blue eyes and dark hair but the rest of their feature were similar, the same bone structure, both were rather slight for hobbits, not having quite enough stomach to be truly handsome by hobbit standards, both about the same height and both were fair of face.

Frodo examined Bilbo before sighing in defeat. "Fine. We'll go. But we must think of a plan to prevent the inevitable execution or make you unavailable to wed." Frodo said mind wandering over the possibilities.

Bilbo stared. "What do you mean we?"

"I'm not letting you go to Erebor by yourself, don't be stupid. You'll probably end up getting eaten by trolls or attacked by goblins if I'm not around to stop you." Frodo said flippantly. "Now what shall we pack? And what are we going to do to stop you getting beheaded?" Frodo mused a frown of worry for Bilbo wrinkling his brow.

Bilbo snorted. "I'm the Shire's story teller, not a tactician." Bilbo said before freezing in place.

"What? What is it?" Frodo demanded. Bilbo smiled at Frodo, his clever eyes gleaming.

"I have an idea that just might work..."

* * *

xxx

Dwalin was surprised when morning came to find two hobbits packed and ready tucking into breakfast at the Green Dragon (the inn he was staying at).

Not only was the hobbit who had hit him with a frying pan there, his head was actually bruised the hobbit was stronger than he looked, but the very lad he had been protecting was there too.

The two hobbits noticed him and bade him to sit down both wearing smug looks although it was tinged with trepidation. The one with honey coloured hair (who wielded a mean frying pan) stood up and bowed as Dwalin drew near.

"Bilbo Baggins at your service." Bilbo greeted the dwarf politely before frowning at the bruise on Dwalin's head. "I do apologise for hitting you yesterday, I am rather protective of my brother I'm afraid." Bilbo apologised politely looking sincere.

"Think nothing of it lad. I would do the same for my brother." Not that Balin needed any protection; the dwarf was a canny old bastard.

The darker haired lad bowed then. "Frodo Baggins at your service." He said politely. Dwalin remembering his manners bowed back at both of them.

"Dwalin son of Fundin at your service." Dwalin said as he sat down and started eating.

"Why are there two of you?" Dwalin asked bluntly. Bilbo shrugged.

"I can't let him go off by himself! He might be my older cousin but he can't order me to stay at home while he goes off risking his neck!" Frodo exclaimed jabbing Bilbo in the side with his elbow. Dwalin frowned.

"I thought you said you were brothers?" He queried.

"We're brothers but not by blood. He's my second and first cousin once removed either way." Bilbo explained.

* * *

xxx

The two hobbits had surprised Dwalin. Hobbits as a general rule did not like leaving their comfortable homes and prosperous lands and despite Bilbo and Frodo both seeming sad at leaving their homes they were willing to do so. Dwalin had been ordered to bring back a hobbit to wed Thorin as there were no more unwedded dwarves in Erebor (most had been smuggled out, Dwalin and many other guards had turned a blind eye to those escaping).

Bilbo Baggins had volunteered to protect his brother and to prevent another of the Shire going in his place. Dwalin could respect that. And it seemed Bilbo would not be going to Erebor alone as his brother, Frodo, wasn't going to leave Bilbo alone despite the certain death Bilbo faced and Frodo probably would right after Bilbo's execution.

And the young lass that had stood with Bilbo the other day had guts too. She was a pretty little thing with sharp eyes and an even sharper tongue.

It seemed these hobbits had hidden depths to them.

Dwalin was even more shocked as when on their journey, they accidently got stuffed into sacks by three trolls, Bilbo and Frodo proceeded to talk the trolls out of eating them and distracted them until sunrise when the sunlight turned the trolls to stone.

Dwalin could have applauded their ingenuity and cunning resourcefulness if it hadn't been their fault in the first place that they were captured. Still, it rose his esteem of them higher. Dwalin couldn't help but wish (once again) that the old Thorin would come back to them, free himself from the shackles of the dragons curse. It would be a sad day when the innocent, cheerful beings he was travelling with were put to death.

Dwalin couldn't suppress the tiny irrational hope that this time, this time Thorin would snap out of it. He was not sure the hope was worth the inevitable disappointment.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo tugged at his best Shire clothes nervously. He was about to be wedded to the same king who had ordered every one of his wives and husbands killed the morning after.

Bilbo prayed that his idea worked.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo waited in his living room of his new chambers for his new husband.

He moved a plate of scones and cookies he had baked earlier that day onto the table by the fire and a large comfortable sofa. He had ale ready at the side and soothing cup of wine and spices warming by the fire.

Bilbo was dressed in his nightwear with a soft robe thrown over top for warmth.

There was a knock on the door before his new husband entered not waiting for permission. Thorin was tall for a dwarf but not as tall as Dwalin and he had thick black hair and a thick black beard a few braids held with intricate and expensive clasps.

Thorin was in his nightwear too and he was wearing the same blue coat edged with fur from earlier. Bilbo breathed in a calming breath before rising to greet his husband with a smile.

"Your majesty." Bilbo greeted with a small bow before drawing Thorin softly to the comfortable sofa set before the fire.

"Bilbo." Thorin returned with a nod of his head a curious look in his eyes as the hobbit bade Thorin sit down before handing him a tankard of ale and indicating he could eat some of the biscuits and scones laid out.

"I was wondering if you would be interested in hearing a tale? A story? I was the storyteller for the Shire." Bilbo demurred, he would tell the tale whether he had permission or not.

"Do as you wish." Thorin said, for once feeling quite mellow and not minding listening to a tale. Bilbo took a sip of the spiced wine to settle his nerves enjoying the warmth and the rich earthy flavour.

Bilbo crossed his legs seating himself on the floor with the fire to his back in front of Thorin. He opened his mouth and began weaving his tale, the flickering of the fire light shadowing his face and adding an emphasis to the story enthralling Thorin.

Bilbo wove his tale expertly making an enchanting fabric weaving the threads with burning purpose.

"Belladonna was a mermaid, daughter of the King of the merpeople, Bullroarer Took. She was the sixth daughter and also the fairest of them all with her fair face, joyful smile and dancing eyes.

Bullroarer Took had twelve children in all but none could match Belladonna's zest for life, her magnificent spirit. She was always curious of the things that went on, every question needed an answer and when no one could give her one she gave her own explanation laughing gaily when she was wrong and nodding when correct.

The mermaids were not allowed to go to the surface but Belladonna always curious couldn't resist swimming up to find out what the surface was like. It was there she met a strange bird completely grey and with feathers that resembled a long grey beard named Gandalf.

It was soon after Belladonna had befriended Gandalf that she learnt that actual people lived on the surface, people like the mermaids just with their tail separated into two appendages that they used to move around.

Whenever Belladonna found something strange that had to have come from the people who lived on the surface she would ask Gandalf about its function and use. Gandalf could only speak from what he had observed and sometimes (so as not to show he didn't know the answer) gave out the wrong answer.

Belladonna thought a fork was used to hold up your hair from Gandalf's erroneous remark.

Belladonna placed the fork along with her other trinkets, items from the surface world that had ended up under the sea.

One day Belladonna went up to the surface looking at the shore with undisguised longing, she so wanted to see what being a surface dweller was like although she would miss her tail dearly (and her family and friends of course).

Belladonna stayed there through the night lost in her day dreams barely noticing the storm that brew up. It was only the sound of splintering wood, shouts and screams of terror that snapped her back to reality.

She watched in horror as a ship with many people on board crashed into the rocks and sank most of the people managing to swim to the shore safely but a few trapped in the wreckage or killed by the remains of the ship.

Cautiously Belladonna swam closer noticing an odd movement from in the water. She swam down to find it was a man slowly sinking eyes closed as if he was asleep but air was trickling through his mouth and nose so she knew he wasn't dead.

Swiftly she swam to him tugging him with all her might to the surface of the water holding him above her as she swam to the shore.

Carefully Belladonna placed the man on the shore cradling his head on her lap and running a hand through his hair as she sung him soft lullabies in her soothing lilting voice. He did not stir all the hours Belladonna sat there watching over him singing sweetly.

It wasn't until she heard a voice approaching that Belladonna slipped away from the man hiding behind a rock so she could see he got to safety.

It seemed the person coming close had been looking for the man; he called the man Belladonna had saved Prince Bungo. Belladonna tasted the word in her mouth curiously, Bungo.

She felt a strange ache in her heart as she watched Bungo awaken and be taken away by the man. She ached when she noticed Bungo look to the sea as if wondering where his rescuer had gone.

Over the next few days Belladonna acted a little different to normal, constantly looking towards the surface and shore with longing sighs and subdued. Eventually Bullroarer Took managed to get the story from one of Belladonna's friends and he was furious. Contact with humans was forbidden!

He swiftly sought out Belladonna only to be confronted by her collection of human utensils. Blinded by his rage he destroyed her trinkets shouting at her to put aside her silly ideas and to go to her room.

Belladonna devastated by her broken ornaments so carefully looked after and so meticulously sorted swam away, not to her rooms.

Why oh why couldn't she be a human? Belladonna lamented mournfully.

It was after hours of swimming that Belladonna came across two eels named Shelob and Sméagol who bade her follow them if she wanted her hearts desire.

Belladonna followed the two eels willingly as they led her to the sea witch Sauron. There Belladonna struck a deal, her voice in exchange for two legs. But there was a catch, if she didn't get a kiss from her prince before three days were up she would turn back into a mermaid.

Belladonna and Prince Bungo spent three days in each other's company always getting interrupted whenever they were about to kiss." Bilbo yawned and halted the story.

"I apologise, my king, but I am weary. Might I continue this story tomorrow evening?" Bilbo asked politely feigning weariness.

And Thorin too found himself weary yawning also despite wanting to know the end of the story. He nodded and left the chambers. Bilbo sighed with relief before tidying up and getting into his own bed. Bilbo fell asleep with a triumphant smile gracing his face.

* * *

Dwalin was amazed (and pleased) to find no order of execution for Bilbo the next morning. He was also confused because instead of looking surprised Bilbo and Frodo looked smug.

"What did you do?" Dwalin asked Bilbo. Bilbo shrugged.

"I am a storyteller for the Shire so I told a story to the King. But near to the end I was too sleepy to finish it so I told the King I would complete it tonight." Bilbo explained. Dwalin laughed slapping his thighs.

"Good show laddie." Dwalin complemented. It was a clever trick.

"I hope you have enough stories for a lifetime then." Dwalin said seriously as Bilbo rose to complete his first duties as Consort. Bilbo smiled gently.

"I am the storyteller. I always have a story." Bilbo stated confidently.


	16. Chapter 16 PoliceDetectives

**9. Police/Detectives **

Mild Thorin/Bilbo.

Disclaimer: I don't own The Hobbit or 30 Day AU prompts.

* * *

Thorin scowled stomping into his office through the long corridor.

"Oh, dear. He looks in a foul mood." Ori near whispered to Bofur. Bofur nodded scuttling back into his office dragging Ori along so neither of them would incur Thorin's wrath.

Dwalin took one look at Thorin and scrubbed his face chasing after him with obvious reluctance. Thorin's office door slammed shut and everyone in the vicinity collectively winced.

"I don't envy you at all." Gloin said with a shake of his head to Dwalin.

Dwalin bit his tongue opening the door without bothering to knock and immediately closing it behind him before ducking out of the way of a thrown paper weight. Dwalin eyed the paper weight warily, it was a solid metal contraption ie: if it had hit him it would have hurt. Dwalin glared at Thorin before taking a seat in the chair opposite Thorin.

"What did he return this time?" Dwalin asked well used to the routine. Although, Dwalin eyed the paper weight again, it didn't usually warrant death via paper weight, Thorin usually chucked a pen or at the most a box of tissues.

For months now a particularly good thief, going by the moniker, 'Sting', had been stealing as usual but without fail anything 'Sting' stole nearly everything would be returned. The first time it happened 'Sting' stole a pair of priceless statues from a private collectors collection, one mysteriously ended up in Thorin's mailbox along with some asparagus foliage. The other statue was found on top of the statue outside the police station three days later.

The second time 'Sting' looted a jewellery store and nearly all of the jewellery ended up on Thorin's dinner table, inside his secure home, with a single begonia.

The third time Thorin opened his fridge to find the missing uncut diamonds 'Sting' had stolen from a diamond cutting shop, along with a tiny sprig of almond from trees in Spain.

It was then that Ori, one of the younger and newer additions to Thorin's unit, suggested that maybe the flowers meant something. Thorin didn't like having to tell his unit about his weird stalker but he did have to explain how he managed to find some of the missing items.

So they focused on the flowers. Asparagus foliage=fascination Begonia=beware, a fanciful nature, Almond=promise. Thorin scowled all the more especially when Ori sighed and said it was awfully romantic.

* * *

xxx

There were chuckles and laughs coming from Ori's office. And Dori was scowling at the door. Dwalin carefully asked Dori what was happening.

"What has happened is my brother, Nori, has decided to grace us with his unwanted presence. And Ori just accepted him back, like he hadn't disappeared six months ago and like he doesn't waltz in and out of our lives like nothing has happened!" Dori exclaimed loud enough that nearly everyone in the office heard. The sudden silence from Ori's office said that the people in the office heard as well.

The door opened slowly and Ori and a man who resembled Ori but with a intricate star shaped hairdo, so Nori then, stepped out followed by a slightly sheepish looking Bofur and a short man with curly honey coloured hair both looking like they wanted nothing to do with the impending sibling spat. The honey haired man in particular eyed the three warily.

"Gentlemen, why don't you go and enjoy a nice cup of tea and some biscuits, take a long break and have a chat." The short man suggested mildly. Dori deflated looking tired as he nodded. The short man whispered something in Nori's ear and shoved him in the directed Dori had gone off. Bilbo caught Ori's arm before he could follow.

"Easy, your brother Nori has some grovelling to do and many apologies to make. They'll be back soon. Anyway, little Ori all grown up and a police man to boot! Tell all." The short man demanded with a cheeky grin the grin widening as Ori blushed.

"I'm taller than you! I'm not little anymore, Bilbo." Ori said looking slightly peeved. Bilbo looked at him mournfully.

"Ori, I hate to tell you this, but everyone is taller than me, it's really not a great feat." Bilbo said in a serious tone. Ori chuckled lightly shoving Bilbo in the shoulder.

"I don't know, I think there might be a baby somewhere that's shorter than you, a baby ant..." Ori said mock thoughtfully.

"Hush you." Bilbo scowled the cheery grin on his face ruining his scowl.

"What about Frodo? Your cousin? Last I heard he was shorter than you." Ori asked curiously.

"The lad it seems has left me. He has joined the taller than the midget group. I was terribly sad to see him go." Bilbo pretended to wipe a tear from his eye. "No he's shooting up like a bean pole; he might make it to five foot seven, a travesty."

Ori laughed. "Your whole family is weirdly short.

"Yes well, that's because third cousins married third cousins. I really don't want to think of it. I'm just glad my parents weren't near relations, their grandparents may have been second cousins however..."

"And yet despite that fact you're shorter than them all." Ori teased, laughing at Bilbo's pout.

"Enough teasing, you so-and-so. Please, introduce me to your esteemed colleagues."

"Oh!" Ori started looking around at his colleagues with an owlish blink. "Right, well, that's Dwalin, Balin, Gloin, Oin, Bombur, Bofur, Bifur, Fili, Kili and Thorin. You already know Dori. Everyone this is Bilbo Baggins, a friend of the family and a colleague of Nori's." Ori introduced everyone pointing to each in turn. Bilbo grinned and waved at them.

"Well, Ori, it was nice seeing you again but me and Nori have plans to see that art collectors new collection just up the road. See you soon." Bilbo waved goodbye and went off to find Nori.

* * *

xxx

Thorin was chasing a lead, involving 'Sting'.

They had been given a tip off; an old biddy had seen a shadow and phoned the police.

It seemed 'Sting' was attempting to steal paintings now, from the new collection opening a Mr. Smaug had opened. Thorin was pleased Smaug was being targeted, again, he was an utter arsehole, but well, stealing was against the law and he was a cop.

Thorin stealthily crept across the top of the building eyeing the shadow perched on the railing looking at the stars. Thorin was close enough to strike when his foot landed on a small piece of gravel making an audible sound.

At once the masked and dark clothed spun round forgetting he was perched on a railing and tipped backwards with a small yelp. Thorin leapt forward catching the man's wrist in a tight grip. The man clenched his teeth, his arm jerking from the weight of his body. Thorin could feel the railing digging into his chest and he pulled the man up keeping hold of his arm. The moment the man's feet touched the ground Thorin clapped his wrist in a shiny new pair of handcuffs.

The man huffed a small ironic chuckle but didn't say a word as he followed Thorin. Thorin didn't ask what the joke was.

"Thank you for the daring rescue." 'Sting' said mildly in a warm honey toned voice that Thorin swore he had heard before.

Thorin personally handed 'Sting' over to a fellow copper. Thorin was supposed to be off work three hours ago.

The next morning he awoke to find a flower on his dining table along with his phone which he didn't recall was missing. 'Sting' probably lifted it from him. The thought made Thorin freeze; he had caught 'Sting' last night, so how had the flower got into his house? Thorin punched the wall, hard.

He should have taken 'Sting' into custody personally; 'Sting' was crafty and clever at escaping and evading capture. At least he knew 'Sting' was short and lithe.

Sweet pea=you have my thanks.

* * *

xxx

After that evening when Thorin had stopped 'Sting' from falling off the roof and 'Sting' had evaded capture 'Sting' now let himself get close enough to talk.

Thorin's and 'Sting's' conversations were distinctly flirty, according to Dwalin, Thorin punched him for that comment, already on edge from the flowers sent to him always with a stolen item.

Delphinium= levity, fun, big hearted, ardent attachment, joy, Gladiolus= strength of character, honour, conviction, Fennel= strength, Elderflower= compassion and Coriander= lust.

* * *

xxx

Thorin winced as shouting met his ears. Nori was visiting and he and Dori had got into another argument. A mug thrust under his nose made him look up, or down. Bilbo handed him a mug of coffee. Thorin nodded, grunting in thanks. He sipped at it surprised when it was made just how he liked it, two sugars and a small dash of milk.

Bilbo grimaced as the shouting got louder. "They even argued when Nori wasn't there, over the phone or to an imaginary version it didn't matter, Nori was always complaining about Dori and going off into rants." Bilbo commented blowing on his own tea.

"Dori complains of Nori frequently, but he doesn't usually lose his composure like this." Thorin added rubbing the sides of his head.

The next day Thorin received two flowers as well as his tie clip. Dandelion= coquetry and Thorn-apple= disguise.


	17. Chapter 17 In a Band

**29. In A Band **

**Disclaimer.**

**Warning: severe claustrophobia main theme...um...**

* * *

Bilbo sighed scrubbing his face as yet again Thorin was flirting with the press, signing pictures with his face splashed on and ignoring the rest of them.

Bilbo wouldn't have minded that Thorin was basking in his fame (well he would have because showing off was annoying) if Thorin wasn't supposed to be giving Bilbo a lift back to their apartment.

Even then it wouldn't have been too bad apart from the fact that Bilbo was claustrophobic and tended to freak out when surrounded by people.

So while Thorin was flirting, signing pictures and CD albums Bilbo was trying very hard not to go into a blind panic, crushed in amongst people. He finally managed to get free from the rabid fans clamouring towards Thorin with the judicious use of hard elbow jabs.

Bilbo collapsed against a wall at the back of the room they had been doing their gig for that night. The others in the band had all gone home or were dinking at the bar and it was only Bilbo and Thorin left.

Thorin was the lead guitarist and sang while Bilbo was the pianist and he wrote most of the lyrics they used as songs.

Bilbo, Thorin, Ori, Dori, Gloin, Oin, Dwalin and Balin made up the band called The Company. Bilbo had rolled his eyes once when he heard Thorin refer to it as Thorin's Company to the press. None of the band had been pleased with that errant comment.

Bilbo consciously slowed his breathing employing the tried and true method of relaxing his mother had taught him. Clench his toes, breath out for five counts, unclench his toes breath in for five counts all the while mentally singing 'God Save the Queen'. He gradually lessened his clenched hands wincing when he realised his blunt nails had pierced through skin and small droplets of blood had stained his blue shirt cuffs. Bilbo placed a shaking hand over his eyes.

"You okay?" Bilbo whirled round startled at the quiet question before relaxing when he saw Ori. "What am I saying, of course you're not. Come on, let's go outside." Ori said managing to usher Bilbo outside without touching him, Ori had witnessed Bilbo having a panic attack before and he knew that touching Bilbo was an utter no go when Bilbo was in this nervy state.

Bilbo shakily exhaled, breath misting in the freezing air. Ori tutted when he caught sight of Bilbo's mangled palms and the bite marks on Bilbo's bottom lip where he had nearly bitten through it when trying not to panic. Bilbo ignored the slight stinging, it was better than pounding his fists against the wall; he had broken a bone or two in his hand the last time _that_ had happened.

It was not good for his piano playing.

Bilbo was shaking and it wasn't from the cold.

He reached into his pocket drawing out a cigarette and a lighter hands trembling too much for him to light the end and the flame of the lighter getting much too close to his skin. Someone gently snatched the lighter away and held it steady lighting the cigarette held between Bilbo's lips.

Bilbo took a long drag closing his eyes to relish in the warm smoke filling his lungs and the slight relaxation the nicotine and the routine of it gave him. Bilbo opened his eyes taking back his lighter.

"Thank you." Bilbo said to the man who had helped him. The man was tall with longish dark brown hair and a stern face that was softened by the slight smile he wore.

"No problem. My names Bard, nice to meet you." The man greeted not holding out a hand to shake much to Bilbo's relief.

"Bilbo and this is Ori, nice to meet you too." Bilbo said. Ori frowned at his cigarette.

"That's a terrible habit, Bilbo." Ori chided eyeing the smoke with distaste stepping away slightly Bilbo nodded in agreement even as he breathed out a cloud of smoke angling his head away from Ori politely.

"Yes it is. And if you ever start I'll tell Dori." Bilbo threatened good naturedly while being utterly serious.

"You're an utter hypocrite. And I wouldn't touch one of those cancer sticks." Ori said mildly shooting yet another disdainful look towards the burning cigarette.

"It calms me down." Bilbo explained in a matter of fact tone, too be honest it was probably the only thing grounding him enough so that he didn't collapse. Bard looked slightly concerned.

"Yes I saw you looking a bit overwhelmed in there; I couldn't make my way through the crowd though." Bard said Bilbo smiled mirthlessly.

"I am somewhat claustrophobic." Bilbo explained with a wry smile, Bard's brow cleared understanding filling his face.

"I can't stand elevators, I fainted in one once. One of the women in the elevator, a small slip of a thing, caught me stopping me from hitting the floor." Bard offered.

"I don't like spiders, absolutely terrified of them Nori was bitten by one once, he spent days in hospital. I don't like green food either, it's green." Ori chimed in. The three men looked at each other in silence before bursting out laughing, slightly hysterical laughing in Bilbo's case but he could feel himself relaxing slightly with the nice banter and friendly chatting.

"Why were you waiting here if you don't like crowds? If you don't mind me asking." Bard asked curiously, everyone knew that Thorin Durin would get swarmed by fans after a gig that's why the others left so quickly, to avoid the crush, lots of people liked the size of Thorin's bank account and his rugged good looks. Bilbo shrugged.

"Thorin's supposed to be driving me to our apartment but he's a little busy." Bilbo said gesturing vaguely to the crowd inside. Ori clicked his tongue disapprovingly.

"He should have just driven you home straight away, not stayed while you nearly had a breakdown." Ori said a slight flush on his cheeks betraying how irritated he was with Thorin, Thorin had never appreciated Bilbo properly in Ori's opinion.

"You don't drive." Bard stated more than asked. Bilbo nodded.

"Links to the claustrophobia." Bilbo explained succinctly another one of his wry grins pulling up the corners of his mouth.

"This has got to stop. Next time you're taking a lift with me, I don't care if it's half an hour out of my way. I'd rather drive for an extra hour than see you collapse and have to take you to hospital again." Ori said in a no nonsense tone.

Ori had taken him to hospital three times. One time had been fairly recently and it had been because of the crush of people surrounding Thorin, Bilbo had been catatonic. The other two times had been a while ago, one time Bilbo had had hyperthermia, the other Bilbo had forgotten to breath properly so passed out from oxygen deprivation.

Bilbo nodded, knowing protesting would not be in his best interests, Ori could be more stubborn than Thorin at times. Which Bilbo had thought was impossible, he wilfully ignored his own stubborn streak forgetting in a battle of wills Bilbo could come out far superior in terms of mulish bullheadedness.

"You alright?" Bard asked Bilbo as he chucked his cigarette butt into the bin. Bilbo gave a half shrug nod, he wasn't but there was nothing to really do about it. He was far more relaxed than before, so that was a good thing.

"Well I'll be going then. Take care." Bard said with a wave as he got into his car. "By the way great playing." He complimented out the open window while reversing. Ori blushed.

"I think you could do better than Thorin." Ori said gently.

"I know, but you're taken." Bilbo said with a wink. Ori blushed again.

"You gonna be alright in the car?" Ori asked worriedly. Bilbo paled but nodded, he would sit there clutching the door handle in a white knuckled grip but he wouldn't panic again this evening, he was determined.

Ori's constant looks of concern sent to his white knuckled grip of the car door handle did not help one bit.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo woke up from his slumber in his and Thorin's bed when the front door slammed. He blearily looked at the clock and groaned. It was barely five in the morning and he had only gone to bed two hours ago unable to face sleep when he had first returned home. Instead Bilbo had attempted to relax with a cup of tea.

Thorin stomped loudly into the bedroom, Bilbo winced a headache hammering against his skull, pounding unmercifully and the pain causing his stomach to roll nauseously.

"Where were you?" Thorin demanded.

"Huh?" Was Bilbo's coherent response.

"I couldn't find you after the gig. I was waiting there like an idiot. I had to ring Ori to find out where you were. I said I'd take you home, why did you go with Ori? It's completely out of Ori's way to bring you here." Thorin said irately.

Bilbo shot a lingering glance at Thorin before slowly getting out of bed stretching his tired limbs as he pulled on a pair of jeans not deigning to answer Thorin's questions his anger way past boiling point but his exhaustion overpowering all quelling the venomous words that wanted to slip past his closed lips.

"What are you doing?" Thorin demanded as Bilbo grabbed some clothes shoving them into a rucksack.

"I left with Ori because after waiting hours for you to leave your fans, I was moments away from collapsing." Bilbo snapped shoving some books as well into his bag. "I apologise for not pushing past the crowd to inform you of my change of plans." Bilbo muttered this last sarcastically with a bite to his usually calm, soothing voice.

"Look, just because your jealous I have fans is no reason to leave me in the lurch. And you always panic." Thorin said flippantly.

"I am not jealous. I don't want fans and I don't like being around hoards of people. And I only panic so much because you decide to chat with your fans and they gather around..." Bilbo stopped abruptly heaving a sigh, he was not getting into this, he wasn't jealous and he wasn't needy like Thorin had implied, more than once.

Bilbo grabbed a few personal items, a wash kit, wallet, keys and his phone before barging past Thorin.

"Where are you going?" Thorin spluttered as Bilbo opened the front door.

"Away from you." Bilbo snapped. "Sorry, just, I can't deal with this anymore, we're through. I quit the band yesterday as well." Bilbo informed Thorin abruptly, ringing for a taxi as he walked out their apartment door and to the park lugging his rucksack, slamming the door shut on Thorin's gobsmacked face.

He couldn't deal with taxi's normally but riding on the high of his utter rage at Thorin and the exhaustion weighing in his bones Bilbo just clung tight the handle and closed his eyes.

He wasn't needy, no matter what Thorin implied, just because he hated cars (and most forms of transport, bicycles were alright), didn't like crowds of about more than ten people, had severe claustrophobia...okay, maybe he had a slight problem...

Bilbo sighed, he was going to have to try therapy, maybe that might help him slightly, maybe he could get tips with how to deal with it. He probably should have done that years ago but the thought of talking with a stranger, having them pick his brains, was just a little too off putting. But he hadn't got better; his claustrophobia seemed to have gotten worse recently...Ori had been telling him to go to one for years.

He was shaky, white faced and wide eyed when he got to Ori's and in a jittery mood but he had survived the taxi ride. Ori did however look very concerned as to Bilbo's mental state.

Bilbo managed to get two sentences out before he collapsed on the couch unable to speak further. "Dumped Thorin. Quit the Band."

* * *

xxx

Ori walked into the room the band practised in hesitantly. He wasn't fully sure what he was going to do, Bilbo had told him not to quit the band just because he did but Ori wasn't sure he wanted to continue anyway, he had a better offer from another band, one that played music Ori preferred over The Company's choices.

To be perfectly honest Ori had been just a little too timid to broach the fact he was going to leave the band and join another and Bilbo's leaving the band only gave him the slight boost of courage needed to voice his plans.

Loud laughter caught his attention and Ori wandered over out of sight of the people chatting and laughing. Ori's cheeks flushed with rage and his hands clenched into fists. How dare Thorin say that about Bilbo! How dare he imply Bilbo was anything less than a good person, a good friend and he had been more than a good boyfriend to Thorin!

Bilbo had a kind streak a mile wide, was endlessly caring and polite coupled with a sarcastic witty humour, he was Ori's best friend since primary school.

Ori stalked right up to Thorin disregarding the others wide eyes at his uncharacteristic behaviour, he didn't care if they listened in, maybe they would even feel ashamed of laughing! Ori stood right in front of Thorin and poked him hard in the chest.

"How dare you! You were an utter arse to Bilbo! You treated him like he was at your beck and call then berated him for being late for anything even though he had been doing as you asked!

You didn't even know he had been admitted into hospital until three weeks after the event and then you brushed it off like it wasn't your fault! He only had such a severe panic attack because _your_ groupies swarmed and you couldn't be bothered to check up on him! He started smoking again just to deal with the stress _you_ cause him!

I've been telling him for months that he was way too good for you. He turned up an utter wreck at my house this morning; he had even taken a taxi! David Smaug was better for him than you!" Ori finished panting after his rant before he pivoted on one heel and moved towards the exit. Utter silence followed his wake. Ori got to the door then turned eyes glittering furiously.

It hadn't been his plan to come here and shout at Thorin but Thorin had been deriding Bilbo, spouting unfair accusations and lies and something inside Ori had just snapped.

Bilbo was his best friend; the kind hearted boy who had befriended the scrawny timid boy who ghosted through the school library near silently, Bilbo had been his first proper friend and an amazingly true and loyal one at that.

"Balin, apologies for the inconvenience but I quit, another band offered me a better offer. Goodbye." And with that Ori left.

Thorin stood there stunned. And the worst part was he couldn't even honestly deny any of the accusations. It was a bitter pill to swallow especially since he loathed David Smaug (and vice versa) and constantly tried to outdo him.

Surely he hadn't been a worse boyfriend than Smaug?!


	18. Chapter 18 Hospital

**27. Hospital **

**Medical inaccuracies...I am really not good with medical terminology and reality despite all the time I have spent in hospital so sorry if it's wrong or inaccurate.**

**Disclaimer.**

**Warning: mentions of serious diseases(?). **

**Gen.**

* * *

Bilbo grinned as the doors of the ward he was staying in opened to reveal his parents, Bungo and Belladonna Baggins.

Bilbo ignored the slight tightening of Belladonna's lips and the faint creases of Bungo's brow that showed they could see he was worse.

"Did you get it?" Bilbo asked excitedly only just remembering not to jump up as he was attached to a few machines and that the last time he had jumped up quickly he had passed out...not fainted, he didn't faint he had told his friend Bofur adamantly. Several times. Bilbo's fingers twitched betraying his eagerness. Belladonna laughed a musical sound that was less bright now than it had been just two years ago.

Bungo pulled a book out of the bag he was carrying and handed it over carefully. Bilbo's eyes widened as he clasped the book carefully on his lap fingers twitching with the urge to devour it. Bilbo restrained himself; he could read it later when his parents weren't there.

Bilbo looked up from the book just in time to catch Bungo's and Belladonna's shared look of grief. Bilbo smiled as if he hadn't seen and started the one topic that his mother could speak for hours on distracting all of them from reality. Her extended family.

"Well Peregrin Took is certainly in a lot of trouble for the prank he pulled last week, he would have gotten away with it too if..." Bilbo closed his eyes letting the soothing sound of his mother's voice wash over him and barely fifteen minutes into their visit Bilbo fell asleep the melodic tones of his mother's voice keeping the smile on his face even as his muscles relaxed in slumber.

Bilbo woke up several hours later, he hadn't meant to fall asleep, he'd probably worried them even more now!

Bilbo huffed slowly getting to his feet; he had to move slowly now, more like his grandfather than the seventeen year old he was.

At least he could still get to the toilet and back without assistance Bilbo thought.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo had always been small, not just short but thin boned as well, whenever his relatives saw him they would always fuss, passing him food to 'fatten him up properly' but when talking to Belladonna they would always say 'frail', with worried eyes.

They told his cousins to not be as rough with Bilbo, to be gentle with Bilbo.

When Bilbo was seven he was diagnosed with Leukaemia, Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia.

Bilbo had looked absolutely pitiful, much too thin, always covered in bruises from just tapping into things and whenever he had a nose bleed it lasted hours refusing to clot.

He had spent a year in and out of hospital being treated with Chemotherapy. He had survived (85% of children did) but he was frailer than ever and it took him a while to gain some healthy weight and muscle, the gaunt look didn't fade for months.

As a consequence Bilbo was homeschooled but due to the sheer amount of relatives he was never lacking for company his own age and he joined a couple of clubs as well.

All had been well.

Then at age sixteen Bilbo had been diagnosed with a different strain of Leukaemia, Chronic Myelogenous Leukaemia.

The drug treatment had seemed to work for a year but soon it had become clear that Bilbo was slowly deteriorating. Bilbo had been admitted into hospital and they were searching for a correct match for a bone marrow transplant, as neither Bungo nor Belladonna matched up correctly.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo considered his next move carefully. If he moved his knight Ori would take his queen... Choices, choices...

Ori sighed restlessly. Bilbo grinned sympathetically. "Bored?" Bilbo asked stretching carefully wincing as his bones clicked.

"There's only so many times you can play chess before it becomes dull." Ori said packing away the pieces carefully. Bilbo nodded.

"I could say the same about reading The Hunchback of Notre-Dame." Bilbo remarked pointedly. Ori flushed, he read and re-read that book seemingly endlessly, Bilbo swore he could quote whole pages.

"But it's such a heart rending story, how she is accused of murdering her love, Quasimodo's absolute devotion towards her and him trying to protect her from everyone." Ori state earnestly, Bilbo chuckled gently. "Plebeian." Ori sniffed mockingly. "You're probably one of those people who prefers Fifty Shades of Grey to any classical literature."

Bilbo nodded mock seriously. "Of course, The Hunchback of Notre-Dame just doesn't have enough eroticism in the story." Bilbo lapsed into giggles along with Ori, they had dared each other to ask one of the nurses to supply them with a copy of Fifty Shades of Grey while remaining straight faced. After they had got a copy they had proceeded to read it aloud, loud enough for the rest of the ward to hear.

They had scandalised a couple of people.

Bilbo had shrugged when his father had scolded him, he and Ori were two teenagers stuck in a ward, it was inevitable that they would get bored enough to do something like that. At least they hadn't tried to speed down the ward in a hospital bed; apparently Bofur had done that when visiting his cousin in hospital and ended up in hospital himself with several broken bones.

"That's good to know." A voice drawled from behind Bilbo, Bilbo squeaked and tried to turn around, he ended up spinning round too fast and dropping down in a dead faint.

Ori gave Thorin a dry look. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't make my friends faint." Ori remarked eyeing Thorin holding up Bilbo's limp form with amusement.

"..ssed out. Not faint." A slurred voice stated and Bilbo opened his eyes slowly a petulant look on his face. "I don't faint, I pass out." Bilbo said more strongly, he had collapsed so much recently that he couldn't even muster up embarrassment for the act.

Bilbo slowly stood up as a nurse entered the ward. "Thanks for catching me, they're painful hospital floors, I don't know why they don't make the floors squishy, passing out would be a lot more comfortable then." Bilbo groused ignoring Ori's laughter and the Thorin's chuckles.

"Well the idea is to discourage you from fainting so, no luck there, Bilbo." The nurse said with a grin checking Bilbo's vitals and ushering him back to his own bed (next to Ori's anyway) and sticking another drip to him.

"I don't faint! I pass out." Bilbo whined. "I'll look like a pin cushion soon." Bilbo said with a cheeky grin.

"A very sweet little pin cushion." The nurse agreed patting Bilbo on the cheek ignoring Bilbo's scowl at being called 'sweet' and 'little'. Ori laughed at him again, the bastard. "Eat more bananas." Was the nurses stern order before she bustled away again. Bilbo yawned.

"I don't faint." Bilbo protested again, fruitlessly.

"Of course not." Ori agreed with a mischievous twinkle in his eye. He waited until Bilbo was looking pleased that someone agreed with him before he continued. "You don't faint, you swoon." Ori laughed at Bilbo's vehement denial and duck out of the way of a thrown pillow.

* * *

Left it open ended...its up to you if Bilbo survives or not.

(I hate killing off main characters...)


	19. Chapter 19 Pirates

**14. Pirates Bofur/Bilbo.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Hobbit or Pirates of the Caribbean.**

**Based on Pirates of the Caribbean, Calipso and Davy Jones story.**

**Warning: Violence (not in detail and not really as bad as mentioned in the Hobbit or Pirates of the Caribbean). Smut later in the chapter.**

* * *

xxx

Bilbo absently toyed with some string his mind miles away, worlds away even. He had cursed his mortal form many times over the years, hundreds of years, he longed to return to his home but the thrice dammed Brethren court, the pirate court, had trapped him in his mortal form.

Ever since they had banded together and with a little help from his _dearest love, _trapped him, caged him, he missed the sea. It almost physically hurt to be apart from the sea and sailing around on top of the water or swimming in it just wasn't the same. He was cut off from it, bereft of its soothing quiet murmurs and terrifying rage.

So Bilbo had secluded himself in a small hut located on an island that cannot be found except by those who already know where it is hidden. At the moment being surrounded by the sea was as close as he could get.

He had been god of the sea, just as fickle and cruel, just as inviting and fathomless as the ocean. He had been the home of pirates, ruler of the waves and tides and now he was just Bilbo, trapped on an island of his own making and locked in his mortal form.

He had once been god of the sea unfettered by the mortal body he was trapped in and he had been magnificent and terrible, uncontrollable and uncontained.

Bilbo recalled his lover, Bofur, now commonly known as Davy Jones and feared the length and breadth of the sea. He remembered their dalliance, full of outrageous flirting and exquisite kindness. Bilbo had come to Bofur clad in his human form and Bofur had pledged his life and love to Bilbo forever and a day.

And so Bilbo had tasked him with the duty of ferrying the souls of the dead, those that died at sea, to the afterlife. Bofur was essentially immortal so long as he didn't step upon dry land apart from one day every ten years. But Bofur had deserted his purpose, he didn't ferry those who died at sea to their final resting place and so as he twisted his purpose his visage changed to fit. Bofur no longer looked like the man Bilbo had known but a monster, tentacles leading from his face, a crab claw for a hand, a wooden stump for a leg.

But that was all after he had given the Brethren court the information with which to trap Bilbo. Despite Bofur's betrayal Bilbo couldn't help loving him still.

Pirates were not what they had once been, they had tamed the sea (which was never meant to be tamed) and so were softer, no longer the harsh thrilling (and oh so spirited) plunderers they had once been. Now pirates cowered under the force of the Navies and ran instead of holding their own, instead of sending the various Naval ships turning tail.

Bofur had once been light-hearted and cheery, now he was melancholic and cruel. It was for this reason Bilbo agreed to accompany The Company, a crew, to rescue their captain, Thorin 'Oakenshield', from 'Davy Jones' locker. Bilbo needed Thorin to come back to the world of the living because he was one of the nine pirate lords and he needed him so he could be set free from his bonds once and for all.

Bilbo watched his breath mist in the freezing air, ice bergs drifting past mostly submerged by the placid water. Bilbo looked up at the stars dressed in his usual shirt and trousers cut off at the knee messily, feet bare even as the crew piled on all the furs they could grab their hands on while their teeth chattered, Bilbo was unmoved by the cold.

Bilbo's lip curled as he watched the oceans placid movements, if, no _when_, when he regained his true form the pirate court would find out just how cruel he could be.

Bilbo had got an agreement from Balin, the man in charge when Thorin wasn't there, and Thorin's first mate. When the Brethren court met up, Balin would gather each of the tokens from the nine pirate lords and set fire to them burning them and speak the words that would set Bilbo free, free from his mortal shackles that chained him oh so cruelly.

The sea was his soul and the Brethren court had torn him from it, preventing his return.

* * *

xxx

_Bilbo stood in the shallows the sea lapping at his ankles like a lovers gentle caress. It felt odd, parading around in this form. He wasn't instantly recognisable as a god but rather he resembled a short young man, honey coloured curls and ocean blue eyes._

_Bilbo didn't flinch or jump as a warm body pressed up against his back, warm breath fanning his neck as moustache and beard braids tickled. Bilbo stayed where he was not responding to the warm touch or leaning into the freely offered embrace._

_He wriggled his toes in the sand, mind on storms more than five days sail hence and the utter havoc raged destroying lives for some, while others scavenged the destroyed ships with glee._

_Bilbo tilted his head curiously to the sky looking up at the twinkling specs. It was odd, parading around pretending to be human, odd but fascinating. It was so very different experiencing a human life and Bilbo could almost feel himself changing._

_He was very changeable by nature, just like the sea could turn from a hurricane to gentle still waters in a matter of minutes he could turn from bright burning anger to soft tender love. _

_Sometimes he hated that Bofur was changing him and at others he rejoiced, basking in the warm feelings._

_Bofur sighed against the hairs of his neck breathing in the reassuring scent, of the ocean, a salty breeze mixed with muskiness that all human men and woman have but unique to each person. Bilbo was a mixture of a warm hearth fire and the cool ocean and Bofur never forgot it. Bilbo was just as untameable, uncontrollable as the ocean, and a hearth fire might warm the home but it could just as easily burn it down._

_How could he forget how utterly his own person Bilbo was when it shined from his eyes, the very colour of the depths of the ocean and just as unfathomable. There were many secrets left untold at the depths of the ocean and Bilbo's eyes hinted at them teasingly._

_But he loved him, loved Bilbo, loved him for his free nature just as he loved the sea. And Bilbo and the sea were one and the same._

_Bofur would wait until Bilbo acknowledged his presence and they would descend into their usual flirty banter or take their tryst to private quarters with an actual bed._

_Bilbo eventually stirred, breaking his perusal of the stars as he turned in Bofur's lose grip turning and nuzzling gently at Bofur's neck mischievous lips tracing a warm path down Bofur's neck. Bofur ran his palms up and down Bilbo's sides fingers ghosting towards the buttons of the shirt. Bilbo refused to wear anything other than trousers ripped at the knee and a shirt, he claimed clothing was far too restricting._

_People tended to look askance at someone wearing such an obviously fine shirt and trousers (despite the ripped off bottoms) yet not wearing any shoes or a jacket. Neither Bofur nor Bilbo cared for the stares, what did it matter what complete strangers thought of them? Bofur was a pirate with various misdeeds to his name and Bilbo a god of the sea, societies rules hardly benefitted them so why adhere?_

_Bilbo kissed down Bofur's chest undoing the ties and buttons of Bofur's shirt as he went clearing the skin for his tongue and lips. Bilbo knelt, his knees soaked by the water of the sea and he groaned at the thrill, he was with his lover, his Bofur, and with the sea. Bilbo gently tugged at the ties of Bofur's trousers thankful his lover had taken his boots off before joining him in the shallow water._

_Bofur tugged at his hair in warning that they really shouldn't do anything here, not in plain view of anyone wandering down to the beach and not in such a public place. Bilbo ignored him skilfully playing Bofur's body until he barely remembered his own name let alone societies conventions._

_Bilbo gently nosed at the hard flesh straining between Bofur's solid thighs. He was in a playful mood tonight, more gentle and teasing than normal. Bilbo tended to prefer hard and fast, quick satisfaction and blinding sensations, stirring their blood until it was racing, rampaging through their veins like the torrents and swift currents that flowed in the sea._

_Bilbo gently kissed the tip of Bofur's erection smiling cheekily up at Bofur as Bofur fought not to thrust into his face. Bilbo palmed the base of warm hard length licking at the silky skin, lapping like a cat and placing teasing nibbles down the entire length. Bofur's hand clenched in Bilbo's hair and Bilbo stilled his ministrations in warning, he did not appreciate being tugged around by his hair. Bofur's grip loosened at little and Bilbo continued._

_Eventually to Bofur's evident relief, the groan was of a man granted respite just before death, Bilbo sucked the length into his mouth throat relaxing to take it down fully, tongue twisting round the length tracing patterns discernible only to Bilbo._

_When his jaw started to ache Bilbo pulled off relishing Bofur's look of complete loss as he shuddered as cool air hit his throbbing arousal._

_Bilbo tugged Bofur down so that he was lying on his back in the shallow water, half his body in the air and half in the water._

_Bofur groaned with complete abandon as Bilbo straddled him. The cool water that occasionally hit his erection should have cooled his ardour but it did nothing of the sort, the cool waters occasional caress only inflamed him further. With hooded eyes Bofur watched Bilbo prepare himself swiftly and harshly, Bilbo did not like to wait after all._

_He could be as patient as the still waters at times but it was not Bilbo's natural state of being._

_Bilbo grabbed at Bofur's length holding and guiding it into his hastily prepared hole. Bilbo gasped along with Bofur as he was speared, sinking down onto the hot, hard length. Bilbo groaned as he sank down fully the burning stretching feeling utterly welcome and Bilbo clenched his muscles eliciting a hiss of pleasure from Bofur. Bilbo set the pace, slow for once, in time with the tides soothing motion. Despite the bruising hands on his hips and the building pressure of his impending orgasm Bilbo didn't speed up, he kept his pace slow, delighting in it and the way his thighs burned at the continued exertion._

_Bofur cursed as he attempted once again to thrust into the tight heat above but yet again Bilbo prevented him from thrusting in deep keeping his pace slow as it was. Bofur groaned in frustration tossing his head from side to side as his orgasm slowly edged closer and closer._

_Bilbo arched his spine groaning in pure pleasure as Bofur hit the sweet spot inside of him, panting Bilbo looked down capturing Bofur's gaze in his own._

_Bofur stared up at the deep blue gaze, the evident decadent pleasure evidenced by that searing glance, blown pupils and the flush on Bilbo's cheeks. Bofur in one swift move, calculated so that he didn't slip out of that wonderful tight heat, rolled them over so Bilbo was now the one half in the sea water and half out. And Bofur watched as Bilbo's pupils already blown wide with lust dilated further. Bilbo clutched at Bofur, his blunt finger nails dug into Bofur's shoulders as a wordless cry left his lips and his body tightened impossibly around Bofur's arousal._

_Bofur placed his forehead against Bilbo's and they panted against one another, breathing in each other's gasps._

_And Bofur thrust, hard, deep satisfying thrusts that made both of them groan to feel. Bilbo wound his legs around Bofur's narrow hips, arching his back so his chest and arousal brushed over Bofur's wiry chest hair. _

_"More." Bilbo breathed meshing their upper bodies together grinding into Bofur's thrusts. The dual feelings of being filled so pleasurably and feeling the sea churn gently beneath him spurring him on._

_Bofur snaked a clumsy hand down to pump Bilbo's straining arousal. Bilbo's body tightened fully, back arching in a way that had to be painful, fingers digging into the muscles on Bofur's shoulders and his inner muscles clenching, constraining around Bofur. Bilbo came silently and Bofur kept his eyes fixed on Bilbo's as they changed colour, the blue lightening as Bilbo released. Bofur came almost instantaneously as Bilbo's inner muscles clenched randomly, dragging him in, milking him for all his worth._

_Bofur flopped on top of Bilbo, spent. Bilbo slowly relaxed his fingers and lowered his spine so it was no longer painfully arched but he kept his legs wrapped around Bofur's waist, breathing heavily._

_It was an even more intense encounter than usual, touching the sea, having sex while semi submerged. Bilbo delighted in the feel of being surrounded by the ocean, his domain, with his lover Bofur still inside of him._

_Bilbo nosed Bofur's chin up and kissed him tongues entwining languorously, lazily dancing to a tune they had long perfected. Bilbo wriggled his hips in a purposeful motion flicking at Bofur's nipples and touching other erogenous zones feeling the softened length inside of him twitch and begin to swell._

_"Temptress. I swore I was far too spent for another round." Bofur groaned separating his mouth from Bilbo's and grinning down at him._

_"Ah, but you have to match the strength of the seas, you cannot be spent after one mere round. That was a starter, are you ready for the main course?" Bilbo questioned mischievous eyes meeting Bofur's own twinkling ones and his lips curling in a satisfied smile._

_"Impossible." Bofur breathed. For it was, impossible to match Bilbo, to tame the sea. And it made Bofur love Bilbo a little bit more and Bilbo loved Bofur all the more for loving this part of him, for loving all of him._

_Bilbo smiled, this one full of pure delight, an honest happy expression that lit up his features._

_And Bofur smiled back, not matching Bilbo, but meeting him. He couldn't match Bilbo, who was the sea a law unto itself, but he could meet him, would always meet him, that much Bofur could do._

* * *

xxx

Bilbo helped the pirates free their captain. He had known Thorin since he was a teenager and Bilbo liked his sheer stubbornness and will to succeed even as he cursed it.

Bilbo smiled as Thorin stared them over incredulously, he had certainly not thought he would ever see his old crew again (mixed with people not of his old crew), especially not in Davy Jones locker.

"Why should I come with you? Four of you have tried to kill me before and one of you succeeded." Thorin said glaring at Thranduil who sniffed disinterestedly.

"Ah, but you enjoyed it at the time." Bilbo said reminiscently. Thorin smiled involuntarily.

"Aye, it was memorable." Thorin said grinning fondly, Bilbo when utterly enraged was a sight to see.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo watched the souls of the dead with sorrow shining from his eyes, he couldn't help them, it was Bofur who was supposed to ferry the souls of the dead at sea to the afterlife.

"Don't leave the ship." Bilbo warned sharply as one of the crew members leaned towards the dead soul of his lover and another reached for his long departed brother.

"It was Davy Jones duty to ferry the souls of the dead and with that he was allowed to step on shore for one day every ten years to meet with his beloved. When he believed his beloved had forsaken him, he corrupted his purpose. He threw off his mortal name and became a monster, he was a man once." Bilbo explained to the crew who listened to the story enthralled.

Bilbo put the locket he had been fiddling with back under his shirt, hidden from view. It was one of two lockets, Bilbo had one, Bofur the other if he hadn't chucked into the depths of the ocean.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo waited, locked in the Brig until Balin came back from the Brethren court meeting with the nine pieces of eight.

Bilbo whirled around as he heard the tune from his locket, the one of only two, played. He smiled in welcome as he saw Bofur's changed features and the locket he held open. Bilbo dragged his out from under his shirt and opened it releasing the melody that was the counterpart to the one playing from Bofur's.

"Hello, my love." Bilbo greeted walking towards the barricade, keeping him imprisoned.

"Ten years I sailed the seven seas charged with the task you set to me. And then, on the day I could finally meet with you, you weren't there!" Bofur spat the tentacles that grew from his face writhing in agitation.

Bilbo's smile faded turning into something far more melancholic and sad.

"It's my nature; would you love me if I was any different?" Bilbo asked eyes seeking out Bofur's gaze and locking onto him.

"I do not love you." Bofur denied forcing his eyes to look at something else not Bilbo's impossible, familiar and above all gut wrenching blue eyes. Bilbo reached out a hand and touched the place on Bofur's chest that should be directly in front of his heart.

Bofur gasped his features changed and he stroked his beard (no longer tentacles), now looking like the man he had once been.

"You offered me your heart once, Bofur, then you betrayed me and cut out your heart and placed it in a chest. You've destroyed your purpose." Bilbo said retracting his hand and watching with sorrow as Bofur's familiar features melted into the unforgiving monster that was Davy Jones.

Bofur took one last lingering glance at Bilbo locked in the Brig before he swept away wooden leg thunking on the planks of the ship in an uneven rhythm. Bilbo clutched his locket close to his heart longing for the days when he would be free.

Bofur cursed himself for a fool for visiting Bilbo. Despite the fact Bilbo hadn't met with him, the one day out of ten years they could be together he still loved him, still loved the untameable spirit.

* * *

xxx

_Bofur watched as Bilbo almost danced across the ship pointing out anything Bilbo found interesting. Bofur smiled absently, the look in his eyes wistful and lingering with a tiny hint of sadness marking the depths. _

_Eventually Bilbo tired of looking round Bofur's new ship, The Flying Dutchman, and joined Bofur leaning against the centre mast watching the sunset over the sparkling waves. Bilbo sighed softly a fierce yearning in that soft sound._

_"You will wait for me, won't you?" Bofur asked unable to keep a lid on his desperate question. Bilbo turned to face him raising an incredulous eyebrow._

_"Of course I won't wait! Why would I wait on the shore like an old fishwife?" Bilbo asked with a shake of his head. Bofur smiled painfully, that wasn't quite what he meant. Bilbo caught the smile and eyed Bofur speculatively._

_"I won't forget you, you are mine, I have your heart as you have mine." Bilbo stated leaning against Bofur's chest in an uncharacteristic move, Bilbo never leant against anyone, not even when he was exhausted. Bofur's smile lost its pained edges. He had worried that with the ten year gap between him being able to visit the shore Bilbo would find someone else. Or perhaps grow bored of waiting, Bilbo was not known for his staid, steady and calm nature but Bofur supposed despite his lovers fickleness there was a loyalty there, Bilbo could be incredibly loyal but it was a fickle loyalty and hard to predict._

_"You silly man." Bilbo commented with a smile and a mischievous glint in his eyes that made Bofur sure Bilbo was inwardly laughing at him._

_Six months after he had begun his duties, ferrying the souls of the dead to the other world Bofur had a visitor to his ship, an unexpected and extremely welcome visitor._

_"Bilbo!" Bofur exclaimed happy to see him but surprised, he hadn't expected to see Bilbo for ten years. Bilbo shook his head at Bofur's surprise his damp curls flinging droplets of water._

_"You silly, silly man. I said I would not wait for you, why wait when I can visit?" Bilbo asked teasingly striding off to Bofur's private quarters._

_Bofur grinned._

_He had not assumed Bilbo could travel across the waves without usual transport like a ship, but Bilbo had surprised him once more. But maybe, Bofur thought, maybe Bilbo could hear the sea telling him where he was and will himself to wherever Bilbo wanted. It was odd speculation but Bofur did not know all of Bilbo's capabilities even now, after six years of being together._

_The visits did not occur often and it could be a couple of years where Bofur wouldn't see Bilbo. He never made demands on Bilbo's time and Bilbo never offered an excuse why he didn't visit before or more often._

_Then came the ten year mark, when Bofur would be able to step on shore for one whole day. He was looking forward to it immensely, he loved the sea, adored it, yet he did occasionally long for land. But most of all he was looking to enjoy the day with his lover, an entire day of just Bilbo and him on dry land._

_Bofur waited on the shore feeling his feet sink into the sand with delight. _

_He waited as the hours passed and still Bilbo did not turn up._

_Bofur waited until the very last moment when he could not conceal from himself a moment longer that Bilbo was not coming, that he was not going to show up._

_Bofur was utterly enraged as he stomped back on board of his ship._

_The next time Bilbo dropped by for a visit Bofur threatened to throw him overboard or shoot him. Bilbo's confused look had sent his rage spiralling and the next time Bofur could spend a day on shore he informed the Brethren court how they could trap Bilbo, god of the sea, in mortal bonds. Something Bilbo had told him about, a secret Bilbo had told Bofur trustingly, love shining from those fathomless eyes._

* * *

xxx

Balin freed Bilbo from his mortal bonds and watched with deep apprehension as Bilbo seemed to disintegrate, particles floating gracefully into the sea.

All at once a sudden storm brewed up and the waters that had been placid just moments before swirled and moved treacherously.

The pirate court united fought the Naval ships despite the danger of the thunderous storm. They cheered as the navy turned tail after a bloody battle and fled away from the might of the pirates joined together as a team against the overwhelming odds.

Balin could have sworn at the end, after it had been discovered that there was a new captain of the Flying Dutchman, Davy Jones had been killed in the battle, that he saw the shadowy forms of Bilbo entwined with a man with a passing resemblance to the recently dead Davy Jones, their silhouettes formed from the water rising above the tempestuous waves.


	20. Chapter 20 CowboyWestern

**5. Western/Cowboys**

**Disclaimer.**

**Warnings: Umm...none. Mentions of slash. Bilbo/Thorin.**

**Home town, ranch. Not very cowboy-y oops. **

* * *

xxx

Bilbo stared at the wedding invitation stumped.

Mahal was he really that old? Old enough that his friends were getting hitched? Bilbo stared at the invitation like it would randomly get up and start roping cattle.

"Blimey." Bilbo said shakily running a hand down his face. But really, Bombur deciding to marry? The guy didn't like commitment last Bilbo had heard and enjoyed taking life easy, without the hassle married life would give him.

Bilbo sighed shaking his head exasperatedly at his thoughts, 35 wasn't old.

Bilbo looked askance at the invitation just in case it would explode and say 'April fool!', a foolish thought since it was June. Were all his friends getting married now? Gloin had married a few years back; three to be precise and they had a baby on the way.

Bilbo had left his home town as soon as he could, heading to a university in the middle of a sprawling city, far away from the place he had grown up in.

Well it seemed he would be taking a trip back to the ranch. He hadn't been back there for little over ten years.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo stared at the sprawling plains that stretched further than the eye could see through the window of the car he was hiring. It was stunning, the red dust was absolutely beautifully bleak and it stirred up an odd feeling of discontent in his chest but it was beautiful nonetheless. It made him feel a little hollow, a little out of his depth the wide open plains, he no longer felt the carefree love when looking upon the scenery that he had as a boy and a teenager.

He had been in the city far too long.

His eyes feasted on the sights he had deprived himself of for years and Bilbo felt himself relax, the tiny unnoticeable piece of him that he hadn't even realised was tense relaxed in the idyllic scenery of his youth.

He couldn't have pushed away his wide smile for all the money in the world.

He was home.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo helped his mother unpack a few boxes to sort; he couldn't believe how much clutter she had collected of their lives, Belladonna, Bungo and Bilbo's.

Bilbo dug into one dusty box noting the birthday cards with an askance look. They were from when he was fifteen at least and Bilbo was willing to bet he would find a birthday card for him when he was five.

"You collect the oddest of things, mum." Bilbo said with a fond smile as he tipped the cards into the big black dustbin bag that was set between them. Belladonna tsked with a shake of her head.

"It's not odd to want reminders of the fact your only child has passed a certain age." Bella said with a smile plucking the top card off the pile Bilbo had set in the bin and toying with the cartoon balloons and a cake absently reading the messily scrawled birthday wishes. Suddenly Bella squealed thrusting the card under Bilbo's nose. Bilbo blinked looking at his mother in concern.

"Read it!" Bella ordered laughter in her eyes. Bilbo looked down; there in a recognisable scrawl was a message.

_-B:_

_Enjoy the day; at least it's no longer illegal_

_for you to drink although you can't buy the _

_booze yet._

_Anyway, here's to getting older and me keeping _

_my promise._

_I, Thorin Durin, agree to marry you,_

_Bilbo Baggins, should both of us still_

_be unmarried at the age of 35.-_

Bilbo smiled, he remembered this. He and Thorin had toasted his birthday drinking booze stolen from their parents; neither of them was old enough to buy alcohol. Bilbo had snuck out of his own eighteenth birthday party, Thorin with him of course; they sat watching the utterly magnificent sunrise cresting the hill more concerned about their future aspirations than the stunning scenery.

Bilbo had lamented the fact that he was sure he was going to die alone and found three weeks later half eaten by wild dogs. He had been joking but Thorin had promised him he wouldn't let that happen all the same.

Thorin and Bilbo had both had lofty aspirations for their careers and this had meant Bilbo faced the very real possibility of him not having a stable long term partner for a while, which hadn't bothered him then. It was fine because Bilbo chose to go for a career but sometimes he wondered. Both Thorin and Bilbo had reached and even succeeded the goals they had set themselves at eighteen.

"Thirty-five seemed so old to us then." Bilbo stated with a wistful smile, it was hard to believe he was thirty-five and it had been months since his birthday. Bella grinned.

"So you gonna cash it in? Gonna make him keep to his contracts?" Bella said cheekily, winking saucily. "From what I remember he was a very dishy lad, probably even more so now."

Bilbo laughed. He could imagine Thorin's face as he swanned into his fancy lawyer office and thrust the birthday card in his face demanding he adhere to the contract he had written out half drunk. Thorin always looked so funny when he was shocked; his face was always a picture.

Well was, Bilbo mentally amended, he hadn't spoken to Thorin in more than ten years, things could have changed.

"It was a drunken joke. He's probably forgotten all about me." Bilbo said shaking his head at his mother's overly romantic daydreams. Behind her cheeky manner there was a serious look in her eyes.

"He was sweet on you, dear. You could see it, there is no way he's forgotten a single thing about you." Bella remarked softly, scanning her sons face.

* * *

xxx

Thorin scowled as he walked out of the courtroom the bitter taste of victory souring his mouth. Victory didn't used to feel like defeat but that was before he had had to take on cases and argue for the guilty party, get the guilty party to win a court case.

He ignored the utterly faux well wishers, their compliments and shoulder claps further deepening his disgust.

He was a top lawyer, acknowledged as one of the best in the field which was something he had wanted as a teenager and young adult but now, now...Well he would probably be happier jacking it in.

He entered his office the only place where he knew he would be truly alone and not have to act actually pleased about the outcome of the case. He now understood his old friend, Bilbo's, distaste at the idea of being a lawyer.

Thorin hadn't thought about Bilbo in years until his new secretary started working for him. The new secretary had nearly the same honey brown eyes that Bilbo had and it dredged up memories, sunny, warm, honey sweet memories of Bilbo.

Thorin eyed the invitation to a wedding he had been going to decline, he was incredibly busy. He picked up the card absently tracing the words. Maybe he would attend; it would get him away from smarmy gits for a while. And maybe Bilbo would be there.

He had grown up with Bilbo always there, more often than not in the background until they hit sixteen and Bilbo had been his rock. Bilbo was there with his warm steady countenance when his father had passed away. He remembered the sun shining, eclipsed by Bilbo's gleaming hair tinted gold in the light and honey brown eyes, molten with affection, that were so Bilbo.

They had been inseparable.

Thorin remembered lazy days spent chatting or in silence. And days when they were constantly on the move, enraging the bull kept firmly corralled for everyone's safety and then leaping out of the way, bull baiting was dangerous but what did two teenage boys care about that? The danger just added spice to it. Thorin could remember his heart in his throat as Bilbo came close to being gouged leaping out of the way with a careless laugh unaware of Thorin's concern. He remembered sneaking longing looks in Bilbo's direction, didn't he realise how utterly tempting he was laid out of the ground in a sprawl, shirt long discarded and only in a pair of baggy knee length shorts?

It was only when the invitation had shown up for Bombur's wedding that Thorin realised how much he wanted to see Bilbo again. Was he married? Partner? Kids? Dog? Thorin realised how little he knew of the Bilbo of today, he only had past memories to go on and that was of a shy young man, but warm and confident when he knew you.

Thorin made up his mind sending a message to his secretary to clear his schedule for the next month. He was surely due a holiday or seven by now?

He was going back home.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo stood at the party (held before the wedding and before the couple went away on a honeymoon) drinking in the faces he hadn't seen in a while. Bofur had visited him often and vice versa, it was easy when they worked so near to one another, Bilbo was a successful writer and aside from writing books he was a script writer for a few noticeable productions, TV shows.

Bofur worked in publishing, they regularly had lunch together.

Bilbo looked around freezing in place when he caught sight of someone very distinctive. Was that? It couldn't be...Thorin Durin?!

Bilbo's muscles suddenly came under his control again and Bilbo smiled widely grinning up at Thorin, had the git gotten taller?

"Bilbo." Thorin greeted voice rumbling pleasantly.

"Thorin." Bilbo responded absently. He remembered Thorin, knew his face but he sure as hell didn't _know_ the man before him. Thorin excluded power, a self confidence in his own abilities that he had lacked as a teenager and young adult. Bilbo drifted his eyes across Thorin's strong frame noting the minute changes. The teenager he had known hadn't worn suits nor looked comfortable in them in the way people were when they wore them constantly.

Bilbo laughed suddenly eyes flicking back to Thorin.

"I can't believe you're here." Bilbo commented breezily, snagging Thorin's arm and dragging him outside away from the crush of people.

"Me too." Thorin said his deep voice sending thrills though Bilbo's body and sparking something long forgotten. Thorin ran a hand through his dark hair a few strands streaked with grey. They were older, no longer teenagers, but there was still hints of the Thorin he had known there. Bilbo resisted the urge to throw his arms around Thorin for a bear hug.

"It's good to see you Thorin." Bilbo said eyes crinkling with his smile.

"You too." Thorin responded eyes roving over Bilbo's face. Thorin opened his arms wide. "Come here. This is way overdue."

A couple of steps was all it took before Bilbo was ensconced in Thorin's embrace his slight form completely dwarfed by Thorin, the top of his curls barely came up to Thorin's chin. Bilbo sank into the welcoming warmth of the oddly familiar yet different hug. Bilbo eventually pulled away when he felt he had lingered a little too long to be polite and he stepped back his wide smile turning into a more sedate but no less fond one.

* * *

xxx

Thorin couldn't take his eyes off Bilbo. Bilbo was standing to the side of the mass of people just watching. He was just as Throin remembered but there was something slightly different...something more to Bilbo than there had been when he was eighteen. He was just as short as ever and with the same inviting honey coloured eyes and gently tousled curls but there was an air of almost self confidence, this was a man sure in himself, not the slightly awkward youth Thorin remembered, and dam was it hot.

Thorin relished the warm body pressed against his own, he hadn't realised until now just how much he had missed Bilbo. Bilbo also seemed mellower; he could now sit back and watch instead of jumping right into action or nervously wringing his hands. It was a pleasing change to an already enjoyable picture.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo groaned as he slowly woke up, he glanced at the clock groaning again, it was almost indecent waking up at the ungodly hour of five thirty am.

He sighed flopping the covers of his bed off of his body. Well he was awake now, no point not getting up.

He couldn't help smiling to himself as he remembered the night before, like on his eighteenth birthday party he and Thorin had snuck out of a party to drink cheap booze and chat together watching the sunset. It had been like old times and yet so much more, there was something else in their dynamic, something wanting.

And Bilbo _burned_.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo absorbed in his book didn't notice Thorin was there right in front of him for several long minutes. Thorin spent the time mapping out Bilbo's features, lit by the morning sun as Bilbo sat in a chair in the garden.

Bilbo smiled when he realised Thorin was standing near.

"Come in, do you want some tea? Coffee?" Bilbo offered putting his book down and leading Thorin into the kitchen.

While Bilbo bustled about making the drinks Thorin absently thumbed through the random assortment of papers on the worktop stopping when he noticed something that looked vaguely familiar. He picked up the old birthday card reading the inside with a raised eyebrow and a slow forming grin.

He held up the card when Bilbo approached holding two worn mugs filled with coffee.

"So shall we begin a trial period?" Thorin asked waving the card a teasing grin on his face but his question was semi serious. Bilbo mock frowned.

"Hmmm. Maybe. Do you leave wet towels on the bathroom floor? Can you make a good cup of tea?" Bilbo asked cheekily.

"Yes to the first and no to the second." Thorin answered in like tones. Bilbo tapped his chin mock thoughtfully.

"Well the sex better make up for it then." Bilbo stated grinning widely as Thorin laughed.


	21. Chapter 21 Favourite Book

**17. Plot of your Favorite Book -(not my favourite book...but one of them) The Book Thief.**

**Disclaimer, I neither own The Book Thief nor The Hobbit (probably a good thing too).**

**Warnings: War time, deaths, WWII nasties, um...**

* * *

xxx

Based on The Book Thief. Marvellous book, seriously heart rending read.

Bilbo watched his mother uncertainly.

They were on a train; Bilbo was confused as to why his mother was giving him and his brother, Frodo, up. Why did they have to leave? Why was their mother abandoning them?

Frodo coughed wetly, the same cough he had been struggling with for months.

Their mother took off her coat and draped it around Frodo a worried frown creasing her forehead. Bilbo watched his brother sleepily open his eyes and their mother shiver in the icy cool even inside the train.

Frodo's lips were tinged blue.

Frodo coughed again and Bilbo closed his eyes, he couldn't help.

Bilbo looked into wide big blue eyes as the coughing didn't stop. Bilbo reached for his younger brother, grabbing his arm for just a little reassurance.

It didn't help. Not when his brother was cold and unmoving and the trains police were debating what to do with a recently dead corpse and a grieving woman and her son.

Bilbo stared sightlessly even as they were ushered on board again. He barely blinked when they were shown to a graveyard and a freshly turned grave.

It was as he and his mother were leaving that Bilbo fully realised he would never see his brother again, nor (probably) the grave, the tiny little grave for his tiny little brother. He glanced around desperately for something, anything here he could cling onto in remembrance.

His gaze fell on a book dangling out of the man's pocket and swiftly, unnoticed Bilbo snatched it tucking it into his shirt.

Bilbo stood numb as his mother disappeared leaving him with Balin Fundinson and his wife Lobelia.

"Blond enough to pass but those are dangerous brown eyes, it would be better all round if they were blue." Lobelia remarked looking over Bilbo's small form critically.

Balin took a different approach.

"Hey, there, it'll be alright. When we get home we can all have some hot cocoa, how about that?" Balin asked nudging Bilbo gently as he took hold of Bilbo's limp cold hand and guided him to what would be his new home.

Bilbo didn't answer. His mother had shivered, she had left her coat with Frodo, she would be cold going back on the train, even as she had disappeared Bilbo had caught the pale face, blue tinged lips and wracking shivers.

Bilbo placed shaking fingers in his own pockets.

Balin was quietly comforting as he tried to elicit a response from the child he and his wife had taken in.

Bilbo awoke that night and many others consecutively with a scream in his throat and choking sobs bursting forth as he recalled how the train swayed and the exact way his brother had fallen off his seat lips as blue as his icy blank eyes.

Balin always comforted him, rushing in calmly with soothing words, a warm embrace and then he would play for Bilbo, play the Accordion.

Until Lobelia screeched at them to shut up and Balin would put down the instrument with a rueful grin and a shouted back apology.

Four nights of Bilbo awaking in the dead of night was all it took for Balin to catch sight of the pilfered book, hidden under Bilbo's mattress.

Balin pulled it out with raised eyebrows. The Gravediggers Handbook, was the title and Balin was sure no one would buy it for a child, or anyone really unless they were a gravedigger.

"Can you read it?" Was all Balin said on the matter as eleven year old Bilbo stared at him with defiant wide eyes.

Bilbo shrugged.

Balin passed him the book.

"Read what you can." Balin said flipping it open to the first page. Bilbo's knuckles turned white with his grip around the edges of the book as he scanned the mess of stark black ink on white pages.

Balin eventually took pity on him taking back the book and setting it so he could look over the pages with Bilbo. Slowly and with a finger underlining the words as he read so Bilbo could follow Balin began to read.

He was interrupted frequently as Bilbo sought clarification on certain words and even Balin had to look in the dictionary a few times. They also stopped so Bilbo could mouth out the spellings haltingly, learning to write and read new words.

It was three in the morning when both Balin and Bilbo drifted off, both seated upright in Bilbo's small bed with the book open over their knees, halfway through chapter one.

And so Bilbo's midnight lessons began.

After his usual nightmare Balin would soothe him then read to him making a note of any words Bilbo (or he) stumbled with.

The next day Balin would give Bilbo a paintbrush and some paint and told him to write out the words they had gotten stuck with on the walls in the basement.

Bilbo had to paint out the words until he could spell it correctly three times in a row without a mistake.

* * *

xxx

Lobelia was crotchety and rather coarse but she took care of Bilbo in her own way.

She shrieked insults at him and Balin, calling them names and such and such but there was no denying the fact that Lobelia loved them both dearly in her own way.

Bilbo learnt a lot more swear words from Lobelia than anyone else in his life.

She made Bilbo come with her when delivering the washing and ironing Lobelia did for five different families to bring in some extra money.

Bilbo was allowed to run off and play with the other children on the street only after he had helped Lobelia deliver all the washing and ironing.

Bilbo joined in with the football games with delight. Here he employed the use of the new swear words he had learnt calling the other children all sorts of rude names and being called them back, it was great.

Bilbo was good at running, dodging and moving so he was always picked pretty quickly for the teams unlike Ori. Ori had a hearing complaint and was a slight slender boy, not good at athletic sports.

His mother had forgotten about him once and left him in the snow. By the time his older brothers had managed to find him Ori had been freezing, blue in places and his hearing had never been the same again.

Bilbo had gotten in a fight with some people in school who were picking on little Ori. Both Bilbo and Ori had been beaten up but Bilbo had landed more than a few good hits in, he thought he had managed to knock out Bert's tooth.

Later on that day one of Bilbo's classmates, Nori, had come up to him, apparently he was Ori's brother.

"Oi! Tosspot!" Bilbo turned around at the shout watching as a boy his age with oddly styled red hair approached.

"Twerp." Bilbo responded eyebrow raised. The red haired boy grinned walking in step with Bilbo as they wandered home from school.

"Thanks for stepping in and helping Ori earlier, it was stupid and you look beat up but thanks anyway." The red haired boy said flashing a grin.

"Idiot." Bilbo muttered bumping the boys shoulder with his own.

"Nori, by the way." The red haired boy introduced himself.

"Bilbo."

"Race you to the footie, if I win I get a kiss you win I get a kiss." Nori suggested with a smarmy smirk. Bilbo snorted.

"If I win you don't kiss me." Bilbo said dashing off before Nori could.

Bilbo won but only because he had started first, Nori was a very fast runner. He also wasn't at all put out by Bilbo's cheating.

"'Cause you cheated do I get that kiss now?" Nori asked with a teasing grin curling up his mouth.

"Not on your life, you tosspot." Bilbo responded grinning back.

Nori lived just a few houses down from Bilbo and from then on Bilbo and Nori were inseparable, at school and at the football they always taunted each other, teased and shouted insults, swear words that got their mouths washed out with soap more than once when Lobelia heard them.

* * *

xxx

Balin was a house painter; he was also a very kind man.

He would use the remains of the paint he had used for an actual job then paint for the poorer people who couldn't afford to pay him.

On the weekends, when Bilbo didn't have school, Bilbo would follow Balin round as he painted the different houses.

Balin was a settling presence, soothing and Bilbo orbited around him, he adored Balin.

"Bilbo!" Balin called from in the house he had just been painting. Bilbo joined Balin and the house owners, an elderly couple in the kitchen. Bilbo was handed a glass of a fizzy looking liquid that came out of a bottle that the cork flew out of with a pop as Balin opened it.

The elderly couple, Balin and Bilbo all held glasses of the odd substance that burned his nose when he sniffed it. After the others had taken a sip Bilbo drank a bit as well.

It was weird; it was bubbly and burned at his mouth slightly. Balin laughed at the face Bilbo made so Bilbo downed the rest in one.

It gave him a headache and made him feel wobbly for a few minutes afterwards. Balin just laughed harder.

Balin didn't get paid for that job and he just said the champagne, the odd bubbly drink, had been the payment.

The elderly couple didn't have much money according to Balin but they always had a bottle or two of champagne.

It wasn't long after that that Balin was called on to paint over peoples windows so no light escaped in the blackouts. War had been declared once again.

* * *

xxx

Balin gave Bilbo two books for Christmas that year ignoring Lobelia's insistence that they give one and keep the other for Bilbo's birthday.

Bilbo cherished the books not really minding when his birthday drifted past without a present.

At night Bilbo and Balin made their slow progress through the books, occasionally Bilbo would read aloud, haltingly but gaining in confidence. Soon Bilbo would surpass Balin in reading.

Bilbo didn't think he really liked Lobelia's and Balin's to children, a man and a woman named Thranduil and Tauriel. Thranduil had gotten into an argument with Balin, Thranduil had also insulted the books Bilbo had been given saying he would be better off reading Mein Kampf. Balin and Thranduil had shouted at each other before Thranduil left slamming the door behind him.

That night Bilbo heard Lobelia sob to herself to sleep in her room.

* * *

xxx

War didn't change much for Nori and Bilbo, apart from the fact Nori was always hungry but he had seven brothers and sisters so that was to be expected.

Bilbo and Nori joined a group who went to the orchards and pilfered apples.

The leader of the group, Thorin, was fair, he divided the spoils equally and Nori and Bilbo gorged themselves on apples those days.

In fact Bilbo almost forgot there was even a war until a stranger came knocking in the dead of night.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo watched, unseen, as his papa (Balin had said he could call him that straight when Bilbo first arrived, Bilbo rarely called Lobelia mama, more often they swore at each other, it was an odd sign of affection) greeted the newcomer.

It was a man named Fili, he was barely an adult, just a few years older than Bilbo, with broad shoulders and a moustache that reminded Bilbo of caterpillars.

Fili stayed in the basement where Bilbo wrote out his spellings, he much preferred learning from Balin than going to school where the teachers disliked him, they didn't believe his reading had improved.

It was days before Bilbo even talked to the odd man they kept in the basement, hidden under the stairs behind some old painting sheets and paint pots.

Bilbo ignored the odd man only spearing Balin with a questioning look after another of his nightmares. His nightmares had abated over the couple of years he had stayed with Balin and Lobelia but they didn't stop, not completely.

"Fili's father saved my life, in the war, and so now we're repaying the favour. You must not speak to anyone about Fili, for his sake and ours, Bilbo. It is important you tell no one." Balin cautioned seriously voice uncharacteristically stern. Bilbo nodded solemnly.

* * *

xxx

It was on the book burning that Bilbo stole another book.

Bilbo watched in the crowd, dressed in his Hitler Youth uniform next to Nori as the books were burnt.

Bilbo resisted the urge to scowl, why burn books?

It was later, when the fires were dying down and Bilbo was waiting for Balin to finish talking to someone wearing a uniform, that Bilbo stole the book.

With a quick grab Bilbo pilfered a book that was only singed by the flames and he tucked it under his shirt to keep it hidden.

He and Balin walked home together and Bilbo tried to ignore the pain, the book was burning under his shirt, searing at him.

Bilbo grabbed the book from in his shirt and dropped it on the ground rubbing at his sore chest and looking at Balin. Balin gave a crooked grin.

"Another one?" Balin asked nonchalantly, as if a book prohibited and supposed to be burnt to ash was a normal thing for Bilbo to secrete on his person.

Bilbo nodded.

"Well it's a good thing then, seeing as we finished the other ones." Balin said picking up the book gingerly and reading the title.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo entered the basement cautiously, still not sure what to make of their near silent visitor.

Bilbo crept into the small room silently shivering at the cool air, it was absolutely freezing!

Bilbo stood next to the sleeping figure watching the man inhale and exhale under a thin sheet. He reached out a hand touching Fili's wrist, it was cold too!

Bilbo jumped back when Fili jerked awake at his tentative touch. They observed each other silently, young Bilbo and barely adult Fili stayed in silence as the minutes passed.

Bilbo tilted his head to one side. Fili's hair looked like feathers and his caterpillar moustache was funny, he also had a scruff of beard that papa sometimes got when he didn't shave.

"It's cold down here." Bilbo stated breaking the intent silence. Fili nodded silently.

"Your lips are blue." Bilbo stated in the same distant tone. Again Fili just nodded.

Neither noticed Balin silently enter the room listening to their sort of conversation.

"You need to warm up." Bilbo stated without inflection barely moving as Balin pulled him into a warm hug and Fili jerked in surprise at seeing Balin there.

"He needs more blankets and warmer clothes." Bilbo stated into Balin's shirt. "Frodo died when his lips went blue and so did mama." Bilbo was silent as Balin just held him. Fili didn't break eye contact from the distant brown eyes that bore into his own dark eyes.

From then on Bilbo went down to the basement to read and Balin installed a small heater stove, something that managed to warm the whole house up not just the basement.

Bilbo and Fili would often talk, Bilbo would read to Fili out of his books and Fili would tell Bilbo odd stories about a Jewish fist fighter, real stories about Fili.

* * *

xxx

The Fili got sick, really sick.

Balin and Lobelia moved him into Bilbo's bedroom, into the second bed and drew the curtains at the window permanently shut. They were less cautious when Fili was so ill but that was because they were worried and the basement was far too cold for fever struck Fili.

Fili was so out of it and almost always asleep that he didn't notice Bilbo reading to him in hopes it would help.

Bilbo ran home from school every day to sit by Fili's bedside and he brought him little tokens from outside, a pinecone, a pretty feather, fresh spring leaves, buttons, the odd bit of ribbon. Bilbo left them on the bedside table so they would be the first things Fili saw when he awoke.

Bilbo sat in class morosely. It had been five weeks since Fili had last been coherent. He glanced to the corridor when he heard voices approaching and his eyes widened in surprise as Lobelia entered hair un-brushed and sticking up oddly.

Bilbo looked at her questioningly as Lobelia dragged him out of the classroom.

"Where did you put my hairbrush, you utter -." Lobelia near shouted from the corridor. Bilbo frowned in confusion. While Lobelia's words had been harsh her face was near beaming, eyes glittering with happiness.

Lobelia leaned closer and spoke into Bilbo's ear quietly.

"He woke up, his fevers broken." Lobelia whispered. Bilbo stifled a wide grin. Lobelia had come here under the pretence of Bilbo hiding her hairbrush just to tell him Fili was better.

Bilbo couldn't quite hide his obvious delight from Nori and Nori pestered him again and again as to why he was so pleased but Bilbo said nothing, he hadn't told Nori about Fili.

Bilbo ran home especially fast that day.

* * *

xxx

Fili slowly got better and once again the time for apple pilfering came once more.

Thorin was no longer the leader as he was finally looked old enough to pretend to be old enough to fight in the war.

Azog had taken his place as leader. He wasn't nearly as fair as Thorin when dealing out the spoils.

Nori and Bilbo didn't join the group for anymore stealing; instead they branched out by themselves.

Bilbo brought home an apple for Fili, they shared a conspiratorial grin as Fili eagerly ate the fruit.

* * *

xxx

Lobelia started sending Bilbo out to collect and deliver the washing and ironing by himself.

She only did three families washing and ironing now and she hoped that people would be less likely to tell a young lad that they no longer needed Lobelia's services than they would be to her face.

It didn't work. Twice Bilbo came back with a note and some coins, telling Lobelia that due to the war they no longer had enough money to pay for her to do the washing and ironing.

Bilbo only delivered to the mayors house now and the mayor's wife, Galadriel, answered the door for him. Galadriel was odd; she was always silent and pale, she never said a word to Bilbo, she seemed so distant.

So he was surprised when one day she led him further into the house instead of just giving him the money and washing.

Bilbo gasped as she showed him into a room that was full of books. There were shelves lining the walls and they were all filled with a multitude of differently coloured books.

Bilbo ran his hand along the spines of a few in awe; he had never seen so many books in one place, apart from the book burning.

Galadriel watched him an odd smile upon her face.

"You can read one if you like." Galadriel said in a paper thin voice, whispery as though she barely spoke.

Carefully Bilbo lifted a book off the shelf and he lost himself for about an hour just reading.

Galadriel seated herself at the desk and didn't respond as Bilbo said thank you and good bye, putting the book back where he found it as he wandered home.

The next time he came he found the book he had been reading out on the desk.

Galadriel hardly ever spoke to him but there would be a slightly warm glint to her eyes when she let Bilbo in to the library.

The library was always cold, the window always open and yet Galadriel rarely put on more than a thin jacket.

Bilbo told Nori about his reading sessions with Galadriel but refrained from telling anyone else.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo clenched his hands together as he watched the lines of Jews being marched through town to one of the camps.

Lobelia clutched his shoulder tightly so he couldn't move.

The family of three stood silently.

Balin flinched as one man stumbled, once twice before falling down to the ground. Each and every person being marched was unhealthily thin and haggard looking.

The third time the man fell Balin moved.

Balin helped the man, the Jew, up and handed him a piece of bread he had in his pocket. They both paid for Balin's kindness.

The officers beat the two men even as there was a scramble for the dropped piece of bread.

No one approached Balin afterwards apart from Lobelia and Bilbo. Lobelia had kept Bilbo with her when he had tried to rush to help his papa.

This was not the first mark against Balin but it was by far the most obvious.

Balin worried he had blown it advised Fili to leave, that soldiers might come by for Balin and find Fili.

Fili left after telling Bilbo he had left a gift for him for when he was old enough.

Bilbo was devastated to see Fili leave and wished him the best of luck.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo sat on the shore of the river his book closed next to him as he and Nori ribbed each other, teasingly.

Bilbo looked on as Azog and his cronies approached with a wary look in his eyes, one Nori shared.

Bilbo zoned out of most of the argument more focused on the book Azog had snatched.

Azog chucked the book into the river before leaving laughing, his cronies following suit. Nori looked at Bilbo's face and cursed, jumping into the river.

Nori clambered out onto the shore, shivering but triumphantly holding aloft the totally soggy book. Nori handed it to Bilbo.

"Do I get a kiss for braving the icy depths and retrieving your precious book?" Nori asked with a grin. Bilbo walloped him over the head with the soggy book.

"Not on your life." Bilbo responded like always but gave Nori his dry jacket when it looked like his shivers weren't abating, it was early autumn but the river was cold.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo and Nori pilfered the bread that was going to be sent up to the monks in the abbey.

When they heard the next march of Jews was coming through Munich they carefully ripped up the bread into pieces and left it scattered on the ground where the Jews would be marching.

Bilbo and Nori watched hidden in the bushes as the forcibly led Jews fell upon the bread with abandon. Neither Nori nor Bilbo could look away from the horrific sight.

Bilbo scanned the people for any sign of Fili, hoping he wouldn't see him because that would mean that Fili hopefully hadn't been caught but if he did see Fili then he would know that he was still alive.

Bilbo wasn't sure if he was relieved or downhearted that he hadn't seen Fili.

* * *

xxx

Galadriel told Bilbo that they could no longer get Lobelia to do the washing as the mayors household had to set an example.

Galadriel sounded sorry and she said Bilbo could come to visit the library any time he wanted.

Bilbo already stretched thin with worry over Fili snapped that she was pathetic, pinning away over her dead son and taking her penance as leaving the window open and suffering the cold before he stormed out.

Galadriel watched him leave sorrowfully.

She left the window open.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo decided he was going to take a book from Galadriel's library; Nori seemed game for it as well.

Bilbo felt a smidgeon of guilt as he stole a book, breaking into the mayor's house through the ever open window but he overrode it.

Nori again asked for a kiss for helping and Bilbo gave his customary response.

Balin didn't ask where the new book came from.

Once Bilbo had finished with the book he took it with him (alone this time) to return it and grab another one.

Bilbo found a note on the desk along with a dictionary and a plate of biscuits left out and slightly old now.

The note was from Galadriel to Bilbo. She knew he had taken a book and asked him to come through the front door next time and that he was welcome any time. She left him the dictionary to help look up any words he didn't know. Bilbo left taking the biscuits and the dictionary.

He shared the biscuits with Nori.

* * *

xxx

Balin's actions with helping the Jewish man did come back to haunt him. Balin was drafted to help the war effort, not a soldier but to help put out fires and clear rubble etc.

After Balin left Bilbo heard odd noises coming from Lobelia and Balin's bedroom. He peeked in to see Lobelia sitting on the bed, the accordion strapped to her chest and she was crying, great heaving breathless sobs, as she silently played the accordion.

Bilbo let her be.

He retreated to the basement to read or to just stare at his words on the wall blankly.

Lobelia gave Bilbo the gift Fili had left him, saying Bilbo was probably old enough now.

Fili had painted over the pages in the Mein Kampf book that Balin had used to hide the note he sent to Fili to say which house to come to. And on each painted white page Fili had written his own story, a story about the power of words and a young man who hid in a tree until a young boy spoke to him and the man climbed down and hand in hand the man and the boy walked away, having felled the bad mans words.

There were little sketches by the writing and Bilbo smiled to see depictions of him and Fili walking in the trees together.

Bilbo visited Galadriel's library again and he just sat on the floor of the cold library a book by his side. With an inarticulate shout of rage and despair Bilbo tore up the book, pages scattering and a lone tear tracing down his face.

Bilbo eventually shook himself out of it and left a note apologising for ripping up the book for Galadriel and stating he wouldn't come again because the words had stopped talking to him.

Two days later Bilbo got a surprise as Galadriel visited his house.

She didn't stay long only dropping off a dark leather bound book empty of writing and a note saying that his writing in the letter had been good and that perhaps if the words didn't talk to him he could write some of his own.

Bilbo spent many nights writing in the book in the basement that they had been told was too shallow to shelter people in the event of an air raid.

* * *

xxx

Nori understood what Bilbo was feeling when his papa had been taken away to help with the war. Elrond, Nori's father, had refused to let his son, Nori, be taken away to a special school because of his good grades and athletic ability, Elrond hadn't wanted him so far away from his family so he had refused.

In punishment Elrond had been sent to do the same jobs that Balin was doing.

Bilbo and Nori continued leaving out stolen bread and stuff for the groups of Jews marched through Munich, they were never caught.

And Bilbo always desperately scanned the crowd for any sign of feathery hair and caterpillar moustaches.

And eventually Bilbo saw him.

Bilbo froze for a moment before dashing through the crowd and making his way to Fili ignoring Nori's attempts to drag him back. Bilbo slammed into Fili hugging him tightly as Fili desperately hugged him back.

Bilbo was wrenched from Fili by a few of the officers but Bilbo escaped and ran to Fili again tears running down his face, Fili looked so thin, so ill.

Eventually the officers started kicking at Bilbo to make him stay away and Bilbo fell to the ground unheeding of the pain that wracked his body as he cried for Fili. Nori pulled Bilbo up and away, taking him away from the stares.

Bilbo told Nori all about Fili, how he had hidden in the basement and been near death in Bilbo's bedroom.

* * *

xxx

The street was asleep when it happened.

The bombs fell and there wasn't an air raid warning. Everyone was asleep apart from one lone teenage boy sitting in the basement scribbling away into his little dark book.

The street was decimated, no one left alive.

Lobelia and Balin (who had been home on leave), Nori and his brothers and sisters and mother, everyone on the street was dead and the cleanup crews sorted through the rubble just encase there were any survivors.

One young recruit heard a peculiar tapping noise from under the rubble in one house and he called the others over.

After hours of shifting bricks and rubble they found a teenage boy still alive and only shaken, he had been inside the basement.

"You're lucky lad, how did you know to go to the basement?" One man said but Bilbo ignored him focused on finding his beloved papa and mama.

Their basement was said to be too shallow and Bilbo hadn't known there would be a raid, he was just writing when he couldn't sleep which was often.

Bilbo silently watched as his mama and papa were unearthed, and his neighbours, people he knew.

Tears streamed from his eyes and he found Nori looking as though he was just asleep disregarding the lack of breathing and the bloody mess of his chest.

Bilbo pressed a kiss to Nori's unresponsive lips, the kiss Nori had always asked for and Bilbo had replied 'not on your life'.

Bilbo didn't respond when he was taken in by Galadriel to the mayor's house, nor when Galadriel and the mayor he didn't know adopted him.

* * *

xxx

People remarked on the odd looking lad that attended the funeral for those who died in the bombing, he was dressed in fine clothes but there was a thick layer of dust and dirt covering his body, his clothes were clean whereas he hadn't bathed since the bombing, he had a layer of Himmel Street on his skin.

After the funeral Bilbo walked, fully clothed, into the river letting it wash away all of the grime he had carried for a week and letting his tears flow with it.

He and Galadriel spent many long hours in the library.

Elrond returned for the funeral stricken by the thought that if he had sent Nori away to the fine school he was offered then Nori would still be alive instead of him. Elrond made sure Bilbo was alright before he was sent off on another job.

* * *

xxx

It was years later, and Munich was still recovering from the war when a man with feathery hair and a caterpillar moustache made his way to Elrond's tailor shop where a young man worked as the assistant, the young man who lived with the mayor and his wife.

Bilbo uttered a pleased cry as he spotted Fili and he ran to him embracing him and being embraced in return. Elrond smiled from behind the desk and he sent Bilbo off, a few hours earlier.

Both Fili and Bilbo spoke of the time that they had spent since last they saw each other.

Neither stayed in Germany all their lives. Bilbo and Fili moved to Sydney, together and adopted three children, Bifur, Bofur and Bombur.

Galadriel shut the window in the library and the entire family, when they visited, spent days in the library, reading.

Bilbo kept the book Fili had given him.


	22. Chapter 22 Mafia

Disclaimer.

Warnings:...um...

Gen.

* * *

6. 1920s/Mafia

* * *

Everyone in Erebor knew there were three reigning families.

The Durins, The Greenwoods and The Dragons.

Everyone knew you did not under any circumstances piss off any of those three families because they could do much more to you than make you disappear in the dead of night.

Which is why when one person decided to do precisely this; it was the talk of Erebor for _months_.

One single person had managed to piss off all three families and send them baying for his blood in one single action.

He had stolen the Arkenstone.

The Arkestone was the very pillar of the foundations of the agreement the Durins, Greenwoods and Dragons had all come to after the legendary battle to wrest control of Erebor. It had been a literal bloodbath, people had been afraid to go out on the streets in broad daylight. Until the families had held a council.

Gandalf and Elrond had both interceded and managed to get the three families into a meeting to settle the dispute. So they all agreed to lead one third of Erebor each and at the heart of the city, where their boundaries all met they placed the Arkenstone as a sign of goodwill and continued peace.

It had been there for years under some of the best guards and defences that could be found, each family tried to outdo the others in finding safer and safer ways to protect the Arkenstone and yet still let it be viewed by the public.

And that was how it had been for years.

And now, for the first time since that memorable time Gandalf and Elrond had browbeaten the families into a meeting, the three leaders of the families were meeting once more to discuss the travesty.

Naturally they were all blaming each other.

The Dragons blamed the Durins and insulted the Greenwoods, the Durins blamed the Greenwoods and insulted the Dragons and the Greenwoods blamed the Dragons and insulted the Durins.

It had been three days of these meetings and nothing was happening, no decisions being made and no conclusions reached.

Thorin sighed rubbing his eyes tiredly as his father went on and on, on another rant about the Greenwoods and the Dragons. He looked across the table at Smaug, who like him was despairing over his uncle's bullheadedness, and at Legolas, who also looked annoyed at his father.

For the first time in...ever...Legolas, Thorin and Smaug all looked at each other in complete agreement, sharing their utter frustration with their respective fathers/uncles.

The three young adults (only just eighteen years old all of them) agreed to meet in a quiet cafe just a few blocks down from the meeting room.

For once they were unanimous; they all wanted the situation to be resolved and quickly.

In quiet tones and with an eye on the door encase any of their families decided to pop into this particular cafe and catch them conspiring with the 'enemy' they discussed their options.

Unfortunately no brilliant plan came to them, no magical solution.

They stewed in silence refraining from sending various venomous retorts to each other with the bare remains of their willpower.

"Sounds to me your problem isn't regaining the Arkenstone but making sure your families can cooperate in times of upheaval." A calm voice commented lightly.

The three young men turned all wearing similar expressions of 'oh-shit-busted' and 'annoyance' at the unwanted intrusion. It all shifted to surprise when they saw the person who was talking to them however.

"Bilbo?!" The three men exclaimed all at the same time.

The slight teenager, he was about the same age as them but he was far smaller than all of them, smiled briefly before seating himself at their table not waiting for their consent.

"It's nice to see you all again, unpleasant though the circumstances are." Bilbo commented truthfully.

He had gone to the same schools as each of them for some time and befriended them in turn.

Bilbo leaned in eyes dark watching their faces intently, eyes flicking continuously, nervously to the door of the cafe and spoke in a voice only just audible.

"The problem is not how to get the Arkenstone back, but how to get your fathers and uncle to all work together. There is something much more sinister than the Arkenstone simply going missing behind the scenes and Erebor needs to prepare for it. The Durins, Greenwoods and Dragons all need to work together for Erebor to remain as unscathed as possible." Bilbo warned them darkly.

Thorin blinked.

"What do you mean?" Legolas asked suspiciously. Smaug's expression was unreadable.

Bilbo huffed looking round carefully before catching the barrister's eye and making a discrete hand signal at the barrister's nod Bilbo stood abruptly.

"Follow me; it's not safe to talk here." Bilbo ordered leading them through a door that said staff only and to a room just above the cafe.

The three men followed with slight reluctance, they trusted Bilbo to some degree but they were always wary of potential traps and tricks.

Bilbo led them to a light airy room and Thorin spotted four escape routes with his first sweep of the room and he suspected there were more. Bilbo relaxed slightly now that they were in rooms he was more familiar with but he started pacing after closing the curtains so people couldn't see inside the room.

"The Arkenstone was stolen to get your attention, to get you in the situation where your families are meeting up and supposedly discussing various ways to retrieve the Arkenstone. In reality you are going to begin to discuss something far more important but you just needed the cover of pretending to look for the Arkenstone so the real reason isn't leaked out." Bilbo said his pacing unrelenting and his brow furrowed, worry crinkling the corners of his eyes.

"So you know where the Arkenstone is then?" Smaug commented dark eyes intent, drilling into Bilbo's pacing form. Bilbo waved a hand dismissively.

"Of course, of course! And it will be returned once Gandalf gets here so you can all discuss the real problems that is threatening everyone in Erebor's lives. It was only taken as a cover and to get the leaders all working together." Bilbo informed them as if surprised they hadn't already guessed it or figured it out.

Thorin had to repress a smile despite the sombre circumstances. That was the Bilbo he knew, Bilbo was clever, very clever, and when he was focused on something then all else dimmed in importance and that was when he lost his habitual politeness and looked at everyone like they were all stupid for not following the same brain processes he had.

"Who took it? How did they get past all the security?" Legolas asked. Bilbo ignored him. Thorin eyed Bilbo's twitchy hands and employed a tactic Bilbo himself had taught him, when fishing for information always flatter.

"It must have been a highly accomplished person, managing to get past all that security. Very quick and nimble, not to mention clever." Thorin said in a voice that sounded as though he was just talking through the possibilities, he had a suspicion he knew exactly who the burglar was. Bilbo flushed slightly but remained tight lipped.

"Don't think I don't know what you're trying to do Thorin Durin!" Bilbo scolded a smile turning up the corner of his lips despite his reprimand.

Thorin smiled unapologetically.

"Nice try, if a little ham handed." Bilbo critiqued teasingly before looking at his watch and turning sombre again.

"Look you guys have to get back now, don't let on about anything. The stone will be returned tomorrow and Gandalf will tell the leaders about the threat that's coming." Bilbo said shooing them out and back down towards the main cafe room.

"Why did you inform us if we're just going to know by tomorrow anyway?" Smaug asked raising an eyebrow imperiously. Bilbo hesitated.

"Because...because you're my friends and I wanted you to be prepared for tomorrow, I don't think your fathers and uncle are going to get very far considering the insults they've been parrying, it may be down to you three to sort things out." Bilbo said in a small voice.

Thorin didn't think it was his imagination that Bilbo looked far more tired and worn than he had ever seen him and Bilbo was usually bubbly, always cheerful despite the situation now though he was downright sombre. It was an odd change and slammed home to the three men how utterly serious this threat to Erebor must be.

The three men were suspiciously quiet and thoughtful through that afternoon's debate (cough-arguments-cough) but no one noticed far too focused on blaming someone else.

* * *

xxx

True to Bilbo's word the next day Gandalf turned up to the meeting Bilbo in tow.

Gandalf managed to shut everyone up by producing the Arkenstone, after he checked the doors were locked properly. It was good that the Family heads were all so prestigious it meant that the room they met up in had every safety procedure known to man.

Gandalf placed the Arkenstone on the table and spoke before anyone (apart from Bilbo, Thorin, Smaug and Legolas of course) could regain their wits.

"There is far more at stake than a simple stone. Erebor is facing war and you've got to act!" Gandalf proclaimed ominously. You could have heard a pin drop in the ensuing silence.

The Family heads all knew better than to doubt Gandalf's word, the man was a wizard with intelligence, his agency spanned the entire of the known world and then some.

"I had one of my agents steal the Arkenstone for a reason, Erebor is facing total destruction. Sauron had regained most of the power and influence he wielded before you all banded together and drove him out and now he is seeking revenge. He will come and he will decimate you and Erebor if you are not prepared!" Gandalf declared visibly shocking everyone in the room.

Thorin swallowed but met Smaug and Legolas' determined gazes.

"What would you have us do?" Thorin asked speaking for his father who was too stunned to react.

"You've given us a good cover, arguing over how to find the Arkenstone won't raise anyone's warning flags. What does he have, how many men are working for him to have you so worried?" Smaug put in.

"And why now?" Legolas asked brow furrowed.

From then onwards the three young men ruled the meeting taking on the advice from Gandalf. It appeared they had shocked the Heads of their families out of their wits, well enough to keep them from arguing which was a relief.

Thorin couldn't help but notice the pride shining from Bilbo's eyes as he surveyed the three heirs to the families taking lead, and competently and with incredible acumen come to an agreement and plan what they were going to do.

Bilbo had had worries over how the three young men would react at working together but it seemed that worry was unfounded; the maturity Smaug, Legolas and Thorin showed was far beyond that of their fathers and uncle, they hadn't resorted to petty insults for at least four hours straight.

When the first alliance between the Durins, the Greenwoods and the Dragons had formed it had only formed out of necessity (and Gandalf's and Elrond's meddling), Sauron was spreading fear and terror in the streets, killing indiscriminately and essentially doing as he pleased. The families had stopped that, driving Sauron out of Erebor, that was when the agreement over Erebor was first made and the Arkenstone put in the centre of Erebor.

But Sauron was not one to take defeat lightly. The Arkenstone had been his originally and he wanted it back along with revenge on the Families.

In his exile he had been building up his forces, collecting new weapons and ammunition etc.

According to Gandalf he had enough explosives to send Erebor sky high-and that was just the explosives.

As the talks of sharing police forces and guards and where to station them as well as keeping the general populace safe trailed off Gandalf spoke once more.

"Even working together you will need help. Call for the aid of Gondor and Rohan, they will send aid. I also suggest you ask The Hobbits for help." Gandalf suggested solemnly. The last request shut up any complaints that Gondor or Rohan wouldn't help, just try to take Erebor for themselves.

"The Hobbits?!" The head of the Dragon Family exclaimed.

"Preposterous, The Hobbits are notoriously close lipped and a hidden society, how are we even supposed to ask them?" Thranduil, the head of the Greenwoods Family, asked sceptically.

Bilbo cleared his throat.

Thorin, Legolas and Smaug snapped their eyes over to him incredulously. Bilbo couldn't...he...

The Hobbits were a group of almost special agents, sort of. People were scouted as children and then taught to their strengths at a special, secret location called The Shire. Some were the best spies ever seen (or not seen) but it wasn't primarily a 'spy school'. There were politicians, detectives, assassins etc. all from The Shire, but for some reason they were always completely loyal and utterly reverent of The Shire.

Many suspected that the Thain (the leader) of The Shire had close ties with Gandalf and that most of Gandalf's network was comprised of those from The Shire.

"The Thain sent me here to negotiate what we will and will not do and how much help we can offer." Bilbo said in his usual smooth tones although Thorin thought he could detect the smallest tremor in his voice.

Thrain scoffed. "They sent a whelp barely past training?" Thrain asked scornfully. Thorin resisted the urge to punch his father in irritation, he could potentially alienate help freely offered and from The Hobbits no less!

Bilbo's spine straightened and his tone noticeable cooled towards Thrain.

"You have your facts wrong, Durin, I am the same age as the three men who have today laid the groundwork for a magnificent plan to save your city and I finished my 'training' as you term it five years ago." Bilbo corrected, his words were polite but his tone cold and he hadn't addressed Thrain with a title only his surname.

"But I digress I am not here to correct inaccurate assumptions." Bilbo continued to inform the Families that they were willing to send their explosives expert, best bomb diffusers, a few assassins and let Bilbo stay to help.

Again Legolas, Thorin and Smaug shared a glance; none of them had even suspected Bilbo was one of The Hobbits.

As Gandalf and Bilbo prepared to leave Smaug's uncle posed one last question.

"So, out of interest, who did steal the Arkenstone?" The head of the Dragon family asked. Smaug and Legolas watched Bilbo fidget slightly with slowly dawning comprehension while Thorin withheld a sharp grin. Gandalf smirked.

"Why, Bilbo, didn't you tell them?" Gandalf asked turned to Bilbo eyebrow raised faux seriously. Bilbo rolled his eyes at Gandalf's dramatics.

"Bilbo here graduated from The Shire with some of the best marks ever seen, he even bested his mother, the Great Belladonna Took and his grandfather Bullroarer Took. I wasn't surprised he was the one sent when I asked for the Arkenstone to be temporarily relocated." Gandalf finished smugly ignoring Bilbo's blush at his praise.

Thorin snorted, 'temporarily relocated', fancy way of saying stolen. It was amusing though, seeing his father actually gape.

"How did you do it?" Thranduil asked leaning forward and interlocked his fingers on the table. There was a distinct lack of malice in that question, the Heads of the Families were probably mollified by the fact that not only was the Arkenstone returned but that The Hobbits were helping them.

And they were far too curious about the illusive Shire organisation.

Bilbo paused in his attempts to follow Gandalf out of the room. He shot a sly smile in their direction.

"I can't reveal all my secrets, now can I?" Bilbo said with a wink as he placed the three watches he had pilfered on the table, the heads of the families looked at the familiar items with more than a little shock. They heard Gandalf chuckle in amusement before the door snapped closed.


	23. Chapter 23 Steampunk

7. Steampunk

Disclaimer.

Nori/Bilbo slash but can be read as Gen.

* * *

In the Shire nearly everyone had some ability to tinker around with bits and pieces of engines, clockwork etc but it was widely acknowledged that the person best at working with machinery was Bilbo Baggins of Bag End.

His skill rivalled and surpassed that of his mother.

But Bilbo Baggins was also widely acknowledged to be a little...strange.

He was fascinated by lands outside of the Shire and so soon after he reached his majority (his parents had died before he reached 33) the hobbits of the Shire were not surprised, scandalised but not shocked, to see Bilbo driving off in one of his new fangled cart like things that didn't need a horse to pull it along, it ran on steam apparently.

What did shock the others of the Shire was that Bilbo came back a year later with some odd looking trinkets and a Dwarf with his red hair in three peaks and no sign of his cart-like-thing that ran on steam.

The Dwarf stayed with Bilbo for the winter and through to the Summer before once again Bilbo and he were off, on another trip in the odd cart-like-thing-that-ran-on-steam that had returned after a trip to Bree.

And that was the norm.

Bilbo would disappear for months on end (always with his dwarf, Nori, they learned he was called) but he would always return sooner or later.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo quite enjoyed travelling to new places and far off lands, there was always something interesting to learn about another's culture.

And no matter how far you travelled there was always a constant that remained the same, quelling what little homesickness that Bilbo ever felt: The people (whether they be hobbits, dwarves, elves or men).

People were good, bad, both and neither and this didn't change even if you travelled straight for six hundred days.

In each new land Bilbo visited he found new things to tinker with, new inventions to explore.

Bilbo adored the hot air balloons.

It was in a hot air balloon where he first met Nori.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo looked around with slight apprehension.

He was finally going to try a ride on a hot air balloon. They were commonly used as transport and Bilbo had decided to leave his automobile in the (hopefully) safe hands of Barliman, the owner of the Prancing Pony in Bree.

He had paid Barliman a hefty amount of silver to keep it in one of the empty stalls in the stable and under a blanket so it would be hidden from thieves.

So gathering up his essentials (for travelling it wasn't much, just a few tools to tinker with, some food, a water bag, a change of clothes and a short sword) Bilbo had paid a balloonist to take him in his balloon to Erebor, his next destination.

It was somewhat awe inspiring while being totally terrifying watching the balloon inflate rapidly. Bilbo eyed the basket contraption with new found trepidation, would that flimsy looking basket really be able to hold their weight?

The man steering the balloon had assured him it would but...

Bilbo watched, eyes round, from the basket as the men holding onto the ropes tethering the balloon to the ground stepped back one by one letting the ropes go all at once.

Sudden shouts grabbed Bilbo's attention and he watched with more surprise than anything else as a dwarf (you could tell from his size he wasn't a man or elf and he certainly wasn't a hobbit) fought with some of the men that had been helping the balloon to rise. The dwarf suddenly grabbed the rope trailing from the balloon and swung into the basket, it was still fairly low down since none of the sand bags had yet to be released.

With a quiet grunt of effort the dwarf dropped some of the sand bags and with a jerking motion the basket rapidly began to rise. The man supposed to be steering the balloon made to knock the dwarf out of the basket but the dwarf was too quick for him.

Bilbo startled forwards when the man was tossed from the basket falling three metres before landing heavily on the ground.

Bilbo just stood there at an utter loss at what to do and still reeling from what he had witnessed in the last few split seconds.

The dwarf jumped in surprise when he turned away from the edge of the basket and found Bilbo just standing there. The dwarf with the three peaked hairdo seemed to decide it was too far to fall if he tossed Bilbo out of the balloon as well, for which Bilbo felt utter relief.

Bilbo finally found his voice when it seemed the dwarf dismissed him and was looking at the balloon apparatus questioningly.

"Do you hijack balloons often then?" Bilbo asked dryly, the man had seemed far too practised at jumping into an already rising balloon and subduing the correct people. It could have been luck but Bilbo doubted it. The dwarf just smiled slyly not answering the question.

"I don't suppose you know how to fly and land a balloon do you?" The dwarf asked in a cheerful tone. Bilbo frowned; of course the dwarf who had hijacked the balloon and forced the actual pilot out of the basket didn't know how to fly a balloon.

"I know how to fly one but landing is far beyond me." Bilbo responded a slight skew of amusement twisting his lips, when he had first decided to go on a balloon he had brought an instruction manual just in case, but landing was far more complicated than making sure they didn't fly too high or too low and navigating the winds while keeping the basket level.

"I suggest we tie ourselves to the basket, just encase it tips." The dwarf suggested already cutting a piece of rope to size. Bilbo copied him, it was a good idea after all.

"You know if we are going to die soon, from mishandling a hot air balloon we should at least now each other's names. Bilbo Baggins, at your service." Bilbo said his lips twisting with amusement, he was sure they wouldn't actually die, he could safely descend a balloon and if it came to it they could jump out the basket, it wasn't ideal and a broken leg was more than likely but it could work.

The dwarf snorted pausing in his work to eye Bilbo, a slightly surprised expression on his face.

"Aye, Nori at yours." The dwarf, Nori, greeted in return.

Bilbo checked the altitude monitor and the compass adjusting their course slightly with unpractised movements.

"Well since that we now know each other, may I ask how you came to hijack the balloon and toss the poor pilot out?" Bilbo asked curiously.

"A little presumptuous that." Nori said with an eyebrow wiggle. Bilbo snorted shooting Nori a knowing but amused look.

"_That_ was not presumptuous." Bilbo responded teasingly throwing Nori a wink.

"Fair enough. I suppose I disrupted your trip enough for you to deserve an explanation to an extra traveller." Nori then went on to explain the various debacles that led to him fleeing from Bree and dropping the many people on his trail by hijacking a balloon.

He had Bilbo laughing a few minutes into his explanation, something that involved goats, ale, another man's wife, some tinkering, a ladder and more than a little thievery.

"So," Nori began after finishing his tale and Bilbo had finished laughing. "What is a hobbit like yourself doing in these parts?" Nori asked watching as Bilbo tapped the odd machine like things that Nori presumed helped guide the balloon.

Bilbo shrugged.

"Wanderlust. I've never been able to sit still at home." Bilbo explained succinctly.

"It's not often hobbits leave The Shire, even the ones that live in Bree tend not to travel." Nori stated the barest hint of a question in his statement.

"No they don't." Bilbo concurred absently. Nori raised a brow and Bilbo grinned.

"I blame my mother entirely." Bilbo said raising his hands as though in surrender.

"Ah, couldn't wait to get away from her then." Nori suggested with a conspiratorial look. Bilbo chuckled shaking his head.

"Quite the opposite I'm afraid. She was amazing, before she married my father and settled down Belladonna Took was quite the adventuress. And a tinkerer." Bilbo explained fondly. He eyed Nori. "Let me guess, you left home barely an adult and never looked back." Bilbo guessed.

Nori grinned sharply and nodded.

* * *

xxx

It was quite nice to share the days of the trip with Bilbo, Nori thought.

It was isolated, being stuck in a small basket for the days it took to reach Erebor, but with Bilbo there the company was welcome and greatly appreciated. Bilbo was undemanding, curious but mild.

And Nori found himself looking through the world with new eyes when he looked at it like Bilbo did. Bilbo found delight in each new scene that met their eyes, each settlement they passed over and even every cloud formation they passed. It was refreshing to Nori, who generally only saw the worst of the worst, thieves and murderers, plunderers etc.

Despite the fact Bilbo had been born into money (quite a lot of it from what Nori gathered) he wasn't like any rich people Nori had met before. Bilbo was quite happy to do his share of the chores and then some in fact the only thing that hinted to his good breeding was his propensity towards a clean handkerchief.

Bilbo also seemed to find amusement in Nori's exploits not the disgust towards a thief that Nori had assumed would be forthcoming.

Nori even found himself telling Bilbo about his brothers, little Ori so enthralled by the written word and fussy Dori eternally pessimistic but always there when needed and with a strength that far surpassed many other dwarves.

He even, much to his own surprise, told Bilbo about the many times he had pranked the leader of the royal guards of Erebor, Dwalin Fundinson, and the times he had baited the dwarf enough to have him chasing him through crowded markets, vaulting over stalls and bellowing in rage.

Bilbo in return spoke of the mischief he and four of his friends had caused in their youth, his mother and father and about the time he had gotten himself lost in the Old Forest and met a curious fellow named Tom Bombadil who saved him from a nasty willow tree that tried to trap him within its branches by sending him to sleep then creeping branches over to him and dragging him closer.

* * *

xxx

It was on the sixth day of travelling that the storm struck.

They had noticed the dark clouds brewing swiftly and had crossed their fingers in hope it wouldn't hit until after they had landed, one day later.

No such luck.

Bilbo yelled instructions over the roaring of the wind even as his honey coloured curls hung limply and stuck to his face completely drenched. Nori did as Bilbo bid, struggling to hear him.

More than once their basket had nearly overturned, buffeted by the winds, only Bilbo's quick thinking had saved them from that disaster.

Nori looked up as he heard thunder and he was looking directly at Bilbo when lightning flashed in the sky. The lightning briefly illuminated Bilbo's facial features and Nori felt his breath stutter involuntarily.

Bilbo was looking out at the sky eyes wide with slight terror but under all that Nori detected the thrill Bilbo felt and the determination that burned brightly in Bilbo's irises. Bilbo's face was set in determination and when the lightning flashed he shot Nori a bright, burning and above all _alive_ grin.

Despite the terror, this, this was living.

Nori returned the sharp grin.

Bilbo began the descent sharply, he had read enough that when there was lightning you had to get the balloon down and swiftly, it was not good to be flying in such weather.

Unfortunately Bilbo did not have the faintest idea how to land, fortunately that wasn't really needed in the end.

The basket hit a tree trunk and jolted unpleasantly tipping both Bilbo and Nori out of it. They were tied to the basket but that was little help as they continued to fall, basket and all, down the tall trees.

Bilbo felt all the air leave his lungs as he thumped down onto the ground on his back. He spent the next few seconds remembering how to breathe, it was a struggle.

"Bilbo!" Nori called worriedly. He had been thrown too but as a dwarf had much sturdier bones and physique than Bilbo who was a hobbit.

Impatiently Nori cut the rope attaching him to the basket. He came upon Bilbo just as the hobbit was struggling to sit up. Nori ran anxious eyes over Bilbo checking him for broken bones. Bilbo pushed him away gently waving a hand to show he was alright, his breathing was getting easier and the only pain he felt was a dull throb in his back, he didn't think anything was broken, just bruised.

They waited out the duration of the storm sheltering under a tall tree.

By the time morning came and with it clear blue skies Bilbo was asleep against Nori's chest and Nori was asleep his head resting on top of Bilbo's.

They were still asleep when they were captured by elf scouts. They woke up when it was too late.

They followed their captors hands tied behind their backs and an arrow constantly pointed in their direction.

Nori scowled. He had heard stories about Thranduil and not many of them were good or kindly.

He was right to be distrustful. Nori and Bilbo were thrown into cells just across from one another and left there. Apparently they had trespassed and unfortunately for them one elf had recognised Nori, while he hadn't stolen from Mirkwood before his reputation preceded him at times.

It was down to luck, skill and the fact Nori hid lock picks in his elaborate hairdo that they escaped one week after capture.

Their escape method however, left a lot to be desired.

Nori never wanted to look at another barrel again and from the slight green tint to Bilbo's face when they had struggled out of the barrels he emphatically agreed.

* * *

xxx

Erebor was fascinating, Bilbo found.

There were interesting sights, smells and sounds to be found everywhere you looked.

Nori was off doing...something...and so Bilbo roamed the markets in both Erebor and Dale.

It was during one of his mid-morning roams in Dale that Bilbo came across a dwarf being held up by some men. Bilbo looked at them with narrowed eyes, there was something off about the scene.

It was when he saw the dwarf's weak struggles and blown pupils that he realised what was wrong, the dwarf was drugged! And the men were surely doing something nefarious if the shifty way they were behaving was any indication (that and Bilbo had seen them in the shady areas of Dale two days before).

Bilbo snuck up behind the three men and one dwarf in time to overhear the argument over what they were going to do with the dwarf held up between them.

Bilbo heard the words ransom, kidnapping and reward and decided he had heard enough.

Bilbo caused a small commotion in the markets by managing to make it look like two of the men had stolen from one stall, in the commotion the third man holding up the dwarf slipped away while his colleagues attempted to free themselves from the law enforcement.

Bilbo followed the man and the dwarf after buying a heavy bottomed frying pan.

When he saw where the man was heading Bilbo swiftly hurried on ahead of them and waited on some steps for them to catch up. With careful aim Bilbo swung, knocking the man to the ground (and the dwarf he was supporting) with a firm blow from the frying pan.

Bilbo jumped down the steps and left the frying pan next to the downed man, hefting up the dwarf as best he could.

Thankfully the tavern Bilbo was staying at with Nori was not far from the hidden alley he was currently in.

With a lot of effort, bit back profanities and sweat Bilbo finally managed to lug the dwarf to his room.

Bilbo had had enough healing and herb training from his mother to recognise when someone was under the influence of mushrooms (and other substances like that). Bilbo placed a bucket near the dwarfs head and got a basin of water too. Carefully Bilbo pulled off the dwarfs outer clothes and coat, his boots and trousers before settling the dwarf under a blanket and testing his temperature with the back of his hand.

Warm but not too hot.

Bilbo leaned back the extent of his healing abilities finished. He eyed the dwarf curiously; obviously the dwarf was of high standing otherwise the three men wouldn't have been ransoming him.

Looking at the dwarf lying in his bed Bilbo could see easily by the dwarfs clothes and ornaments that he was indeed a wealthy dwarf. The dwarf had thick black hair braided in places and with beads of gold, and mithril embedded with jewels. His beard was also braided; the dwarf seemed to frown even in sleep, his thick black brows furrowed.

Bilbo eyed the heavy blue coat edged with fur curiously wondering how on earth the dwarf had ended up in that situation.

* * *

xxx

It wasn't until the next morning that the dwarf stirred.

Bilbo had long since gone to sleep in Nori's bed, Nori was barely ever in their accommodation as it was, apparently his brothers Ori and Dori lived here and he was visiting them, so he doubted Nori would even know let alone care.

Bilbo already up and dressed entered the room to find the dwarf struggling to sit up in the bed. When Bilbo entered the room he was speared by a rather fearsome glare from bright blue eyes. Bilbo smiled gently in greeting.

"Why have you brought me here? What do you want?" The dwarf said stubbornly continuing to try and sit up. Bilbo though it wise to remain at a distance until the dwarf knew he wasn't trying to harm him.

"I brought you here after I saw you being held up by three men who no doubt were up to something rather nasty from what I heard." Bilbo answered calmly approaching the bed slowly.

"What do you want?" The dwarf asked rather belligerently. Bilbo raised an eyebrow.

"At the moment I would rather you desist in trying to get up and then I would like it if you ate some breakfast, you'll feel better on a full stomach." Bilbo answered mildly leaning forward to help the dwarf sit up despite the dwarfs scowl and constant pushing of Bilbo's hands away.

Bilbo ignored him and once assured the dwarf could sit up by himself bustled out the room. He decided to be especially quick in getting the dwarf breakfast as he didn't think he would be patient enough to remain still.

Sure enough when Bilbo pushed the door open again he found the dwarf struggling to put on his boots having already re-dressed in most of his clothes barring the coat. Bilbo sighed handing the dwarf the breakfast and stifling an amused chuckle when the dwarf looked at it in suspicion.

Sighing Bilbo rolled his eyes.

"It's perfectly safe." Bilbo informed the dwarf keeping his amusement hidden. When the dwarf made no move to start eating Bilbo sighed again and took a spoonful of the oat and milk mixture and ate it to prove it wasn't poisoned.

The dwarf seemed satisfied by this demonstration and dug in.

Bilbo bustled about the rooms packing what remained of his things from the disastrous balloon landing and capture by elves (and the new ones he had brought in the markets), he had a feeling he and Nori wouldn't stay here for much longer; neither liked staying in one place enough.

"So why did those men want to kidnap and ransom you?" Bilbo asked curiously as he rolled up his spare shirt. The dwarf looked at him suspiciously.

"Look I was just curious, you don't have to answer if you don't want to. Anyway I apologise for my manners, I haven't introduced myself, Bilbo Baggins at your service." Bilbo said with a short bow and a smile rolling up Nori's shirt as well and placing it in the small pile next to Bilbo's.

The dwarf snorted, faint amusement in his eyes as he watched Bilbo bustle around the room nattering on about the weather of all things and the price of frying pans.

"Thorin." The dwarf said abruptly halting Bilbo's speculation about why the potters had placed themselves next to the glassblowers in the market.

"I know! Ridiculous but... What?" Bilbo said turning round brow arched in confusion. The dwarf fought back a smile.

"My name is Thorin." The dwarf, Thorin, said again. Bilbo nodded.

"Well, nice to meet you, Thorin, though I do wish it had been in better circumstances." Bilbo commented his warm smile not leaving his face, eyes a little brighter than they had been before.

Thorin leaned against the headrest of the bed. It was built for men, that was obvious from the size. He closed his eyes, his body still trying to get rid of the drug from his system and h listened absently to Bilbo's chatter.

A sudden commotion had Thorin snapping his eyes open. Another dwarf entered the room at a dash.

"Bilbo! Something's come up, it's probably best if we leave, now." The dwarf with three peaked hair said slight urgency lacing his tone even as a wide smile crossed his face.

"Nori!" Bilbo greeted with a smile as he gathered up his things and handed Nori his own few items. Nori glanced round and he looked at Thorin in confusion.

"I'll tell you later." Bilbo said with a glance at Thorin. He turned to Thorin. "I must dash, apologies I couldn't see you to full health. You should be fine though. Nice to meet you." Bilbo said in a rush, Thorin barely made out the words as Nori ushered Bilbo to the door.

Thorin blinked as seconds later they returned.

"What have you been doing Nori? I swear that's half the guards of Erebor coming into the bar!" Bilbo exclaimed shooting Nori an admonishing look even as his lips twitched with a smile and his eyes sparkled with glee. Nori shrugged.

"I may have decided teasing Dwalin again was a good idea...It seems his tempers just gotten worse over the years."

Thorin stared at the dwarf, Nori with dawning recognition; this was the dwarf Dwalin had been complaining about for _years_.

Before he could even attempt to do anything the door burst open and there was Dwalin, his customary axes strapped to his back.

Dwalin jerked to a halt when he caught sight of Thorin. Dwalin blinked in confusion.

Nori used this opportunity and swiftly jumped through the open window of the room Bilbo following him with a whoop of glee. Thorin could see them disappearing off into the crowds as they leapt from roof to roof easily keeping pace with each other.

Dwalin cursed from where he was leaning out of the window, long experience with chasing Nori meant he knew he had no chance now with catching up with him.

He turned to Thorin with a quizzical look.

Thorin groaned, now he had to explain the embarrassing situation.

* * *

xxx

Five years later when Thorin was exiled along with his nephews and nine of his closest friends he never suspected the very hobbit Gandalf had suggested to guide the hot air balloon they needed to gather support from the Blue Mountains, now land travel was being watched, would be Bilbo Baggins.

He walked up to the bright green door that looked newly painted and knocked, sceptical a hobbit would be of any use to his Company.

The door opened revealing Bilbo Baggins looking the same as he had five years ago, bright grin and sparkling eyes just the same.

Bilbo's eyes widened in recognition.

"Thorin!" Bilbo greeted smile widening.

The Company looked at Thorin askance; he hadn't mentioned he knew the pilot Gandalf had advised them to seek out.

"Bilbo." Thorin greeted much more stiffly, he could hear Dwalin stifle a snort at the realisation that this was the hobbit who had saved him from a kidnapping and a ransom.

"Come in, come in." Bilbo said after a blink at the sheer number of dwarves (and Gandalf) piled on his doorstep.

"I was just going to put on some dinner could I prevail on you all to stay?" Bilbo asked politely eyes gleaming in curiosity, why on earth were there twelve dwarves and a man clad in grey with a staff at his door?

The dinner was noisy, messy and a good lot of fun as things were thrown willy nilly but always caught before they could hit the ground, much to Bilbo's relief.

Just as everyone was finished and had washed the dishes and tidied up they heard the front door open and someone come inside.

"Nori we have guests!" Bilbo called out sitting near the fire ready to light his pipe after handing out his spares and some pipe weed to the others of course. Bilbo had quite the collection of pipes, Nori often gifted him with nicely carved ones, ones Bilbo was sure he had pilfered from someone's unsuspecting pocket, but as long as it wasn't someone from the Shire who would catch him smoking it he didn't mind.

"Nori!" Three voices exclaimed in various amounts of surprise and fury.

Nori entered the room looking visibly startled by the amount of people packed inside the living room. He blinked at the shouts of his name before breaking out into a smile.

"Ori! Dori! Good to see you again! Dwalin, pleasure as always." Nori finished winking at Dwalin cheekily. Dwalin growled.

Bilbo rolled his eyes.

"Must you antagonise our guests?" Bilbo asked voice a mixture of exasperated and amused. He didn't wait for an answer.

"So, Thorin, not that it's not nice to see you again but what brings you to my humble abode? I'm sure it wasn't just for a warm meal and some pipe weed even though longbottom leaf is the best pipe weed around." Bilbo remarked eyes gleaming with curiosity.

"The wizard suggested you would be amenable to piloting a balloon for us to the Blue Mountains." Thorin responded. Bilbo's eyes widened and he turned to the man clad in grey.

"Gandalf? Not the Gandalf, the one who had those excellent fireworks! Old Took used to have them on his birthdays, amazing they were bright blues, greens and reds. I had no idea you were still in business." Bilbo stated with excitement, he could remember those magnificent fireworks even though he had been a young child when he last saw them.

The dwarves snorted at his inelegant remark and Bilbo flushed slightly when he realised what he had implied. Gandalf chuckled.

"Why are you asking Bilbo to pilot a balloon? He isn't a pilot." Nori asked. Gandalf speared them with amused eyes.

"But I recall a story about a dwarf and a hobbit making off with a balloon a few years ago in Bree..." Gandalf remarked eyes gleaming under bushy eyebrows. Nori and Bilbo snorted.

"I crashed the balloon!" Bilbo exclaimed looking far too delighted by the memory than he should have been. Nori grinned in remembrance, it had been memorable.

"You managed to pilot it exceedingly well seeing as you had no training and had only read a small bit about balloons before. And from what I heard it was only because you were caught in that dreadful storm that you crashed into a tree at all, otherwise you flew the balloon very well." Gandalf remarked knowing far more about that particular misadventure than Bilbo or Nori would have ever expected anyone to know apart from them.

Bilbo shrugged dismissively before turning to Nori.

"I still haven't got the story as to why it was your fault the elves decided to imprison us!" Bilbo exclaimed eyes bright with mirth.

"It was hardly my fault! Anyway it was your doing that got us in those dratted barrels!" Nori retorted lips twisted in amusement.

"It was a perfectly good way to escape! We made it didn't we? Anyway it was your doing that meant we had to flee from Dale."

They would have continued had Gandalf not coughed to halt their banter and remind them of the others there.

Bilbo jumped having forgotten there was company.

He raised an eyebrow at Nori. Nori hesitated before nodding, glancing briefly at his brothers.

Bilbo smiled and turned to Thorin.

"Alright, I don't know how much help we will be but we're willing to accompany you on your quest." Bilbo offered.

Thorin took the offered help with a little scepticism.

That scepticism disappeared when he saw Bilbo pilot the balloon through a howling storm and land them safely in the Blue Mountains.

His doubt was shot to smithereens when a contraption built by Nori and Bilbo ensured Thorin and his Company's success at usurping the throne of Erebor, the very same people who had had Thorin (the rightful King) exiled nearly a year before.

Thorin was very, very pleased when Nori and Bilbo agreed to stay a while in Erebor to help him re-establish control of his Kingdom. Nori and Bilbo had a rather good spy network set up swiftly and they left it in capable hands whenever they decided to leave Erebor for a while and travel.

After all, Bilbo hadn't lost his wanderlust and Nori did so enjoy seeing Bilbo's delight at new places, it just meant they now had two homes instead of one.

A cosy hobbit hole in the Shire and a luxurious set of rooms in the Lonely Mountain, Erebor.

* * *

xxx

Bilbo returned a lot less frequently to the Shire after the visit he had gotten from twelve dwarves and a wizard one evening and the subsequent adventure.

But when he did return to his cosy hobbit hole it was always with the dwarf with the three peaked hairstyle, Nori.

No matter what gossip_ that_ caused from the Shire inhabitants.

Neither Nori nor Bilbo cared much for gossip anyway.


End file.
